Moth Story

The speaker reflects on a cross-country race during their freshman year that they now find funny. They describe the challenging conditions of running in a thunderstorm, slipping on tree branches and rocks, and even injuring their knee. Despite the unpleasant experience, they pushed through and finished the race. They also mention the uphill finish and their motivation to not disappoint their dad, who couldn't attend the race. So I look back on this and laugh, by me. Now, there were definitely a few things in my life that I thought were the absolute worst thing to happen to me, but now looking back, I can't help but laugh. And definitely the one that would take the cake would be one of my freshman year cross-country races. And, as I say this, yes, I know that I have quite a few seasons left, I have three seasons left, but even as I say this now, though it was only a couple months ago, I definitely do look back and laugh. And even though I felt like I was being tortured in this scenario, yes, I still do look back and laugh. But, anyway, as I'm sure most of you guys listening to this know, cross-country is a very, let's just say pure sport. I mean, you are running for three miles without stopping, without a break, without anything. You run for three miles continuously. And I mean, the possibility of practice getting canceled, or much less a race getting canceled, the events would have to be catastrophic for that to occur. I mean, I don't think we ever had a practice canceled once, and there was even a scenario where the entirety of the fall activities that were taking place this one afternoon were canceled. I mean, football was canceled, tennis was canceled, the off-season things were canceled, it was just canceled. I mean, it was a thunderstorm. But no, the cross-country kids still had to get in their shorts and their tank tops, or like shirtless and sports bras, or whatever, and we had to go outside in the backfield and run for three miles. And it was definitely an experience. I mean, we were running and slipping on tree branches, and we were slipping on tree roots, we were slipping on rocks, I fell and busted my knee open. But I mean, it was just quite an experience. And honestly, we were even told by our coach, D, that we're tough, we're tough and we can handle it, and that we're just tougher than the other ones, we don't need to have practice canceled, we can go out there in the rain and it'll be fine, but it was most certainly not fun. It was absolutely not fun. We were drenched, we were cold, we were annoyed, and I busted my knee open, I had blood dripping down my leg as we came back, and our coach was like, oh, how'd it go? How'd you guys do? We were wet, dripping, sopping wet. I think even one of the kids went back to their dorm. And it was not ideal, it was not an ideal situation. And we were just about done. We were done. We did not want to do glutes, we did not want to do core, we did not want to do anything after this, but we went back inside, somewhat dried off, and went and did our conditioning. And we had a race the next day. We had a three miles long race at Palm Thrift, and it did not go much better. I mean, the race, we get there, hoping, praying that the race would get canceled, it did not get canceled. I mean, we got out of the bus, perfectly warm and dry, and by the time we went into the facility where we had our spot and all our stuff, we were dripping wet. Never mind a warm up, we didn't get there in time for a warm up. We did not make it in time to do a little jog, get some stretches, no, no, no, no, no, we had to put our stuff down and head immediately to the starting line. And as I'm sure most of you that play sports know that doing anything cold turkey, whether it is a cross country race, or a baseball game, or a softball game, or any sport, doing a cold turkey is not fun. Especially, again, when you have to run for continuous miles, it is most certainly not fun. And not only that, we were not only just doing a cold turkey, we were doing it in a thunderstorm, thunder, downpour, there was leaves falling everywhere, it was a very woodsy course, a lot of tree branches, a lot of roots, a lot of rocks, and it was just not, we just wanted to go home. We literally begged, because there were schools that had backed out of this race. And no, no, we were big and strong and we did not back out. And we got to the starting line, we all looked at each other and were like, well, there goes nothing. So, the gun goes off, and immediately we all splash in puddles, and we are already wet. My socks, like not even a minute into the race, my socks were dripping, sopping, soaking wet, including my shoes, and we took the first turn, and it was just, the conditions were treacherous. I mean, we ran down this slight, slight downhill, and by the end of it, there were a pile of girls dripping in mud, and we were all, we were all, like, annoyed. We were just all, like, so done, we were so done. And like I said, it wasn't even five minutes into the race. And anyway, we just, we get up, brush it off, and as I looked ahead, I saw some of my teammates even dripping, falling, and just not having a good time. No one was having a good time in this race. And usually, you can always tell, there's always, like, the people that are like, oh, I want to go home, I don't want to be here, and then, like, you know, like, the person in the front that's like, yeah, yeah, let's just, no. Not even the girl in the lead looked like she was having fun. But regardless, we took the second bend, and you hear our coach cheering for us, and I love Ms. D, love Coach D, but she was all bundled up in her raincoat, had an umbrella, and I was very jealous. But, like I said, we took the second bend, and we eventually finished the first mile. And that is the moment where I slipped on a tree root and scratched my entire knee. And I was dripping blood, not even halfway into the race, but it's okay, it's okay. We were, as I looked around, there were things like falling leaves, and they were sticking onto my skin, and my shoes, my laces were completely knotted, like, I still can't get them out to this day. I use those shoes for a lot of athletic stuff, and I still can't get those knots out from that specific race. And I just, there was, like, every time I'd wipe my forehead, or I'd wipe my hair out of my face, it would immediately come back, because it was raining, and it was awful, it was wet, it was disgusting. And as we came around to the one and a half mile mark, so, like, halfway of the race, there was about probably some of the leaders of the race coming around as well, and you could just see their knees, and you could see dirt and mud all over theirs too. But, as I've said many times, we just kept trekking on, kept moving on. I was just glad, honestly, that I wasn't last. I would've thought, because I came back from an ankle injury, I honestly thought I could've been last, but I was not, luckily. I had quite a few people behind me. But, as we got through that part, that was just the beginning, we went around to this big loop, and, I mean, it was big in the sense where it was long. It was not wide, it was just long. And it consisted of going through a loop in the woods, where we would pass through some in the path on the other side of those trees, and you look to your left, that was the path that you would take to go back. And so I was just in the beginning part of this loop, and, oh, did I mention at the end of each loop, there's a hill? So, I had to mentally prepare for that, because you could see it in the distance very, very slightly, but, and it was all misty out, kind of foggy, it was just so gross, that was so nasty out. But, I just, there were so many times throughout that race, where I thought to myself, like, should I just say my ankle's hurting again? Because it truthfully was. I had a brace on, but it was actually killing me. But, my dad wasn't at that race, and my dad and I have a special bond over cross country, because he did cross country, and, so, I mean, he wasn't there for that, he was very looking forward to the fact that my mom would have a video for him. I just, I didn't want to disappoint, I did not want to disappoint, so I made sure to keep pushing. What I knew was pain was temporary, and the fact that I would be relieved at the end of it, that would be permanent. And the fact that what was also temporary was this race. Like, this race was going to end. I knew that since it had been, like, what, almost two miles, in reality I had like 13 minutes left to go, because I knew my mile pace would be slower, but, I mean, what, 13 minutes left to go-ish, 14 maybe? And, you know, I, like I said, I kept going. I got to the first hill, and I made it. I thought I was going to throw up, but I did. And, like I said, I kept going, and eventually I got to that part where now I was on the opposite side of the tree. And as I climbed up that last hill, it brought me out to, like, it was a path into more woods, but it was, like, less woodsy. I could tell that the finish was in sight. Or so I thought. It was a very brief part. And as I'm looking around, there's still more tall trees, but you can see houses, you can see cars. It didn't look like I was lost in some movie. And I'm getting out, and all of a sudden, I see a big, big hill. As I'm coming out of this woods part, there's a big sidewalk, and I'm thinking to myself, okay, alright, this is going to be painful, but I knew that there was an uphill finish, so I was just telling myself, alright, you're, what, like a few minutes from the finish? You just push it. So I push it up that hill, and I came out to flat terrain. And I'm like, okay, alright, alright, I'm just going to finish this, I'm going to cross this, and then I'll be done. No. There was a giant uphill finish from the bottom of the parking lot I was in, because you had to cross through this little part of the parking lot, and it was so high, it was like a hill, like the school buildings were. And I was thinking to myself, oh my god, I just killed myself on that last hill, killed all my energy, I killed my legs, I busted my knee, I don't know what I'm going to do. So, again, as I'm coming up on this hill, mentally preparing, but I was very motivated at the same time, because I heard the girls behind me. Now I got on a fairly good lead on these girls, but all of a sudden I heard some people behind me, and I was like, no, absolutely not, I'm not going to let them pass me at the last second when I've had a lead on them for this entire race. So I start my truck up the hill, and there was a woman about halfway, and she was like, you got this, Cheshire, you got it, you're going to look back on this, in a few years you're going to laugh, and this is all going to be worth it, I promise. And literally in that moment, I wanted her to just disappear. Like, go away, go away, please, please, I couldn't even talk, I could not talk. But my legs felt like they were on fire. To be honest, I kind of didn't feel them anymore. They felt like they were burning, but at the same time they felt like they were gone. And my arms felt, they were moving on their own, like I wasn't even controlling them at this point, and they were up by my chest, and they were just moving back and forth, doing their thing, and I was huffing and puffing, and I was getting up this hill, and I could actually hear the girls behind me saying, I give up, because they had actually, some of them, not all, but a few of them had actually walked a lot of that race, so I was like, okay, I'm not coming in last, because I was terrified that I was going to come in last, like I said, because of that ankle injury. But, I get to the ending part of the hill, I felt like bawling my eyes out, to be honest, I couldn't tell if the water on my face was some tears that I couldn't control coming out, or water from the rain, but I was known on the team for always having my kick at the end, meaning, I look like I'm suffering, but then all of a sudden, I bolt for the finish, because I know, my base set, my dad told me, was the faster you go, the faster you finish, and the faster it's all over, and yes, it's going to hurt, but that's just part of it, that's just part of the sport, so I kick it, I bolt, I was honestly scared I was going to fall in front of everyone, but I didn't care, I just wanted to get across that finish line, and I'm thinking to myself, like, oh, you know, people are going to be cheering for you, you're going to be, people are going to be watching, like, come on, like, you've got to just, you have to just do it, you have to go for it, like, do not hold back, you have to use everything remaining, and like I said, I had been thinking, and this honestly felt like 15 minutes that it took me to finish, in reality, it took me less than 30 seconds, but I felt like 15 minutes, and I kept thinking back on the race, and I was thinking, alright, well, this is good, like, imagine if I had just been, imagine if I had just given up, imagine if I was just in the woods right now, like, hoping someone would just find me, but no, I got up the hill, I did what I thought was impossible, my stomach felt like, like I could feel the abs forming in my stomach, I could feel everything, I, all of a sudden, I went from feeling absolutely nothing, to feeling like I was just floating, to feeling everything, it hit me like a bus, and all of a sudden, like I said, I felt the blood drying up on my leg, I felt my, I felt my arms throbbing, I felt my ears aching, I felt my eyes tearing up, I felt my teeth chattering, I felt everything, I felt my socks, I felt my skin pruning, I felt everything, but, eventually, I crossed the finish line, and they gave me my card, for my time, and I took it, and I, and I just, I didn't pass out, but I just collapsed, I knew that I had a bit of time to get up before the girls behind me came, but, I just collapsed, I, but I was, I was proud of myself, and I did it, but that, that moment, that everything I just did, that everything I just went through, um, had been worth it, my dad was gonna get his video of me finishing, and collapsing, my team was gonna get their points, I was gonna get my satisfaction, and I, I was satisfied with the case, with the place I came in, I was satisfied with everything, and then I have very little memory of what happened after that, because I, I think, I kind of crawled off, um, I really don't remember getting up, I kind of just remember, like, sitting under the tent, in the pouring rain, with a towel over me, and my coaches telling me how well I did, but, you know, like I said, it was all, it was, I, I thought I was gonna die, but, it was a good experience, and, I say it now, oh, you know, can't wait for the next season, I'm going to be dreading the next season, I'm probably going to be throwing up more, but it's, I'm, I'm proud that I did it, I'm proud that I didn't give up, and yes, I, thank you to that lady, because I definitely look back on this, and laugh.