How Important Is Intimacy in a Relationship? 06142023

In this podcast, the host discusses the importance of intimacy in relationships. Intimacy goes beyond physical closeness and includes emotional, mental, and intellectual aspects. Emotional intimacy involves sharing desires, feelings, and vulnerabilities, while intellectual intimacy allows for open communication and expressing differing opinions. Physical intimacy is also essential for a thriving relationship. The podcast highlights five common intimacy killers, such as staying connected with an old flame or harboring bitterness. To build intimacy, it is suggested to take things slow, start with easy conversations, respect each other, and be sensitive to each other's feelings. The takeaway is that intimacy allows for mutual respect, love, and understanding in a deep relationship. Hello and welcome to today's podcast. I am your host, Karen Penn, and I thank you for joining me again here on Bridging Our Gaps, the podcast that focuses on relationship matters between mothers and daughters, fathers and sons, and husbands and wives. Today's topic is entitled, How Important is Intimacy in a Relationship? How important is intimacy in a relationship? First of all, what is intimacy in a relationship between couples? Oftentimes intimacy is equated with sex or physical closeness, but in actuality it's far more. Actually it is emotional intimacy that is the prerequisite of having any kind of physical intimacy with your mate, and there's also other types of intimacy. There's mental intimacy, intellectual intimacy, spiritual intimacy, and of course physical intimacy. But today I'm going to talk about emotional intimacy, intellectual intimacy, and physical aspects of intimacy. Intimacy allows a couple to feel close by sharing their desires, feelings, dreams, aspirations, secrets, and allowing themselves to become vulnerable with each other. Emotional intimacy helps build up the chemistry bond between couples. Emotional intimacy can also be only spending 10 minutes of quality time or helping each other with household chores so that you feel more connected with each other. In summary, emotional intimacy is a place where you both become vulnerable. Next is intellectual intimacy. This is a place where you have the liberty to express opinions in order to have better communication. Intellectual intimacy allows you both opportunities to share your thoughts and ideas no matter how much your opinions differ. You know a lot of people don't go there. If you know that you have a difference of opinion, you don't even want to talk about it. How boring are your conversations? This is a place also where you should feel safe and comfortable to share your views on any matter without the fear of being judged by your partner. You should be able to speak on politics, child rearing, family expenses. Each of you should speak freely and express your views and even argue them. This makes communication effective and strengthens your marriage. Last on the list, physical intimacy. This is the basic requirement to making a relationship thrive. Physical intimacy is a potent and common way of showing the love that brings you and your partner closer. This makes you believe that you have importance and a special place in the heart of your partner. Your submission, dedication, and belongingness and desperation for each other is reflected when you become physically intimate. Now there's also a simple back rub, a romantic body massage, holding hands, cozy hugs, or a sweet kiss are also forms of physical intimacy. Without physical intimacy, a marriage cannot flourish or be continued correctly. Now there are five common intimacy killers and I think they're important to note. The first one is when a spouse stays connected with an old flame or lover. Ooh, the intimacy between a couple is bound to die with one of the partners continuing to engage with an old flame or a lover. This does not only kill intimacy but makes a relationship become filled with bitterness, especially if your partner knows. If they don't know, you're living a secret life. Number two, when a spouse harbors bitterness. Whenever there are situations or conversations, like if you're talking to an old lover, that are not fully discussed where it's okay, although that shouldn't be okay, and there's some ill feelings about the situation, those feelings pile up and lead to bitterness in your relationship. Number three, when a couple does not talk about sexual desires. If couples don't talk about their sexual desires, there won't be any sexual intimacy between them. It's important to be open about your needs and desires for your marriage in order for it to become successful. Number four, when a couple's relationship lacks adventure. A little bit of spark is always necessary to keep a relationship interesting. When there's no adventure or elements of surprise, the relationship becomes boring and intimacy will die. Number five, when a partner is selfish. Selfishness is when one partner turns away from the relationship and stops thinking as a team. When the quote-unquote we attitude dies, both partners stop feeling intimate. Now those were the five killers. So how do you build intimacy in your relationship if you don't have any or there's minimal? Building intimacy in a relationship can be very challenging because sometimes there are other factors. But here are four to consider. Number one, take it slow, especially when you're just at the beginning of a relationship. Intimacy is never a rushed thing. Allow each other time to open up and build slowly. Number two, build intimacy with the easy stuff first like trying to initiate conversations about your life and dreams and goals and so on. Again, be patient and don't rush. Now I'm mentioning the beginning of a relationship. I'm talking about the beginning of starting to bring intimacy into your relationship. So you could have been in a relationship for a while, but this is an area that you haven't built on. So taking it slow is good advice, number one, and starting with the easy stuff. Number two is a good place to start. Number three, respect your partner. There can be times where your spouse doesn't feel like being intimate or you might feel that he or she is drifting away. Respect the other person's feelings and process, but continue to work on your intimacy one day at a time when you can. The last suggestion is be sensitive to each other's feelings. I kind of just mentioned this, but if you are in tune with your feelings, chances are it'll be easier for you to be sensitive towards your partner's feelings as well. It's definitely a give and take process. So what's the takeaway on today? Well, each one of us may have a slightly different opinion about what intimacy means, but what matters is that when couples are allowed the opportunity to give themselves wholeheartedly to each other, it's a time for opening a window of mutual respect, love, and understanding. With this, they can engage in an intimacy that binds them together in a deep, deep relationship. Thank you so much for listening in on the podcast today on how to handle intimacy issues. I think it's a much needed topic of discussion for couples. I hope you got something out of this, and you will join me next time on Bridging Our Gaps. Take care, and God bless you.