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What are some things on the To-Do list before getting in a serious relationship?
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What are some things on the To-Do list before getting in a serious relationship?
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What are some things on the To-Do list before getting in a serious relationship?
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The hosts of the Full Circle Podcast discuss the importance of communication and consistency in relationships. They emphasize the need to be transparent about intentions, deal breakers, and love languages. They also highlight the value of building a friendship before entering into a relationship. All right, welcome to another episode of Full Circle Podcast. I'm your host, JP, and I have a special guest with me, my lovely lady, Kaitlyn. Good night. Hi, everyone. All right. So how are you feeling tonight? Feeling good. How so? Because I'm with you. Okay, here we go with the lyrics. No, but I definitely feel the same. I'm happy that we're here, you know, doing an episode for the show. Now it's on different platforms. Now we're on Apple Podcasts, we're on Instagram, trying to get on YouTube. Moving on up, everybody. You know, trying to level up. And speaking of leveling up, I think today's topic is going to be fun. We're going to be talking about, like, you know, relationships in a nutshell, right? Like getting into it, preparing, you know, because I personally think that you always have to prepare before getting into any relationship. That's the whole talking stage, like preparation and things like that and necessities. Well, what are some of your ideas when it comes to, like, the talking stage? How do you feel about the talking stage, how it's handled and, like, the whole process? I feel like different people have different outlooks when it comes to the talking stage because some people look at the talking stage as, oh, it's not that serious because we're not in a real relationship yet. But it's just like, how can you expect that person to take you seriously if you're not taking the talking stage serious? All right. Yeah. So, but this is where, all right, so we're going to start now, huh? I guess so, we can dive into it. So, this is why, personally, I feel like the talking stage, I guess, right before you get into a relationship, you should look for consistency. Because ain't nobody want to be with someone that can't keep their words, somebody that can't show, like, repetition and, like, a good pattern of, like, ways of, like, just like the way that they move. And I also feel like companionship is another one because you can try to talk to somebody and then when you get to know them, you're talking to them, you're like, oh, no. Like, I could see where we're going to clash here. And more morally, you're just like your ideas and your outlooks on different things just don't add up. Right. And that's when I feel like also communication comes into play because if you don't communicate effectively with people, like, I feel like you're going to either be stuck or you're going to be in a revolving door of the unknown. What is the unknown? As in, if you're not asking people the right questions, you would never know, like, what they got going on, right? For instance, some people end up in situationships and end up in these messed up situations because they never communicated as to what type of relationship this is. Whether it be somebody end up liking somebody more than the other person or the other person end up doing or liking the other person less or one person is doing more and then they're expecting the other person to do it, but the other person don't like them like that. So it's always like a, I always feel like it's a communication barrier of, like, intentions as well because that's where people get things misconstrued when, and it's like also mainly for women, I can say, are the ones that mainly ask, what are we? When they feel like they're giving too much and they feel like they don't have a title, like the person doesn't deserve it because it's more of like a, I'm giving you myself, or I'm doing these things to you, but I'm not your girlfriend. Again, I'm saying, so it's just like, I feel like it's more of like a... You can justify why you're doing these things to this person because of the title? No, they don't want to waste their time for somebody that's, again, not consistent. You get what I'm saying? Like some people are waiting for people to continuously doing things for them or like continuously showing up for them. And if that was not communicated, you get what I'm saying? So what type of relationship that it was, you can't expect or have expectations for people. Right. I mean, as a man, when I was single, I think we did, I did look for consistency, but consistency looks different in different phases of your life. And different, depending on where you are trying to go in life when it comes to your love life, because think about it, sugar daddies or sugar mommas or whatever the case may be, they're consistently dishing out bread for the attention. Right? Yeah, it's a transaction. It's an exchange, but they're being consistent, but that's because you're not looking for a relationship. So they're being consistent in the thing that you want at the moment. But like when you're in the talking stage with somebody that you kind of see potential in, I guess like what you're saying is that they have, that person should be consistent in doing the things that person A is looking for out of person B. So I agree with that. Just to add on to it, I think that being transparent and honest about, you know, what you're about, what you're, you know, able to, you know, provide in a relationship, whether it be a man or a woman, what you will and won't stand for, this way that there's no miscommunication. Like you've got to, what's the, a deal breaker. You've got to announce your deal breakers. Absolutely. Like announcing your deal breakers after the fact kind of makes it null and void because it already happened. Right? Like you can't. And that person didn't know that that was a deal breaker. Yeah. You can't even hold it against them. You can't hold it against them. I mean, you kind of like subjected between staying with them off of technicality, why you're still upset with them because they did X, Y, and Z. But because you didn't tell them ahead of time, it's like you would be looked up as a fuck that person if you didn't really say nothing. But now it's like, you know, had you said something to begin with? And people always want to say, oh, communication is not always the case of comprehension, which I definitely understand. But sometimes it really is communication because you cannot expect somebody to know how you're feeling and what you're feeling and what you want if you do not open up your mouth and say it. Like these people are not mind reading. And that's for both sides. Like I can't read your mind. That's what you want. And you can't read my mind. That's what I want. Yeah, there's like inevitable things that like I'm pretty sure like I'm thinking like I'm not thinking that we're going to get into a relationship and you're going to cheat on me. You get what I'm saying? Right. Everybody goes into a relationship thinking they're going to get cheated on. Right. Like I'm saying, like those are like inevitable things. I'm talking about like people have different love languages. If you like words of affirmation, you like reassurance, you have to tell me that so that I can be able to provide that for you, which people be like, oh, that love language is like, no, everyone is different. I feel like everyone likes a little bit of everything, but it's just there's probably one or two that are like, yeah. More appreciative. Yes. Yes. Because I'm not going to sit here and say that, oh, like my love language is receiving gifts, but I don't like physical touch. You get what I'm saying? Like I feel like everybody likes a little bit of everything. Like, yes, I do like getting gifts. Yes, I do like physical touch. You get what I'm saying? Yes, I do like words of affirmation. You get what I'm saying? I feel like it's a little bit of everything. But like I said, some people just have one that stands out. Are you okay? Yeah, I'm fine. One that stands out more than the other. Right. So that right there is what you have to communicate. Yeah. It's something that me and you talked about like in the beginning of our relationship intentions. Definitely. Like you have to voice your intentions and be honest. Like even if you might think that the person is like, they might get or they might not agree with your intentions or they might not be like, you know, we don't, I'm not really rocking with that. You got to be okay with that. Like you got to be okay with like possibly losing the person at that point in time. I understand and know how you feel. Yeah, because once you start to fold just to appease them, like it's going to always happen. Resentment. But I think it's going to create a cycle as to where like either the person is going to pick up the fact that you're folding for them and folding for their likes and wants, not even their desires, but their likes and wants. Some people may abuse that. Some people may not even respect you at that because, you know, they will want to deal with somebody or be in a situation with somebody who's able to stand their toes down on their beliefs and their morals, even when it comes to relationships. Like, you know, despite how attracted I am to you, if me and you, you know, if you don't believe in God and I'm, you know, I'm a churchgoer, then yeah, like it's not, it's not going to work no matter how much I'm feeling, you know. So, you know, just being transparent and like even more so like into my like my last point, I think friendship. You got to be friends with this person. Absolutely. That's the whole point of the talking stage, like to build that friendship, even if, you know, because our situation is a little different. Yeah. Like, you know, for those who do know the story, you know, you guys know like this is like years in the making without really it being in the making. Yeah. I mean. Like we knew each other. Yeah. We were friends and, you know, life happens where you don't really talk to the person like that. We just go back to social media. Yeah. Basically, our relationship started as a swipe up conversation and it was friendly. It wasn't sliding in nobody's DMs. It was literally like, yo, like, what's up? How you been? Like it was started off like that. For those who don't know. Oh, my God. You brought it up. Okay. I swiped up on Snapchat. But you said it was something, you said it was simple. Yes. Okay. Yes. I swiped up on Snapchat and I was just like, oh, shoot. How you doing? Whatever, whatever. And then you was like, yo. You don't got to hide the fact that I swiped up. It wasn't no provocative. It wasn't. I was really just smoking and putting it on Snapchat. You know, she's seeing me smoking and it was something new. Yeah. And she had never seen me do it before. So it was a conversation to be had. I'm like, it was so cute. Like, yeah. You know, it was like, swipe, swipe. Yeah. It was like, yeah, pull up. Whenever you're free, pull up. It was one of those situations. It was like, I like that. And that invitation on mine was literally as a friend. Yeah. And that's why I say like a friendship is important. Because it wasn't like. There was no like. Sexual tension. There was no. There wasn't like no underlying. Yeah. Like. Motive. Yeah. Ulterior motive. There was no ulterior motive to it. No. It was just regular. Just friends. So, yeah. Like, being friends is definitely important on top of. Like, because it definitely, in my eyes, is a foundation of everything else that we said in addition to tonight's topic. Right. You can't communicate or be transparent with a stranger or somebody that you're at odds with. It makes things like a thousand times harder, which then results in the relationship becoming its own obstacle. And I also feel like you have to like be compatible. Like, you guys have to share some type of interest. Yeah. Like. Yeah. Because, yeah, probably one thing brought you guys together, but what else? You get what I'm saying? Like, you have to keep it interesting. You know what I'm saying? Like, because, you know, sometimes feelings fade and with certain things with like certain relationships, you know, you always try to keep a spark. But if that was always your friend, you get what I'm saying? You can always revert back to that friendship. Right. And then work your way back to. Yeah. But it has to be wanted on both ends. Sometimes like things die out because one person gave up and it's just like that becomes either damning to the other person, like disheartening to the other person, or it becomes like encouraging to the other person. Like, you know what? I'm not going to let you give up. Like, I'm going to work twice as hard just to keep this afloat for the time being or even, you know, for however long. Like, there are some people that are really out there that like, like me personally, I don't believe in divorce. Like, once I put a ring on your finger, like, I think that's going to be my mindset. That's it. That's it. Like, we can be mad at each other. And it's not even like a that's it. Like, oh, shit, I'm settling. No, this is where I'm at. Yeah. This is me putting my stamp on it. And this is me building on top of it. Like, it's not nothing negative. Hmm. Let me ask you a question. Have you ever seen, like, a couple go from, like, lovey-dovey, and then you just see one person just start to just dislike? Dislike or check out? Dislike the other person. Like, dislike. Yeah. Yeah, I've seen it. That is crazy. Like, how relationships really can turn sour. Right. And I feel like a lot of relationships like that, I don't want to say that there's not a foundation, but there's definitely – sometimes I feel like it goes one-sided. It has to go one-sided where there's one person trying and one person not trying. And then it's probably the other one person that just give up, and then they both just give up. What if it's a situation where both parties are trying, but they just can't get it right? Like, they both are really trying to, like, take the other person out, but it just is bad turn after bad turn. Like, they try to take them out on a date every week. Like, they've been trying to bring them flowers, and the other person is just like, no, I don't really like these flowers. Like, it's always a negative. On both ends. It went bad somewhere. Like, the communication clearly somewhere is not – because I understand, like, for instance, yeah, somebody could be like, oh, yes, I did this for this girl, but she didn't like it. But the thing is, what if that's not something that she's interested in, and you took it upon yourself, and because you feel like it's nice, you're expecting her to just be receptive to it. So, that's why I'm saying it's a communication thing, because if you really knew what the person liked, you would have never did what you thought that they would have liked. That's true. Like you said, though, they have to start communicating. Sometimes things change, right? Things change. People change. Ones change. So, like, you know, what you told me that you liked three years ago may not be something that you like now. And let's say I try to bring it back up, and you're not really feeling it, how would I know that until you tell me that? So, it's just like you said in the beginning, it's all about the communication and being able to express, like, hey, this is where I'm at in my life right now. This is what I'm into, what I'm not into, you know, and all types of things. But being that you started off with a question, I do have a question for you. All right? So, my question for you is, what's the longest you've been single? Oh, damn, I never thought about that. The longest I've been single. Um, I think about, I haven't been in a lot of relationships, but I'm trying to think about the time before. Well, before I came into this relationship, I was single for, I think, like, four years. Four years? Mm-hmm. Was that by choice or solely by choice? Mm-hmm. Mainly because I feel like when I was in my last relationship, I went from, like, transitioning, like, teenager to, like, 20s. So, I feel like I was, like, in, I don't want to say enjoying my 20s, like, not to say, like, I'm old and shit like that, but I just feel like I'm 20, I'm an adult. I'm trying to learn myself, see what I like from what I don't like, not saying that I didn't talk to nobody, because, you know, you can talk to people here and there. But, you know what I'm saying? Like, I just never saw myself being in a relationship so fast after, like, that breakup. I just felt like I had to get back to me, learn myself again, know what I like, you know what I'm saying? And also heal from that as well and preparing myself for a new relationship. So, yeah, it was about four years, and I don't regret that. Okay. I would say for me, I think for me it's been about maybe two and a half, going on three years I was single. You know, in times like that, I just felt like, you know, me being single was more so of a choice rather than, you know, women not choosing me. Like, I didn't really put myself out there to be, you know, in a dating scene. But going into my next question, right, what encouraged you to start dating again? Like I said before, like, I was more focused on myself. I feel like I was a little selfish because I wanted to, you know, get back to doing. Not to say that my previous relationship stopped me from doing things that I wanted to do. But, you know, when you are in a relationship, you have to be mindful of the things that you're doing. And, you know, saying things like that in terms of, like, you've got to be aware and alert for the other person's feelings. I feel like when I became single, I just, you know what I'm saying, it's more like I don't got to worry about it. You didn't have to account for it. Yeah, I didn't have to give a damn. So, I'm not even saying that in a negative way. It's just more like I was doing what I wanted to do. That's the truth. That's really the truth to the matter. No, it is. I was doing what I wanted to do when I wanted to do it. I wanted to do it wherever I wanted to do it, with whoever. You get what I'm saying? Like, it did not matter, you know? So, that's the type of vibe that I was on. I was more looking at it as, you know, like, I know, I feel like every little girl has, like, for me, I'm speaking for myself, but I'm pretty sure a majority of women had this idea, like, yes, I'm going to finish school. I'm going to get married by the time I'm 24 and have kids at 25. You get what I'm saying? Stuff like that. And it's just like when you reach that age, not to say that's impossible, but it's more like you're so young in your 20s that people keep thinking that when they get to their 30s, they're old. Me, personally, what encouraged me to start dating again, because I felt like I worked on me, and I felt like I was emotionally and mentally available to take on someone else's emotions, because I wouldn't call somebody a burden. It's just more like to take on that and also to be mindful of that. Like, I feel like anybody that goes into something that emotionally available or mentally available, a lot of people want to also stay financially, like, available, but the thing about money is that it comes and goes. I personally don't think finances should really be a pillar for a relationship until you're talking engagement or marriage. While we're dating, my money is not your money unless I deem it to be so, and vice versa. Yeah, like that's your choice. That's something if I choose to do. I'm not really obligated to do it. Well, I shouldn't be. Let me say that. I shouldn't be obligated to do it, but, you know, every relationship is a little different. You know, terms like that. And that's something that can be inclusive. What works for y'all works for y'all. It may not work for other people. That's why a lot of people be like, oh, like, I don't understand how y'all could do this or why they doing this. If it doesn't work for you, it doesn't work for you. And this is why we say, this is why I said companionship, because y'all got to share the same interests, same views, and things like that. But, yeah, I feel like I was more, like, emotionally and mentally and spiritually, like, available. Like, I feel like I worked on myself. So, it's crazy how we even started dating because it didn't even start like that. I feel like it was just genuine. Like, it was just seamless as to how we ended up being together. I don't feel like it was, like, I don't even want to say hard, but I don't feel like I was pressured to get into this relationship. Right. Yeah, no, same here. Like, I, you know, pride myself on just, like, always giving somebody options, even when we're just talking. And, I mean, in terms of options, it's like, I don't ever want somebody to feel like they got to do something for me because I might get mad if they don't. Like, no, like, I'm always be Gucci. Like, yeah, I might be, you know, be a little disappointed or something like that. But it's never going to be to the point where, like, I'm upset and can't, you know, don't want to deal with you because you can't do something for me. Like, you know, so as far as that is concerned, like, once I'm available for somebody in a relationship, I'm fully available. You know, I just think that we made it easy for each other because the things that we made as standards or expectations of the other person, it wasn't impossible to obtain. And if you didn't do it, it's because you chose not to, not because you couldn't. And I think that's a big thing for a lot of relationships nowadays. Like, I feel like from what I'm seeing, going back to your question, where have I ever seen a relationship where one person just doesn't like the other person? It's because there's so much built-up resentment from having expectations of somebody that you knew that they wasn't going to get there. And also I feel like sometimes it's just a build-up of a whole bunch of small things. Right. That just, I feel like people try to sweep certain things under the rug and don't want to talk about certain things, but that's when shit starts snowballing. Because it may seem like a small incident and the person may be looking at you like, oh, you're still holding on to that, but we spoke about it. Because you didn't really voice your opinion and really be honest. And sometimes, I don't want to say that you didn't voice it because there are some people who cannot take constructive criticism. Or accountability. Yeah, accountability is a big one where they don't want to seem wrong. And that's where I feel like narcissistic behavior comes into play. If your partner can't tell you, yo, you're bugging. Or I don't like that. Or this is not what I'd like. Why are you getting riled up that your partner, the one that you are instilling your trust, love, and everything in, why are you getting upset that they're telling you that? Clearly they're telling you that because they care for you and they love you and they want you to change and they want it. And I don't think that they want you to change, but they want you to be aware. Of what they're doing, what their behavior or lack of behavior is doing to the person. And a lot of people feel like when their partner is telling them things, they feel like the partner is attacking them. But it's like, I'm not attacking you. I'm just putting you on to what I'm feeling. And that's the thing. Some people, they listen to respond. They don't listen to understand and to hear clearly what the other person is saying. I feel like people struggle with saying I'm sorry. I agree. And so that goes into my next question. This, you can either answer it personally or answer it like generally. Is it harder to apologize to your significant other or your friends? Harder? Which one is harder to do? To apologize to your significant other or your friends? I don't feel like it's hard to apologize. No, I never said it. Well, you and yourself are an anomaly. Okay, maybe. Take yourself on that. Okay, generally, I feel like people are harder to apologize to their significant other. I mean, because that's what it is like in America. What do you mean? Elaborate on that. Whereas, like, they don't want to be put in a certain light and be viewed in a certain light by their partner. Because not for nothing, I feel like your partner is the person that knows you the most. Not your mother, not your father, not your sister. Especially if you're living with that person, I feel like that person knows you, like, how you are, when you're happy, when you're not on your phone, when you're not posting on social media. They see all of you. So I feel like for them to see you like that all the time and for them to do something to you, I feel like it's more like shame, embarrassment, and more like uncomfortability because it's like, I really messed up. And you know that, and I know that. But like I said, I just feel like it's just embarrassment and shame. I think who you're apologizing to plays a big factor into how people take accountability, right? And when I say who, I mean, like, the personality, not the title. So if you're apologizing to a person who don't know how to let shit go, you're going to be apologizing forever. Because they might say, oh, they're going to keep talking about it over and over again. And it's just like, I'm pretty sure that same person that's going on and on about it, they are the ones who are the most shamed and the most embarrassed that somebody tried to hurt themselves. Yeah, yeah. Like, they victimized themselves. Yeah. And I sometimes don't want to take accountability to it because they, again, they might feel like they know everything or they might feel like everything that they do is correct. But this, I'm glad we're going famous because this is where people also begin being misconstrued. In a relationship, you guys are two completely different people. You guys have to learn how to coexist and how to compromise and how to, like, literally have a balance between the two. Some people bend to a relationship and they still want to do the same things that they were doing. And they don't want to change because they feel like, and when I say change, it's more of like tweaking. Tweaking certain stuff about yourself that your partner may not like or something that they may not agree with. Right. And I don't feel like if your partner is telling you something, it's something to harm you. It's not something to make you feel insecure about yourself. It's more of like a, again, I'm putting you on. Yeah. And you get what I'm saying? Like, people be forgetting that you have to compromise. Like, that's something that I might think is okay might be okay to you and vice versa. You just have to learn each other and see what each other. Yeah. I feel like people should be, you know, considering how other people feel. And respectful. So I've got two last questions before you wrap this up. Two more? Two more. We're almost done. We're almost finished with this. You're not done yet? Yeah, I'm trying to get all in because we've been trying to, you know, make some great content. I think we're doing so good so far. So I know a lot of relationships are never just the two people involved. They never are just the two people involved. What I mean by that is your friends are involved in the selection process. Family is involved in the selection process, whether it be like direct or indirect, right? But my question is how influential should your circle of friends be when it comes to your love life? How influential? Mm-hmm. I mean... Because let's be real. Like we've all gone to our friend and, like, somebody that we trust, right, even at the time is just, like, not really taking their advice like, oh, shit, it's a yay or nay on them alone, but, like, maybe they might see something that you missed. You get what I'm saying? Like a second pair of eyes on this person or a second opinion on that person. Like how influential would, like, your most trusted friend be in your love life? I don't think any of my friends are going to influence on my love life. Like I feel like I can express myself to them and I can listen to their opinion and respect it and take it into account, but that doesn't mean that I'm generally taking their advice as to what I'm doing in the relationship. Right. I'm just trying to get a different outlook, different understanding. That doesn't mean that they influence me. Right. You get what I'm saying? Like, yeah, yeah, you could probably, you get what I'm saying, like, take into account what they're saying, but that doesn't mean that what they're saying means that I'm going to do what they say. Of course, right. You get what I'm saying? So I feel like that's, again, up to you and your partner. So, like, out of the 10%, like, out of 100%, out of 100%, how much do they, like, if some, like, if most of your friends say, like, they don't like somebody you were dating, does that deter you in any way, shape, or form, or does that make you kind of, like, take a second look at them, or are you just going to continue doing it? I mean, I would take into account if it's more than one. If it's three people. If it's three different people. Then I'll probably be like, hold on. Let me see if I can look at it from a different perspective. You get what I'm saying? Probably take into account what they're saying because people be saying love is blind. Sure. No pun intended. But you get what I'm saying? So I feel like I would more, like I said, I would take it into consideration and see where they're coming from. Right. Not for nothing, I feel like sometimes when it comes to certain situations, people have to go through the situation themselves and go through and have their own experiences. There's not much that you can do. You can see a situation going some way that you once went down a path, and you can be like, oh, yeah, I know where this is going. Girl, don't do this. Girl, don't do that. You could advise them not to do something, but they're going to do whatever, regardless of whatever you say. People are grown. People are adults. That's what I'm saying. People are going to do what they want to do at the end of the day. For me, I feel like friends and family can have an influence, especially depending on how you were raised and things like that, because a lot of people be taking their parents' advice to the T, to 100, and that's also an issue because your parents should not be that influential on your relationship as a grown adult. You have your own mind. No funny shit. Like, I remember telling my friends, like, if we knew 10% of the things that our parents did when they were our age. Yo. We would. Not give a damn about what they're saying. Yo. You know what I'm saying? Like, not to say all respect goes out the window. Yeah. We might even gain some more respect for you, but it would be a little harder for you to tell me not to go do something. Bro, my mother and my father were dating when they were 17 and 19. They married and they're still together. But my mom had me at 22. Do the math. You think five years they wasn't doing stuff? Come on. We're not going to do that. No, no. I'm just saying. You get what I'm saying. Yeah. Especially at that age. Like, come on. I feel like I passed the mark. I passed my mom. I'm 27 now. If I decide to have a child, that's on me. And the person you have a child with. Absolutely. Whoever that may be. You know who it is? The lucky contestant. TBD. To be determined. I heard it from her first, right? To be determined. But, yes. Last question before we wrap this beautiful conversation up. Should someone's standards shift after a failed relationship or situation? No. Well. Think about it. It's a pen. It's a pen. Some people be really on a high horse. And their expectations are so out of this world. And it's just like, who do you think you are to be expected all of this? Like, people are human. Which I'm not saying that your expectations are impossible. But everybody can't have it all. Right. And, like, everyone has their flaws. I feel like that. Like, every human being has their flaws. Everyone has their strength and their weakness. It's up to you to determine which strength and which weakness you are willing. To pick your poison. Yeah. Like, which one are you willing to stick it out with? So, I think, yeah. I think you should change it. After having failed a relationship or a situation. Mainly because. Excuse me. Mainly because you went in there with the notion that, like, you wanted a certain type of thing. And if you got that, that thing, and it didn't work out for you, for you to retry that again just with a different person, it kind of breeds insanity. Right. In accordance to Albert Einstein. Like, you do something over and over again with the same way and expect a different outcome, you're insane. So, just because you may switch up the person, the expectations, whether it be finances, mindsets, behavior. Let's just say, for instance, a guy wants a female who's only been in Brownsville. I'm not saying only women from Brownsville are only good for one or two things. But when you run into a woman from Brownsville and she starts to portray those things that you've heard so much about, you get what I'm saying? Like, you kind of got to change your standards. You have to because now the things that you're looking for are not up to par to be in your life. Your standards need to equate to what you're able to provide and what you're able to handle at that moment. They got to, like, be linear. You hear what I'm saying? So, you may want a six-figure person, but can you handle a six-figure person? Like, think about what it took for them to get six figures. Are you making six figures? You get what I'm saying? And then it's, like, on top of that, what if a six-figure person requires a person who makes three square meals a day, down to the T, on a schedule, and is on, like, a tight-knit, tough-type situation? You do what I say when I say it, so on and so forth. If you want me to have six figures to take care of you, you got to do whatever I say in this relationship. Some people are not going to look at that as an even trade. So, it's just like, no, bring down your standards a little bit, and same thing with you, the person with the six figures. You got to bring it down sometimes, because a person's not going to want to always cook for you three times a day, every day. Sometimes not standing on your standards can sometimes, like, bring you into the guy as well. Granted. But it's also when you're being greedy with your standards. Which I understand, but I don't feel like they, like, so much standards and they want a guy with a good job, no kids, family-oriented, believe in God, you know what I'm saying, honest stuff like that. I don't feel like it's impossible to have. You get what I'm saying? But I don't feel like it's impossible to meet a standard that you want. No, yeah, and those things are right. But you have, like I said, you have to be able to output those things that you're requesting in those standards, right? Absolutely. So, like you said, are you making six figures? If you're not even making five figures, what are you doing? You know what I'm saying? You can't even really rub elbows with this person, not for nothing. Financially, let's just say it like that. They could be having a good heart and all of that, but the chances of you meeting this person and having to live up there to their lifestyle, right? Because not for nothing, like I said before in an episode before, a lot of people want to become, a lot of women want to be independent, so on and so forth. So, in my eyes, it shouldn't really matter if a man makes five figures or six figures, right? If you want to make money to protect yourself and do for yourself and take care of yourself, then do that. But a man's worth should not come based off of how much he can take care of himself and you and someone else. If you're not married and there's not a child involved, none of that should matter. But with that being said, I think we're going to close this episode out with that. Yeah, I want to say thank you for tuning in, everybody. If you got to this part of the episode, we definitely want to say thank you. We appreciate you. Thank you for joining the Full Circle community. Shout out to Ms. Kate's Plates, you know, CEO of Kate's Plates. You know, if you want a catering business, like a catering event, anything going on with some delicious food, you need that. Kate's Plates is the place to be. I'm going to tag her into the comments, her business in the comments. And, yeah, if you guys have any tips or comments based on the conversation tonight, please feel free to leave it in the comments section, or even DM me on Instagram, which will also be in the comments. So with that being said, later. Good night.
