Episode 8 The Rise of Incivility in The Workplace: Causes and Consequences

The rise of incivility in the workplace is a major issue with consequences for communication, relationships, and mental health. It is fueled by factors such as political polarization and social media. Incivility can lead to breakdowns in communication and toxic environments. Leaders can take a proactive approach by modeling good behavior, being present in meetings, and publicly praising employees. Creating a culture of respect and empathy is crucial, through learning programs and HR policies. Addressing incivility requires effort from individuals, organizations, and society as a whole. Welcome to Coachonomics Presents Podcast, a part of the ECS Network. I'm your host, Laura Perez Erfarth. I'm a management consultant and certified executive coach, and I've been consulting businesses and coaching executives for over a couple of decades. Today we're talking about the rise of incivility in the workplace, causes and consequences, the emotional toll of incivility, and how rude behavior affects your mental health. In a time when technology has connected us more than ever before, fostering a global village where ideas and cultures collide, one would expect an environment of understanding, cooperation and harmony, right? Well, regrettably, the reality is far from this paradigm. Instead, we're confronted with a pervasive culture of disrespect, hostility and divisiveness that infiltrates every aspect of our lives. From the halls of power to the virtual realms of social media, we've witnessed the erosion of civility in our public and private interactions. Politicians engage in bitter personal attacks rather than engaging in constructive dialogue. That's a novelty. Once heralded as spaces for connection and knowledge sharing, online platforms have become a breeding ground for hate speech, cyberbullying and the spread of misinformation. This epidemic of incivility manifests itself not only in our digital interactions but also our day-to-day lives. Rudeness has become the norm. How sad is that? With individuals prioritizing their own interests at the expense of others, basic acts of kindness, courtesy and respect are overshadowed by self-righteousness, intolerance and an alarming lack of empathy. Incivility refers to rude, disrespectful or impolite behavior that violates social norms and even undermines the standards of civil society. So it can take many forms including insults, name-calling, shouting, interrupting, belittling or even mocking someone. Incivility can occur in various settings such as the workplace, educational institutes, social media, politics and public spaces. One of the consequences of incivility is that it can lead to a breakdown in communication relationships. When people engage in uncivil behavior, they're less likely to listen to opposing viewpoints and more likely to become defensive and entrenched in their own positions. This can lead to a vicious cycle of coarseness where each side becomes more extreme in their viewpoints and less willing to compromise to find common ground. Another consequence of incivility is that it can lead to a toxic and stressful environment. So when people feel disrespected and undervalued, it can negatively impact their mental health and well-being. This can lead to an increase of stress, anxiety and even depression which can affect their productivity and their ability to perform their duties including disruption to their clear thinking and decision-making. So when an individual is consumed with anxiety, their thinking and rationality become a bit clouded and it becomes increasingly challenging to discern reality versus the perceived reality of a situation. A couple of years ago, I was working with a client who hired me to partner and coach some of their senior leaders. They were preparing to launch a hellacious financial goal and just needed to make sure that their leadership was prepared for this. I started with a couple of leaders, one in particular I'm going to call out and I'm just to protect his name, I'm going to call him Stephen. Stephen is direct in nature, he's very charismatic and very driven. He has a lot of responsibilities, he leads a number of teams and is in charge of several departments. He in one of his direct reports, I'm going to protect her name and call her Isabel. We're in the middle of a discussion and they were reviewing and talking about her performance and also a specific issue that had come up. During Stephen's conversation with Isabel, he told her, well, they all hate you. The team just hates you. This took Isabel by surprise, needless to say, and she was clearly upset as she shared this event with me. When I asked Stephen about it, I asked him what he was thinking when he made this statement, trying to find out where his mind, where his head was at at that time. And he said that he was just trying to get her attention and set her straight. His tactic didn't work. What it did do is it drove a wedge within the relationship and Isabel lost trust in Stephen as a leader. Moreover, discourtesy can also have a rippling effect on others who witness it. Observing others being uncivil can create a culture of incivility where such behaviors become normalized and accepted. This can further erode the social fabric and lead to a breakdown in social coherence. There are several factors that contribute to incivility, such as political polarization, social media, where we've seen an explosion of rudeness, including stress and lack of empathy. Political polarization, for example, can lead to dehumanization of the opposing sides and a willingness to engage in uncivil behavior towards them. On the other hand, social media can provide a platform for people to engage in uncivil behavior without the normal social constraints in a face to face interaction. According to Christine Pearson, who is a professor of global leadership at Thunderbird School of Global Management, and Christine Porath, a professor at Georgetown University, there is a price to pay for incivility, which is costly. And here's what they have to say. Several years ago, they polled thousands of workers about how they've been treated on the job. Approximately 98% reported experiencing uncivil behavior. At least half of respondents stated they were treated rudely at least once a week. The cost chips away at the bottom line. Nearly everybody who experiences workplace incivility responds in a negative way. In some cases, overtly retaliating. Employees are less creative when they feel disrespected and some get fed up and just exit the company. Pearson and Porath state that incivility damages customer relationships. Their research further showed that people are less likely to buy from a company with an employee they perceive as rude, whether the rudeness is directed at them or at another employee. Witnessing just a single unpleasant interaction leads customers to generalize about other employees, the organization, and even the brand. So at this point, you might be asking, what can leaders do to take a proactive approach? Let's start by modeling good behavior as a best practice. In a survey conducted by Pearson and Porath, they stated that 25% of managers who admitted to having behaved badly said they were uncivil because their leaders, their own role models, were rude. If employees see that those who have climbed the corporate ladder tolerate or embrace uncivil behavior, they're more likely to follow them. My point here is power down your cell phones, your iPads during meetings and pay attention to questions and follow up on promises. Additionally, if there is a meeting nearby, make sure you physically attend as opposed to sitting in your office and opting to zoom into the meeting. That sends the wrong message to colleagues and direct reports as you're supposed to be a model of good behavior. Leaders set the tone. So be aware of your actions, your communication style, your body language, even how you're perceived by stakeholders and colleagues, especially when the heat gets turned up and work becomes even more challenging. It is easy to blurt out something that you just might regret later. Another way to create a culture of respect and highlight the best in employees is to publicly praise and appreciate all stakeholders, no matter how small or how big the wins. I've coached clients to set time aside to meet with their teams. So this is a place where they can set the tone and the expectations that incivility is unacceptable. Discuss the consequences and also allow the time for employees to state their concerns and provide feedback. And also for those employees who may not feel as confident or comfortable sharing their experience in a group setting, allow some time for a one-on-one conversation with that employee to state any concerns that they might have privately. Additionally, promoting civility as a core value in the workplace is important to address incivility. It can be done through learning development programs where stakeholders are taught and reminded to value respect and empathy for others. It can also be done through partnering with your human resources department and creating policies and guidelines that promote civility in the workplace. So to summarize, incivility is a major problem in modern society that has far-reaching consequences. It undermines communication, relationships, and social coherence, leading to toxic and stressful environments. Addressing incivility requires a concerted effort from individuals, organizations, and society to promote civility as a core value and create a culture of respect and empathy. Well, folks, that's it for this episode of Coachonomics Presents. If you're interested in being a guest or you're a subject matter expert, please go to my website, www.epiphanyconsultingsolutions.com, and submit your request under the Let's Chat link. You can also find me on my LinkedIn page under Laura Perez Earhart or my website, epiphanyconsultingsolutions.com. We hope the content will give you sparks of inspiration. And if you love and learn from this show, head forward and share my podcast with your colleagues and friends. I'm Laura Perez Earhart. Until next time, stay safe and live well.