La and Ashley Pt1- Self Esteem-iTGirl

Say it nicely, she's my favorite girl, you know I love her, my favorite girl Say it nicely, she's my favorite girl, you know I love her, my favorite girl Say it nicely, say it nicely, say it nicely, say it nicely, say it nicely My favorite girl Beautiful, I just want you to know, you're my favorite girl Beautiful, I just want you to know, you're my favorite girl Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm Okay. I was gonna say, y'all, new setup. That's just what I was hearing you say, right? New setup, how y'all feel? Let us know. My favorite girl, La and Ashley, my favorite girl. So, that's us. That's our new look for our background. We're excited. We're making some good changes. We hope to keep getting better. Yes, yes, yes. But, as you know, we're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. 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We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. We're doing a lot of work. Boy, oh boy, can a husband ruin my day. Boy, oh boy, can a friend ruin my day. Can a mom ruin my day. Can a mom ruin my day. You know, and I think we don't really address it enough because your inner circle is very critical in the whole dynamics of the three opinions. And your peer groups, they surround, they're the circle around you from the public. Because when the public maybe puts out something negative about a person, that inner circle becomes very crucial. And so when people bypass the inner circle and just try to go straight to the public looking for that security or looking for that acceptance and they don't get it, they get rejected, then they start feeling bad about themselves. And I feel like I've been at a place where it was just hard for me to find where I fit in and I eventually went outward and got different types of friends and was in different environments because I was some good, some bad. It just took me to a lower place because then you get these friends that really aren't your friends and you put up with so much and you get into these relationships and you put up with things that you just really thought you would never put up with. And then you're just a doormat and then you start feeling more bad about yourself. So if I didn't have low self-esteem before, sure haven't now. And even like me still to this day, I feel like I struggle with low self-esteem. I don't feel pretty enough sometimes. I don't feel slim enough. Trying to lose some weight. But you're confident because you don't let that stop you from dressing how you want to. Some days, it stops me. But other days, I don't care. There was a post and it was like, y'all still, all these summer bodies, y'all chose food over these summer bodies and y'all still wearing a hat shirt? I am! Thank you. Still don't have your arms out? Sure have. Thank you. But I think that's where that balance coming at because at the end of the day, your personal opinion should not be lesser and other people's opinion greater. And that's what it said here that low self-esteem is someone who's feeling inferior and they have difficulty making decisions and they depend excessively on the approval of others because they lack confidence. And we don't want to find ourselves in a place struggling to like who we are because of what others think about us. And I get why people take a break from social media because social media will really have you feeling bad about yourself. It'll really have you like, dang, I don't look like this. I don't look like her. I look like me. And you know, oh, if blah, blah, blah can get cheated on, what makes me so special because I look like this and I don't look like that. And like I said, I feel like even as women, we just go through that point where we just don't feel our best. And if you're in a relationship and you know, your partner might say the wrong thing that day and it just triggers you. So where it's like you just go into your little hole, you know, and to this day, like I don't have the answers, you know, I don't, I haven't found a way to cope with it. And if I'm being honest, like I feel like I'm perceived as a very confident person. I feel like I'm perceived as like, oh, she, she, you know, she don't never feel bad about herself. I have plenty of days where I do not feel my best, you know, but I feel like I try. I guess sometimes I try and make up for it when I am feeling my best or I get dressed so I do feel my best. And I feel like sometimes that's just what you have to do. You just have to get out and look your best. That's right. Because if you lie there and you sulk in it, then it can take you over into other areas, you know. And you just never want to find yourself in a place where you don't talk about it. And I think that's what we're doing right now. That's the first step because you were like, you don't, you don't have the answers. And the answer is to have someone in your circle that you can confide in that won't judge you, that won't put you down, make you feel bad. Will listen to you. Will hear what you have to say, you know. And we're not going to skip over you, Miss Lady. I have to beg her to let me. Fix myself up. Fix herself up. Like, let me not you. I mean, I'm like, look, stop by me because this one likes to spend on other things. You know, my hair, she's over wardrobe. So she has to make sure that when we come live, that I'm looking my best. Because you won't do it if I don't. Yeah, I came home when I wore to work. She said, you're not wearing that. And absolutely, I'm not wearing what I wore to work. I didn't buy you new cute clothes for you to wear the same stuff. No, you are going to be out here looking your best because you are a reflection of me. Absolutely. Now, now, I just want to share this. Now we're talking about being authentic. And so I actually went through a period where I didn't know it, but I was so focused on my outward that I was losing who I was inwardly. And when I had an experience that showed that to me, I was determined not to lose myself. So I started working more on my inner person and stopped wearing the makeup, the hair, you know, I just went plain Jane. Like a mom used to be flat. OK, I'll be close to throwback pictures. And I'm like, where is this lady? So I have meet you all the time. Yes, I didn't just. Oh, let me be cute now. No, I think you like I've been getting my hair done. Granny started taking her to get her nails done at maybe six or seven. And I couldn't believe it because I couldn't wear. I was too young and I wasn't old enough. And here I come having my little princess. And next thing I know, she's at the nail shop with my mom getting her nails polished. And I was like, Mom, what is this? She's like, Oh, daughter, she has to look. She has to look cute. So she has been pretty. She's still pretty. She's never lost. I don't want outdoors. I don't want to play outside. I mean, I'm inside drinking my lemonade with my dog. Yes, she is. Yes, she is. Her her large doll collection. No. And Rick Fawley. I need to get back to that little girl that just knew I was so pretty and so cute. Letting these ragamuffins change my perception about me. Ragamuffins, that's what we gonna call them. We're not going to call them what you know I want to call them. That's another good point about your peers. Because your peer circle, your inner circle, is supposed to be honest with you. And if everybody in your peer group is saying that your attitude is kind of stupid, then maybe it's something that you should say, OK, well, let me let me look at myself versus saying, Oh, well, this is how I am and I ain't changing. I feel like nowadays people are just friends and not really being honest with the other friend. Like, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I feel like nowadays people are just friends and not really being honest with the other friend. Like, I need genuine friendships to where if I say this to you, you're not going to take it as me hating on you or me being jealous of you or like a like a jab. Right. So I'm going to tell you before a stranger tells you. You know, and I feel like this generation, they don't like hearing about themselves. Like I have, you know, I have I feel like I have honest friends now that will tell me like, hey, you got a booger in your nose. I'm not going to throw no type away. Right. I don't throw no type away about that. Anyway, thank you for telling me. Thank you. Thank you. You're offering me gum. Perfect. You know, but I feel like there's a lot of people that want you to lie and they want you to like feed into it. And I think that's why some of my friendships did not work out, because I can't sit here and lie and be like, what you're doing is OK. Yeah. You know, and I have this this one specific friend. She knows she is. She's going to tell me when I'm wrong. She's going to say, friend, you know, you should have did that. I'm going to roll my eyes. But I'm going to listen. And everybody needs one of them. And you're another one. But wait a minute. She is, too. There was someone that I was speaking to. She was talking to her boo thing or whatever translation for my generation. Oh, God. And which one? Yeah. Yeah. Which one? You know what? I thought you were talking about the one you like. Leave that alone. We're not going to bring him online. No, we're not. She told me. Y'all would have told her the same thing. Like, what are you doing? OK, we're not. Find yourself. This is not it. What's going on? Still coming up to her job, apparently. Let me know. OK, we ain't going to put the business. Yes. Yes. She was definitely alone. She will let me know when. Very under her. Very. We're not going to do that. God, we're not going to date under our. We're not going to do that. Not that. No, that's how I said that. Sorry. Let's move on. I see the same thing. No, I don't like them. She will. She will. She's not for you. But I think that's good because people would rather believe a lie than they hear the truth. And that's what mess a lot of people up. Because what happens is when the truth come out. Now they feel all terrible because they stayed in something that was a lie or they believed a lie. And I'm not going to front like I've never done that. Like I've never stated something that I knew wasn't going to work. Or the self-esteem coming out. The low self-esteem coming out. It's better than nothing. Or I don't have anybody else. Oh, he just keeps me company. Oh, I don't have any other friends. Like who am I going to hang out with now? Who am I going to talk to? Like not wanting to be by myself. If I don't have you, who do I have? Myself. You're left with yourself. And some people. Oh, some people can't be by themselves. The thought of just being with them is frightening. Because then you have to face you. Face you. You don't want to face you. You don't want to face yourself. When I would go out to eat by myself. Oh God, that's so weird. That's so weird. Did I tell you I tried it? Did you? What did you think? I hated it. Listen, okay. I'm single. So I'm like, I don't have to sit around waiting for someone to take me out. I'll take myself out. I work hard enough. I'll go out to eat at my favorite restaurant. Red Robin. Fun fact. Not really fun. This lady has eaten the same burger from Red Robin for 10 years. You're changing the subject, ma'am. She goes to Red Robin. This has to be fake. This made me upset. This lady made me take her to Red Robin for her birthday. And she just went a day or two before that. For me to now realize in 2023 that this woman gets the same burger each time she goes. That is ridiculous. I have been to Red Robin not as many times as her. But I go because I love this woman. And she just loves this burger place. Red Robin, please sponsor her. Because she faithfully goes there to get one sandwich each time. How do you go and get more sandwiches? I have not tried anything. I've tried the chicken sandwich. I've tried the barbecue sandwich. I've tried at least five different things. And this woman gets the same cheese. Bacon cheeseburger. And onion rings. And it was fine. With her strawberry lemonade. Or her root beer. It's the truth. It's the truth. I know we're going to have to edit some of this out. It's crazy how she has gone to this restaurant and eaten one sandwich. Nobody else is to take this woman to Red Robin until she tries something new. You get that BFF? You get that brother and sister. And sister and mother. And family. Stop taking her to Red Robin to eat the same. I'm not taking you there unless you promise to try something new. I'm not joking. Every Christmas she gets me a Red Robin. Not no more. And then our auntie buys her it too. For her to get the same sandwich. Auntie, stop. No more. You have to try something new. It's literally been ten years. I'm not exaggerating. It's been like ten plus years. Yeah. The same sandwich? Oh my God. It always tastes brand new. Red Robin, you got some special sauce for sure. Sales go up. Sales go up. I feel like overall, through all of my shenanigans, I could have turned out worse. I agree. I thank God for you all the time. I thank God for you as well. I thank God. Because there are a lot of people who are in situations that are far worse. And they're stuck. And at least I feel that if it is a difficult situation, at least have somebody that's willing to work at helping it get better. When you have that backed by gold. When two people are willing to work through the differences. And it's a challenge. It's a challenge. But it's the only way to grow and develop properly. To have good self-esteem. And we're going to talk about that next time on our healthy episode. But as for now, we have discussed all the low self-esteem. And the high and mighty. And they ugly. Like I said, I know a few. And it's really a shame. It's a shame. And we don't want to be classed as that. So we're just putting the word out there and you can share it. You know what? One more thing, I'm sorry. But some people. And some people with low self-esteem will kind of use the excuse of. Well, I don't want to make it seem like I'm just overly beautiful. Or I don't want it to be like I'm having higher self-esteem than I should. So you start kind of like. I guess because I've just done it. Where it's just like, well, I don't want to say I'm beautiful. And like be looked at as vain. So I'll say I'm okay. Or you have those people where you'll say you're okay. Just for somebody to be like, no, you're beautiful. That validation. And I've been there before too. Okay, I'll put myself down and see if they'll put me back up. And it's really just not healthy. And then when they don't, it's like. It's a shame. I knew it. I knew it. This is fine. For real, I used to do that too. They're agreeing with me. Oh my God. It's the truth. Asking for it through wrong people. Of course, you know, some people really do want you to feel like that. So that you don't go nowhere. Let me make sure she knows she ugly so that she don't go nowhere. You ain't going to have nobody. Nobody else going to want you. Now, you know, there's a lot of young ladies in relationships like that. Oh, to my age. Ridiculous. Yeah, they're in those kind of relationships where they feel stuck. Like they can't leave. Because they don't have the confidence to leave. Or, like I said earlier, you know, what else do I have? Right. Who am I going to be with? I might as well stay. When he hit me, at least he buys me stuff after. Or, you know, he takes me out. He says, sorry, he really loves me. Oh my God. I pray that I've never been in that situation. There's a lot of people that do, you know, one of the main reasons they're not really having a relationship with their mom is because she chose men over me. I've seen her in and out of relationships. It causes conflict because you're just seeing your mom like that. And you either, like, grow to not respect her or you grow to, like, hate her or bitterness. You grow bitterness because it's like, how can you do that? And that's really crazy to me how people really be choosing their boyfriends over their kids. Like, my, this man did this to me. And you stay with him? Right. And that's not supposed to scar your children. No, this is a topic that... That we could just go on and on about. It really, really should be expressed. Should be expressed. And people are looking for a way out. You know, and I just want to say that we're not specialists in giving people advice, but there are professionals out there. And if you are in any situation, you can contact the professional. You know, we'll try to put some information up at the end of our podcast so that you can have, but there are professionals out there. Oh, and I know the best professional of them all. Jesus. He's number one. Number one. I call him. We recommend him. Well, thank you for joining our podcast. We're so excited. Can't wait for the next part, too. So don't miss it. Okay. Thank you for tuning in. And signing off. I'm not. No. I was going to sign off. It was kind of difficult. Go ahead. Oh, yeah. I'm asking. Armour and Sons plus her. Go ahead. Exit us out with our music. Exit music. Lying at your feet. She's my favorite girl. In the whole wide world. My whole wide world. My whole wide world. My whole wide world. My whole wide world. In the whole wide world. My favorite girl. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear. And clear.