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Q5-19870718-Larry_Rosenberg-UNK-reflections_on_the_buddhas_fire_sermon_part_ii-1545 Leandra Tejedor
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Talk: 19870718-Larry_Rosenberg-UNK-reflections_on_the_buddhas_fire_sermon_part_ii-1545 Leandra Tejedor (1) Start_time: 59:18 Display_question: I would like to share about how attachment showed up in my practice. Keyword_search: forest fire, lunch, continuity, phone call, Vermont, letting go, awareness, selfing, feelings, unpleasant, me and mine, suffering, self-centeredness, pudding, sutra, Buddha, birth of the I, sleep, dream, Mother Nature, conditions, practice Question_content: I would like to share about how attachment showed up in my practice. I felt like I was in the forest fire. Larry: You were a forest fire. What happened? Questioner: I had to place two telephone calls… today and decided that the best time for me to do that, would be after lunch, because I felt that there was that time, that was really to myself, and I thought that I could maintain continuity, even though I had to get on the phone. So, one phone call was placed, in order to make the second call, because I had to charge it. And the response I got from the first phone call was not what I thought I wanted, and I was ablaze with that. Then the second phone call was in preparation for going, and visiting someone tomorrow. Break_line: Well, I first found out that half my motivation for going to this wonderful restaurant that had this great (inaudible) dish, they went out of business, to Vermont. And then I found out that the person, who I thought was going to be there, as it turned out, was not there. So, I thought oh, okay. That's fine. You know, I can deal with that. And as it turned out, I spent one whole sitting going, God I feel so horrible, why do I feel this way? I know I've encountered different branches, but I think that it's fine if they're not going to happen, the way I thought they were going to happen. But I was still one level away, from really letting go of it. And what I thought I would let go of, I didn't. And it just became so complex in my mind, that it took some real awareness to let go of it. Larry: Did it eventually pass? Questioner: Yeah, it was horrible. Larry: In that situation, it's very helpful, to stay in touch with the feelings, the unpleasant feelings, and to really experience them. Also, in all of these really, is to notice if selfing, is happening. That is, if the I gets into it. That is, granted something's happening to each one of us, in these, and then it makes it into, I am not having my pudding, then you have a real problem. And so, quite related to what this is all about is to be… more, and more, be able to see the way in which selfing happens. The way in which that I enters into the situation, and claims it, as being mine. This is me, and this is mine. And if awareness accompanies the arising, or the birth of those of the I, in the mind, there's either no suffering, or very little. If there's no awareness, then that is really controlling the situation a great deal, because we're taking it incredibly personally. I mean that's the suffering that we do so much, is this… self-centeredness in everything, that so many things that are happening to us, fortunately not everything. We have our moments when we let it go. Questioner: Yeah, that's real true for me, because the moment I realized there was no pudding was like, well, there's no pudding. But then I turned around, and I thought, it's guy. That…then I started taking personally, well, isn't he aware that I didn't get any and… Larry: Right Questioner: On all these things. Larry: Yeah Questioner: You know, and your…that’s...I saw that in action today. Larry: Okay, in the sutra, the Buddha, if you remember, says that birth is suffering. Does some of you remember that? He said birth is suffering. On one level, that means the physical act of being born, is painful. There's another meaning of it, an inner meaning, more subtle meaning, let's say. What the Buddha is talking about is, the birth of the I. From every time the I is born, there’s suffering. And the I is born, and dies many many times during a day. And there are also periods of time when there's no…the I is in abeyance. And those are often our happiest times. One of which, we get almost every night, when we go to sleep. Not the dream part, because the I is going crazy there, often. It's still I, just without a body. But we get into periods of dreamless sleep, where there's no thinking, which means there's no thought I. And if there's no thought I, thanks to the benevolence of Mother Nature, there's no suffering. At least we have a few hours a night when there’s…the I is laid to rest, and there's no suffering. And then if dreams start in, it starts all over again. Break_line: And so where… that's part of what's being said here, because that's what gets inflamed so much. So, can we begin to see this process at work, right in life itself. In the ordinary situations, and conditions, that make up our life? That's what I would encourage you to see, as a very important part of your practice. End_time: 01:04:26
