The KittyCrinkle Show Ep.2 KittyCrinkle Becomes Black (Re-upload)

OK, Kittycrinkle, today we'll be going to the movie theater. Yeah, I know. You've told me like a thousand times. By the way, what's no sotras vamos al maldito cine? I have to tell you all the regulations of going to a movie theater. Come on. I'll be... Hey, guys. Hey, Katie. So how was your day? Ugh. Don't ask. Just another day of bagging groceries and wiping more porn off the library's computers. Oh, that must be me. I've been spending more time at the library. Maybe watching some CP? Yeah. Thanks for all the work. Anyway, what I was saying earlier, I got this. I won't yell at the movie theater. You promise? I promise. Stop singing. Stop singing. Stop singing. Stop singing. It's a musical. They're supposed to sing. Oh, well, stop being a musical. Stop being a musical. Stop being a musical. Stop being a musical. Stop being a musical. Stop being a musical. Stop being a musical. Stop being a musical. Stop being a musical. Stop being a musical. Stop being a musical. Stop being a musical. Stop being a musical. Stop being a musical. Stop being a musical. Stop being a musical. Stop being a musical. Stop being a musical. Stop being a musical. Stop being a musical. You know the guy in the movie who played basketball although he was white and not black? Yeah. Lots of white people play basketball. Wow, really? Good to know. Aw, crap. It's my boss. I have to be at work. See you later. O.K. See ya. Oh, by the way, there's a magnet stuck to your ass. Aw, son of a bitch. Hey, Jordan, is Katie here? No. Right now she's at the dentist. Oh, thank God. She'd probably keep talking about how she has to wipe porn off the library computer for volunteer work. Yeah. She talks my ass off about that, too. What are you doing? I'm looking through old DVDs. Oh, my God. Mission Impossible I. This is my brother's favorite movie, so I hate it. Oh, my God. Are those porn DVDs? Oh, they are. Cool. We can go sell them. No, not cool. These are illegal. You could go to jail for these. With all the money, you could finally turn your house into that model area. Screw what I said. Let's go sell some porn. O.K., Kitty Crinkle, today I have a very difficult job for you. Oh, God, what is it? What is it? You have to give out all the ice cream. And what's so difficult about that? You're a celebrity. Won't your hands hurt? Uh, no. I think I'll be fine. O.K., let me know when your hands get tired. Boss, can I ask you something? Sure thing, Kitty Crinkle. Do you have to be black to play basketball? Oh, God, that's a difficult one. Uh, I'd say you're good at basketball, Kitty Crinkle. Whether black or white, you are the ultimate basketball champion. Thanks, but I know you're just saying that to make me feel better. Bitch-ass trigger. Hey, you. Oh, hi. Are you here to buy ice cream? No, I came here to tell you that you're pathetic and you'll never be good at basketball, so you should kill yourself. Thanks, big fan. Also, you have a magnet stuck to your ass, by the way. Oh, seriously? Free porn, everybody. Free porn, everybody. Where do you get these, anyway? Oh, they're from a little website they like to call PornHub. Is that Kitty Crinkle? Why does he have a magnet stuck to his ass? Hey, you. Do you watch porn? No. Well, this is your chance to finally watch some of those sweet old inappropriate sex tapes. So what do you say? No, thanks. I heard porn is very bad for you. No, wait. I have all sorts of porn. Regular porn. Gay porn. Child porn. Jordan, we should just give this up. Nobody's gonna buy our illegal porn DVDs. Hey, I heard you guys are selling illegal porn DVDs. He looks like somebody to me, Michelle. Heck! We have plenty. Oh, wait. Crap. We only have two. That's fine. I'll take one of your illegal porn DVDs. Only $50. Here you go. Thanks. And, hey, feel free to talk about us the next time you post on PornHub. Just saying. See, Michelle, we got our first sale. I guess so, but what we're doing is still wrong. Yeah, whatever. We've got one more to sell, so let's do it. Heck, fine. Oh, my God. Is that the porn fairy? Hi, Katie. Oh, hey. How's it going, Kitty Crinkle? Hey, I've been thinking about something recently. Something really important. I'm not sure if you'd understand. Of course I'd understand. You can tell me anything, Kitty Crinkle. How much are the burgers at Wendy's? $5. Buy one, get two free. Thanks, but I've been thinking about something else. Ever since I saw the Piece of Crap Adam Sandler movie, I've wanted to be good at basketball. Katie, I want to become black. I saw the Piece of Crap Adam Sandler movie. I've wanted to be good at basketball. Katie, I want to become black. Kitty Crinkle, you can't become black. What? Why not? It's a very serious risk, and other than that, I really don't know. I have to be good at basketball. I'm Kitty Crinkle. I should be good at everything. I get that you're Kitty Crinkles, but that doesn't mean you're good at everything. Exactly. That's why I want to be black. I will rule at basketball, and I will make all the other white players eat my poop when I win. O.K., Kitty Crinkles, if you really wanna be black, I'll see a way to make your dream a reality. Thanks. You're welcome. Oh, by the way, you have a magnet stuck to your ass. Damn it. Get off my ass, you son of a bitch. Porn DVDs. Porn DVDs. Get your porn DVDs. Look, Jordan, I got the DVD to Twilight Zone the movie. It's my brother's favorite movie, so I hate it. My brother hates the show, so I like it. Oh, cool. It has the same DVD cover as the illegal porn DVD. Cool. Well, sell it. I don't want it. Oh, by the way, watch out for that fat guy over there. Hello. I was wondering if you have any movie DVDs for my family movie night. Actually, yeah. I have a copy of Twilight Zone the movie. Oh, I love that movie. But that's mostly because my sister despises it. How much? Only $56. Here you go. Oh, man, when my sister sees I have the DVD, she's gonna be so pissed. Hey, Jordan, did you sell the porn DVD? Nope, but I did sell that Twilight Zone movie DVD. Oh, cool. To who? I sold it to Officer Braxton. Cool. And are you sure you didn't sell it to Officer Braxton? I'm very sure. I'll prove it to you by showing you the disc. Um, why is the disc for Twilight Zone the movie and the disc for the illegal porn DVDs? What the hell are why? Oh, my God. I sold him the illegal porn DVDs. We gotta get it back or we're gonna go to jail forever. You think? You just sold an illegal porn DVD to a police officer. Are you ready to follow through with this, Kitty Crinkle? Well, I am feeling a little bit queasy, but that might be the 20 tacos I had earlier. What do you want? Okay, I can easily tell you don't like me. Of course I don't like you, I don't like anybody, I don't even like my mom. I only like Kitty Crinkle. Why do you sound like Hitler? Because I evolved from him, like Hitler. Anyway, I need your help. I want to be black. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Okay, I'm guessing you don't want to turn me black. Of course I want to turn you black. I was just laughing because I can. Makes sense, right? Whoa. Your voice changed. Commence the transformation. Whoa. The transformation is complete, but there are some side effects. You will have a Nigerian accent and you will find yourself saying the word nigger a lot. Nigger what? Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Great, you're finished. Now get the hell out of here. I need to find a place to hide from my wife. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Nigger, I'm up big. That's great, Kitty Crinkle. Now, please try not to screw this up. Nigger, this nigger be crazy. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Do you know where he lives, Yarden? Of course I do. Where does he live? Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Oh, my gosh. He's coming. Hide. Now where do I live again? Oh, I live there. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Oh, boy. I can't wait to call my sister and tell her I have a DVD of her least favorite movie. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! What the hell was that? Oh, my God. Why'd you do that? Must be the damn radio. We have to get into that house and get that DVD. Do you know anyone that can help us break in? Of course I do. So who's someone that can help us to break in? Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Nigger, today was the best day ever. I beat out 50,000 white people, and the coach smiled at me. The coach never smiles. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! That's great, Kitty Crinkles, but the truth is I've been worried about you. Nigger, why would you be worried about me? There's literally nothing to be worried about. I don't know if you realize this, but this could lead to some very serious consequences, like you might be fully Nigerian, and once you're black forever, you could never turn back. Nigger, that's never gonna happen to me. Listen, just come to me games and then you'll see. Uh, okay. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Nigger, see, my life is great. I guess so, but what if you become a slave? Nigger, I won't become a slave. Just trust me. Just be careful, okay? I hope you enjoy a life without me. Aw! Nigger, whatever. I'm gonna be a pro basketball player. They said they were gonna need slaves to whip. What a minute. They said I'd be a great slave. Oh, my God, they're gonna take me as a slave. Well, hello, Kitty Crinkle. Are you ready to go into the secret room? Nigger, save it. I know you just want to make me a slave. And by the way, I know the secret room is just a candy warehouse. Come on, Kitty Crinkle, please go with us. Nigger, no, you know why. Because what you're doing is wrong. You can't just make your players black. In fact, why do you think LeBron James or Michael Jordan became famous? Because although they're black, they once made slaves. You know what? Fine. We won't make you a slave, but you will be black forever. Okay, now we're in his house. Man, look at that picture of that sexy woman. Pretty sure that's his wife. Oh, my God, there he is. Hide. Yes, sister, and I got the DVD for the Twilight Zone movie. Yes, feel free to be pissed. Yes, feel free to be pissed. Damn, so much for brotherly love. What was that? I'll call you back, sis. Must be my head talking to me. Oh, look, the family's home. It's time to watch the movie. Okay, guys, are you ready for a masterpiece? I guess so. Okay. Twilight Zone the movie starts now. Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God,