how to follow-up with families - full interview with peggy jansen

The speaker, Maggie Jansen, has been working at Gibnish Family Life Celebration Homes for over 30 years. She discusses how the funeral home industry has evolved and how families are now more educated and have more opportunities to go outside the family business. She emphasizes the importance of tapping into the pre-Need market and not waiting for the phone to ring. Maggie talks about the benefits of pre-arranging funeral services, such as emotional relief for the family and locking in the cost at today's prices. She also mentions how the funeral home staff is trained to subtly introduce pre-Need discussions during the arrangement process. Maggie explains her role in making follow-up phone calls to families after services to check in on them and address any concerns. Overall, she credits the success of the funeral home to the leadership and mindset of the company and the importance of having the right people in place to support grieving families. I'm Maggie Jansen, and I've been with the Gibnish Family Life Celebration Homes for over 30 years, you know, pre-Needfield, yes. Life Celebration by Gibnish Homes. Sure. I mean, just like every other business, the funeral home industry has evolved. And the days of ownership of the funeral home then getting passed down through the generations, it's not to say it doesn't happen, but it's not as frequent as it used to be. Families are more educated with different fields and exposed to more, so they have more opportunity to go outside the family business. I just find it unusual that people don't fall into the pre-Need more, because as I said, it's not like the old days where there was the one local funeral home and everyone used it, and you really didn't even have to advertise, because if it was the funeral home within a few mile block radius of your home, that's what you were going to use. Where nowadays, face it, you know, you can Google just about anything, you know, how to buy a casket, how much should a funeral cost? And people are more and more educated, so you need to go with the time. Which brings me to why I can't imagine that if I was the owner of a funeral home, I would not tap into the pre-Need market more, which means you can't just wait for the phone to ring anymore. Those days are gone. Not to say you don't get your loyal families that do that, as we do, but I'm fortunate enough to work with someone who, from the day I met him, has been more entrepreneurial, and you wouldn't know that he's a funeral director because he thinks so much outside the box, and that's John Gibnish. He really, from the day I met him, has instilled that we are not going to be that typical funeral home that waits for the phone to ring. We are going to see what we can do to do as much community outreach as we can to get families to know we'd like to meet with them before they need us, not when they need us. And we have been successful at it. As I said, I wouldn't be sitting before you with 30 years of experience had John not set us up for success. And one of the easiest ways that when we talk about pre-Need, I don't know how many people realize the difference. That means when you need us, you are at need. Pre-Need is when you're pre-thinking about things, and you want to try to make things easier for your family. So there's a couple of reasons, obviously, why pre-Need makes sense. One would be, I guess the question to ask yourself is, even yourself, if today something were to happen and you would need our services, who would have to make that call to a funeral home? And if you cannot comfortably say, oh, I have everything in order, my son, my daughter, whomever, knows exactly where everything's at, and they're going to just make a call to a local funeral home, everything's already set up, then you need to talk with us. Because if not, again, the first thing you're going to do is take away the emotional burden to your family. How many people really sit down at Thanksgiving dinner and say, hey, mom, do you want to be cremated or do you think you want full service? It's not really a conversation anybody wants to have. So that's why we are encouraging people to talk about these things now. So the first would be the emotional, and the second would be the financial. There's huge benefits in pre-arranging. Number one, you lock it into the cost of today. And just like everything else, funerals will go up. It's just inevitable. So you lock it into the price of today. Number three would be, it really isn't just one call does it all. Once someone pre-arranges with us, we have an excellent chain of command that happens. They'll be sent a welcome letter. They'll be sent these little, they look like charge cards, but it has all your pertinent information as far as your name and where to call so that one, you can give to whomever's going to take care of things for you in time of need, and you'll keep one in your wallet. So again, it really is to make it easier for when that time occurs. So those are some of the benefits, just some of the benefits of pre-arranging. Well, if I could just to kind of lay the groundwork, because you're correct, you can't think about it. Pre-needs are their most tragic loss, and I can't be following up, you know, and talking about, hey, would you like to plan your funeral? So let me just back up for a moment and say that one of the things that's instilled in us as a company is the groundwork for pre-needs is laid at at-needs. And I'll say that because all of our funeral directors are trained so that when they are making arrangements with a family, they will touch upon pre-needs very delicately throughout the process. There might be an opportunity to say maybe when they're comforting the person who just lost someone, I know this is difficult, believe me, we're here for you, we're going to take you by the hand and lead you in every way. In fact, we not only take care of our families before, during, and after, but to that note, Peggy Jansen is going to give you a call after services a few weeks out just to see how you're doing and check in on you and make sure everything was okay with the services. That's laying the groundwork. My phone call is not going to mean anything if they didn't do that. They'll mention my name, they'll mention that I will be calling. They'll also mention on a soft touch, I know this is so difficult right now. I can only imagine what you and your family are going through. However, I wanted to let you know that something that we do for our families is still at an ERG. So obviously right now we're here to talk about your loved one, your husband, but in the future if it's something you ever want to get on file at the funeral home, you can see that it would really make a difference to have had some of these things on file at the funeral home so that we're not having to deal with it now at such an emotional time. So again, before I get into how I make that phone call, I need to lay the groundwork on how our staff is trained to lead me into being able to make a successful call. I mean, honestly, that comes from the higher ups in the company, the Dan Selecky and the Chris Selecky and the John Gibnish. They are very, very, very selective in whom they hire on to become part of the Gibnish family. And the reason I say it like that is, you know, we've been around since the late 1920s. And again, I can't emphasize enough, we're not your typical funeral home. I'm not sure how much our success comes from leadership and the company that they built or just that this is some cookie cutter information that others can use. I like to think the beginning part, because you're only as good as the people you surround yourself with. And John is really good about making sure that everyone has the same mindset. We're not here just to provide funeral services. So I think that that, you know, getting back to your question, how do we get everybody on board? Well, they wouldn't be with us if they weren't on board. Put it that way. Exactly. I mean, you have to think especially, this is such a crucial thing. Think about it. What is one of the worst days of your life, if not the worst, when you lose someone you love? So if you don't have the right people in place, think about, you're going to have people that this is the last thing they want to do is be burying someone that they love. So you cannot give them an inch of opportunity to pick apart any of the services. Because again, they're angry with the world right now. They've just lost their loved one. Well, and we'll get into more about what my phone calls go like, so you'll see what I'm talking about. Okay. So normally, I wait maybe three, four weeks at the longest. And the reason for that, that might seem like, oh, geez, three, four weeks, that's not really that long. We actually were making them two to three months out. And that's years and years ago. The reason we've shortened the time span from when I call after the time of services is more and more cemeteries, unfortunately, are tapping into, calling upon families days after services, if not the day of services, you'd be surprised. At least that's what my families are telling me. So I don't want to get them confused. I want to make sure that they know it's the funeral home calling and what our purpose is. So again, three to four weeks out, I will pick up the phone and a typical call would go like this. Hello, Mrs. Jones. This is Peggy from the Smith Funeral Home, and I just wanted to see how you're doing. And I listen. And that's the biggest part that I can do of my job, is listen, because in that short period of time, I will find out what their mindset is, how they're feeling. I have talked with everyone, full gamut, from the woman who can hardly hear me because she's on a cruise ship spending her husband's money that she couldn't stand, to the woman hysterically crying who just lost her 103-year-old mother. So again, two family members who unfortunately have suffered a loss through a suicide. So again, it's hard for me to take my brain and put it into someone, but I will tell you, if you approach the call properly, it should go like this. Hello, Mrs. Jones. This is Peggy Janssen from the Smith Funeral Home. I'm just calling really to see how you're doing. Listen. Sometimes it's 10 minutes I listen to. Sometimes it's about an hour. Then I will say to them, I also wanted to call to make sure everything was okay with the services. And I'm very happy to say, no exaggeration. 99.9% of the time, I hear, it was beautiful. I've never attended services like that, what a celebration of life. And again, that goes back to how we perform our services. Occasionally I'll get, oh, I didn't get enough prayer cards or the limo wasn't big enough to fit everybody. We could have used two. And that's when I will let the family know that their concerns were heard and that I will address them. And that really makes a difference because I don't know about you, but I've had funerals that I've had to provide for family members, not knowing to get in this family prior to this time. And I didn't get a call after the funeral. Once the bill was paid, that was it. So that's another way that we're unique. We reach out afterwards, before, during, and after. Again, we would say, hello, Mrs. Jones, how are you doing? Just wanted to make sure everything was okay with the services. I wanted to also let you know that we continue our care. So we'd like to pay you a visit. We put something together that we really think your family would benefit from, and that is our family packet. And then I go into exactly what that is. Families are usually thrilled to receive it. And then I set the appointment convenient for them, morning, afternoon, evening, at their work, at home, or at our funeral home. What is the family packet? You're going to ask me, what is the family packet? Well, just to show you how that's transitioned as well. And again, any funeral home can use what is unique to them. This is what works for us, and has worked for us for years and years. But back in the day, we used to even do something where we planted a tree in the memory of the loved one, and we would take a plaque out and present that plaque to them. We just found that this is more cost-effective, number one, and actually, to be honest with you, way more useful, although the tree planting might have been a sentimental touch. What we provide is the family packet, which is consistent of an emergency record guide, which is something that I would say, Mrs. Smith, you know what you just went through in the loss of your loved one, and all the paperwork that's involved. And then they say, usually, oh, you're not kidding. I never realized that with the death of a loved one comes so much paperwork, and nothing I feel like doing right now. And I say, I agree with you 100%. And that's why I'm calling, because I don't know your family's dynamics, but I can tell you that most families tell me the same thing, which is, it's hard enough to lose a loved one, but then to have to deal with all the paperwork is more than overwhelming. So we're here to help you at least solve that problem, and that would be with our family packet. It's an organizer. It's to help you keep all of your papers and documents in order, so that should an emergency arise, whether it be a flood or something medical, anybody can step in and help you. And who wouldn't want that? Most of the people I'm talking to have tons of paperwork on the table they don't even know what to do with, and this kind of will get them started in the right direction to at least have the peace of mind that with their own affairs, they can feel comfortable. We really are calling to see how they're doing, making sure everything was okay with the services, and then following up with something that we feel can help them. And when our counselors go out to meet with the families, the first thing they do is listen as well, is really just, how are you doing? And sometimes folks haven't seen anyone since funeral services, so maybe they do need just to let a good cry out or talk or ask about a support group. And again, that's where we are different. We're really not there just to do the aftercare about the family follow-up, but we look around. If we see now that maybe mom was taken care of by dad, who's now passed, and mom's now struggling to get around, we offer help in other ways. We have a whole pocket full of folks that we work with that are in different businesses that would provide services. So we might say, hey, I see mom's having a hard time getting around, and you shared with me that dad used to take care of her, and now he's gone. Do you have a game plan for that? Can we help? And if we hear a need for help, we can say, listen, we work with such and such a company, and they provide services. Maybe we could get mom a ramp or a walker. So really, we are the full gamut. We really are about helping the people. And then, of course, leading to pre-need, at that first point, we really are just checking to see how they are, making sure everything's OK with services, finding out any other needs they have. And then we will present the family packet and the fact that you know what you just went through. This is a tool to help you should an emergency arise in any way. Your neighbor, your family can grab it and help assist you at a time of need. And then that usually leads to them saying to us, you're not kidding. I would never put this on anybody else. I can't tell you what I went through taking care of this for my husband. I already told my daughter that, you know, I'm going to have everything in place so she doesn't have to go through what I did. It's a no-brainer. It really is. I mean, anywhere from somebody who says, you know what, let's get this done. I mean, I think I want to do exactly what my husband did. Do you happen to have his file? Can you get a copy of it? Then we, of course, have the family member who says, you know, I just can't even think about this right now, but I know that it makes sense and it's something I should do. And you call me back and that's when, you know, they'll report back to me. I'll put it in the callbacks and calls. But again, we're always in constant contact too. So even if right now we might provide the service and do a family follow-up and nothing comes of it, there is no sales pitch on that family follow-up visit. It truly is what it is. Again, if you were someone just listening to this and you had just been provided services and then we care enough not to come out to pick up the check, that's all been taken care of. That's nothing to do with us. We really are just coming to see how you're doing. What can we do to help you? Would you not love us or what? You know, I mean, and I know I say that because it really does floor me in my 30 years of expertise that this is an untapped market with most funeral homes. If you go to funeral homes and you say to them, what's your biggest lead source? What are we going to tell you? They're going to say, oh, we do mail drops and blah, blah, blah. I almost laugh because it's such an easy solution to a problem that they would have. It is. Exactly. And again, getting back to the at-need staff, I can't say enough about them because, face it, if they're not doing a good job, there's no way. I mean, if anything, my conversation is going to go, hello, Mrs. Jones, this is Peggy from the Smith Funeral Home. I just wanted to call to see how you were and I also wanted to make sure everything was okay with services. Well, you know I'm not going to get the same answer if they're not happy with the services. So it has to start with at-need. This is nothing that a funeral home industry can just say, yeah, we're going to start working pre-need now. It has to come from the beginning, from that first call, from that first visit with the family. It's really a culture change, not so much just, hey, let's get a different lead source. Let's start working pre-need. It's not going to happen like that. I personally, which, sorry to say, I mean, it's kind of sad, but it's helped me in my business is I lost my father when he was only 33, tragically, to suicide. I lost my mom when she was only 57 to a heart attack. And obviously that was some of the darkest days of my life. I use it as a reference because when families say to me, as they do sometimes, oh, let my kids worry about it. You know, I've been good to them and I've said, you know, to be honest with you, I was that kid. And I can tell you, it's not a nice thing to leave on your family to have to do. Number one, they're going to second guess themselves as to what do you want? They love you so much and they want to give you the sendoff you deserve. And why make them guess? The funny thing that I tell people is we all buy life insurance. What do you think you buy life insurance for? And nobody hesitates to buy life insurance, by the way. Sit down and really think about what are you buying life insurance for? So that when you die, your family can be okay financially. Well, I don't know about you, but if I had to choose between emotionally okay and financially okay, I think I would pick emotionally. And I say that because if you're not emotionally okay, what good is all that money really? It's just to me, it's just, I struggle with this because when I talk with my family and friends who know what I do for a living, you can believe I have them all on board because I say to them, look, I'm not telling you what to do. I'm just going to ask you a question. And it's one that I referenced to earlier. If something happened to me today and I got hit by a car and died, I can honestly say my kids know exactly where my paperwork is and who to call. Sounds like Ghostbusters, who are you going to call? But it's the truth. They will make one phone call. And then what I want is for my loved ones to gather, have all the food and talk and laugh, look through pictures of me, whatever. I don't want them, I don't want them to have the same problem that I'd had, which is when my mom passed, I'm one of five, the middle child, although they all came and gathered at my house. I didn't know the Gibnish family. Funeral director came up in the black car, which they don't do now, at least ours don't. And at that point, we discussed arrangements. And of course, when you have five siblings, you have five different ideals of what mom wanted. And we just really had a clue. But we went from the brothers who wanted this elaborate celebration to the sisters who said, you know, I don't know that mom would want all that hoopla. Then it came to the final piece. Well, how are we going to pay for this, says the funeral director. And we said, oh, you know, just take it out of her life insurance. Well, what a time to find out she had no life insurance. So again, I use that story over and over to tell people, you know what you just went through with your loved one. Unless you can answer that question to me that your family is 100% confident to know what you want, you're doing them a disservice. And I know how much you love your family. So why would you want to do that to them? Pretty good, right? You can't fake it. You just can't. I hope that comes through in my sincerity to say, I really am a person who just really wants to help others. I've been down that road, and I want to help everyone else not go down it. Again, I can't make other people have that life experience. I can only speak for myself. I just believe in it so much, and I love the opportunity to help other people help other people, which is what I'm trying to do. I mean, first of all, I couldn't imagine anybody saying that they really don't need or want any more business unless they are a mom-pop business who just are comfortable doing so many calls a year. But you're actually doing a disservice to the community by not offering the things that I'm trying to explain to you. And more importantly, rather than spend your marketing dollars on nail drops and talks and seminars and things like radio clips and stuff, why not surround yourself with some great people such as myself that truly can help nurture the business that you've already spent years building? Doesn't that make sense? Really, that's what I would say to any funeral director who thought that they don't need to do this. They should want to do it because if they really believe in the staff that they have, it's a no-brainer. It's a great way to get a terrific lead source and not cost anything more than what you're already doing in running the business. Help the staff that you work with and for to start the conversation early so that if you do call from the Smith Funeral Home, face it, after somebody dies, they're getting a million calls from a million different companies. So the first thing that they could do is get the staff that meets with the family first on board with the fact that you're going to be following up. And number two, get yourself a product that is something that folks will welcome you to bring out to them. They're not going to let you just come out to say, hey, how are you doing? The whole reason people agree to a visit from our guys and gals is because we're bringing them something of value that we've spent years tweaking so that it is something of value. And number three is get yourself as much life experience as you can. I mean, hopefully they wouldn't be in the business if they're not, but I do know a lot of salespeople that are on forces, not with our company, but that are coming from other sales experience and you're going to need to really get a good fit. So if you're somebody that's in charge of hiring them, take the time to hire the right people. Okay. My name is Peggy Janssen and I work with Life Celebration by Gibnish Homes and I help to run the pre-need department for all of our homes. And I've been doing this for over 30 years because I love to help people. I've had my own life experience in losing loved ones that had nothing in order. So to me, it makes such sense and if I can save someone from some of the heartache I went through, I'm all for it by helping build the business of the company I work for. I think we could have talked for another couple of hours and just, you know, because that's only one lead source, mind you.