Kinda All Over the Place #2

Hi, this is Tracy with Connecting with Friends, and we are on number three. We've got Trish still here with us, and she is going to bring a topic today, or have you thought of that? I told you last week, bring a topic. You did. I asked for some input from friends on what you would listen to in a podcast. Okay. They're not topics I'm real comfortable talking about. Oh, that makes it more fun. This will be fun. We got you. Okay. Tell everyone out there you'd like to know. What I now know that I wish I knew then about sex, misconceptions about sex, married sex versus single sex, sex then versus sex now. Is there anything not sexual? Let's see. Not that I have a problem talking about sex. I'm beginning to question your friends. This is the one with six kids. Oh. Oh, that's funny. Okay. And how sex is scary now in your 40s, which we talked about a little bit on. Oh, yeah. You were in that conversation, I think, on Friday night. Do you remember the conversation? Do you remember us talking about how sex can be scary nowadays? Yes, because we were talking about the phrases and ... Oh, Nicole. Well, that wasn't necessarily what I was scared about. Hey, we should quiz Nikki about our new phrases that we discussed. I can't even really. Well, let's face it. Can I say this as a tutor? No, it's fine. We are perfectly fine. What does it mean if I say I'm going to raw dog in pound town? Or did I use that right? That sounds like doggie style. I'm going to raw dog you? I'm going to raw dog? I'm going to go home and raw dog, I don't know what. No, I don't think girls are going to raw dog. Or is it boys that raw dog? Why wouldn't they? It just means ... Well, just tell us what raw dog means. Well, Carrie just told me. Yeah, no safety net. Okay. And that's also the same as? Not a condom. No, Carrie had another phrase. Oh, now I even forget what it was. Wasn't that barebacking? Barebacking. Oh, I knew that. I knew that. Okay. And we had another phrase, but I don't remember what it is. We were trying to ... Urban dictionary? That's what she did. That's where we learned. Oh, yeah. That's where we learned all that stuff last time. No, it's usually where I look up phrases I'm unfamiliar with. That is where ... But if you like ... I don't just randomly read it. You did. Don't randomly read it. Really? The phrase of the day is ... Yeah. I'm going to start randomly reading it. Don't go to urban dictionary and just randomly read it. I am going to. And now I'm going to have a word of the day. You can't tell Carrie no and think she's not going to do it anyway. See what you want to do, but ... Let's have word of the day. Sometimes you learn things you didn't want to know. Oh, there you go. I do every day. Okay, so what was the other thing? Well, the scary sex, why sex is scary now. Also, does everybody have ADHD? Is it really ADHD? Is it just the result of technology and natural reaction to our attention being pulled in so many different directions? Okay, we're going to pass on that one. We're going to pass on that one. Well, she can't focus on that. Seriously, I forgot to warn you guys. I am out of my ADHD medicine until tomorrow. Oh, because there's a shortage. There's a national shortage. Yes, there is. I do know that. And I'm telling you. And then I've been meaning to go pick it up because I've been out, but I keep forgetting to go pick it up. Oh, no. It's a typical problem. Why didn't you tell us? We would remind you. I feel like it's, you know, granted. That's what friends are for. I just kept forgetting. I'd be like, oh, I need to go pick that up. You know, typical ADHD, you know. I will do a post-it note on the front door, on the inside of the front door. Yeah. We don't need the neighbors. I drive somewhere, and I'm like, oh, crap, I need to be going here. What am I doing? I am a list person. I know. I know. Plus my dad. I get my emails from him. Okay, let me see. I had a list, and I can't find it now. This was just what she said. Okay, let me read it. So, where is she at? Isn't that a joke? That's what she said. There, all that. We could talk about your purse friends, because we started to talk about it earlier, and we got shushed. Oh, I don't think anyone wants to hear about Kate Spade. I do. Talk to me slowly. Okay, let's talk about this. Married sex versus single sex, then and now. This is going to be hard for me to talk about, because if my parents ever hear this podcast, I want them to. They know you're having sex. No, they think I'm a virgin. I want them to think I'm a virgin. Good luck. You have a couple kids. That's right. I've been married for 20 years. Doesn't it make you a virgin again? Maybe. Maybe. I realize I've had two kids, but I've had sex twice, as have my parents, who have two children. Yes. That's how I think of it. Only had sex twice. Not mine. I've never given birth. Well, that is true. That is true. You have four children and never have given birth. So, there you go. Maybe you are a virgin. I know, firsthand, you're not. Not firsthand. Really? I was like, really? Hang on, we're not that close. I was like, wait a minute. None of my friends have gone that far yet. I so want to share your nickname. I want to share your middle school and high school nickname. Absolutely not. Okay, that's an absolute not. That means I want to hear it. I've heard Nick's voice get deep on that one. I won't, because it would give away her virginity. I won't. But I wasn't really there. But I was close. Why? Was he yelling, ow, ow, ow, or what? No, I've never been with... I've never been with Nick. I've never been with Nick. I've never been with Nick. I've never been with Nick. I've never been with Nick. I've never been with Nick. I've never been with Nick. I've never been with Nick. I've never been with Nick. I've never been with Nick. 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I should have brought a chaperone with me. It was stupid. See, and I, if I don't connect with somebody, I will not have sex with them. We connected. No, yeah, we connected. Oh, I'm the same way. Yeah, you connected. No, it's got to be like, it's different. I feel a bond. It's a different kind of connection. I felt like we were connected. We laughed. It was just, the way it was set up though, it was so romantic. I don't know who could have said no because I told you about this on Friday. It was, there were meteor showers. Oh, yeah, it was all that time. Meteor shower night. There were meteor showers and so we had decided we're going to watch the showers. But she didn't go into this with the intention of having sex. Not at all. No, she brought blankets and pillows. I did bring blankets and pillows. To watch the meteor showers. Yes, but you're not going to have sex. You should have brought another couple. It was going to be like a, what kind of couple are you bringing? It was going to be like a sort of a picnic. And so that's why the blankets and pillows were brought. And it was going to be in the back of a truck. Again, now that I'm saying this out loud. In the back of a van. It feels like it was going to be leaving somewhere regardless. But the idea was we wanted to watch the showers. So we went to a lake and parked by the lake. Are you sure you're not an 18-year-old boy planning this date? This was the farmer's only time. This was the guy from the farmer's only time frame. Well, that's about right. Back of a truck, by a lake. I mean, it was probably. Or hay. No. Or either. Just blankets. There were cowboy boots and a cowboy hat. I have to say, it was the most romantic date I've ever been on. Really? I mean, you're laying there watching the stars shoot across the sky by a lake. It was very romantic. So how long did you watch the stars before it got busy? Like two to three hours. God, it took you that long? Well, we talked. There was good conversation. We talked. We connected. We did. Yes. Did he ghost you? No. We talked for a while after that. But there was some. See, I always feel like you have to have sex more than once. Because the first time, you're just getting to know each other's body a little bit. Second time, you're getting to know the body a little bit more. Third time. Yes. No. He. By that time, I'm dating him a year or two. Yes. You know. Normally for me, that is the case. This was very much not like what I typically do at all. I broke all my own rules. And I can't say I regret it. He was nice. But he had a weird relationship with his ex-wife to where he would stay at her house if she was out of town. For the kids? I mean, they wouldn't even be there. They would be gone with her. But did the house fit? It was just. Did he have animals? Was it his house? She had animals. She did have animals. Was it his house? They had lived there together. Before the divorce? They were. I don't know. It was just a little weird. tubing down the Elkhorn with her and her new. It was a little weird for me. I know that people our age probably have had other relationships and been married. I don't need to hang out as a group in the beginning of a relationship. Later on, fine, if we all get along. But it was just too much. Did you ever meet her? No. No. We should have met her because maybe you guys would have. I never saw him again after the meteor showers. We talked after that. It just didn't seem like it was a fit. Are you sure it wasn't a fit? Are you sure? I just suddenly feel like a middle school kid. I feel like I've gone back to the days of eighth grade. I mean, isn't that what happens when you talk with your girlfriends? You talk about all that stuff. Yeah. My first kiss was in the boys' bathroom at Gear Library. It was just quick. At the bathroom. How old were you? Fifth or sixth grade. Oh, is that a real kiss, though? I mean, fifth or sixth grade. My daughter says that her kiss on the playground as a kindergartner is a real kiss. Oh, I used to knock boys down. I think you used to knock boys down. My boyfriend did, like in first grade. There's one. Let's tackle him down. Gosh, I hope that never happened to my sons. We'd, like, clothesline them. Here, let me clothesline you so I can kiss you. Where was your first kiss? I think I know who, but where. I'm going to have to think about this. Hang on. I don't remember who it was. I'm going to guess a backseat or a cornfield. Small town. This is Nebraska. That's why I, but I think it was, I think it might have been a cornfield. It's a cornfield. It was in the library bathroom. I have to think who it was. Hang on. Okay, I want to tell them about mine while she's. Yeah, yeah. So, mine was, I was, like, in first grade, and my little first boyfriend, he used to walk me home from school, and then we would sit up on the propane tank. He would help me get up on the propane tank, and we would sit there. And my first hand holding was on that propane tank, and he couldn't say his R, so he'd say twicey. Oh, how cute. Yes. And so, yeah, my first kiss was sitting on a propane tank, like, first or second grade. Yeah, but I don't remember it happening. It was, like, a memory they had, but I didn't remember it. Oh, I hate when that happens. Somebody will go, oh, you remember when we did this? And I was, like, okay, what age was I, and was I, you know? Under the influence. Yeah, was I drunk? I probably wasn't under the influence. Was it my college years? I just don't remember it happening. Hmm. So, maybe it was a dream they had, or maybe I blacked it out. Or maybe it just doesn't mean anything to you. That's true. Apparently, it did. And it meant more to that person than it did. That's what I mean. Maybe it was a dream they had. And he tried to manifest it by telling you, so then you would lean over and give him a kiss. Oh, I betcha that's what happened. Oh, that's so adorable. Do you think people are that tricky? Tricky, tricky. So, you remembered who your first kiss was? I think people are hopeful. That's awesome. Yeah. All of you had your first kiss young. Yeah, I did. Well, just because my little beau, he was a year older than me. I hung out with mostly guys. Marvin was an older man. He was a year older. Marvin? What's his name? No, I think it was Sweet 16 had never been kissed for me. Unless this is true, that I actually did kiss someone when I was a lot younger than that. I don't remember. But how about a kiss that meant something? Well, that was different. Yeah. Yeah. Like not just a sweet, young, elementary romance kiss, but like an actual I'm interested in you kiss. Oh, I remember that. That was my first. I remember my first, like it actually meant something. I remember mine. I was 14 or 15. 14. This is what sucks when your friends are on the same podcast as you because they know your stuff. It was on the church lot next door to my house. Yeah. Yeah. I remember. You were very little. I heard about it. Well, of course. I probably called her right away. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. I was probably in your house waiting for you to finish. Probably. Waiting for you to finish. Oh, my gosh. This is taking too long. Why don't they just get it over with? Funny enough, he and I are from the same hometown. You might cover your microphone. I'll try and bleep it out. Oh, can you bleep it? Can you bleep it? Oh, that's right. That was my first kiss. Oh, my gosh. I was so. That's right. I didn't know that. Yeah. I didn't either until I was face to face with him and back to school. He lives in our neighborhood? Yeah. I hadn't seen him in, well, the whole time since graduation. And then to see him just. It always sucks when you. Have you guys run into, like, an ex-boyfriend or something? Yeah, I have. And you're just like. Typically, I would. But I was at that damn. You're on the PTA with me. And we had to sit at the damn welcome booth right inside the front door. And it was just me and one other person. I couldn't hide. I went out of body at that moment. Are you friends with any of your exes? Oh, I was at my husband's uncle and aunt's 50th anniversary party. And I sat at the same table as my high school sweetheart's sister. Oh, wow. Yeah. Yeah. I know all of my ex-boyfriends. I mean, I'm friends with them or I'm friends with their wives. I mean. No, I'm not. I mean, there's no. And that's okay. Yeah. And there's no ill feelings. They're, you know, they're just married with children and separate. We just have separate lives. Like, I don't. Yeah. I still talk to quite a few of mine. Even on the phone sometimes. Just one in particular. Yeah. We text and we'll talk on the phone. In a very platonic way. He's married. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's the same with mine. I'm pretty good at cutting people out of my life. All right, ladies. This ends number three. I don't know what we're going to name this one because we were kind of all over. All right. Thank you. Name it kind of all over. Kind of all over. Exactly. I should just name it that. All right. Love you guys. Thank you.