Unshakeable Client Dissatisfaction...is the client ALWAYS right?!

The host of the Unshakeable Podcast, Courtney Allison, shares her thoughts and experiences with her listeners. She emphasizes the importance of doing inner expansion work to scale and grow a business. Courtney records her podcast episodes in various locations, even when the sound quality is not perfect, to show her audience that imperfection is okay. She expresses gratitude for the positive feedback she has received and the impact her podcast has had on listeners. Courtney then discusses a conversation she had with a client who had to let go of a client due to boundary-crossing behavior. She challenges the idea that the client is always right and emphasizes the need for personal power and maintaining standards in business. Courtney encourages listeners to not let criticism or questioning from clients undermine their self-worth. She offers advice on attuning the nervous system to focus on moments that demonstrate care and staying in personal power. Hello, everyone, and welcome back to the Unshakeable Podcast. I'm your host, Courtney Allison. I'm a Nervous System Expansion Coach and Business Mentor for entrepreneurs, women in business, who are really ready to do the inner expansion work so that they can scale, they can grow their business to the next level, where they have the confidence and courage to really play full out and play big, and it all starts with what's going on inside of you. Welcome back. I am just ... Oh, I'm over here. I'm driving, actually, to go get dinner, ordering Chipotle, because I just spent all afternoon at the pool with my kiddos, and my husband and I were like, we're not cooking tonight. I'm actually driving to go get that, and I'm like, oh, this is the perfect time to record a nice little podcast episode. I've just been getting such incredible feedback from quite a few of you who have been tuning in and coming to me and saying, Courtney, thank you for the way that you are showing up in your podcast. Thank you for just hitting record, no matter where you're at, whether you're on a walk, whether you're in the yard with your kids, you're in the car. The last episode, the sound recording was terrible, because I forgot to turn off the Bluetooth on my phone, so it was my car speakers that picked up the sound. I was like, screw it. I'm posting it. I'm uploading that episode anyway, and here we are. So many of you have been sending me the most amazing messages saying, this is really helping me feel like I can then show up in the imperfect, messy, real way. That is truly us, right? I don't have to sit at my computer and put the microphone on and make sure that the room is perfectly quiet, or all of that, because honestly, that rarely happens, and if that was the way, if I was like, I've got to have the perfect setting, environment, got to make sure kids are quiet and dogs are quiet, or make sure that no one's home, it would probably never get done, which is probably why I never went past four episodes when I launched my podcast a couple of years ago. It's just, I can tell, helping so many of you feel like you have permission to be imperfect and messy, and I even had someone reach out and say, I have been wanting to do a podcast for so long, and I kept stopping myself because of that perfectionism piece, and she said I actually sat down, she's a mom as well, she's like, I actually sat down and recorded my first episode. The other day I was outside, and I just let it go, I just let the stories go, the perfectionism go, and I just hit record, and that was like, ah, the best, and so that is really a huge reason why I am doing it this way, for me, because I know that that is the only way that it'll get done, but also for you, for me to show you, to model to you, to lead this way of like, it gets to be this way, and it's perfect, and it's beautiful, and it's messy, and it's real. So, just wanted to share, you know, just the love and the gratitude that I have for all of you tuning in, and thank you for sending me those messages, and letting me know that it's impacting you. Alright, let's get into today's little message, and it's something that I recently had a conversation with a client of mine, she is an incredible wellness practitioner, and she's someone that I have worked with for quite a few years, and she's become a dear friend, and we were just having a little conversation the other day, and she said, Courtney, it's been a day, and you'd actually be proud of me, but I had to release a client from my care, and someone that she had been working with for a couple months, and this client just continuously was crossing boundaries, was not living into the standards that my friend has set for her business, and was just really playing into, you know, a lot of victim stories, and just truly wasn't doing the work, and so it was, you know, a lot of things piled upon each other, and my friend's client decided that this wasn't a good fit for them anymore, and had to basically fire this client, and just say, you know, I wish you all the best, and you know, she did it in such a beautiful, beautiful, like embodied, connective, like heart-led way, but she said, this is just no longer a fit, and unfortunately, this woman did not have, you know, a good response. It definitely triggered her, and you know, she said some pretty harsh, nasty things to my friend and client, and it was, you know, just kind of a huge, like, aha moment for my friend and client of, the client is not always right, and this is the conversation for the day, because there's, like, the woman in us, right, the conditions, like, be a nice girl, be good, you know, this social nervous system of ours that tells us to make everyone happy, to please everyone, right, that people-pleaser that so many people have active in their nervous system wiring, this people-pleaser part was in full effect, and also then, we're also told kind of in the business space, it's like, the client, you know, the customer is always right, especially when you're in, like, a service-based industry, right, the customer is always right. We've got to make sure everybody is happy, no one leaves dissatisfied, et cetera, right, and so we kind of have been conditioned to go, let's say, the extra mile to make sure that our clients, that our customers are completely satisfied, and if they aren't, then we have to jump over all the, you know, the heaps and leaps and all of that to make sure that they are okay, and that they are never at fault, and I completely disagree, and I fully believe that the client is not always right, the customer is not always right, and in our profession, right, in, let's say, the service-based, like, coaching or wellness practitioner space, the mentorship space, it can be really tricky to stay in your personal power, and to stay in a place of your standards that you've set for yourself and for your business, and to stay in your, you know, not letting your boundaries be crossed, because so much of our heart and soul is in our business, right? It's like, we're leading this business from our heart, we're leading it from our story, from our experience, from our embodiment, and so when a customer or client comes in, and they start to question us, because we have our heart so wrapped up in our business, it starts to feel really blurry and really sticky that they are now questioning us as a person. And oftentimes, if we have not built a strong sense of personal power, a strong sense of purpose in what we're doing, and truly, to me, it's like an upgraded nervous system of really this social piece, like the social nervous system of us that is in relationship to other people. Right? If we are in a dysregulated place where the minute anyone questions something about us, they question our business, right? So just going with the theme of like a client, not being happy, a client saying these things about us that truly are not true. If we are not in this like upgraded, developed, you know, like strong, resilient space within us, it can totally destroy us. It can totally like make us question everything that we're doing in our business. And it can make us question like, Oh, gosh, am I a bad practitioner? Am I a bad coach? Am I a bad, you know, whatever your service, you know, is, or whatever your business is. Because now, someone is questioning our heart. Someone is questioning that we don't care about them. Right? Like, how dare you do this to me? Right? And I fully believe that this is one of the biggest pieces of a business that takes people out of the running to be really highly successful, because we haven't always learned how to navigate these really hard, sticky situations with other people. And so we just try to maybe like sweep it under the rug or just say, Okay, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I'm sorry. You're right. You know, I apologize. Like, just don't be mad at me. Right? Like how many times have you let go of what you know to be true about you, just to like, keep the peace? Right? It's like, just keep the peace. Just let it go. Just, you know, whatever. Just be kind. Just be, you know, like, just let them, let them think that. Right? Let them just give in to them. Right? All these different like stories that I could just I'm even like hearing from my adolescence, right? But we've been conditioned to like, keep the peace, to make sure that other people are happy with us to make sure that we don't rock the boat to make sure that we don't trigger anyone. But in your business, if you deeply want to be successful, and be a leader, these are the moments that it's going to take for you to really step into a different level of leadership, a different level of embodied purpose and power in what you are bringing to the world, right. And so my client was sharing with me of like, this woman was telling me now that I don't care. And she's like, I, you know, Courtney, like, I care, like, I care extremely, extremely deeply. But the minute this person brought it in, it triggered this, like, what if she's right? What if I don't care? What if other people are thinking this about me? Right? It was just like now this spiral, this overthinking. And so I had to help her through, like, hey, let's attune our nervous system back to all of the spaces, the places, the ways that you do care. Right? To again, like, not like prove it to ourselves, but it's like, no, I do care. And here's, and here's how and here's where, right. And so I was like, write out a list of all the little tiny things that maybe don't seem like a big deal, but are instances that show to yourself that you do care. It's not that you have to go and like, tell this woman, oh, I do care because blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, right? It's like, no, this is simply for you to stay in your personal power. And so, you know, she, I had her write out this list. And it wasn't just write out the list. But now it's like, okay, and now let's bring that back into our body. Let's actually feel the care in our system. Let's realign ourself back to this woman, this client, this, you know, unhappy person can say this about me. And yet, I have other evidence, both in my head, right, and all these experiences. But also I have the evidence in my body, I can feel the care that I have. Right? I can feel the purpose that I have. And this is the importance of like the nervous system work and the somatic work and bringing things into our body is because we're, we're, we're reacting to the feeling of someone saying we don't care, right, or someone being unhappy. And we have to learn though, how to balance how to hold them, right, hold the feeling of them not being happy with us. And also hold the feeling of, well, I do care. And this, I can feel it, I can access it in my system. And I have other evidence that tells me otherwise. Right. And so when we did this, there was like, like a sinking into her knowing, like, I do care. And this is okay. And what happens when you do that is it opens up to a new level of confidence, a new level of just this personal power, right, this new level of strength and, and resiliency to continue forward. Because as women in business, especially heart led women, right, we're doing a business that feels like something that is like a calling. When we are questioned by a client, which is going to happen, like there is no way around that, it is going to happen. But what do you do? How do you respond? How do you hold that? That's your nervous system. And that's, and it's not just like, oh, this is just, I always freak out, like, no, you can build this, you can, you can shift this. And it's really important to you, because there's going to be these moments that you have to hold that you have to navigate, that you have to step into a bigger sense of leadership. But it has to come from within, you can't then rely on only if everybody is happy with me, then I'm okay, then I'm a good business owner, then I'm a good coach, then I'm a this, right? It has to be this embodied sense that you have within you, no matter what. So the client is not always right. They're going to question you. They're going to maybe not be happy with you. But it doesn't mean that then you have to jump through the hoops to make sure that they are satisfied if boundaries are being crossed on your end, okay? Beginning to then shift the story of, I can have someone unhappy with me. And, you know, it obviously goes without saying that, like, you have to know in your heart, too, that, like, you did everything that you promised, right? Like, you held your end of the bargain, right? You held yourself to the higher standard, right? But if that's the case, then you're going to have to hold maybe the dissatisfaction, someone misunderstanding you, someone not being happy with you, and hold that in your body while still also feeling the sense of I do care. I am really good at this, right? I do have a big purpose here. This is personal power, the ability to hold both of those. Okay, so if you're experiencing a moment like this, it's okay. It's part of, you know, the growing pains of growing a business and being a business owner. But it's, you know, your responsibility to really do the deeper inner work surrounding how you show up in your business. And so really just maybe taking stock of when a client maybe shows, you know, any sort of dissatisfaction with me or, you know, says something, or maybe they're not even saying anything. Maybe it's just like my own, my own stories of like, Oh, my gosh, are they mad at me? Do they not think I'm good enough? You know, are they not getting, you know, the value or the results? And so now what does that mean? Like, really take stock at like, when something like that happens, whether someone says something to you, or you're kind of bringing up the stories yourself, what really happens? Right? Like, how then do you respond to that? And start seeing where am I dropping my power? Am I dropping my power? When something like this happens? Am I starting to have these stories around not being good at this or not being a good business owner or not caring enough or not doing a good enough job? Right? Are you dropping that power? Or are you staying? You know, are you really staying and holding your power in the midst of that? And that's the true, the true goal. Because without that power, I'm really holding that personal power and holding that belief and holding the like, I am really good at this. I'm doing a great job at this. You'll either want to give up your business. Or, you know, it won't ever really grow to the scale that you have the potential to take it. But it's all these little inner workings that play a part in it. It's all these little moments, how you interact with them, how you navigate them, how you lead yourself through them, that shapes your nervous system around being a highly successful woman in business or the woman that couldn't, couldn't hold it, couldn't hack it. Right? So that's the message for today. Your client is not always right. And you have to stay true to what you know, is true about you, right? That personal power, this must be developed on your journey. So thank you, as always, for tuning in. If this really landed for you, please share this podcast with a friend. And I'd also love it if you would go and leave me a rating and review just letting me know how this is resonating for you. Send me a message. And if you are realizing, wow, there's a lot of a lot of inner work that goes alongside being a woman in business, and I want to be that successful woman in business, but like, man, I need to strengthen my inner world, man, I need to strengthen my personal power, I need to really step it up on that internal space, that nervous system space, alongside building an empowered business. This is the most epic work that we get to do together inside of expand my six month group program and mastermind space. And so if that is something you know, that you are desiring, just that mentorship, that community, just really learning how to step it up within, then please reach out, let me know that you are interested in joining and I will take it from there. All right, take care and I'll, I'll catch you on the next episode.