Cheaters

The speaker recently found out that her husband was cheating on her. She initially didn't believe it until she received texts with proof of the affair. She confronted her husband and kicked him out of the house. She discovered that he had been cheating on her with multiple people and had been on dating sites. She wonders why he did it but realizes that she did nothing wrong. Her advice is to have open communication and no secrets in a relationship to avoid cheating. She forgives her husband but is still angry and relieved to be free from the lies. She invites others to share their opinions and hopes to talk again soon. Recently, I found out that my husband was cheating on me and I thought that, you know, it was probably someone trying to stir up trouble and it wasn't true. So the first thing I asked for was proof. Boy, did I not see what was coming. I ended up with about 20 to 30 texts of screenshots that had been shared between this lady and my husband. Well, I should say then-husband. Anywho, I digress. So whenever I get home, because I was actually in the bank parking lot going through the teller, the window, in the process of doing so, I received a text saying, Hey, I'm sorry to hear what you're going through. If I can, you know, I'll keep you in my prayers, but I pray that it isn't so. And I'm like, what? What are they talking about? So I text them back and I asked the question, what are you talking about? That was the question. Very simple. And they told me that they heard that me and my husband had split up. So needless to say, I was like, well, just give me proof. They did. And whenever I got home, the first thing I did was pack up all of his clothes in trash bags, because, you know, got to throw it out with the trash, put them all in the bed of the truck. Then I changed the locks on the door. And then I went and printed off every single page. That being said, he called me on his way home from work and everything was lovey-dovey fine, just like normal. He comes in. He hugs me from behind, kisses the side of my face, and I'm thinking, you know, either I have been stupid this entire time, which I think I have, or he's just a dog, which I think he is. That being said, he goes into the bedroom to take off his shoes, and I was like, before you do all that, I said, can you explain something to me? So I took those pretty little texts and handed them to him. And he's looking over them, and his facial expressions just drop. Well, whenever they do, I was like, well, can you explain it to me? And he shook his head, and that one kind of dropped his head. I was like, okay. I said, is it true? He goes, yeah. I said, okay. I said, you need to get your stuff and get out. And I said, you have some burning choices to make, I guess is a good word for it. I said, you need to give me the keys to the cars, because they're both in my name, and then you need to go. I don't care where. I don't care how. But you need to go. He looked at me weird, and he goes, you don't want the keys to the house? No. I said, you can keep those as a memento. Really? Absolutely. I said, but don't worry. I've already changed the locks. All they'll be is for a memory for you. Oh. That was the response I got. Well, he walks out, and as he walks out, my stepson comes to collect him. He wanted to know what was going on, so I showed him the text messages, and he's like, oh, no. I was like, yeah. So, needless to say, they took Dad off. Since then, as someone says, I blew the lid off Pandora's box. Not only had he been cheating on me with an Opal Swinger, but he had also been on several dating sites, and I guess you could say was sharing it with everybody and anybody that would let him, and I've had people come to me and say, don't let him back. Just don't do it, and I'm like, you do not have that to worry about. He's gone. He's history, but the one question that I continue to ask is why? What did I do wrong? What did I not do right? Can't figure it out, and then it occurred to me. I did nothing. I can't respond for his actions. I can only respond for mine, and I've not done anything wrong, so I don't feel bad about it. I was true to him when I was being flirted with and this, that, and the other, and I never fell prey to that. He, on the other hand, went looking for it. So, my advice when it comes to cheaters is very simple. It's not, you know, once a cheater, always a cheater. I don't believe that. I believe they have the ability to stop cheating anytime they want to. My advice is know who you're with. Make sure there's no secrets shared between you. Make sure that you have access to phones, computers, laptops, whatever, that there's no secrets. As long as there's no secrets, there's no lies, and there's no bridges that are being built between. That's the only advice that I can offer anybody. And, hey, some people can forgive and forget, but I'm not one of them. I forgive him. I forgive him the moment that I found out about it. Was I angry? I'm still angry. I'm still bitter. I'm still jaded. I'm still very aggravated. But, I'm also relieved because for the first time in months, like 36 months to be more precise, I actually feel I have an honest surroundings. I don't have anybody pretending to be something that they're not. So, hey, drop a comment in my email. Give me a shout out. Let me know what you think. Hey, I'm interested in hearing your opinion. Share anything you want to. You guys have a good day, and I hope to talk to you again soon. Bye for now.