Episode 13

Overcoming self-doubt and imposter syndrome is a common challenge. Celebrating achievements, embracing failure as learning, avoiding comparison, setting realistic goals, practicing self-compassion, and using positive affirmations can help overcome these challenges. It's important to reflect on past accomplishments, view failure as an opportunity to improve, avoid comparing oneself to others, break goals into smaller steps, treat oneself with kindness, and use positive self-talk. Overcoming self-doubt and imposter syndrome is a common challenge that many people face, including myself. Now these feelings can indeed hold you back, myself back, from reaching our full potential and becoming the best version of ourselves. So today I'm going to be sharing you tips, strategies to help navigate and conquer these negative thoughts that help me every single day. So one of the first ones I have is celebrate your achievements. So you want to keep a record of accomplishments, whether that can be a plaque, an award, a medal that goes around your neck, something that you can visualize, both big or small. So whenever you doubt yourself, you can look back and reflect on these to remind yourself of those capabilities. So for instance, for me, college baseball. I was able to play at a D1 university and get a scholarship. This was a huge, this was a huge accomplishment, an achievement that I can reflect back on. Also, when I was building my insurance brokerage, we hit the $1 million club. This, this doesn't happen for many insurance agents when I was back, when I was in the business. And for us to hit that million dollar club, it was a huge achievement. This happened years ago, but I'm able to reflect back on that knowing, hey, I can, I need to, I celebrated these, these achievements and I can get to where I want to go. I just got to keep chipping away. Another one is marriage. I got married, right? That was a big lifestyle change. So I went from single to marriage. So I celebrate those achievement, that achievement. And then last but not least, one of the, another one that I was on, on my health and wellness journey was high rocks race and Spartan. And these races that take 60 minutes, 90 minutes, 120 minutes, some of them take six hours where we're able to finish these races, the mental fortitude, the resiliency, the mental toughness to be able to get through those. That's an achievement. So what are some of your small and big achievements that you can, that you can dissect, that you can pull back and reflect on? You want to look at that, those when you have, when you doubt yourself. Okay. Another one is that I've learned is embrace failure as learning. So most people look at failure, including myself is, oh my gosh, they try to avoid it at all costs, but it is a natural part of growth. Okay. So instead of seeing this failure, look, listen, instead of seeing the failure as a reflection of your inadequate, can't say I can't speak inadequacy, view it as an opportunity to learn and improve. Tell yourself that be intentional. Hey, I'm just, I'm just learning. It's not a failure. I'm just learning and improving. Right. So for instance, for me is when I was in high school, I had the natural talent, but I didn't put the work in behind the scenes. And my parents didn't play the politics game. We didn't get, you know, videos out there. We just did the best that we could. I didn't have any college baseball offers, but I got the opportunity to go walk on. So it was a failure to some degree, but I learned from it, no college baseball offers. So for those that know my story, when I got to college, when I got the opportunity, I put the work in behind the scenes and ended up getting a scholarship to Stephen F. Austin state university. Another one was I was terminated. I was fired and let go from enterprise rental car. My first job out of college and also state farm, another insurance company. I was fired twice, not once, but twice I was terminated. So I embraced that failure and learn from it. It sucked for six months. Another one was, is I failed a series seven exam. So for those that, you know, like when it comes to like series seven and it, and it, and this is not getting like financial, but I, I failed that exam. And then when I used to ride motocross, that's why I used to ride dirt bikes back in high school, I would wreck and get knocked down all the time. However, I would get back up and just become stronger because I would embrace that failure. And I would learn from what, what to do and what not to do. Another tip is avoid comparison. Oh my gosh, this is a huge one. If you're a human being, we're constantly comparing, right? Whether that's on social media, whether that's in person or whether that's your neighbor, who's got the bigger car, who's got the bigger house, who's got the bigger diamond earring, who's got more money. It's just, you want to avoid the comparison. Okay. So comparing yourself to others is a sure fire way to fuel that imposter syndrome. Remember that we, everybody is on their unique journey and you're just on your own path of growth. And I have to look at this and tell myself on a constant basis. I've gotten better about it because I've just, it's been a muscle memory because I don't compare myself. I'm just, I just compared myself to how I was yesterday. So you can do the same thing. So for instance, the house, the car, don't, don't compare yourself. Don't compare your house. Don't compare your car to everybody else. Instead, look at your own journey and look at where you want to go. Business, wealth, money, getting to travel, fitness, body, abs, right? So it's so easy to compare yourself to everybody else around you, but avoid that at all costs. Another tip, set realistic goals. Okay. So one that I like to use is for me is I like, I wanted to lose 25 pounds in four to five months. So I broke that down. I set realistic goals, one pound a week. It was sustainable because it was a lifestyle change. So breaking down these goals into smaller, achievable steps, you will accomplish these smaller goals and gain a sense of progress. That's worth repeating. You'll gain a sense of progress. That is key. If you talk to any individual that has gotten to where they want to go, it's all about progress. I don't care if it's just 0.01%, just make small little actionable steps. Okay. So another one for me, like on, I like, I like crypto, I like stocks and gold and silver. I like to diversify. This is not financial advice, but I, for me, I like to dollar cost average. So like, for example, one realistic goal would be one Bitcoin, right? So instead of saying, Oh, I'm going to go out and spend $30,000. No, I'm going to dollar cost average, right? A hundred bucks, 200 bucks, 300 bucks a week, whatever, whatever you can afford $5 a week. It doesn't matter. The key is, is to, to break that down into smaller actionable goals, because now you go from $5 a week. Now, maybe you can go from $10 a week and you break that down. And then you pick your head up and go, Holy cow, I've got 0.25% of a Bitcoin, right? In 12 months from now, it compounds. Another example would be a podcast. For me, I was overwhelmed. I was like, I don't know where to start on the podcast. I don't know where to over start with my episodes. Who's going to be my audience. Who's going to, where am I going to get my feedback? All these were worries and anxiety and stress on me, but I just broke it down. Just, I was like one episode a day. It literally took me 30 to 60 days to create 50 episodes. So I knew what I was going to be breaking down. So whatever, whatever your goal is, just break it down a small little mini task and just attack it 1% every single day. Don't overwhelm yourself. I know it's easier said than done, right? But you're not alone. Okay. I'm right there with you. Practice self-compassion. This is another tip. Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding. Listen, whatever it is, practice self-compassion. You're trying to be a better husband. You're trying to be a better dad. You're trying to be a better leader. You're trying to be, you're trying to go to the gym more. You're trying to get less stressful in traffic and driving home. You're trying to be more kind to the person on the other, the 1-800 number. Practice self-compassion. Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer to a, your best friend. This is something that I'm working on every single day. And for example, for me, like health and wellness. One of the things that I'm the, my type of personality is like, I want to be number one right now. Right? Like who doesn't want to be, who doesn't want to be number one? Who doesn't want to win at something? Right? And so for me, it's very hard. It's a struggle because I have to practice self-compassion. I have to give myself grace and slow things down knowing, hey, you're not going to, it's not going to happen overnight. Like I'm a human being. I'm an imperfect action taker. And if I can just focus on my journey and focus on just being better than I was yesterday, then I'll get to where I want to go. It may take 10, 15, 20 years, but you know what? Here's the cool thing. We're going to be 10 or 15, 20 years older anyways, right? Yes or yes. So practice this self-compassion. And now, so for another example was, I couldn't run a mile to save my life. I could not run a mile to save my life up until about 12 to 18 months ago. Now I can run 10 plus miles. It's taken me almost two years to get up to that, but I've practiced self-compassion in the meantime. Hey, it's okay. Right? Just be better than you were yesterday. Okay. Positive affirmations. Another big tip. So one of the things that I do is I like to repeat positive affirmations when I'm feeling down, self-doubt, imposter syndrome, whatever it may be. If I feel like I'm not supposed to be, if I don't have the skills or the knowledge, whatever it may be, I try to reaffirm with positive affirmations to counteract that negative self-talk. So for example, so a lot of people and you, and you may be listening to this is that you have value. You have something to offer the world. And in order to do that, these positive affirmations will turn that self-doubt into something more powerful. Like for instance, you can either tell yourself, I'm not a runner or I hate running, or you can give yourself a positive affirmation and go, I am a runner. I used to tell people all the time that I'm just not a runner. I hate running. I don't like running. That is a negative affirmation. That is not going to get me to where I want to be as far as running. So instead, now I'm like, I'm a freaking runner. I'm a runner, baby. So what is it that you need to affirm in your life that you can say, I'm a freaking runner. I'm a great husband. I'm a great dad. I'm a great wife. I'm a great leader. I'm a great business leader. So another, another couple of affirmations is I'm a dynamic leader. I am happy. I am happy. I am grateful. I am awesome. Right? So positive affirmations. Another tip, seek feedback. Man, this is one that like, it is very hard for me. If you're listening to this and you, and right now, one of the things, a lot of people in my life are like, oh man, you're so inspiring. You're so aspiring. You do this, this, and this. Look, I don't need positive feedback. Yeah, that's nice. It strokes my ego and all this other stuff. But what I'm seeking is I want the constructive feedback. I want the stuff that's going to challenge me. I want the stuff that's going to level me up and becoming the best version of myself so I can impact and serve you listening to this to a whole nother level. So seek feedback, positive and constructive, right? Don't shy away from that constructive feedback from mentors, peers, supervisors, whoever it may be. But listen, listen to me. Are you listening? If you don't seek that feedback nine times out of 10, whoever it is, that leader, that mentor, that friend, they're not going to provide it to you because they don't want to hurt your feelings. So you have to intentionally seek the feedback, whether it's a friend, mastermind group, a brother, a sister, a cousin. Seek feedback. What can I do to level up? What can I do to improve? What are some things, what are some challenges? So you have to seek that feedback, right? From a best friend, employee, wife, diverse group of people, okay? Another tip, remember past successes. This is something to reflect on from time to time when you feel like an imposter. And I do. I'll give you an example here in a second. But when I feel like an imposter, when there's self-doubt, I remind myself of these instances in the past that can help shift my mindset. Because that's what it comes down to, right? Is what's going on between the two ears. Whatever your thoughts are is the quality of your life. So if you're angry, pissed off, frustrated, 24 hours of the day, guess what? You're not going to live a very fulfilled, happy life. So it's all about your mindset, okay? So for example, when I started my coaching and mentoring business in January of 2023, when we launched, eight months ago, almost nine months ago, I felt like an imposter. I had self-doubt. Who am I to coach and mentor these individuals that are super successful, that are doing well in life? Who am I? Right? These are thoughts going through my mind. But I remember myself of past successes of inspiring, aspiring, helping employees, helping friends get to where they want to go, maximizing, creating action. Because whether or not you see people in social media, on billboards, and across all lines, you never know what's going on behind the scenes. And you, listening to this, you have something of value to offer the person next to you. Your friend, your family, your mom, your dad, your uncle, your cousin, your kid, you have something of value to offer. And that when you find it, when you look, when you're intentional about it, like I was, you can reflect on that. Another one, an example is Camp Gladiator Finals, which is a competition. One of the things that when I went to finals last year in 2022, I was like, who am I to be here competing with these guys? This was going through my mind. I'm not a runner. I don't have what it takes to be first place. These things, even though I wasn't thinking about it every day, it still struck my mind. I'm an imposter. I don't have the skills to be number one. But you know what? I knew that coming in fourth place, and I learned from that. And I look at that as a learning. So now I'm trained. I had to level up. I had to train. I had to learn from that. Another tip, focus on progress, not perfection. Focus on progress, not perfection. Listen to me. Perfection is an unattainable goal, you're just not going to, if you're trying to be perfect, it's going to be miserable. Aim for progress, 0.01% better than you were yesterday. Aim for growth instead. Each step forward is a victory. That's the way I look at it. One foot in front of the other is what I would say. And I know you've heard this before, but life's a journey. It's not a destination. When you get to that destination, if you're like I was, I was goal-oriented, goal-results-oriented. I wanted to get to where I wanted to go. But when I got there, I was unfulfilled. So I've learned it's a freaking journey, man. So focus on that progress. Just be 0.01% better than you were yesterday. Another tip, visualize success. Spend time during the day visualizing your success succeeding in your endeavors. Whether if you're in sales, maybe it's talking to that customer and educating them on your product or your service. And them saying yes. Or maybe it's health and wellness. Maybe it's a push-up. Maybe it's exercising. Maybe it's squats. Maybe it's having a conversation with your kid. Visualize that success to help boost your confidence and reduce anxiety, public speaking, whatever it may be. For me, when I meditate, I visualize crossing the finish line for what I have coming up in October, November, and December, which is the Spartan Beast. It's like half a marathon. And then I have like marathon, which is a Spartan Ultra. And then for anybody, you listening to this, whatever you have coming up, visualize success. Visualize crossing that line. Even though you haven't crossed that line yet, even though you haven't had that conversation yet, even though you haven't had that sale yet, visualize that you have done it. If you want to make six digits, Sean, I've always made $50,000 a year. How do I make six digits? Visualize making six digits. $100,000 plus a year. Okay, Sean, I've made six digits. I need to make, I want to make seven digits. Okay, visualize making a million dollars. Visualize a house. Visualize a car. Visualize being financially free. We have a vision board in our house. We visualize adventure, our core values, financially freedom, traveling regularly, spending time together, quality time. Another tip, build a supportive network. This is so important. If you're listening to this, it's because you want to level up. You want to become the best version of yourself. Build a supportive network. I cannot stress this enough. One of the things, I was a lone wolf. Up until about 24 months ago, I was like, dude, this is miserable. I cannot do life alone. I felt like a lone wolf. I've always said I've been built differently. If you're listening to this, I know sometimes you can get lonely. Surround yourself with people who uplift and encourage you. A supportive network can remind you of your worth and help you navigate challenges. A coach, a mentor. That is one of the biggest things when I've hired a therapist, a coach, a mentor, somebody with a different perspective, they've been able to support me. A mastermind group, two or more people, accountability partner, therapist. Get that supportive network. Another tip, practice self-care. This is a huge one. The three pillars that you will hear all over the web and that I believe to this day to be the most important pillars are sleep, exercise, and nutrition. If you want to become the best version of yourself, if you want to show up best for your friend, for your neighbor, for your career, and feel fan-freaking-tastic at your kid's football game or baseball game or church or wherever you go, sleep, exercise, and nutrition are the three pillars. Last but not least, seek professional help. If you've tried all these things and self-doubt and positive syndrome are severely affecting your life, speaking with a therapist or counselor can help with that. And don't frown upon it. Listen, it's just maintenance. You're just trying to level up and become the best version of yourself. Nobody's judging you. These therapists, these mentors, these coaches, whoever it is, they can personalize strategies to help you cope with the feelings. So remember, overcoming self-doubt and imposter syndrome is a journey and it takes time and effort. Be patient with yourself and stay committed to your personal growth and development. Thank you so much for tuning in to the episode of Level Up with Sean Myers. If you've enjoyed today's discussion, listen to me. I'm going to change it up a little bit because I always say this, and you hear this, everybody else say this on reviews and stuff like that, but I'm going to be completely transparent with you. When you leave a review, and I can't comment on reviews, I don't think I can, but when you leave a review on the podcast, this fuels my soul. This makes all the difference in the world. I don't do paid advertising as of today. All the money that goes into this podcast is to impact and serve. So when you leave a review on my podcast and when you share this with a friend or a family member on social media, this allows me to spread the word and impact and serve more people on somebody who needs to hear this. So don't be selfish and hold this within. It would mean the world to me if you could download, subscribe, and share this with a friend or a family business owner and leave me a review. That's what gets me fired up. So stay tuned for more exciting episodes where we'll continue to explore topics that empower you to level up in all areas of life. Until next time, keep learning, growing, and leveling up in the journey to becoming the best version of yourself.