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The conversation is about whether Shauna should go back to camp next year. The main points are that Shauna showed courage and strength by going to camp, and it could be a good opportunity for her to grow and gain independence. The others share their own experiences of leaving home and how it helped them mature. They suggest finding someone to go with Shauna to provide support and create a positive experience. Ultimately, the decision is up to Shauna, but her family is supportive either way. Oh my God. Yeah, extraordinarily well. So maybe this conversation belongs with you, all three of you, and Amy and Jessica, because I wouldn't want to take it too much further about what would be the safeguards going back with somebody. You know, how would they integrate that person and how do they integrate other people? It brings up a whole lot of questions. And maybe in this call, we could only go around and say why we think it's worth giving it another chance. If this is a space of growing up and breathing out without all your other your peeps being with you at all times. If the person that you hired to go had a focus on growing up and stretching, certainly we heard that you tried different foods. That's a big one. That's a change in your life. And there's other things that were changes. And that's from you just looking out into how other people were doing things. But now that you've applied or, you know, registered in advance, maybe you could get more conversation. And that to me sounds like brokering. Brokering what the right relationship would be between her and her support person in the camp. And for that, we would need an idea of what really went down or what happened. I mean, truly, I don't quite get what happened. I know that some of the experiences that I was talking to you about, Shana, you might not really have gotten to take them in as much as I hoped you would. But, you know, it doesn't mean you stop trying. I think that's the conversation. If we could each say an argument for going back this year so that you could hear it, Shana, what you would hope, what we would hope for you if you do go back or when you go back. And then I would say the conversation has to be had about the deal breakers. But at what point would you know that it isn't serving her to go back? She went to bed and covered herself with a blanket. Sorry, I didn't get that. She went to the room, Judy, and covered herself with a blanket. Well, this is the danger of this conversation being shame-based, right? Feeling like I wanted to, I tried my darndest, I was there on my own trying to problem-solve it, and look what happened. So, if it was damaging for you, Shana, then that's what we've got to try to either change or find other maturing experiences. Clearly, being apart from your family is how we all end up, you know, maturing, growing up as a young adult. That's how I did it. That's how Jessica, Amy, certainly how your sister, Kyla, did it. Leaving home for school. So, what about the proposal of us, I guess in a loud voice, speaking to the why you would go with the proper supports, and having a sidebar conversation about how you might broker and negotiate. I know you've been trying to do it, but at some point you'd want some assurances. And so, the no, no, no, Shana, could be, hey, I don't think you guys get what it was like for me. I loved it, and I hated it. I loved it, I took risks, but not many. I don't know, I'm trying to guess. So, Jess, maybe you can begin with the idea of what might Shana want to hear around the reasons to give it another go. Yeah. I can't speak too loud or else I'll start to cough. I think, I mean, the whole thing that set out for me, Shana, was that you went. You were hours away from your comfort zone, and the amount of courage and strength that takes, because it wasn't just for a day, you went and you rode out the majority of two weeks. And I think that without knowing the ins and outs of really what happened at camp, I think the strength and courage it took for you to simply be there is reason enough for you to go back and feel, it must have felt empowering to be your own woman in your own space. Whether or not you were out and about or not, you were in charge of yourself and your autonomy of your space, and that needed to feel pretty good. And I think that would be my, not argument, but my thing about maybe we should explore going back. I hear her giggling. Even though she's in her room, I can hear her pausing, and then also giggling. Well, you know, Jessica, Jessica is not my age. I beat her, double her in age, probably. But she gets what you must, I mean, how you can hear the pride, she's very proud of you, about how much you did stretch. And I'm in full agreement with what she said, you know, got in the car, drove for hours and miles, and then got there, and then saw people of your own age and went and started talking, your parents are going, Oh, but show us this, show us that. She's like, No, you can beat it home now, mom and dad, you know. So all of that is what young women do when they want to take a shot at growing up. And so there's lots, lots of courage, you showed for sure. And we don't even know, because you're not using words as much what happened. And that would be a great conversation to have, so that we know what would be good support next time, so that you can be more involved. I know that you went to the dance, because I could see it all over your body. That dance was important to you. And I don't, I don't blame you. It's hard. It's hard to get to go to a dance when you're your age. So, Amy. Well, I definitely, Shauna, agree with Jessica a little bit about being a woman and how much courage it takes to take those first steps towards being away from your family. And that courage it takes gets a little bit easier in my personal experience, every time you try it. So even if something might be scary a little bit, or uncomfortable, in my personal experience as a young woman that moved really far away from home, every time I went somewhere, it got a little bit easier. And every time I tried something a little bit different on my own, I learned something new about myself that gave me even more confidence and courage to want to try new things. And so for me, I would love to explore a little bit more about what went well with you, Shauna, and what was hard for you while you were there. So we can really talk with the people who want to support you to have a really good new experience next time. So that would just be my advice. You know, I know that I'm double your age in a little bit. But I do remember those first few times that I went away and had a serious life on my own. And it was hard. But those are the memories that stay with me the most now as a growing woman that I fall back on. Every time I have to do something new, I just think to myself, Oh, my gosh, Shauna takes me back. So it gives you strength, right? Those experiences give you strength. And they get better and better. As people are saying, the hard things we do, get easier and easier, especially when we know how much language you have and can share with people. It could be that we find somebody to go with you and you build a whole lot of trust and excitement together about how you'll approach the camp next year. Kyla, you definitely had an experience most recently about taking the leap and leaving your family and growing up. Yeah, I mean, even, Shauna, for me, I think back to when I went to camp for my first time, and how, honestly, man, that was just a whole week of just, like, first of all, going from obviously mom and dad never letting me have sleepovers to then jumping off the dock feet first into a full week of overnight camp. As much as I kind of like what Amy shared, as much as I, you know, struggled and was learning how to grow up living on my own these past few years, I did fall back on my first memories of just leaving home at camp for the first time. And for me, Shauna, I think I'm just trying to be the big sister, and I'm rallying for you to go back, even if, you know, you might have felt like, eh, this is a little, this is a little, you know, this is a little intense. Like Amy and Jessica said, it only gets better when you keep doing it. And since you did basically two weeks, one week is just going to be a brief. And then from there, you know what it looks like. You know what to expect from camp. For me, I really feel like you'll, you'll enjoy it more. And the staff also know you will more too, since they had to get to know you this past year. So, but, but, Shauna, whatever you decide, you know, we're, we're here for it. And, you know, we're here to also brainstorm and help things go as smoothly as possible. But I'm really rooting for you to have a camp experience that I've had. I've been lucky to have too. Well, I told you, Shauna, about Eric. And I'm sure he's been going for maybe 24 years now. And I'm sure his first year wasn't perfect, for sure, because he was like this close to his mom. And he hadn't been away from his mom. He was very close. And, but now he goes eight weeks a summer. And so he's there the entire time. And it's the best part of his year, because he learns about himself. And he makes friends of men and women and does everything he can get his hands on trying, singing, doing all this stuff. So just because the first time, as you said, was intense. You've had a practice run, and now you can go back and keep practicing. What about you, Zen? Honesty. Say honesty. Say it from the heart. Come on. To Shauna. You don't know what you're gonna be doing. What do you expect from being away from home? And most of the time, you're like, hey, it's gonna be fun. And I have to do what I want to do. And, you know, and the other side of it is, I'm gonna be, you know, I'm gonna miss home. I'm gonna miss my dad. But that's part of it, of being, growing up and, you know, going away on your own, or start to be on your own. And it's a big decision on yourself to be like, because you have to watch what you're gonna do. Basically, your body will be in control, I would say. You're on your own. It's gonna be fun. If you think of the fun stuff, but if you go on the other side, it won't be as nice. Right, Shauna? Yeah, okay. Especially if you've got the right person with you. It's kind of Donna to say, look, why doesn't she come back next year with someone she knows, can speak to, can communicate well with, and then she'll be more willing to do things out and about. And I believe that. And Mama Bear? Well, you know what? I think with Donna saying that we can bring... Well, not to us, to your daughter. Hey, Shauna, I talked to Donna today, and she said, if you bring a friend that you really trust, and be with you, she said you can go and stay for another week to come to Canada. Would you like to go back? She said, yeah. I think so. With that invitation, Rose, that invitation, Shauna, the reason you said yes last week, and the reason you're saying yes now, is that you know it will be good for you. Right? To grow up. It's the place that you, you know, it's a nice place to learn to grow up. And you might go to college someday, like your sister did. But this is the place for you to learn who you are and what you want in life. And it's going to help you in terms of building your circle as well. Because you'll have experience making friends. Because you're now 21, and it's the big year of leaving high school. It's a big year. All right. Well, I can't see your face, but your mom and dad are saying you're saying yes. You would like to not be so frightened that you wouldn't go back. You'd like to give it a go and take a chance and learn how to grow up at a place that has lots of people that you can meet. Maybe we can leave it at that. Unless you want to say some words, so that we can all hear you. What words would you want to say? Can you come here? What words would you want to say? They're all here. She said, thank you. That's that's that's you're welcome. You're welcome. Instead of goodbye. Thank you. You're welcome. Come and say it's here. She won't move. She won't move. Pose. Pose. Pose what you're doing. Okay. And you don't say a goodbye then? I thought you were going to be here. The computer. The laptop. Come on. Come on. Come to the stage. Show your face. Come on. Come on. We're just we're just exploring if you can be on on Zoom meetings. That's all, Shawna, where you're where we can see your face and we can hear you more directly. But you said thank you. And I think that's good for both Amy, Jessica and I to know that we we have your back. We want to make sure to advocate with you about what you need and what you want. And your parents are the same way. Kyle is the same way. They want to make sure you have every opportunity to learn about yourself. So that's a good deal. And you'll have to start getting used to using the word Kennebec. So that the next time when Jessica comes over and Amy starts helping you tell your story, it'd be nice if we could hear from you going back to Kennebec. Going back to camp. Maybe you can work on that those words, because that really is clear as crystal clear. If that's really what you want to do, your parents are willing to give you the money to do it, which is pretty darn special. That's pretty special. It really is. Kylie, close your ears about how much it costs. I know. Oh, my goodness. Even with tuition and all your firsts. That's great. Well, thanks for talking. And I did want to say I've been telling everyone in the review things that I looked in the project, and I don't think we've had a mentoring conversation. Remember that mentoring group? And we used to get together and have a dedicated mentoring conversation. So I've asked if we could do a mentoring conversation with families. So that would be whoever would want to have a dedicated mentoring conversation. Kylie, you've done it before. Rose, you've done it. Zen, I don't think you've ever done it. And I don't know if Donna and Heather are going to do it. I just need to know how many people, and we'll do it in groups of three like we always do. And then all the other families are really excited about doing that because you guys haven't heard each other and known where everyone's at. So it will give you a nice check-in and a nice learning as we grow. So if that's okay, could you get back to Jessica about who would want to be part of that? And then I'll do a doodle and try to find times once I know how many people would be part of that. If you're interested, come in. What dates are you thinking about? First, I want to know who's in so I know what number. Because if it's more than four, I'll split into two groups. And if it's only four, then I'll keep it in one group. Would you like to try that? Would you like or you want to think about it? Yes. I would be in. I would be in. Jenna says she's going to think about it. Okay. Kylie? She's in. Oh, you're in. I'm in. Okay. All right. So I'll write up something probably on Sunday or Monday to remind people that that's part of the plan. And then the three facilitators will have their own mentoring conversation. Because we've had these kinds of meetings, but we haven't had a let's give people time to make sense of it all. And next time you guys get together working on the story, we'll talk more about how important the story is to even complete the first part of getting ready for the planning celebration day. And I'll be coming back and talking about the rhythm. I know I keep mentioning it, but we're talking about life until now, what's life like now, and what's the future look like. So that's how the day goes. And at some point after the story's done and that's off your plate, then we'll start thinking about, well, who would come to the planning celebration day? How do we invite them? How do we let them know what it means and what it is? And Shana, you would be inviting people to come for that special day. And then how do we want to make it into a celebration? And it is the foundation, the solid foundation, for then having people come back after they get the story of your life. Because we write the planning day up, and then everyone that was there, and even those that were invited but couldn't make it, get it. And they add stories and add perceptions and edit it with us, for us. We do all weekend. We push it back to everyone that was there. And then we take all the edits and they get it. And people are pretty excited to make it move forward. And so we bring them together on Zoom or together in person. This is what a circle is. This is how it would make this plan, you know, that helped the person take up more adulthood. And we start the circle process. So the big, big list is made with the aim of having people say yes to coming to the one day. And not, yes, I'm coming to the circle. Because the one day practices and models a circle. It's very similar to a circle in the safety of it and in the processes that I introduce. And so it's not too far a leap to actually think about, yeah, I mean, people are like eager, eager to now get going and help you, Shawna, after doing that day. And the answer, the solution is the circle. Or your imagination as a family is to keep people together over time to the extent they can contribute. So if you can see them as two separate and distinct things, the invitation to the day of planning and celebrating your life. And then coming to hear more about a circle without having to have any pressure on them to agree. And then we start the circle up. We start meeting, Shawna. We actually start people coming regularly together to think about how they can be in your life and to learn how it is to listen to you and take direction from you. And Jessica, you would bring up when Judith is coming back, right, too, as well? January 22, 26. Yeah. I wasn't. The consulate is no longer, right? Yeah. But they, we are sent in. Are you going to, yeah, you'll book that, Jessica. Yeah. We were, and I thought I was just bringing it up here for the consulate, but there's no consulate any longer, right? Because they said they were good that week. Yeah. On to the Philippines, right? Yeah. Kyla and Jen are leaving for the Philippines the 28th, so we prefer if you want that to be ahead. But I don't know your shift on the day, 22, January 22. Do you know your shift already? Okay. We can go, yeah, we can go back. Just send you a text. That's fine. Just send you a text. Okay. That will text Jessica. Yeah. Thank you. All righty. Yeah, the other thing I just want to mention before we go is Jess and I are going to reach out and organize some time to get together, Shawna, so we can start looking at pictures. Mm-hmm. How many pictures are you thinking that we could print? As many as? All of them. A lot? A lot. All of them. And then we nominate. We got thousands. And then we get thousands. Yeah, we got thousands. Did you hear the photographer said? We got thousands. So a good handful, like, you know, some good pictures from all those different kind of eras, like really small, a little bit bigger, you know. But like a good assortment of pictures from all of those eras, like a good, like we can spread it out and feel them numbers, you know. I'm making notes. That's why I have the questions in here, Jessica. That's why I'm asking, how many pictures do you need? Assort it. As many as humanly possible. Like 4,000, because that might take a while. All righty. She'll be, you'll be having a bowl this big and you'll be tossing them. Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope. Ah! Well, you know her, right? When she's overwhelmed, she might not be able to focus. So we're going to go. Little chunks. You can do that. Don't have to do them all in one day, Shawna. I don't want to, you know. You're going to have to do that for hours. Yep. You'll get sick of us. We'll be there for a little bit of time, as frequently as we need to be. All righty. That's good. Yeah. Sounds good. I'll be thrilled when I come back June, January, whatever, whatever, 21 or 22 or whatever, and hear that you have figured out what you want to say about your life. That would be great. Okay. Show pictures and then push the button and it will speak, or you speak first about the one word you want to say, the two words you want to say. This is a real chance for everyone to know that you've got a voice. Mm-hmm. Yep. All righty. It's Friday night. Enjoy, everyone. Thank you so much. Get better, Kyla. Get better, Kyla. Get better. Say bye now. Say bye. Keep saving. Come on. Bye, Shawna. Come on. Come on. Bye, Shawna. Get better soon. Get better soon. Bye, Shawna. Bye. Bye. You don't get used to Zoom, Shawna. You don't get used to it. Take a second.