Lena Mo Demo TMSIDK

This is a conversation between two friends about the first episode of their podcast. They discuss their friendship, their lack of common interests, and their goal of learning from each other. They also talk about the podcast format and their intention to not offend anyone. They briefly mention their topics for the first episode and one of the friends shares her experience of scamming a vacation from work. Overall, they are excited about starting their podcast and hope to grow their media empire. Tell me something I do not know That's like the Sunday night football team We're gonna get better Hello everyone and welcome to the inaugural or as humans say it Inaugural episode of tell me something. I don't know the podcast for two lifelong friends living far too far away Talk to each other about the things that we happen to know some about whether that's a lot of a thing or a medium of a thing Probably not too many things that we know a little of we're just getting started. I Am one half of this best friendship Lena joined as ever by my Co-partner in crime and that would be mo. No You know, I'm so excited. I'm so excited to be doing this with you. I don't know how it's going. It's gonna be terrible No This feels like one of those things that like when you run into somebody that you kind of know and you're like we should go Get a car to use our time Which is Midwestern translation for I hope you're dead in a hole Before I ever see you again, let's sing we should start a podcast together Means if I never heard your voice again, it would be too soon No, except this is for real cuz every time we hang out. I'm like, I think our dynamic is hilarious And I think other people might want to listen to it. The challenge I think will be actually capturing that Because I'm realizing that This could be a failure, but maybe not You know what your mom will listen to it hi Susan She's gonna enjoy and within five minutes of the beginning shut up plug Anyway for those listeners out there Lena and I have been friends for almost 20 years and Spending truly the worst and most embarrassing parts of our lives so far And highlights, let's not forget and highlights. I only say that because at this point we're locked in I'm not sure that like if you're friends with me after Knowing me at 15 You're and we're still there If you've made it through my jeans underskirt era, we're kind of we're set for life I mean and we made it through my neon high-top Chuck's Era, I which honestly I would buy those again They can talk about the cyclic nature nature of fashion and how all the things were a child if you're coming back Let's finish the intro. Anyway, so we decided to do this podcast because Long distance best friendship is the worst mm-hmm, but also because Despite being longtime best friends Lena and I have exactly no interest in common besides Wanting to be friends with each other. And so We are perfectly represented by one Kathleen Perry song You're hot nerd. You're cold. You're yes, and you're no you're in Yes, did you say Kathleen yeah, I was going by her full legal name Kathleen and Perry Typical I was about to be like, I don't know who you're talking about Just quietly and seriously googling in the background Lena likes to do things and I like to do other things and There's not a lot of overlap despite, you know being friends. So yeah, this podcast is an effort to teach one another about each other's hobbies So that we can get closer together because we can only be closer friends from here on out That's true. We also get to zoom for a reason, you know We get to see each other and hear each other's voices I mean you're actually sending each other memes or me texting you 20 times in a row and you being like, hey, cool Wow Okay, so the podcast started just to put the Kids in the podcast started just to put put each other on trial. Hi Because it's always been true This is a very true and I feel like this is just this and more or what people are going to find as they tune into our best friendship, I Just remember in high school texting you about something and you wouldn't answer and at that point I was comfortable enough in our friendship that I was like, I'm just gonna blow her phone up Which is a far more dedication because that shit was t9. Yeah Okay, so Lena. Um, I Feel like we should explain what today's the purpose of today's episode. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes so this is our test for a into the beginnings of our not to have a cold shot, but Media empire. Yeah, this is how we started a media empire. Mm-hmm The floor of my bedroom because I got rid of the desk because I wasn't using it and now I read it You guys start somewhere, you know Amazon was started in a garage with a very small personal loan from his parents Yeah, wait, I thought it was Apple that was the garage Amazon was to see now we're getting into the territory of things I'm just talking out of my ass So that also brings up an excellent point which is to say that this podcast is Not going to be a deeply well researched analysis of certain things It's going to be us talking from our experience featuring snippets of whatever is the first thing that comes up on Google And hopefully my hope is you know for my episodes when I'm explaining something I'll do a little keyboard cat and make sure what I'm saying is true But this is definitely not you know, you're this is not cereal We do not work for New York Times in the NPR Any serious media outlet and we will only do our best to not offend from our lack of knowledge. Yes And we will try to be you know kind and generous people so we're going to talk about today, okay Well, so I think normally what we'll do is you'll have an episode or I'll have an episode Or like if it's your episode you'll talk about something You know a lot about and I'll ask you a lot of dumb and mundane questions Yeah that will demonstrate how little I know about a thing. Um, I think for today We're gonna both do little snippets of something just to get a practice and today's topics are intentionally boring Too boring to be a full episode. Wait, you really Way to sell the listener No, they're gonna be great do you struggle with insomnia and racing thoughts in the evening Well, then you should listen to this podcast full of such utter Nonsense, that is so boring. Your eyes will have no choice but to close Running through your mind will be what were these two people smoking that made them think that this would be good content for All right, yeah, so we're just gonna try this out So the first topic is Salina and I Technically chose Lena's topic, but I would say later you can talk about whatever the hell you want I think this is fine. This is fresh on the down So we might as well just get this out of here Plus then also all of our friends will know about this fabulous vacation I scammed out of work and we won't have to talk about it the next time we see the rest of them Okay, so you're telling me about this vacation you took to San Francisco, right? Yes With the I was sort of as I read this outline a mere two hours before we started doing this I was thinking about the title and I think this is something I know something about Scamming a whole week of vacation out of your work. Thank you very much What happens if your employer listens to this? No, they're not going to this is the demo. Yeah, good way good way so one of my jobs as I work for a Research office that does specifically non-invasive wearable medical devices and we test them so that when a company makes a claim that They can detect a fib or see when you're what your blood oxygen is It's a bad example because of recent legal proceedings, but whatever and so when we work with these companies sometimes they come to us here in the Midwest to train us on how to do the Studies and sometimes they like to fly one of us from the Midwest out to them Train us there and then we can bring it back to our peeps and train them and so The latter is what was happening Two weeks ago when I got to California And work in the Bay Area with a company there My first My first two tips number one bring your mom with you Because I I took her along as my personal assistant and stylist because truly I like to come through dripping and Where did I get that from? I got that from my mama and so she helps me with the drip and helps me manage my hair and It's just a good travel buddy all around and then so that's the last tip one. Bring your cool mom or cool personal assistant travel assistant advisor with you So you're getting it. You're going to California you have Susan with you How did did Apple just were they just like yeah, you can bring someone else No They They were only covering my travel expenses Okay, and so like my my flight was paid for the hotel was paid for the rental car was paid for his all under my Name, so really all we had to do was just buy Susan a ticket Yeah, and then she could come enjoy the thing so my next tip is even though you Project manage and work in a lot in an industry that requires you to have a lot of attention to detail I'm the one email about the training schedule. Don't pay that much attention on accident Because I read it that we would have training activities Monday through Friday or no Monday through Thursday And then I would have a Friday. I could new boot goof with my mom Saturday I could new boot goof with my mom and then we'd fly back to the Midwest on Sunday nope We had We had no training activities on Monday. We had a half day Tuesday half day Wednesday half day Thursday Nothing Friday So you basically just got mostly a free vacation to San Francisco With like three half days of work Mm-hmm What I have to say is that I think I was lovely as Susan in as I think I have been wronged I Think she passed down to me a sort of Midwestern farm work ethic rather than generational wealth So I believe I was like I assumed that we were gonna be there all day Working hard to like get up and ready for the next study And then I would have like a little bit of time in the evening So like go to dinner and do stuff close to the Bay Area with my mom Nope, I need to adopt to the Northern, California maybe just Apple employee timescale of Well night before I left they texted me like we're gonna start at 9 every day I was like cool pretty late for me normally And then I landed and on Sunday they were like actually what if we start at 930 And I was like, okay sick And then we started at 930 and we were like staring at each other and being like, okay I I think that's all we need to do by 1230 And then we had one meeting after an hour-long lunch that took out us till like 130 We goofed for till 2 and then I was done for the day. So really 930 to do Wow This is the work schedule. I want in my exactly and then for Wednesday, they were like, okay, we'll start at 930 again and then Everybody got caught in traffic So really didn't we didn't get started until 10 and that was a long working day because then we weren't done until 3. Oh My god. Oh my start five hours Exactly. And then on Thursday, they were like, okay, let's just straight-up start at 1030 tomorrow And Then we'll knock everything out before lunch and then be done and that's exactly what happened This is to borrow Some lingo from the youth that I'm learning, you know, I'm a teacher. So I learned things from these it's giving You signed up for a group project with that one person in college who gets a is without trying Like shows up hungover Don't get tonight precisely so my The hot strat was we landed on Sunday on Monday We went into the city of San Francisco To do all of the touristy things in San Fran which is perfect. Did you go to Alcatraz? No, you didn't go to Alcatraz. No, no, no. No, this is We thought about it because the last time that I was in San Francisco with my mom was 30 years ago when I was in utero so this trip was Partially like let's go back to all the places that you had a great view of I didn't have a great view of and and they did go to Alcatraz, but we just Didn't want to like meh, whatever I'm like thinking about you in Alcatraz and I'm you and Susan and I'm getting like two options. I feel like either the two of you would be talking about prison reform or You'd be like having too much fun telling ghost stories and imagining how you'd escape I don't want to say it's either of those options. I want to say it's a hundred percent of both What did you do the last time that I was in San Francisco I went down to a market and I ate a meat cone. That was just a cone Full of cured meat is awesome. I did not do that. I regret not doing that Cuz I love this the idea like can I get a meat cone? Can you tell I'm from the flyover states? And I'm not okay with this West Coast liberalism No, so what we what we did I have to give shout out to our friend Kevin because I Stole a little bit of his thunder With my mom when I was there a time previous for work just by myself I met up with him and his wife lovely wife my way and they took me on a like a tour of two different views Of the of the Golden Gate Bridge and other points around San Francisco So I took my mom to Fort Mason, which is all along the waterfront and you get a cool like ground-up view of the Golden Gate Bridge Which was nice because it was sort of rainy drizzly But everywhere that we went it would stop raining because we are too blessed to be stressed. Thank you very much. Oh my god Last time I was there I was soaked to the bone for four days, but so yeah everywhere we go it would Stop raining and then it would still be foggy and cool then we'd see it and then we'd be like, all right I'm to the next place and it would start raining again. We were like, oh Thank you. Whoever is upstairs So we did that and then we went we walked all along the waterfront and went over to the Museum of Fire the Palace of Fine Arts, which is that weird like in the 1900s? Someone's like what if we made a sort of Greco Roman ancient India? Ruin in the middle of San Francisco, wouldn't that be for funsies? And I mean, it's beautiful and it looks like Something out of Star Wars because it was a Lucasfilms like first studio was close to here. So he totally just ripped the palette this Palace of Fine Arts and put it on the planet Naboo And Here's our first Star Wars reference people and for those of you who have made best it wasn't me Shocking so that was wild and then I took her over to Hawk Hill Which is like you'd get to drive across the Golden Gate Bridge Into the marine the marine headlands and then it's a nice little hill Hilly drive and then you get a nice like down across view of the Golden Gate Bridge except we were solidly in the fog cloud Doesn't have a name it does I Don't remember what it is. I'm googling it. I want to say it's like Fred the fog fogger What is the fog in San Francisco called? It has a name. I swear it's called Carl appropriately call the fog Fouled with a K also Oh Spelled correctly. Thank you very much So, yeah, we were solidly in Carl We could not see anything I Was like I am so sorry that I brought you to this silly little view and then we drove about a hundred feet down From where we were and it was like a glorious sunny view of the Golden Gate, so we got a good view from that direction That's lovely. Well, then I took her over to Marshall Beach or Baker Beach Which is another it was like a sandy beachy kind of view of the Golden Gate. So you get it from three different sides It's beautiful. I highly recommend it The caveat to Marshall slash Baker Baker Beach is once you go past The rocks that are at the end of the beach the closest to the Golden Gate Bridge it turns into a nudist beach Incredible kills Californians. They really know how to live. I know I know I know I know I did not know that when I took my mother there and Conveniently, we did not go over the road Cuz that would have been I mean we were just been incapacitated laughing at Bouncing along ding-dongs as people tried to run on the beach or just floppy titties in the wind because we are children Yeah, so that was the kind of Golden Gate over heat overview and then did you do the road? Yeah, I surprised her. I didn't tell her we were gonna go drive down Lombard. You actually drove on it Oh, yeah, cuz again, it's a Monday There's nobody there except for the people that live there who I am sure are So tired of people just driving down what is essentially their driveway It's like I gotta take my kid to soccer practice. Will you people get out of here? Can't you isn't it only one directional this up or down you drive down it Which is honestly enough it was It was fine. It was real cool. I was enjoying it My mom was about to press her foot through the car jamming on her imaginary break It was super cool It was super fun to do and I would I would have totally done a lap and done it again But I think we would have both pooped our pants Honestly, what was freakier to me was driving up steep hills Cuz I was just like this little toy Kia that we're in is just going to like Flip over backwards. I would like to know if someone out there is an engineer What's the angle at which a car will start to do It's probably not any yet any street that you're going to be driving on No, you might be full hot wheels loop-de-loop at that point. I get that but I'm just curious I'm sure someone somewhere knows right? Um, did you do the trees the big trees? Yes, we did That was okay So that we kind of sort of like we did the city and then on Monday and then Tuesday We drove down to Monterey Bay went to the Monterey Bay Aquarium with like they were like we recommend you spend two hours here and there's only an hour left of this place being open and we were like fucking watch us and we powered through that whole bitch and saw all the things including the wild seals and sea otters, which are Okay, do they still sell the merch that says Harry otter and it looks like Harry Potter only as an otter They very well could have But we were walking out of the building at precisely the time It was closing and that was already shut down every single person that works there was like out. They were I would like to go home I get it. Um, I understand Friday. We were like we did the city now. Let's do the nature gulay So we drove down the one to Carmel to Point Lobos, which is a National Origin of State Park, which is mind-bogglingly gorgeous Like it's yeah, it's a whole like big piece of property that has a bunch of little like half-mile walking loops where it takes you like along the coast and then there's like a grassland route and then there's a sort of mountainy crossover and then there's a Seal a seals part. There's a protected otter part, whatever It no joke took my mom and I like a solid two hours To walk about a half a mile because we would just like shuffle four feet and then go What? Like this doesn't even make sense It's that beautiful and people were just like, you know backpacking with their camelbacks right past us like blazing by the view I'm like, oh My eyeballs are overstimulated and then we drove we kept going south and made it to Big Sur and I don't remember the name of that State Park, which we did again kind of quickly because we had gone through the windy scary bit of the one and The sun was setting and we were like, let us not do that in the dark and dark. Yeah So we got to the Redwoods and again, we're just like how do these trees get here? Why are they so big? Thank the heavens that nobody has cut them all down to turn into silly paper Or anything like that Thanks for your vacation download No problem. If anybody wants to print it out written up guide for everything that I did while I was there. It's available. Nowhere Nowhere, it's available in your head. I Just have to say I'm super jealous. I want to go to San Francisco I'm very excited for our upcoming vacation that we have yet to book. Yes You know, I'm so pale and I just I sunburn Like a red delicious Apple you and I both need SPF 2000 to maintain just a slight burn and I you know I want to look like I belong on the beach, but I can't afford the level of rich lady Beachwear that I would need to totally fit in. I see I think you're discounting our abilities of costuming and Thrifting or we just make our own frankly, do you know how easy it is to throw a caffeine together? It's like two seams and three hems. Okay, I can do that I could do that. But the other piece of this puzzle for me is that I hate I do Distinctly hate buying things that I am only gonna wear once And I'm really bad at reselling things. So why are you only you're only gonna wear a luxurious? loose woman caftan once in your lifetime I mean I feel like it's gonna be a minimum of five years between wearing and I don't really want to hold on to the caftan for Five years. I feel like you could incorporate the caftan and other beachwear items into your workwear. I Feel like my students will make fun of me Yes, but this is how you create the future generation of Insult comics you gotta give them material. So you're saying my students Deserve to be roast comedian someday and in order to do that, I need to dress like an idiot Is that what I'm hearing I was you know, when you put it like that it sounds bad in fact, I started laughing right away, but Is That not what you said, I mean I just believe that children are the future including comedy and You know, you just got to keep your show your shills. You just got to keep your skills sharp. All right, and you know Because you and I if anyone's comedy experts, it's you and me 1 Thousand percent I went to the school of comedy and I studied ha has and he he's I am a professional You are I will say you are probably 50% of the reason that I am funny today It's mostly like half hanging out with you and then the other half is like adverse life experiences And That is the recipe for giggles right there, baby, yeah Well, Lena, maybe we should start with the question what do you know about my job Right, can you yes will prove that I know more about what you do, you know, but what I do You are a teacher At an environmental education focused facility for not quite true, but continue I want to hear what the rest of what you say Well, okay. There's an outdoorsy element to the education that you provide to our Young roast comedians who have maybe had a little bit of a rough start in this life That's pretty that's fairly accurate. That's actually pretty true Yeah, boom mic drop boom mic drop, okay Well for the audience, but that's what I know But you need to give me the deets because that's something that I don't know that is something you don't know Okay. Well, I'm gonna talk about my job, which sounds boring. But this is actually I think this is a great opportunity because every time that I Tried to tell someone what my job is like I get tired and I don't want to don't want to talk Is that just a product of dealing with the well, you know, what is that a product of dealing with the youth? I think so. Also, it's kind of hard to explain and I You know, like for example, I'm picturing, you know I go home and you and I are hanging out with our friends and they're asking me about my job and I feel like in those moments There's like a well I could tell you a ton of stuff and this Conversation would get a little bit sad and I would be monopolizing it Or I can give you cursory answers So, yes, I 100% understand that vibe of Because that's what it feels like working in the ER You're like I can tell you what it's legitimately like and it's probably not as exciting, right? I could tell you that it's fine and we could be done with this or I could just entertain you with the stories of what people have had up their butts which is honestly, that's what I whenever I ask you about your ER job, that's what I That's what I'm looking. Truthfully. That's all I was focused on but And I will say, you know, it's not that my job is uninteresting. It's really not It's just just like this is actually a better venue to talk about it, you know Yes, it's an interesting I definitely have an interesting job And one that probably many people would like more light on maybe I don't know. Maybe that's self aggrandizing to say No, I don't think so. I think this is a pretty Niche area of Education but also just like a population of humans that are out there I've not had to think much or often about people that are in the juvenile system, you know exactly Which is what makes it really fascinating and I like okay, so a little bit more background Would be so I am a teacher at a residential treatment facility. That is yes It is in the woods and my students go camping quite a bit It's not quite wilderness therapy, but it's like we have a wilderness therapy component to our school, but yeah, so Yeah, so I work in a residential treatment facility with Adjudicated youth meaning kids who have gotten in trouble with the law in some way mostly not always but typically they're court-ordered to be there because of something that happened and Honestly almost always like the source the ultimate reason that they're there is that their families kind of suck even Even the ones with like really supportive families have like at some point like gone off the rails like for example I have one student currently who's like the oldest of like seven kids and Part of the reason that he is with us is because he basically became a parent in his house because his parents like Couldn't handle raising seven children on their own so they like Fair. Yeah, and so not not fair to that particular young man, but Correct. Yeah, I don't want I I would be seriously overwhelmed outnumbered by seven kids. Yeah, so that's the kind of thing that That I do but anyway, I teach science in English mostly but it's like it's super different from like working at a normal high school basically, and I could like anyway, so this is I think this is a great topic for now because I Can't really this could not I would not feel good about this going out publicly. So like to my friends I don't care about saying all these things, but I couldn't do a big episode on that I could do a big episode of being a teacher But I think like my specific workplace not a great topic to talk about but anyway, yeah The facility I work at serves kids from all over the entire state So I get kids that are coming from really far away and most of them come from just like super super small rural ranching communities and Like so small like I don't even think I can wrap my brain around how small of a world these kids come from Like it's so unbelievably rural here and so the opportunities For them to get into trouble are like so high Just endless all this space with nobody doing anything gnarly in it. Let's change that. Yeah, so You know if you're out there you're listening and you're like, how do I avoid? my children Going to a residential treatment facility. Honestly, I feel like the biggest answer is like suburban at least I Mean I hate suburbia, but I will say get your children involved in something literally anything Get them involved in it You know or it's club or the robotics club, yeah money laundering library programs Laughing at the two different options. I said money laundering you said long you said library programs Since where I'm like, I'm now I'm in like serious explain what I do mode and you're like, yes launder money Um, but anyway, yeah, so Most of them come from most of them come from broken homes and have like crappy parents some of them have some of them actually genuinely have supportive people in their life, which If you've ever Wanted to if you've ever been annoyed at your parents, but also you're a functional adult these days Thank them because they did something play them Will Smith's parents just don't understand and then stop it mid-play And go, you know what? Yeah, I mean, it's really crazy like It does it reminds me every day that I'm at work reminds me like how close every all of us are To having had in our life like real big messes of our lives and kind of sometimes the line between Where we are now and having just a fucked-up childhood is Even just like one supportive. It's a razor thin So, yeah, it's like I've had like super intelligent students whose parents are just like dinguses like one of them is in jail And the other one just like you can't hold down a job and like when you have that combination, it's just real it's just real bad, so anyway, so a Teenager doesn't know what to do with that let alone like another adult like half the time We end up talking about you know a kid who's making really good progress in our program and we're like when are they gonna get to go home and we're like We don't know because their parents Maybe Maybe they should maybe the home is not the best but they don't want to be here. So anyway My job is fascinating though And like you realize yeah how razor thin that margin is and how much? Kids just like don't know how to interact. Like I've also got another kid who's just been allowed to basically not go to school and Like sit in his room for like 20 hours a day and so you realize You just have like that kid has like his social skills are like three or four years behind But fortunately our program involves pretty much near Constant peer interaction so you get a lot of work get a lot of practice Interacting with other people right up to speed being Hello, fellow children. Yeah Hello, fellow children The boys that I work with they're just sometimes we sit around as a staff and we talk about them and you realize they're just sentient bags of water with emotions Sorry when we do our first line of merch it's just gonna be a shirt that says I am a sentient bag of water with emotions They don't know what to do with those emotions In the best-case scenario when you're in high school You are a sentient bag of the water with emotions, but with your your frontal cortex is Years away from being close to done. Yeah, so I You know then pile on top of that whatever Shitty things have happened to you and it's for these kids like just Double that and now be a sentient bag of emotions I know and their emotions are just already, you know teenagers experience emotions at a heightened level compared to adults and so like Boy, you can just it's just a recipe for like a Lot, it's just a lot does your skill or skill does your school? offer Creative coping strategies. Yeah, we do a lot of art. I also as a teacher try to incorporate Pedagogically, I try to incorporate a lot of creative creativity into my into my lessons a lot of interpretive dance Interpretive I haven't tried that yet Don't knock it till you try it because in high school in My junior year I beat English class we read a thousand years of solitude or no hundred years of solitude 100 years of solitude, which is Absolutely buck wild magical realism book We're following the same person who's time-traveling through his own family and sleeps with his own family members If I remember what any of that correctly, which I do not don't take my this is something I do not know Read I barely skimmed the spark notes of that book. I did not read it. You get good grades But you weren't exactly like the letter of the law No, I've always been a some rules are meant to be broken yada yada kind of person But the the after you read the book you had to either write a essay about it Do a presentation on some topic and I chose presentation and someone told me Dare and like said I made a joke about doing an interpretive dance of the book and someone said bullshit And I said you're on and so I did it What grade did you get do you remember I think I got an A because I just I went full send I Spare myself. I did not do the interpretive dancing class. I filmed it at home on Somebody's camcorder. Yep. Yep that burned onto a little mini disc that I did something that I don't remember and To do the whole like there was a lot of intercourse going on in that book whether it was within family members or other people And so to depict that Creatively, I had my blackberries phone call my mom's phone And then I put them both on speakerphone and put them close together. So they kind of make that weird Noise and then yeah, yeah dangled them from like From just wound out spools of dental floss and just kind of had a bang into each other Whoa? Honestly, if a student of mine did that I would be like too afraid to not give them an A Yeah, you don't want to see what creative power for revenge that brain can can devise Exact I just I think I would just I'd be like, wow, they put a clearly put a lot of effort into it Seems like they mostly understand the book and I don't want to challenge them. I'm not understanding the book I would be like, what if I didn't get it and they really do understand What if they understand the content better than me? Well truthfully, you know, I'm not the world's best English teacher. I don't have a degree in English I am fairly well read. I am a book nerd The thing is though you can assign things to your students and you're like, I'm pretty I hope this is the right choice But you can't read everything especially if you're like I want to choose between these three books It's like I don't have time to read three books Before I assign this both end and here's hoping Honestly, I just google content warnings for this book and then so long as Things aren't too violent. We're good or sexual. That's the other one. Oh, I can't I don't want to Keep that away. Have you done? the Talking about a biological organism and accidentally said orgasm No, but now that you've put that in my brain, it's for sure gonna happen I have though I have accidentally. Okay, so can you picture? Like an old-school thermometer like with the mercury. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, so imagine I just want to just you're gonna get it so quickly. Imagine me drawing one of those You didn't think that went all the way through did you did Was the bulb at the bottom maybe a little bit too big almost like it was too bold Did your thermometer curve to the left or the right? Well, I Was I drew it because I was trying to teach a kid how to read it, you know, cuz there's like the meniscus You know and I realized like as I was drawing it that it was a mistake and I'm not sure that my noticed because I think they would have laughed But I was as I was drawing it I was like I got to teach this I'm gonna say the words I'm gonna not stop talking and then I'm going to immediately erase it. I want to keep moving as fast as I possibly can So they don't stop and look at it. Yep. Yeah That was my strategy, but I do feel like that is just a rite of passage teaching Oh, yes I think that's just a rite of passage if you work in any career where you interact with the public Any career where you interact with the public whether that be the young as a teacher or The full-grown adults I do and say shit all the time to people in research appointments that I'm like Damn it mouth So, okay, so I thought also for this section that I would give you a situation From my teaching and I would ask you how you think I should have handled it because I think that's what'd be really okay okay, so This is one of my favorite stories from like my first like the first month that I was okay It was morning I was handing my students a worksheet to work on their spelling because they're terrible at spelling and so we do spelling every single day so I hand the kids piece of paper and For whatever reason he was just coming in hot that day. He did not like it and so he picks up the single sheet of paper Crumples it up into a little ball and without he was like still looking at me. I was like trying to look away Takes this ball of paper and stuffs it in his mouth and he starts to chew No, no, that's not I didn't you know what didn't see that coming. Yeah Yeah, exactly. That's most of my job. So my question to you Lena is what what do you do now? Keep in mind you're in a classroom with like four kids four or five kids and that kid a has just done this What do you do? How many other the people of the other kids notice to meet the paper? maybe like two of them and they Also don't know how to react. Oh, yeah, I mean I'm struggling in this moment. I Okay, I think Any of the options that I'm about to provide you all fall in the category of doubling down you either Give him another piece of paper While he's still chewing on the first one just to see what he does with it Because he's got two up so calling his like I bet you won't do it to a second. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah Either you're gonna eat To at least two sheets of paper today and then we're and then I'm gonna have to use real words to tell you why you Shouldn't do that and then we can move to a more positive resolution from there or You've proved your point. You're you're dissatisfied with what you want to do right now, but guess what buddy? You still got to do it. That's just being a part of the stupid society until we crack this chestnut called Capitalism, this is just the way it's got to be Um That's doubling down option. Number one doubling down option. Number two is while holding such intense eye contact You ball up and eat a piece of paper as well Suggesting I'm like, hey man, I am NOT the enemy here. I'm one of you. I'll eat the paper, too Like I get it some days. I just like I'm a cool This is the turning around hat backwards option like I get it. I if there are some days that I want to eat my paper, too But they just you know, man, I did it bro. I'm with you Down with the man. I'm not the man. Don't not know no riots, you know And then you have to the problem the only problem I see with that route the only problem is now you have two other kids that are like Or Am I also supposed to eat the paper? Is this like a test within the test? I love those suggestions now. Here's where I tell you what actually yeah No, that's exactly that's just like I Knowing you I know that you did not do either of those things You're correct. I did not I Decided to take the option of well, so here's what I've learned in all my years Working with children. Sometimes you don't need to say anything Sometimes a disapproving look is just enough. Yeah, but then but also This is a situation that is ripe for what I like to call natural consequences Where the world provides you a consequence rather than me, it's so nice. Hmm Are you thinking that him making his own toilet paper on the other end was the consequence? No, no, no, no Because I knew this kid well enough to know that this kid actually liked to get good grades and so I Decided to say nothing and I just moved on as if he'd done nothing. I just was like on to the next kid I'm just gonna keep running this lesson. Keep it push. That's not happening. And I watched him realize what he'd done realize that he actually wanted to get an A on this assignment and So he took like you see the light bulb go on in his head takes the piece of paper out of his mouth Oh, no it on his desk Starts to Uncrumple it takes out his pencil and Starts to He was that child Was not a child that was Ashton Kutcher and excellent prosthetics. You got punked That is not what happened. I Swear to God hand to God Lena that is what happened. And then later in the day. He was like, can I get a new one? You're like, yeah, I got to be like, why do you need a new one? I'm so proud of you It's not mean that's fucking brilliant you just have to make someone wholeheartedly with their whole chest It's because I got mad I started to eat the paper and then I realized That's brilliant. That's brilliant And Then you could have and then if you had gone with my option of also eating the paper You could have pulled out the paper that you eaten and given him It's got my spit on it No, yeah, this is how I say dominance the beginning of a very fruitful teacher student relationship with this kid He really hated me for a while And then he figured out that I wasn't out to get him and then he was like, she's she's fine. She's cool I'm telling you Lena. There's there's sentient bags of water with emotions and they just need love What a button that's a nice that's a nice little a solid resolution of the chords to end on So that's yeah, that's story. Number one You ready for story number two? Oh, there's more More that's worth sharing Okay, so this was actually recently and so My students are Difficult, but also they are totally normal teenagers sometimes and they say totally normal teenager things and So the other day at lunch I was listening to this conversation between this kid and another adult and this kid is like 15 16 and He's trying to figure out how to he's really into like, how do I take care of myself? He's like into learning about like Into learning about fitness and like hygiene and healthy eating and he is always talking about food and He's trying to figure out how to eat healthy. And so At lunch one day. He was talking to an adult and he's like I Think I did better with my healthy eating this morning and the other adults like oh, yeah Like would you do and he's like so He's like well so yesterday and like the last week I've had like five bowls of cereal for breakfast and I guess that's every day and he's like, I guess that's like kind of bad for you. Whoa So today volumetrically, that's not great Remember 16 boy 16 year old boy This is yeah, this is true. They're an empty a bottomless bottomless. Okay, truly bottomless pit. Anyway, so he's like, yeah So lately I've been having like four or five bowls of cereal and today instead I tried to make a healthy choice and I had like three pancakes with peanut butter and syrup on them Okay, I you know, I mean It's not necessarily a forward but like a lateral I Get I guess it's I guess that's more protein It's definitely more of a peanut butter definitely more for more of a complex carbohydrate. That's good Yeah, so he was I mean I you know what, honestly, I He may have been right because we have to address the lie that we were sold As children of the 90s and early thousands is that like frosted flakes were part of a healthy breakfast? Yes. Yes, that's exactly I'm talking about is part of a healthy breakfast the way that you the weight You don't you don't catch that bit with the not full frontal lobe part so you just think if I have the four or five bowls of cereal if It's part of a healthy breakfast that I'm probably set if I have all five No, they're talking about at the part when you have a whole ass other good breakfast. Yeah No, it's like if you eat a healthy breakfast and then you also eat frosted like and then have cereal Yeah, it's a part of a healthy breakfast. It's a part of a full nutrition So I don't I remember those images would be like a bowl of cereal with like and like a Thing of orange juice and another orange for some reason and that other show googling this I wonder if there's any pictures online so he may have you know, just like early cracked the code of like Wait a minute. It's a part of a happy breakfast. So it by itself is not a healthy breakfast So I have to go to the pancake Okay, I'm actually looking at these pictures these are priceless, okay, so there's one That's Captain Crunch. It's a box of Captain Crunch Also, clearly this is all it's like the background looks like it's straight out of a picture book. So this is like 90s Yep 90s art. Okay It's Captain Crunch. There's a bowl of cereal full glass of milk half glass of orange juice full bowl of fruit looks like two apples and a bunch of grapes and then Yeah, the whole you deleted the Captain Crunch from that. That is your bed That's like I was gonna say like well, that's even more than I like I currently eat toast with peanut butter and fruit like a quarter of what is pictured is like what I eat for breakfast oh I'm just I'm seeing spills from the Cheerios ad where it was like the grandma feeding a baby in the high chair and having some real emotional flashbacks and they're all like this it's cereal full glass of juice or milk of plate of fruit and Butter toast that is what seems to be the formula here Yes. Yeah, that is the actual good breakfast there. The cereal is completely sidebar to all of that This is incredible. Okay So I you know what I you know, I think he was correct not great and I'm not a registered dietitian So I don't know if that is like the perfect Expression of the healthiest breakfast, but is it moving in the right director direction? There's a moving in the right direction from four to five bowls of cereal a day Not that much dairy is just not good. So Kiddos learning how to you know be a What did you what did you say? Did you did you chime in you and you were like excellent work? Um, so I did not chime in in this situation because he wasn't really talking to me I think the adult he was talking to was like, oh dude, like that's not as good as you think it is Maybe like pick I think they said pick syrup or peanut butter. Not both Okay I think I I feel like he just dashed ratatouille dreams what? You know like this that's better than four or five bowls of cereal and even if it's incrementally better so you're like and plus like you gotta have a little balance in life like Like I get you get to have a little sweet with a little savory you get to put that all on a pancake and maybe That's not the choice you make every day, but that's a good but that is That is a good choice. I have think I have done a full 180 on my opinion of the statement So far, I also I pretty sure I forgot to mention they were chocolate chip pancakes Which I think is an important detail Damn it. I mean I Do think this child was discovering what I also discovered around that age, which is Cereal is like a terrible breakfast. Generally, it's pretty mid. It's got pretty much nothing It's excellent dry snap. Oh, I like it for bedtime. I Like the magic spoon No, seven Sundays chocolate cereal And I just I fill a mug of it just dry and then I sort of eat drink it out of the mugs delicious It's a great thing to have in trail mix it's a great after-school snack I prefer it actually in the afternoon That to the morning but a before-school thing that's what I would get hungry before I got out of my car from my commute I Just there's nothing There's not a lot there. Hmm Not a lot to tide you over but also like I'm not gonna laugh a good chocolate chip pancake that that slaps That's just joy. That's just good joy. And who doesn't need a little bit of that going into their day And see like, you know what if I were okay now wait, hang on now if I were that kid and I were in his shoes what breakfast would I make for myself? This is an important question. That is this mm-hmm I Would be in that same wheelhouse see like I feel like he didn't do it he didn't go wrong Because I would have to made myself a pancake cuz it's pretty easy to slap that together And I would have been like yes chocolate chips cuz duh. Yeah also and yes syrup There's a I will say, you know learning to eat healthy aside. That's a lifelong journey truly Mm-hmm. There is something to be said for Occasionally choosing something that as you said brings you a lot of joy in the morning Yeah, it's called Blanc or balance. So anyway, yeah, that's my story. That's my work story. So Any further questions before I wrap up my portion of this episode? No I feel like I get really lost in the sauce of breakfast there and I kind of anything critical I had I am I just have a I have a screen still of a Jetson cereal commercial up on my laptop and I'm pretty I'm in it now. Yeah Jetson cereal Yeah, also who came up with what's the cookie cookie crisp? cookie crisp Cookie crisp that is not part of a balanced breakfast regardless if you have a full fucking fruit plate In in in a whole good breakfast you have cookie crisp and it deletes the nutritional factor of the rest of it everything you ate Yeah, and this I also think this is like before well also we need Shred lightly though, cuz I fuck with cookie crisp. I mean, it's delicious. But also, can you imagine like What well you probably remember walking through the cereal aisle and just being like Eyeballs to eyeballs with the wolf from cookie crisp. And how do you have a child resist that? Basically you can't basically we need more consumer protections for children is my I Feel like we've reached the point Where we must do our closing Yes, I couldn't figure out. I was like, I feel like we need something. That's that we do at the end of every episode We haven't figured out how yet do it. I Feel like we need it almost used to be like a like a so now here's something I do know And it's sort of a summary and it can be a legitimate takeaway or it could be a goofy like When in doubt do an interpretive dance for a school project performance. Oh, yeah, I like that one yes, exactly and my takeaway would be Let the kids either eat paper or eat pancakes. I Think we need to record our outro now. Oh Yeah That was the first episode of many many many episodes of our podcast It has been this has been a pleasure to our friends who are listening to this You will be receiving a Google form with which to submit your feedback If you could feel if you could fill out I would just help us tailor our content or advertisers to our contact Lee I Would like to know what we did well and what we did poorly what we can improve on feedback is important. We're gonna grow but anyway This has been Tell me something. I don't know. Yes, Lena Get your waitress tip your waitresses make good choices. We're clean underwear. Don't do drugs without me Cheers