Eposode 1

Sam is starting a podcast about men's mental health. He believes that men often hide their struggles and feel ashamed to ask for help. He wants to teach his audience, especially young boys, that it's okay to show vulnerability and seek support. Sam shares his own experiences of fighting against societal expectations of masculinity and the impact it had on his mental health. He talks about a dark place in his mind, represented by a black dog, which tries to isolate and destroy him. Despite the challenges, Sam is determined to protect his loved ones and keep fighting. He ends the podcast by promising more episodes in the future. Hi, I'm Sam. This is my first podcast. Never done anything like this before. I don't have any professional equipment. I'm not a public speaker. I'm just your average Joe Blow that has mental illness. I would like to share my experiences with other brothers like myself. Some of this stuff I've had to write down because I just won't be able to say it off by my memory. Sometimes I'll pause, sometimes I'll muck it up, sometimes I'll get it right. But at the end of the day, that's my podcast. Hi, I'm Sam. My podcast will be about men and men's mental health. Us blokes are funny animals. We don't like to let anybody know when we're doing it hard or feeling second best. Maybe it's the way we were brought up in the time the boys didn't cry. It just wasn't acceptable. You had to pick yourself up, dust yourself off and get on with it. Just take all that is dealt out and live with it. Don't complain or show feelings of sadness or despair. It just wasn't manly to say, what about me? I need help. How many of you guys are from this time? Such a smart generation, they miss the fundamentals of life. Life is bringing your children into the world, teaching them right from wrong, teaching them independence and being able to stand on their own two feet. But we also need to teach our sons that boys don't cry, and it's okay to ask for help. We need to teach them to confide in others when they're not doing so well, and seek the guidance of their peers and loved ones. We need to teach them that family and the family unit is about sharing the load as equals, and that it's okay not to have all the answers, and not to have to fix the problems all on their own. We need to teach our sons about love and forgiveness, empathy towards others. We need to teach them to cry and let them know that it's okay to cry. We need to let them know that they will need to ask for assistance at times, and that some problems are too big for one person alone. We need to let them know that it's great to love, but it's also great to let others love them, and let them know it's okay to wear their hearts on their sleeve, and let others know when they're not okay. I was not taught these things. My life was a continuous fight. I've had to fight my entire life due to the fight within myself, a misconstrued view of what a man was and supposed to be, how to feel and handle different situations. We all become victims of our environment and carry through the only way we know. The problem is there is a breaking point, a time when a man can no longer perceive to others he is okay. The crash of a strong man is not pretty. It's messy and full of hurt and despair. Breaking point can be dangerous for many men, so we need to reach them before this happens. I would like to share Sam's story with you, and we'll start by reading you a passage when Sam was not okay and went beyond his breaking point. Eventually, if you're not okay and don't confide, you will go to this dark place or a place similar. The Black Dog and Me The Selection The black dog is a warrior within its own right. It does not discriminate on age, sex or race. It is a ruthless hunter, the unseen hidden predator in the dark place of my mind, the place I won't share, the place I understand the least about, the place that can destroy me. The black dog selected me like a hungry animal. It wanted to go to battle with me because it knew I had already fought many battles before that had left me battered and bruised but not beaten. It did not want to go straight in for the kill. Like all predators, it selected me because it thought I was weak. It stalked me and then let its presence be known. The Battle The black dog is a conditioned warrior. It had a strategic plan. The first thing it did was isolate me from my pack. It wanted to get me alone and did this easily because it knew I would want to protect the rest of my pack from harm. It knew I would go willingly to this place of darkness, a place I feel alone, frightened, isolated, ashamed of my weakness to have let the predator in. It has kept me in this dark place. I have lost myself, the things that make the person I am and strive to be. It has worn me down till I have nothing left to give. It has taken what happiness I have had left. It knows I am fighting this battle alone. It puts me in a position that I am at war within myself, second-guessing every thought and action I take. The black dog tries to convince me there is no life at the end of the tunnel and assures me it will continue to hunt me. I feel weak, tired and just want to lie down and accept what was next, whatever that was. But I then think of my pack. I am up and fighting again, injured and weak but not beaten. I am willing to go to the end to protect my pack. The Offering The black dog has let me know of a dark place I can go to escape and to be free of the taunt and never-ending fight within myself. It wants me to believe I can have inner peace and serenity. I have been to many dark places and returned home. But this dark place I could never return to my pack. This dark place is where I would have to accept the defeat of the black dog. I would have to be willing to be in a place of nothing, no love or sunshine, just another final resting place. This was just another strategic move by the black dog. He now knows after a twenty-year battle I am a worthy opponent, a survivor who will fight to the very end to protect my pack. So he makes this offering to be rid of me so he can then start to get to the rest of my pack. He knows if he can get rid of me it would weaken my pack and he would then have a better chance of getting them. Worn but not beaten I am exhausted from this battle but will never accept defeat. I will challenge this bastard black dog until I draw my last breath. I will become empowered to come home from this dark place. I will take my position in my pack and live to fight another day. You can strip a man of his happiness and inner peace, but unless he gives it, you can't take his heart or his soul. Well guys, that's it for my first podcast. I hope you got something out of it and more to come in the near future. Thank you.