Motivator (Lights of Coaching)

The key to coaching people is understanding their motivators. A graphic designer was offered a management position, but she didn't want it because she loved her current job. The organization showed commitment, but it created discomfort for her. It's important to ask about someone's motivators and how they feel about their work to truly understand what drives them. By bringing their motivators into coaching conversations, it creates an emotional attachment to change and increases self-awareness. This is a game changer when coaching people. When it comes to coaching people specific to their motivator, the critical component is to find out what really motivates people. Let me start off with a story to show you what this means and what pitfalls we as leaders can sometimes fall into unnecessarily. There was a good friend who was a graphic designer and she was independently motivated. She liked to work on her own and the organization was very nervous about her leaving the company. So they came to her and offered her the management position when the manager had left their company. The person had called us and was very nervous and said, I have to look for a new job. I don't want to be a manager. And she felt like she couldn't have that conversation. Why? The reason she felt like she couldn't have the conversation is because there had not been conversations around her motivator. On the other hand, there was a very positive attribute here. The organization was absolutely showing commitment. They showed value in who she was. Yet on the other hand, it created an uncomfortable situation for this graphic designer. So she went to management and said, no, I don't want to be a manager. Here's what I love about my job. I love my creativity, love working with clients. That's what my excitement is. She was intrinsically motivated. Now her friend wanted to go into management. She was extrinsically motivated. She likes graphic design, but she didn't love it. So here's the key component to understand. By asking what motivates someone, how you like to work, what's your end game, how do you feel about what you're currently doing, will give you an understanding through really good questions of what truly motivates someone. What we tend to do is lead with intentions of purpose, such as we want to promote you. Yet unnecessarily, albeit with great intentions, we've created unnecessary discord. So when you're using someone's motivator, you're bringing it into the conversation. So for example, let's take somebody named John. John wants to become a future leader, yet he doesn't handle conversations of conflict very well. He can be interruptive and almost abrasive with his teammates. You can simply say, well, John, let's assume you get really better. You really improve in handling conflict and you become an influential resource to your fellow teammates. How do you think that will help you become a future leader? By bringing in somebody's motivator into a conversation specific to an area that you're coaching, what you've done is created an emotional attachment to the thing that most people avoid called change. It also drives something that most people, estimated 80 to 85% of people significantly lack, and that's called self-awareness. Practice bringing in your understanding of what truly motivates someone is an absolute game changer when coaching people.