Day 2 of Going to Therapy: The Talking apart

The person is about to go to their first therapy appointment. They explain that therapy has two parts: medication and talking to a professional. They had a positive experience with the doctor during their medical appointment and received a prescription. They mention their skepticism about the medication but will provide more information later. They are looking forward to their therapy appointment because they want to work on fixing their issues, including moderate to severe PTSD and anxiety. They also mention getting angry easily and wanting to change that behavior. They are excited to have this opportunity for personal growth. They mention participating in monthly self-care activities and wondering how often they should shower. They talk about their expired identification documents and not having a bank account. They mention working as a subcontractor in writing and photography. They have a photography gig but cannot cash the check without active identification. They plan to ask for c Hey guys so catching up I am just about to go into my first actual appointment to see a therapist. My first audio was me going to my first medical appointment with a therapist so from my understanding therapy is two parts. There's the medical there's the medicine part where you can take medication obviously and there's the therapy part where you actually sit down and talk to a professional. I was open to both although originally I was just open to just therapy but after coming out from the medical appointment I was able to actually connect a lot with a doctor and what's actually great about being an adult is like when you're kind of roughly around the same age it's almost like you guys communicate on the same level so I was able to actually just be very transparent. I'm at that level where it's like I'm just trying to get fixed so I was able to tell him about my situation. He prescribed the medication for me that I do have to pick up and then once I pick it up and do some research on it on my own I'll give you more of what was described but he basically told me it's like the first one or the generic one so I don't know obviously I do have my skepticism on it but I'll give you more of that rundown when I pick up a medication and I know exactly what I'm talking about but right now I'm actually ready. I'm about to leave for my appointment to talk to my therapist for the first time and I am actually kind of looking forward to it just because like I said this is actually the first time in my life that I'm taking the time to actually get fixed and I feel like being at my 30s like right there on Jesus's age like it's just it's a good time for just a new awakening just because I know who I am it's just knowing just how do I present myself in the best light sometimes because sometimes like I said I did get diagnosed with with moderate to severe PTSD with anxiety sometimes I can just get angry or just irritated at someone that I don't know don't know anything about and it's not even something aggressive but sometimes it just be triggering of just seeing something that I don't like and then it just feels like it's just a war that is just about to go on so I didn't want to keep feeling that way because even as a child being angry I always had like so to say violent thoughts and in reality when it comes to for example watching movies my vibe is comedy like I'm not an action movie I'm not a thriller I'm not a suspense I'm not a drama I'm not horror I'm more of just comedy and happy endings that's normally me that's actually my vibe that I that I know that that's what I like to give off of so yeah this person apparently she is an expert in trauma so hopefully we get a lot done in an hour but these are going to be weekly appointments and I'm going to be seeing her and I'm also going to be participating in these monthly activities that they have going on since I'm on Medi-Tel for the first time I can actually qualify and these little fun activities where they do like self-care classes which I think kind of straightforward but I'll be honest with you they'll be weeks when I'll only take a shower once and it means I kind of raise the question well how often should I shower obviously you know one's mother would say every day but sometimes you don't feel like touching the water which is such an odd thing to say but yeah it's just sometimes you at least what I can relate on this experience that sometimes I feel you get knocked out so hard and even when you're picking yourself up you don't know what to pick up first or what is it to pick up like right now currently situation that I'm dealing with is I I basically have an expired driver's license passport and I don't have a bank and before the pandemic I basically I I quit my employment just for the sheer reason of health but I did not have a true I focused my financial resources more on personal matters versus the actual financial matters which is a burden when you know too much about finance because in reality money is not worth anything and reality debt collectors just will just buy off your debt for pennies on the dollar that you can let her negotiate and even if things were to go that bad you can always just bust a Donald Trump which I know it sounds very bad to say but I'm just saying he did write a good playbook on it so yeah about that and went off tangent so yeah I don't have a bank and even though I did just start working as a subcontractor can I do writing on business and finance but during the time of being in COVID I did a foolish thing of using some of my stimulus check to actually just get a course of photography and I started just kind of doing photography as well just kind of just be more my creative side and I ended up getting this gig of taking pictures for these high school kids for picture day but right now I'm not able to cash in that check because I have no form of active identification and I have no bank to give it to so I'm gonna have to give up the courage and basically go and tell that contractor that I'm working with I'm just building a relationship with to say hey if you could just pay me in cash I mean I did tell them that my ID was expired but I mean my social security card is active so yeah I'm at that hurdle point but I don't know I'm probably gonna ask the services to see what they can do they can help me in any way of that nature but yeah that's where we're at and I'll be going to therapy shortly so thank you for being here thank you for being part of my journey and if you are going through this I hope my story helps you develop yourself even more into the process and if there's anything I can share it was watching someone else talk about their therapy even though it was light-hearted when they mentioned they didn't they weren't transparent fully about their drug use and everything of that nature I was like you know what I'm just gonna let it all out because I don't want to hold back and then have to come back you know so that's the one thing I did want to leave off if you're going through the process just be transparent because right now from my understanding is like as long as you're not trying or hurt yourself I want to hurt someone they're not gonna do anything or involve anything so and one benefit I mean California is super lenient so it's like might as well take the benefits right now because I feel a lot of people just do need that mental help so that way we can all get along and be kinder to together but in reality I feel like a lot of what we see is like hurt people hurt people so yeah if you're feeling hurt just go get help yeah that's mine have a good day bye bye