EP3 Of Sit Down With Marlise(FT. Ms. Baez)

In this conversation, Marley talks to Ms. Bias about community violence and its connection to mental health. Ms. Bias is the Workplace Learning Manager at DSA and has worked in education for many years. They discuss the different populations of students they have worked with, including Spanish-speaking students at Chelsea High School and Cape Verdean students at DSA. They also touch on domestic violence among teens, which is often kept hidden, and the role of mental health in relationships. Ms. Bias emphasizes the importance of maintaining boundaries, not relying on social media for relationship guidance, and the impact of mental health on both individuals and their friends. She also mentions red flags to look out for, such as controlling behavior and isolating oneself from others. Ms. Bias believes that having mentors and support staff in schools is crucial for providing resources and support to students who may be at risk. Hey everyone, welcome back to Sit Down With Marley. And today I'm here with Ms. Bias and we're going to talk about community violence and a little bit about how mental health plays a role on it. So what's your role at DSA? So I'm the Workplace Learning Manager at DSA. In my role I support students in looking for employment and internship opportunities, also helping develop their workforce development skills so that they're ready to enter the workforce once they leave Dearborn. And she's also trying to be a personal therapist. And besides DSA, where else have you worked? Before coming to DSA I worked at Chelsea High School as the Internship and Schoolwork Manager for seven years and prior to that I worked as the Outreach Worker for an after school program for three years, providing students with resources and connecting them to different opportunities outside of school. Have you always worked in education? Yes, I've worked in schools but not directly as a teacher, more as a staff person or support staff person. I know that you also went to school in Chelsea High School and you also worked there. How is it different from DSA? So I would say the biggest difference is the population of students that I'm serving. At Chelsea High School there was a large number of students that were newcomers from El Salvador, Guatemala, Honduras, and even the island of Puerto Rico. Most of our students were Spanish speakers and here at DSA we're looking at a large population of Cape Verdean students. And the difference is really in the culture and the different cultural backgrounds that we bring to the school. So you also spend a lot of time with the students, so have you ever seen domestic violence in teens? It's rare but it does happen. I think when it comes to domestic violence or like violence in relationships, a lot of the times high school students have ways of being discreet about the violence that happens because most of the time it happens during school hours and not at home. So I think in the population of students that I work with in Chelsea, a lot of the times violence between partners was something that was really kept in the rough, especially students that were newcomers and were afraid that if they disclosed anything, any type of violence or what was going on, they feared being deported. I think a lot of the times when we look at violence or negligence between two individuals in a relationship when they're youth, it comes into play in a different manner. And one thing that was just put to my attention is students sharing their locations with their partners and that can be really, really toxic. They have so much control over where they go, who they're with, and it was just by having access to their phone and where they're located. So I think that youth violence and especially with partners is something that's real but it's rarely reported or rarely seen because the people that can report it or are more exposed to it in the schools are teachers and I don't think that they have the training or really don't see the impact that these little incidents or little behaviors have in the overall relationship between two people. Is there any advice that you would give to them? So I think that one of the things that's really hard as teens is maintaining boundaries. And I think that's really important, especially when you're in a relationship with another youth, maintaining boundaries, being truthful, and not letting social media or social media ways how they will perceive relationships be their guide on how they take on their own relationship. Because what you see on social media is only a glimpse of it and it's not like the whole story or all the perspectives of the situation. And also, do you think that sometimes mental health plays a role in the domestic violence, community violence? Definitely. I feel like sometimes the trauma that we bring and the way we go about situations come from where we're brought up, who we're brought up by, and the way we deal with those situations and mental health really plays a role in every relationship that you engage in. So if a student is not in the right headspace, it obviously impacts their partners and even the people that they're friends with. A lot of the time, teens disclose to their friends like they're suicidal or they're cutting themselves and they don't report it because the friend that's in these acts sees it as betrayal if they say something. And I think that we all need to be educated on mental health and the impact and the resources available for students that are engaging in those types of activities. And what would you say is a red flag? So I think a red flag would be lots of stuff. There are students that only stick to their group of friends or their boyfriends, and that's all they're with and that's all they do. And that can be really toxic. I think also some red flags is just the control that some students might have with their partners. And that means like they can't talk to anybody. They can't sit in the same table as this person. They can't be giving out phone numbers to other people. Nowadays, that's something that's seen normal in the youth, but that's really toxic. That's toxic energy and that's something that is not really acceptable as adults. And I think it shouldn't be acceptable in youth either. And like there's some of the times like there's like students that be outside with like children, the violence that like always trying to fit in with the students that like that's in the gang and things like that. Do you think if they had somebody to talk to or things to do after school, like do you think that that would be helpful? Like it wouldn't let them go without that? I think, yeah, I think that having a mentor, having a person to talk to and confide to, having a person that's going to be able to provide you with resources makes a difference. Sometimes people take the streets just because they want a feel of a family that they don't have at home. And it's really important for support staff like myself and the dean and the assistant head of schools to create relationships with students and be their person in the building for them to be able to go to if they need help or if we can provide them with a list of resources or guide them really makes a difference. Okay, so that was it for today. Thank you for taking your time to come here to sit down with Marlies and have a little conversation with me. Thank you. You're welcome.