Self Talk

The podcast episode discusses the importance of self-talk and how it can impact our lives. The speaker shares her personal experiences and emphasizes the need to be kind and positive towards oneself. She talks about the challenges she faced and how changing her self-talk helped her overcome them. The speaker also discusses the importance of setting goals, prioritizing oneself, and having a strong support system. She concludes by mentioning her belief in God and how faith has played a significant role in her journey. What's going on beautiful people? Danielle Knight with another episode of things that are going to make your life better. So I hope. You know guys, I really don't know exactly what I'm doing here. I'm just kind of hanging out and giving you some life wisdom that I've learned. So I understand that this may not be the best podcast you've ever heard in your entire life, but I just feel like it's important and it's on my heart to share that, you know, you can't do this like alone. So you've got to learn from mistakes. You've got to be able to grow from inhibitions. You've got to be able to, you know, double down when it gets hard. But we are going to talk about self-talk today. How do you talk to yourself? What is your inner dialogue? Do you put on the happiest face ever and then turn around and rip yourself to shreds? I can say that for myself, I am guilty. 100% guilty. And what I mean by that is, you know, I'm committed to helping people. I'm committed to growing and being better. But sometimes the mental game gets in my way. And I talked about in the last episode, maybe you missed it, no big deal, but baby gate, right? Like, I thought, you know, once my husband and I started to try to get pregnant, we would just get pregnant with each other. We would just get pregnant right away. Well, I can assure you that God's timing is not your timing. So learning those lessons of being patient, waiting and understanding timing is something that is extremely difficult. Excuse me. Excuse me. We are live and raw. And I just sneezed into the mic, so you're welcome. I apologize about that. But back on track. What are your moments of decision when you realize that your self-talk is detrimental to you? Do you stop and go, you know, maybe I shouldn't talk to myself this way. Maybe I should behave and be kind to myself. I do now. I didn't before, but I do now because my self-talk is so important to myself. And what I mean by that is what I tell myself is what I believe. So if I'm constantly telling myself, you're a loser, you can't do this, this is too hard, just give up. Well, your body, your mind and your soul all hear you. And everything around you is going to fall into place because that's what you're telling it to do. Now, if you flip that script and when you are feeling beat up, disturbed, upset and not getting your way, then you have to flip the script and say, OK, you can do this. Everything is in God's timing. There's nothing that I can't handle. And just push through. I know it sucks when you don't feel like getting up to work out. I know it sucks when you feel like you want that piece of cheesecake and you can't eat it because your blood sugar is too high. Whatever the factor may be, I know it sucks. But when you sacrifice, you are able to gain everything and anything that you're supposed to have. But you have to sacrifice a little. And, you know, I love this world that we live in, you know, full of technology and full of things that people think life shouldn't be hard. And that's not reality. Life is hard. And the sooner you understand that and the sooner you say, OK, you know, I can do hard things, the sooner you grow and the sooner good things come to you. But if you're always in a self-deprivation mode where I can't do this, nothing good happens to me, nothing happens, you know, around me for my sake, then guess what? Nothing's going to happen to you. But what happens if you were to flip that script? What happens if you were to say, you know what? Everything is in perfect order. My body is amazing. And just start really loving yourself and giving yourself credit for the little things you're doing today. What if you were to do that? I can tell you for myself that little things start to stack up. And what I relate this to is drinking. I had no idea how to stop drinking. I didn't want to stop drinking. And God had a different decision for me. And thank goodness he did. But I do it one day at a time. Now, I don't think about drinking when things get tough anymore at all. I don't think about, you know, smoking a joint. I don't think about any of that stuff anymore. That's not a solution. But I think about it like, hmm, maybe I should go for a walk. Maybe I should give myself some positive affirmations. Maybe I should listen to some motivational speeches. Because everybody's had it rough. What do we do with what's been rough? You know, the fact is that the only person you can count on is yourself. And you've got to be committed to you. Because if you're not committed to you, what else is there? You know, you're going to let this world tell you what to do. It's going to be able to suck you in and say, you know what? You shouldn't do this. You should really do this. And you'll get to that point where you're just kind of falling in line. Have you ever thought about when you go to sleep and you wake up and you don't want to get out of bed? I mean, we've all been there. But when you have a goal and a purpose and you have good self-talk, you say, you know what? Five, four, three, two, one, I'm getting out of bed. And put on those running shoes and go for a run. Or you say, you know what, Danielle? I know you don't feel like doing this, but get up and take a shower anyway. You know? And that makes you feel so much better. Get up and go to the gym. There are many days that I do not feel like going to the gym. There are many days when I don't want to go into my own gym. There are many days when I don't want to do anything but sleep. Because that's what I want to do. But guess what? When I don't follow my first instinct, it's always the best for me. If I just do plan B, get up and shower. I mean, that's really what it is. You know, so if you're really tasked, task orientated, meaning like you really got all these tasks to do all the time. OK. And you like checking those boxes off. Why don't you make yourself a gratitude list? I am awesome. I am grateful. I am attracting more money than I ever have. I am attracting more clients. All of those things. You can flip that task orientated life into checking those other things off about yourself. And you'll be amazed after 30 days if you just talk kindly to yourself and just be nice to you because there's only one of you and you are uniquely made. You will see things unfold in your life and you'll be like, man, I never thought that I could accomplish that. Or man, I never knew that that would be able to come to me. Or all of the things that you're what ifs. You know, those are your self-talk. So what happens when you have a bad day? What does your self-talk look like? Do you default? Because most people do. Do you default to like I'm not good enough? Life isn't good. I'm so ugly. I'm too fat. You know, all of those things like I talked about in the last episode that people want to conform you into a box. That's not what life's about. This world is so big and so grand, but it's what you do with it. So you can conform yourself into sticking in that box and be skinny or not be skinny or be lazy or not be lazy or whatever the factor it is that you think that you should be. You can do that. But I can guarantee you will not be happy. Not one bit. You won't be happy. You won't be fulfilled. You won't be goal-orientated. You won't feel like you're achieving anything. When you don't feel like you're achieving something every day, there's no reason to get out of it. There's no reason to get up. If you don't have a plan, if you don't have those tasks in hand, in front of you, looking at you every day, what does your schedule look like? If you fail to plan, you'll fail to scale every single time. It does not matter. Even if your mother is planning around the nap. My girlfriend taught me this really cute phrase the other day. I laughed so hard. She said it's the nap jail because she's in nap jail right now with her son. And I laughed and I was like, that is so true. But, you know, if you are in this situation, you can use the nap jail time for you to clean the house, to do the laundry, whatever that may be. Those are accomplishments. You're keeping the house clean. You're making food for the baby, whatever that factor may be. And I'm just giving you a small example of something that's relevant in my friend's life. But, you know, you've got to commit to yourself. If you don't commit to you, nothing else around you can commit to you either. And what I mean by that is, you know, people are going to give you what you give off. So, if you allow people to treat you a certain way, they're always going to treat you that way unless you teach them not to treat you that way. I mean, I know it's hard to say, but, like, if you don't start putting healthy boundaries on your life, you know, it's hard to have positive self-talk because when there's so much noise around you, so many people and you're not focused on yourself, that can also be detrimental because what you're actually doing is listening to all these people so solely focused on all the noise that you don't have time for you. And that's when things get out of control and out of balance and you feel like, you know, how am I supposed to commit to this part of my life if I can't even have five minutes to myself? Well, you can if you prioritize you, yourself and your family and your walk with God. You know, I talk a lot about God and higher power, however you want to figure it out, but in my life today because he has saved me. And it's very difficult when I was out there for people to understand the walk that I have now, but if it wasn't for God, I would not be in this situation at all. And there are so many places in my life where I had really terrible self-talk, like, why did God have me to be born? Why was I born to this family? Why was I created? All of those things because I didn't have, I had a hole the size of the earth trying to fill it with booze and I could not drink enough. So, once I removed the booze, I still have the problem. It's kind of the same thing, self-talk. You can have positive motivation around you all the time, but if you're not really absorbing it and you're not really understanding what God has for you, it's just really fake. Honestly, you know, like the people who post all these successful memes, they're not really successful. You don't see them grinding. You don't see them getting up at 4 a.m. You don't see the fruit. You just see their stupid post and you know, right? I mean, let's be honest. I know a few folks like that where you're just like, keep going. But, you know, the moments of decision where you get to choose in your life today, like, what positive stuff you're talking to yourself, what negative comes in and see if you can combat that. Now, your body is geared for fight or flight. So, you're always going to have negativity in your brain because it is default number one, no matter what. Your brain is a 2,000-year-old machine trying to keep you safe. From Wooly Mammoth, and this is true. So, when something happens, you have to go, okay, is this happening to me? Is this happening through me? Or should I just pause? And that's really, really beneficial for me. You know, facts don't really count if you don't allow them into your life. Now, what I mean by that is, like, what people say about you. You know who you are. You know who you are in God. Then who cares what others think about you? Today, I don't worry about that. I'm not worried about what other people think about me. I'm not focused on what that outcome is, if I can make them like me or fit me into that box. I don't care. You know why? Because it doesn't matter what they say about me. People, places, and things are not important to me anymore. They used to be. I do love my family dearly. If my family calls tomorrow, I will get on a flight to go to California if they need me. Why? Because that's the type of person I am. I'm extremely loyal, almost to a default, but I've actually gotten a lot better with that, that I will cut off the fat out of my life and trim it away. But I'm always, that carries over into my business. I'm loyal to my clients. They know that I'm going to fight for them. They know they're going to get the best negotiation. They know they're going to get the best sell on their house. They know those things. They know when I list a property with me, what the steps are going to be. And I'm committed to every course of that, but I also do that daily. So, I wake up, I pray, and I meditate, right? And then I spend time with Sadie because it's all about her, guys. If you don't know Sadie, she is a five-pound toy poodle, and she's red, and she's rotten. And I'm sure her self-talk is me, me, me. So, she does it just right, and I hope you guys can do it too. So, I want you to believe you can. I want you to move some time in for yourself. Even if it's during the nap trap or the nap jail, you know, whatever that factor may be, you know, you deserve it. Even if it's five minutes in the morning before everybody gets up and you're just having your coffee, just say, God, you know, I know something good is going to happen to me and through me today, and I allow you to be in my life. If you don't call those things in, the rest of the world is going to program you to do. So, you're going to be doing whatever you see on Instagram when you wake up in the morning. And that actually brings me to something. Do you guys wake up and roll over and check your phone? Because if you do, that's a problem. Because that automatically programs your mind to start thinking about what comparison you can be. That's just really what it is. So, I challenge you today to not wake up and use your phone. To give yourself at least 10 minutes in the morning, get up, brush your teeth, take a shower, put your shoes on, go for a walk, do whatever. Put your phone on mindful, you know, don't take it out of sleep, and pray and meditate and just see how that works for you. Even make a gratitude list. I mean, I do that every single day too, but I don't know, those are a couple things that you could do to hopefully make your life better. But I'm committed to this podcast. I'm committed to you guys. And I'm committed to making this world a little bit better one day at a time. Even if it's just for 30 seconds out of somebody else's day, I try to get out of my own self by helping somebody else. So, I hope this podcast helps you guys. And I love you all. And we'll see you on the next episode. Bye!