Digital Humanities Podcast

The Book Nook Podcast discusses Otessa Mosfeg's My Year of Rest and Relaxation and its portrayal of depression. The book follows an unnamed narrator in her mid-20s who is unhappy with her life and decides to hibernate for a year. The hosts have mixed opinions on the book's representation of depression, with one feeling it is unrealistic and the other finding it relatable to some extent. They discuss how the book highlights the extreme nature of depression but may not fully capture the everyday struggles of those with the condition. The hosts also examine the themes of the book, including the narrator's upbringing and the impact of her parents' permissive parenting style. They touch on the effects of grief, avoidance, escapism, and how depression can affect social relationships. Overall, the discussion explores different aspects of depression and the experiences of women in their 20s. Welcome back to Book Nook Podcast. I am Peyton Kirby and I'm Kaylee Spires. Today we're going to be discussing Otessa Mosfeg's My Year of Rest and Relaxation and how it relates to depression. Kaylee, do you want to do a summary of the book so people know? Yeah, so this book is essentially about an unnamed narrator who's in her mid-20s living in New York and she is just very unhappy with her life. Her relationship isn't going well, she doesn't have the best family background, and she's just struggling with a lot of mental health issues. So she has a grand idea to go into hibernation for a year, thinking that when she comes out of it she'll be kind of rejuvenated, a whole new person, and her problems will just go away. She's very unlikable and yeah. It's a great way to deal with your depression, that's for sure. So what did you think about the book when you read it? Honestly, I understand that depression can look in different forms and, you know, and it doesn't look the same in everyone, but I felt like it was over... it wasn't realistic at all. I felt like... You don't think the book represented depression well? No. I feel like it shows people that if you have depression you can't keep going and that, you know, and that it kind of... your whole life is just wrecked and you can't... you know what I'm saying? Like it's not like... like she can just stop her her whole year and just sleep and not keep on going and just do whatever she wants, but that's not really how it is. People have depression every day and they have to keep on going with life and do their assignments and, you know, work and take care of kids and stuff like that. What about you? I felt like it's... it kind of encompasses things that are like surround mental health issues. Like I'm sure at some point we've all wanted to just sleep and sleep for the whole day or the whole week and I feel like she just possesses all... all of the worst qualities that we might have. Yeah. When we're going through something like that. So I think it's just... it kind of represents it, but to the like extreme. Yeah. Well I feel like we all think that in our head like, well might as well just sleep and not deal with all the stuff that we're struggling with, but it's not the fact that we cannot do that. You know, we have to do... like we don't have a choice. So I don't know. Do you feel like you relate to the book any? There's definitely some parts of her that I can relate to. Her... a little bit of her laziness. Yeah. A little bit of her always wanting to watch movies and... Yeah. Not do anything. I mean, I feel like I felt that at some point. Yeah. I feel like I relate more to the depression part because I struggle with depression. I just feel like... I don't know. It just kind of makes me mad that she gets to, you know, lay at home and watch movies because I wish I could. I feel like she's kind of like a representation of, I don't know, women in their 20s, like when they're just struggling and going through a rough time, just like in the worst possible way and in the most extreme way. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I don't know. I feel like... I feel like it... the author could have made it a little more, like, relatable. But, I mean, at the same time, I think the point of the book is to go to the extreme. To see... and maybe it's to see how, like, how extreme depression can be, you know? Yeah. Yeah. I feel like I could definitely relate to her best friend, Reva, a lot more. Yeah. I just feel bad about, like... So, throughout the book, she's really rude to her friends and stuff like that. And, I don't know, I feel like she takes out her feelings on everyone else. And, honestly, I can understand that because I do that a lot. And I take it out on people. And, like, if I'm having a bad day or anything like that, I take it out on other people. But, honestly, like... I feel like we've all kind of been where Reva's at. Like, just trying to take care of somebody and be there for them. Yeah. Even in their, like, worst moments, that you just still have to stick around. To be honest, though, if I was Reva, I would be gone. Oh, yeah. I wouldn't have put up with that as much as she did. Yeah. Well, now we're going to talk about how this relates to the whole general depression, what depression is, and the different themes that are shown throughout the book. Yeah. So, depression is a medical illness that can negatively affect how you feel, the way you act, how you think, and just it affects your life in general. Mm-hmm. Studies have shown that women are actually twice as likely as men to suffer from depression. And they experience some symptoms more often than men, like seasonal depression, feelings of guilt, and atypical depression. Yeah. I feel like, I don't know, I feel like I've seen more women with depression than I have seen men with depression. Right, yeah. I mean, I feel like there should be more representation for men with depression, but I was just going to focus on depression in women because our main character's a woman. Right. And we're both women in our mid-20s. Yeah. We're all struggling. But also, women have different, like, physiological responses to stress. Mm-hmm. So, they produce more stress hormones, which can make them more likely to develop depression. It's very obvious, like, throughout the book that our narrator is struggling with some mental health issues. Yeah. You can see that she's going through all the signs, you know, she's feeling helpless, she's feeling agitated with the people around her, like her best friend Reva. She's drained of her energy, she loses her job, and most importantly, you see, like, the changes in her sleep pattern. All she wants to do is sleep for an entire year. I feel like that's a bad sign. Mm-hmm. And a lot of different factors come into play when we're talking about her depression, because different causes are, like, early childhood trauma, drug abuse, relationship problems, and death of a loved one, which we see all throughout this novel. Right. And we also see, like, how she reacts to other people, like Reva when her mom died, as well, and see how, like, different she was about that, as well. Yeah. So, it's basically just ruining her life a little bit, and her personality. So, I think we're gonna explore different, like, themes throughout the book. Different themes, different aspects of her mental health issues. We're gonna talk about her upbringing, grief that she experienced, how she's coping with it, like avoidance and escapism, and then how it affects her social life and her different relationships. So, Peyton, if you want to touch on her upbringing. Yeah. Yeah, so throughout the book, the main characters' parents were not very affectionate, and they didn't really give her any attention. So, she was kind of just, like, on her own. She had to figure things out on her own, and her parents definitely show more of a permissive parenting style, and they were like, kind of, do whatever you want, and stuff like that. Her parents weren't affectionate at all, so, like, when she would, she felt like she couldn't go to her parents about anything, or anything like that, and after her dad died, her mom wasn't really there for her, and she would just drink and sleep, and so, like, when she wanted her mom to sit there and rub her hair, or comfort her when her mom, when her dad died, it was just kind of like she had to deal with it on her own, and so it felt like, to me, when I was reading the book, it felt like she was just raising herself, and so, obviously, that has problems with not knowing how to cope with stuff, and especially seeing your parents not knowing how to cope with things, and seeing her mom just drink when her dad was dying, or when her dad died, and just drink, and go to sleep. She kind of just was like, maybe that's how you cope with things, or get through things, because she saw that with her mom. We can see how it influenced her. Yeah. Because, I mean, if you think about it, she's still, like, a relatively young woman. I mean, she's in her 20s. She's in college. I mean, I couldn't imagine going through anything like that. Mm-hmm. Yeah, and I mean, as a 20-something-year-old myself, I mean, I've always, I always copy what my parents do. I mean, there's some things that I'm like, I'm growing, and I'm like, maybe I shouldn't do that, but there's things that you think your parents do right, and even if you don't, it may not be right, it's like how you were raised, and so you might do it, and you might copy and do that yourself, even when you don't realize that you do it, or feel the same way, or think about things. Yeah. What your parents think also has an influence on you as well, and so if you see your mom sitting here drinking, doing drugs, sleeping, and kind of just acting like her dad's death is no big deal, then, I mean, what are you going to feel like? Yeah, she definitely adapts all of that. Yeah, and another thing that, like, her parents show, especially with permissive parenting, is that things are just, like, thrown out, so, like, important conversations are not being handled in the right way, and so, like, when her mom and her dad were talking about when he had cancer, I think they were, like, packing her up to go to college, and they were just, like, oh, by the way, your dad has cancer. It wasn't something that they sat down and talked about, asked her her feelings, how she felt about it, you know, they didn't, they didn't even say, do you have any questions about, you know, what's going on, how long, like, any details, how long your dad has to live, or they think he has to live, you know what I'm saying? Like, it was just, it was just straight up, by the way, this is just a normal thing, your dad has cancer, he's dying, let's take you to school, and they brought it up in the same sentence of her being safe with sex, and that's just, like. I feel like that just shows that her parents weren't exactly the best at conveying or dealing with their emotions either. Yeah. And you can see that's definitely where she gets it from. I feel like they don't really know how to go about the hard things in life. Yeah, and research shows that parents, kids who have harsh parenting practices over reactive parenting, authoritarian parenting, and permissive parenting can be predictors for internalizing problems when they are older and leading to depression. So, I mean, this is backed up with studies and how this can have a big part of why she has this deep depression in her 20s. Also, the research shows that permissive parenting has predicted unhealthy adolescent eating behaviors, too, and I definitely think the main character shows bad eating behaviors and just behaviors in general. Which is kind of ironic, because I feel like she judges Reva. Oh, yeah, for sure. Because Reva struggles heavily with body dysmorphia and eating disorders, and it's almost like she doesn't even realize that she also has one, too. Mm-hmm. Yeah, she definitely has eating, like an eating disorder, as well. And, like, I mean, she eats at random periods. It's not like she has, okay, well, it's getting lunchtime or it's getting dinnertime and I haven't ate. No, it's like when I wake up from my two-day nap, then it's time for me to eat or to drink my two coffees so I can get a little bit of energy to go back to sleep. So, that's definitely an unhealthy addiction, as well. And she also shows signs of behavior problems, such as self-destruction through overuse of pills that she takes, like Ambien, and having a sexual relationship with someone that's unavailable. And the fact that she knows that he is unavailable. But, I mean, does she really know how to cope with these and to know she's doing wrong if she's only saw her parents, you know, her parents not coping with anything and really not showing her what is right and wrong in life? Yeah, I feel like it definitely affected her negatively. Mm-hmm. Yeah, so another theme or factor with the depression is grief. Kaylee, do you want to touch on grief? Yeah, so we kind of already talked about how her father did have prostate cancer and he eventually did pass away because of the disease. And then we also talked about how her mother didn't have the best coping strategies, either. After her father's death, she kind of just let everything go. She didn't really care much about anything anymore. She just wanted to drink and take pills and eventually she did commit suicide. Exactly what the main character did except for the suicide part. Right. And, I mean, she even left her note. Yeah, and she was like the fourth or fifth person. I can't remember the exact number, but she wasn't even, when it was the goodbye note, I mean, she wasn't even the first person. So it was kind of showing how important the main character is in her mom's life. I mean, she was just another person. I think her barber was on there before she was. It was just crazy. Yeah, so you can imagine what that will do to a young girl. And, I mean, after that, she became an orphan in her early 20s. So you can obviously expect that she did experience grief, which, as human beings, we're all guaranteed to experience at some point in our lives. It's also how you handle it, too. Right. And some people, I mean, everyone can experience grief differently, can handle it differently. I think that she didn't really want to handle it at all. Yeah. I think she had very, like, severe and prolonged symptoms of grief, which I feel like a lot of different things could factor into play why she had such a difficult time. But, I mean, her parents both passed away around the same time in, like, very tragic, very traumatic ways. Mind you, at a very young age. Right. So the brain has not even fully developed at this time. Right. So I think that the narrator kind of relied on negative coping strategies, like avoidance and escapism. Yeah. And she never really dealt with or tried to heal from the trauma of both of her parents dying in the ways that they did. And I think that it just kind of escalated her mental health issues. Yeah. I think that if she would have went to therapy and dealt with it and kind of worked through it, I think when you're reading it, you kind of almost have this impression that she doesn't even care. Well, kind of. I mean, I don't want to sound like... She put it on herself, too. Like, I understand that this is the way she was raised and she can't help that and this is what she thinks is wrong or this is what she thinks is right and because she's seen it through her mom. But if she would have took those right coping steps, like therapy and stuff, who knows what she would have, you know, where she would have been if she would have lost her job, you know, where she would be if she would be a very successful artist or not. And her life may be totally different. Mm hmm. Yeah, I think her grief from her parents, even though she doesn't talk about it, I feel like it's very evident, especially in the part of the book, when Reva's mother dies and she goes to the funeral. Yeah. And not, like, not knowing how to, you know, show comfort to Reva. But, I mean, can you blame her? She never was comforted herself. Yeah, and I think a part of her definitely envied Reva because of the relationship that she had with her mom. The narrator never really got that. And so I think instead of her coming out and saying that she is grieving from her parents, I think we can kind of see it from scenes like those where you can tell it's just very suppressed. Right. I mean, she might not even know that she's grieving from it. Yeah. But it's, I think, very negatively affecting her life. Yeah. Well, I think when you start talking about one of the major things in the book is avoidance and how she copes with and fixes her issue or how she thinks that she's going to fix the issue. So, throughout the book, avoidance is a huge part of the book. Research shows that avoiding something can make you feel in control. Depending on what you're avoiding, it also signifies the true control as well. So, I feel like throughout the book, she tries to control her depression and her feelings and thoughts by avoiding it. And her avoidance is sleeping for an entire year. She believes that sleeping for an entire year will get rid of this depression episode that she's in and her suicidal thoughts will disappear because she's going to be renewed. I think, did she say something like her cells would be renewed? Yeah, by the end of the year, her body will be completely new. Right. Her brain will just be better. Right. Which is a very radical way to go about things. And I think it was honestly a great concept for a book. Yeah, I mean, I don't know if anyone has ever thought about that that way. How sleeping can... Yeah, I mean, I'm sure we've all been like, oh, if I can just sleep, I'll just feel so much better. If I can just stay in bed all weekend. But the fact that she actually committed to it and executed it, even though it was through kind of crooked means, I mean, she made it happen. Yeah, and research shows that when you're confronted with uncomfortable thoughts or situations, you can also use substitutional avoidance as well. So using substances. And I think throughout the book, it's clear that she uses different types of substances to avoid the situation. I mean, she uses the substances to help her sleep and to be tired, but she also uses them just to ignore her thoughts and, you know, be in a different mindset as well. Some of the substances that she uses to help avoid her anxiety and depression is like Ambien and Ativan. These major drugs that have these severe side effects. And she knows these side effects. The doctor tells her, even though the doctor is a little crazy herself, but the doctor tells her, oh yeah, it's gonna be, it's normal to feel like, you know, to wake up and doing all this. Yeah, I feel like the psychiatrist definitely made it possible for her. Oh yeah, definitely. But yeah, throughout the book, she copes and fixes her issue through sleeping and then she really thinks that this is going to fix her problems. And that's just another issue as she's avoiding the problem instead of working on her depression or working on her grief or some upbringing factors and stuff like that that she has to focus on. And so she's just avoiding it and controlling. She feels that she's in control and that she really doesn't go to therapy for help. She goes to therapy to get these medications so she can fix her issues. So she's not seeking out for help at all. She's seeking out for help for sleeping. Yeah, I feel like that just shows like how far she'll actually go to make this happen. I mean, she's going through all these crazy side effects, waking up in random places, spending her money not remembering, having interactions with people, having no idea. I mean, she's losing days and weeks. Yeah. And I mean, the thing is, is she's okay with this. She feels like, well, I mean. Right. And I remember one part of the book she said, I can't remember if it was on Ambien or which medication it was on, but she was waking up and she was going places and she said, this is the opposite of what I wanted to do. I wanted to stay in and now I'm out doing this and that. But she knew all along what these medications can do and she continued to take it. So it's not like she tried to stop taking them. She continued to take it because she knew she wanted to sleep and that medication would help her sleep. Yeah, and she did whatever she had to do. I mean, she at one point in the book has to lock herself into her apartment and have somebody come and, I mean, essentially take care of her because she couldn't even, like, trust herself on these medicines. Didn't she, um, she would online shop in her sleep? Yes, she would online shop. But then, so she started to, um, put her phone in, like, a container and lock her phone up. Yeah, I mean, just going through crazy measures. Yeah, and I mean, the thing is, is if she would have put this energy instead of avoiding the problem. Right, into fixing. Fixing the problem. Turning her life around. I don't think it would have taken a year. Yeah. I mean, yeah, you're gonna still feel, just because, I mean, just because you're solving the problems and working towards it doesn't mean your depression just magically goes away. But, um, I think she would be in a definitely better place if she decided to cope with her feelings and grief and stuff like that in the right way instead of trying to just avoid it overall. And even though she thinks that sleeping isn't avoiding it, that it's helping it, it was still... Yeah, I mean, in her mind, that's, that is her way of dealing with it. But it's still a type of avoidance. Yeah. Um, she's just kind of clueless. She doesn't really know. So, I think another thing we need to talk about is her escapism and how she loved to binge-watch throughout the book. So, her in her apartment loading movies on her VCR and watching them was, I think, a huge portion of this book. She talked about so many of the classic movies, like Dirty Dancing, Working Girl, and she mentions Whoopi Goldberg like a million times, like her idol. And I think it's clear throughout the book that this is just a way for her to escape from her real life through watching movies on her VCR. I read an article that talked about women high in alienation from the self were significantly more likely to be heavy television viewers and that television serves to focus people's attention away from how they're failing to realize their ideal standards. And I think that the narrator took escapism like to the extreme of watching these movies, I think. Yeah, I mean, I, the whole time you were talking, I was just thinking about a VCR and I think it's so funny that they include a VCR and not a DVD in the movie, I mean, in the book, sorry. I don't know if DVDs were, I mean, this was our early 2000s, DVDs were around, so I mean, yeah, I just think it's funny how it's kind of like set in her ways and she's not changing that. But yeah, I definitely think she uses the movies as her only time when she's awake and she does that only, that's the only thing she does when she's awake, eat. Which just shows how far she'll go to escape her life. Yeah. You know, she's sleeping all the time. When she's not sleeping, she's not going out and having a social life. She's sitting on her couch and watching movies that she's seen a million times before. Yeah, and she's really taking on the role of the movies and just listening to their life, listening to their story, and she's not focusing on her life, her story, what's her problem, you know, what issues that she faces. And so it's really her escapism, her escaping her feelings and, you know, just keeping going with focusing on other people's lives and not her own. Even if it is a made-up story that she's watching. Yeah, and you can, I mean, studies have shown that it actually, like, worsens your mental state and, I mean, she's not living her life. Yeah, yeah, I mean she's just focused on doing the bare minimum when she's up. She's not focused on, okay, do I feel remotely any better? Do I, I mean, I think there was a couple times in the book where she was like, she didn't, she felt like she didn't feel any better, but she was like, oh well, the year's not up. But she didn't take the time to focus and say, okay, and reflect. And if she really thought that sleeping was going to make her better, then I feel like she needed to reflect during that time and saying, okay, do I feel any better? Do I not feel better? But she decided to take that time and to ignore her feelings, ignore what she was, you know, her depression and all the grief that she has dealt with and just focus on other people's lives and basically jumping into that life, you know, and really acting like, to me, watching that many movies over and over and over again, it's kind of like you're taking on that role of that movie as well. Yeah, and honestly, I think at some level we can all relate to that experience. Yeah. Binge-watching as a way of distraction or binge-watching, I mean, you hear all the time when girls are going through their breakups, they, you know, they're binge-watching movies. I mean, it's a good form of escapism. Yeah. It just, you know, in moderation. Yeah, yeah, I definitely think binge-watching is very popular now with Netflix, especially. Oh yeah? Binge-watching is the thing and it's like, it's even better to binge-watch something than it is to just watch an episode here and there. It's like, no, I want to watch an episode and I want to watch the next one right after so I know exactly what happens. There's no patience there. But with that being said, she doesn't take time to watch movies but also do other things. It's solely just the movies, just eating, getting her coffee, and watching movies. It's nothing else and so I think that's definitely very interesting. That's definitely, it's an interesting take on how to escape your grief and your feelings as well. So I definitely feel like we should talk about how the depression affects social life, her social life as well, and go more about talking about Rita because she's a main, she's a big part of the book as well. Yeah, definitely. Yeah. So research also shows that further depressed people typically view social interactions as negative. They have negative outcomes to themselves and act in accord with expectations to negative social interactions as well and I think she does that, that exact thing throughout the book. Every single interaction with other people is negative, especially with Reva. I mean, first off, she doesn't want even Reva over there. So when Reva comes and talks about her feelings or anything about her mom dying from cancer, it's always, it's always, well here she goes again, you know, and she's all like, she doesn't feel any sympathy for Reva at all and so she, I remember one part of the book, she had this careless attitude and she looked at Reva when, when Reva was talking about her mother and said, just don't be a spaz. Yeah, just don't be a spaz. Another example of how the main character shows a stronger reaction towards social interactions in a negative way is when she tells her, when Reva tells that her mother is dying from cancer instead of a normal reaction, it was just very negative with a, don't be a spaz, but also that, how she acted when they were at Reva's mother's funeral as well or when they were at Reva's house and how she didn't have any sympathy or didn't feel for Reva. She was basically very self-centered and she said, go get me the clothes from your mom, your dead mom's closet or I'm not going to the funeral. It was very, she was very selfish with it. It was about her and only her and she took that and she put it in a negative light and she basically told her like, look if you don't do what I'm saying then I'm just not going to go in general. Yeah, I think we can see just how self-centered and egotistical she is through her relationships and I guess like scenes in the book when she's with other people. To her it's almost like everyone's so much more stupid than me. Everyone is like just kind of below me which is interesting because she doesn't seem to have much confidence when she's trying to sleep her life away but yeah I think through all those scenes we got we can just tell that she's very self-centered. Makes everything about me, me, me, especially at the funeral. Yeah and research also shows that depressed people report fewer intimate relationships and she doesn't, I mean let's go to her and Trevor, her ex-boyfriend. There was no intimate relationship with dad at a serious level. It was just this is my sexual partner, this is my sex buddy and that's all it was. And it was very almost degrading. Yeah. And she, it was like she didn't even care. Mm-hmm. She didn't have that like value for herself and respect for herself. Right. I definitely felt like she was just like I'm always sleeping all the time. Trevor's gonna come over, give me a little bit of pleasure and he's gonna leave. It wasn't, it was just for her and her only. It wasn't to grow a relationship to or to be someone to help her get out of this issue either. She never let someone open and come in and help her either. I mean I feel like that goes back to her parents as well. Like she doesn't know how to let people comfort her or to ask for help and she's kind of used to just kind of being dealing with it on her own. Yeah and she's always felt like well and she to me reading the book it always felt like well if my parents aren't even gonna listen to me and help me and comfort me then why would Trevor or Reva? Even though Reva cries so many times. I feel like that's why she has a more negative reaction to Reva than for Trevor and Reva's the one who's actually trying to help her. I think that's because she doesn't know how to go about someone actually caring for her. Yeah. And trying to help her like go through things. Yeah. So I mean do you feel like you have any personal connections with any of the themes in the book? Like depression affecting the social life, escapism, avoidance, grief or maybe your upbringing factors and how it might affect you. Yeah I feel like I can definitely connect with the narrator's kind of habit of escaping I guess unpleasant situations. Yeah. I know for me personally my favorite form is to read. I like to just dive into a book and just act like that's my life for a little bit and act like I'm and just be in that world instead of my reality for a little bit. Which I feel like it might not be the healthiest thing. Right. But again she does do it at an exaggerated amount. Right. So you like to dive more into other people's stories throughout books. Right. Instead of maybe focusing on what you're feeling. Right. I just prefer fiction over my reality sometimes. Yeah. Well I feel like I focus or I relate to her avoidance because I avoid my feelings as well or like my depression and depressive feelings that I may have and I do it through schoolwork. I know that sounds so like but I do it through schoolwork. It's like I focus on I have to get this done. I have this to do instead of maybe taking time to just focus on myself and focusing on how I can better myself or help this feeling that I may be having. I just focus straight on this is due. I don't have time to cry. I don't have time to feel sorry for myself. I don't have time to fix this problem. It's just schoolwork and I mean yes we me and the main character both experience avoidance but we do it in different ways. Yeah I mean I feel like your avoidance is I mean productive. Yeah. You might be avoiding your emotions. Yeah. I mean you're getting stuff done at the end of the day. It's still a problem. She's not getting anything done. Yeah it's still a problem but it's definitely the exact opposite. Now that we've talked about our personal connections with it I really think we need to talk about how she shows all these themes and how all of the symptoms or signs of depression she really is nailing right on the head and she's really showing these signs of depression. So going back to how depression can present itself in women and we look at the signs and symptoms of it we can see all that throughout the book. I mean the book might not come right out and say our narrator has depression and she's trying to find her own way of dealing with it. We can see it through her family history, the grief that she experienced at a young age, her habits of avoidance and escapism and how you can see it reflecting through her social life and I feel like with all of these together I mean it's obvious that she's going through that. Right it's just very exaggerated. It's not that she doesn't show signs of depression and she's I mean she's checking off every single box. Right. The upbringing, the avoidance, the escapism, the social life, grief, she's checking off every single box. It's just the book is doing it it's very exaggerated which is the point of the book. I definitely think the whole point of the book is to show the exaggeration in it and who knows there might be people out here that really have the opportunity to sleep for an entire year. It must be nice to just have money coming in and to sleep. It's not nice to have depression but it's nice to just not be able to work and just have money come in and she's definitely privileged. But yeah I mean I think we wrapped up everything about that we want to talk about the book and I really did like the book. I like the spicy scenes in it. It really just made me want to keep on going and reading it and so I really thought it was so bizarre. It's like oh yeah trying to look away from a train wreck. You just can't. You have to keep reading. You have to keep reading and I definitely would recommend people reading this book. The author did a great job of taking a mental illness and putting it in a whole different light. And kind of making this main character just a 20 year old girl in New York. She's kind of encompassing all these very bizarre qualities but I mean to some level we all might possess. Yeah so so I would definitely I mean do you recommend for people to read the book? Yeah I think y'all should go out read this book. Let us know what you think too. Thanks for tuning in to Book Nook with Peyton and Kaylee and we'll see you next time. Bye.