PRIORITIES

The speaker reflects on the questions of why they can't achieve what they want and why they are not a priority in the lives of certain people. They realize that the more honest and useful question is why they don't prioritize certain things themselves. They discuss the importance of priorities and how making something a priority leads to accomplishment. They also explore the impact of ego, doubt, and uncertainty on pursuing goals. The speaker asks for the listener's thoughts on priorities and not being a priority in others' lives. Have you ever been in a situation where you're just beating your head, wondering, why can't I do this? Why can't I make this happen? Why can't I? You know, and then, whatever it is that's preying on your mind, well, I was asking myself that question the other day, why can't I have the life that I really want? Why can't I just go and do the things that I really want to do? I soon realized that, why can't I, is probably a dishonest question, and it's certainly not the most useful question, and I kind of realized that a more honest question, and definitely a more useful question is, why don't I? And that got me thinking about priorities, in fact, I have been thinking about priorities quite a bit lately, and it's fair to say that that kind of thinking about priorities was prompted by, you know, a hurtful realization that I am not a priority in the lives of certain people, people that I love very deeply, and care about very deeply. Something that I had assumed, you know, would always be the case, that I would be a priority in their lives, that, you know, that I would never have to think twice, or they would never have to think twice about making me a priority in their lives, and it's taken me a while to really get it, to really get that I'm pretty low in their list of priorities. Now, let me be clear, it's nothing that they've said, no, on the contrary, they've said in a number of ways that they do value me, and I do mean something to them in some way, because I am after all there, and I won't say what, but that's the role that I have. And I guess, if I were being honest, it's a role that I've come to realize over the years, is an act that's mostly in name. So the reason why I feel that I'm so, you know, the bottom run of priorities with these people is mostly because of their actions and their decisions, the choices that they've made, and many of which have not included me, and I know that I need to be at peace with that, and that means really bearing no anger or resentment or bitterness, or even feeling sorry for myself, because I know that none of that will ever give me the peace that I want, because you see, peace does not coexist with these emotions, not when these emotions are active and festering because of the attention that I'm giving them, but that said, peace, a peaceful mind is prepared to meet each one of these unpleasant emotions peacefully, and that happens when I drop the judgment and the story that I have built around these emotions and these thoughts that I have. I even, you know, might say that if there ever was an enemy of peace, it could be judgment, but as soon as I say that, I see my words and my thinking right there, because peace knows nothing about having enemies. So anyways, priorities. Why was I thinking about priorities, aside from an egoic reaction to other people's choices and decisions, and how my ego is neurotically obsessed with taking it all so personally, and that's the problem, isn't it, that anything that happens, you know, and that causes us to feel bad, is always because we've taken it personally. Well, I was thinking about priorities because when I started asking myself, why don't I do certain things, the things that I think I want to do, and feel that I want to do, I realized it was because, honest to goodness, truth here, they were not important enough priorities for me. Yeah, ouch. It's not the nicest discovery to make, is it? But it's an honest one. And it's helpful, because the simple fact is, if something is important enough and meaningful enough to you, you would make it a priority, right? And making something a priority means making it happen, whatever it takes, or however long it takes. And you know what? I've noticed that when I've actually made something a priority, I get it done, and often in far less time, and with far less effort than what my ego would have tried to convince me I would take. Yeah, all that programming running in the subconscious about how hard it would be, and how long it would take, and how misguided I was, or how, wait for this one, how egoic it was to pursue something or make something an actionable goal. Yeah, the ego can appear to self-reflect and call itself out. But that's a big, that's a big ploy, a big trick, another one of those delusions. And all of this, you know, doubt and uncertainty and all the reasons why not, all of this eating away at my natural, my, you know, spontaneous, natural, effortless enthusiasm and excitement and eagerness and belief in myself to the point that I don't even get started. Or if I do, I sort of run out of seeds, or interest, or conviction, or faith. So, yeah, priorities, what are your thoughts about them? Do you agree that if we really want and value something, we will make it a priority? That it's not a question of why can't I, but why don't I? And I'll throw in another one, what about not being a priority in the lives of people you care about deeply? Have you experienced that? What do you do about it? I'd love to hear your thoughts. In the meantime, much love, and may your heart beat to the rhythms of peace.