TUT 9/12

All right, you ready, you all rolling? Okay, five, four, three, two, one. Doo-doo-doo! We're sorry, New York Jets, but Tom Brady is not available. Please hang up your phone and call Phillip Rivers. This is throw-up tackle presented by Forkast.Media. Man, you gotta go find Jacoby Brissette. You know what, Tom Brady ain't available. He's supposed to be playing for the Patriots. Ownership flow, he out here hanging out with the New England Patriots and Robert Kraft, and you know how he go. And Tom Brady living his best single life, man. He's not interested in playing football right now. Here's who's available, Matt Ryan. I mean, he's here. You know, you could try to put a trade together for Jameis. Did he win the game? Or did the New York Jets having a top five defense win that game? Well, if you're the New York Jets, what else are you supposed to do? Like, you came in with all of these expectations that y'all are going to be a Super Bowl contender team, or at worst, a playoff team. I think the floor, if you were a Jets fan coming into the season, was playoffs. And your ceiling was Super Bowl. And like, now you're looking at your season like, neither of those things is possible. So, yeah, panic. I didn't think they was making the playoffs with a healthy Aaron Rodgers, but that was just me. I was being, I was a contrarian. I was a contrarian. I thought when I was a kid growing up in the projects where I had a bowl of crisp rice. And I poured it into a bowl and then I poured some milk in it. And it went... Like, that's what happened to that man Achilles. And, no, it was crisp rice. We didn't have Rice Krispies. We had Crisp Rice Street. We had Crisp Rice Street. I don't know if you... Winn-Dixie? That's who made it. Winn-Dixie. It was an hour over from Chex Soda. Like, so that's the way I was living. Dr. Perfect. Mountain Lion. Y'all know about Mountain Lion? And check out all the flavors. Check out all the flavors. They just went down a whole list of fruits and figured out peach, cherry, strawberry, apple. Like, whatever. You obviously do not believe in Jack Wilson's story. So why do you believe in him now? Because, clearly, Jack Wilson was not doing that. But one good thing happened for you. Outside of the evidence. But you know what I mean. There's one good thing that happened outside of the evidence. They didn't want to have to deal with the second round. Because the first round was too big. Because, you know, I just had to play. But, I don't know if y'all know people who have sworn to that. I know people who used to go pick up basketball. They used to play all the time. And they swore to that too. And you know what happened to them? They ain't gonna pick up basketball again. When you saw Kobe Bryant in the last matchup before the season, you said you were gonna go out and you were gonna come back and win. But Kobe Bryant was a little bit younger than Aaron Rodgers. It'd be the same. It's best comparable to Kevin Durant. Kevin Durant, like, went through the same sequence. He went through the same... Younger, but went through the same sequence that Aaron Rodgers just went through. Where you had, like, a strained calf. Or something was going on with your calf. And then you tried to come back because you felt like you was feeling better or you was trying to help the team. And then you messed up your Achilles and you were out for a very long time. Kevin Durant was out for over a year after that. And he's a much younger player. And the other thing I want to point out, though, is... Has nobody thought to do something different with their field at this point? The field is a problem, though. Did it have something to do with having a 38-yard left tackle? I don't think so. I don't think so. I don't think so. I don't think so. I don't think so. I don't think so. I don't think so. I don't think so. I don't think so. I don't think so. I don't think so. I don't think so. 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