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The speaker shares a personal story about the difficulties of being a workaholic and the misconceptions around it. They discuss the pressure to maintain a workaholic lifestyle, the illusion of workaholic success, and the importance of working sustainably. The speaker also shares a personal experience of working nonstop and not having boundaries, which resulted in wasted time and the need to reshoot photos. They emphasize the need for balance and the dangers of burnout. The episode aims to provide insights and tips for those struggling with workaholism. Hey there, and welcome back. If you are listening again, one, thank you. Two, that means that you probably listened to the first episode, and so now I can actually tell you this fun fact. I recorded three episodes before actually recording the first one, because naming things and coming up with a title for this, something that would draw you in, something that would kind of explain what it is, was honestly the hardest thing for me ever. I've, you know, come up with lots of, I'm a creative person, I enjoy coming up with names for things, but for some reason, this was just such a difficult thing to come up with, and it took me actually a really long time to get this title nailed down. So if you're here, now you know that fun fact that the previous episode you listened to last week, it was recorded way later, and the podcast was nameless before then, which is, you know, kind of a metaphor for my life, so that's all right with me. Today's episode is a little bit, it's a little bit deep and it's very niche, and I think that if you relate to it, you're going to relate hard, and if you don't, you don't, and that's okay, that's exactly what this is here for, but we're going to talk about being a workaholic, but not a workaholic in the way that society sees it, a workaholic in the way that we are running on a hamster wheel, and things are just getting thrown at us, and we're, you know, just checking off the boxes, but like a half check mark. Your priorities are so skewed and not linear, you don't have funnels, you don't have a workflow, you don't have anything, you are just going all the time in hopes that something gets accomplished, and it doesn't. You're just constantly working with, you know, with no actual growth or no forward motion in your business, and yet from the outside it looks like you're successful, but you're in there, you're in this hamster wheel, you are just running yourself to death. Now, when we come to the term workaholic, and we actually listen to someone say like, oh, I'm a workaholic, in my mind when someone tells me that, that means that they just, they don't know how to shut their brain off, they really enjoy working, they work all the time, they're really successful because of it, and I actually view it as a positive thing. Sometimes people don't view it that way, but it always has some level of success with the fact that you are a workaholic. My experience with this is pretty much the opposite. I feel like I workaholic-ed myself into a hole, and it was very hard, it was very difficult to get out of it. I have a couple of stories that I want to share with you that are, they're a little personal, and I think that they're going to relate in the way that maybe you can notice these trends in your life, and if you are, in fact, in this workaholic state to where you enjoy your work, but you can't figure out these flows and this way to actually get anything accomplished or to move forward, then hopefully this episode is going to help you, and at the very end we're going to talk about a couple takeaways that you can move forward with, even just little changes in your day to where the work that you do can actually foster some success. First up, we're going to talk about three things in this workaholic state of mind that I think some of us maybe live in if you label yourself that way, and first up is there's this illusion of workaholic success, and we need to deconstruct that perception, because I just felt pressured to maintain this lifestyle, but just because you see so on social media. You see people's success, and you see all these videos of them working. You see all of these clients that they're bringing in. You see all of these paychecks that they're posting, whatever it may be. You're going to see all of this, and that's going to directly affect how you feel your work style and your workflow, and you are going to feel like, well, if I'm not working all the time like they are, then I'm not going to see success in this, and sometimes I think because the media pop culture, all of this just contributes to this misconception is that you think that being a workaholic is going to guarantee success, and that is what this entire episode is about. It doesn't. Your ability to work sustainably and to work in a way that is going to move your business forward is going to move you forward personally. That is your ability to work even in a healthy mental state. All of this directly affects your business growth. It is not the amount of time that you work, and so this is where we go into the first personal story from me. I can say that I was someone who very easily let it off to believe that I was this successful workaholic. I was working all the time. I was married to this business that I had started, and I let it show in every aspect except for those who were looking at me from the outside. They just saw someone who worked hard and probably was successful, but the people on the inside of my life that dealt with every day, they would see how frantic I was, how much I did not have a schedule to the work that I was doing, and I think a lot of this comes from, if you're in this space, hopefully you are listening to this podcast because you are a new entrepreneur or maybe you're shifting your lifestyle into entrepreneurship and you don't know where to start. It's difficult. There are so many different realms of entrepreneurship, and there's a lot that we have to learn how to balance. There's a lot that we have to learn how to blend, and I knew none of that when getting into this. It's funny. I look back now, and I'm like, huh, if I would have just maybe shifted or even just given myself a schedule a little bit, I probably would have been so much more successful if I had asked questions instead of just pretending like I knew everything. That's a whole other episode in itself. We will talk about that, just pretending like you're a know-it-all when you're not, but this story, this specific moment when I think I kind of woke up to myself, or maybe I even did it in that moment, but now I can go back and I can look like, you idiot. You are so insane. Why did you think that that was the right time to do this? Long story short, I co-owned a clothing fashion boutique, and in this, I dove so deep. I loved this. It was great. It was my step into entrepreneurship, figuring out things that I love, and it really was. It was a good learning curve for me in this business, and it was what it was supposed to be in my life. I know that, but it's funny because of these certain aspects of the business that I took kind of to myself like, oh, well, I want to make sure, because I have a background in photography and it's very important to me, I wanted to make sure that we had some good photos that were on our website. Looking back, it's so silly because, yes, a quality photo can sell your product, but if you are bending over backwards to get that quality photo and you are making other people bend over backwards for you to get that quality photo, it's not going to work. This specific incident, I was trying to make the opportunity to take photos anywhere I could, and this one, it was a family holiday, a family holiday, and I thought, you know what? This is a great idea. I brought my camera and, oh, I see my cousin or whatever is wearing one of these sweaters that we have, and so I'm going to pop her outside and I'll take some pictures of her, and then, oh, I just happened to have some more clothing items in my car, so maybe I'll just throw those on them as well and we'll knock this out real quick. At a family holiday, like, absolutely not, and now I look back at that like, girl, did you have no boundaries whatsoever, and no, I didn't. I didn't have any boundaries on when I was going to stop working or start working, and I didn't have a schedule with absolutely anything. If you're in the product-based business, this is for you really quickly because I know how difficult it is to keep up with the online world and your products unless you have a set schedule for when those products arrive. This is, you know, I have experience in the boutique industry. I get that. I get how difficult it is, but my one simple advice to you is to always, always, always have a schedule. Never just throw something on. Never just throw something out there. It's not going to work out, and you want to know the reality is that I ended up reshooting these photos anyway. I ended up reshooting them anyway because I wasted all that time, and then they weren't what I wanted them to be, or maybe I needed it a minute. I really don't even remember, but I switched them anyway, and so I spent all that time on a family holiday working even though, you know, sometimes it doesn't seem like work because it is fun, and I didn't mind that aspect of it, but I, again, I wouldn't turn it off. I never shut it off. I was always doing sometimes, you know, just research or, you know, oh, what else can I throw my way? What other business can I start? And whatever business you are in, especially entrepreneurship, you've heard this a million times. Entrepreneurs would rather work 80 hours for themselves than work 40 hours for someone else, but is that sustainable? Is it sustainable for you to actually work that much? Do you actually have to work that much? Do you actually have to sit at your laptop every night until 1 a.m. and then get up the next morning and go about your day and continue to work? Is every opportunity an opportunity to grow your business? Maybe, but does it need to be? No, and so those are those things that I want you to take away from this is that when you are, you're obsessed with it. You're like me. I know you are, and you're obsessed. You love to get obsessed with things, and so it's easy for you to just kind of dive in, do all this research, and be excited, and then, but that, this isn't even what this episode is about, but that's the road to burnout. That is what burnout is. That is, it's constantly making yourself go, go, go until you have no more fuel. You cannot keep going, and you end up hating the thing that you once loved, and I think if you have been in that situation before, it's hard. It's really difficult to get out of it, and it's hard to pull yourself away from this workaholic mindset that just because I'm an entrepreneur does not mean that I work all the time. I'm an entrepreneur because working and building my own business gives me the freedom to live my life. And then, this all brings me to my next point. This is something that I am growing in every day, and that is why I started this podcast, so that we can grow in this together, which is balancing ambition and well-being, and then, redefining your productivity. What does this look like in your lifestyle? Because it looks different all the time, and it looks different if you're a parent. It looks different if you have help. It looks different if you have one day a week that you can work. It looks different if you're a parent. It looks different if you have a job. It looks different if you have one day a week that you can work. It looks different if you have one hour every day that you can work. That is when you are going to be the most productive, and that is your area of productivity is in this work time frame, and you have to have a plan. That goes back to the story. That's why nothing ever got done in that aspect because I never had a plan. Am I a planner? Kind of. Do I just grab things when opportunities come? Yes, and that's why the plan is necessary for this success in your building your business. I opened up some questions, and so I'm going to answer those the best that I can. One of the questions was, can you share tips for setting meaningful goals that align with your values and overall well-being? This is very broad, but yes, because meaningful goals, this is, you know, it's the one through ten rule. What are the top ten things that you need to do today? Enter all of them, including the things in your business, including the things maybe in your home, including the things in your relationship, your kids, whatever it is, the top ten things you need to do today. If your business is in there, how can you fit that into your day to where you can be 100 percent present with that time? If not, then you need to move it. You need to move it to another day because then you're going to have to do it again anyway. That's what I've noticed in my life. If I sit down, and I didn't plan anything, and I'm just kind of, you know, willy-nilly, you know, maybe I'm editing a session, and then I get interrupted like five times, and then I have to go back anyway because I kind of sped through them, or I didn't, I wasn't productive. That's what happens if you're not just, you're not intentionally working with a plan. I always come into these podcast episodes with a very detailed outline because I know that I someday will just stray off, and I will talk about absolutely nothing, and I want this to be so valuable for you. I want you to take something out of this, and so that's a tip for that. You just, like, it's simple. It is. It's simple, but it's so hard, right, with everything. Everything is so simple, and yet it's so hard, and so, and that, again, comes into something a little bit deeper. I think a lot of us are entrepreneurs for multiple reasons. Sometimes it's because of the flexibility. Sometimes it's because of the flexibility of income. Sometimes it's for fun. Sometimes it's for your family. Sometimes it's for the flexibility of your family. There are so many reasons, and I hope to get, you know, some really awesome, awesome peers and fellow entrepreneurs on here just to share their stories with you, and I want this to be that platform to where, you know, everybody can find someone that they relate to a little bit because I think that's so beautiful in entrepreneurship when you really just, your lifestyle aligns with someone else's, and you can just let it out, and they get it, and that's what's really cool about an entrepreneur world is that we're all willing to share those things. We're willing to kind of, most of us, I'd say, we're willing to open up those struggles and to say, yeah, you know, I just, I really had this struggle with this last week, or I'm a parent, and I stay home with my kids while I try to work, and this is what it looks like for me, or, you know, I send my kids off during the day, and I work from home, but I still have struggles. You know, all of these things, I think, are very, they're very beautiful in the way that we can connect with each other, and I just love it, but your values are going to be part of those. Your values are going to be what is the most valuable, what's your, it's very cheesy for me to say what's your why, because I know we've all heard that a thousand times, and I do. I think it's cheesy. I think it's a lot deeper than that, and again, this is a whole other episode, but your values really align with that, too, and they are going to correlate with what your reasoning is behind what you are doing and your passion, and so make sure that those values are clear, because if they're not, then your productivity is going to revolve around those, and if your values aren't set standards of what you, what your mission is in your business, maybe the type of client that you serve, maybe the type of, you know, specific service that you provide or product that you sell, whatever it is, if your values, your core of your business is not necessarily aligned, the productivity, again, you're going to end up in that hamster wheel, because you're not really sure why you're doing this. You just kind of think you should, and then this brings me to my last point, and this comes from, right now, this is what I'm doing. I'm owning up to my mistakes, learning from my mistakes, and then building a sustainable work ethic, because we can have great work ethic without being a workaholic, and a great work ethic and a great line of values, productivity, a great plan can foster this success that you want, can foster that income, can, you know, create growth in your business in ways that you could never see if you are constantly having all of these things going at once and never an end goal for any of them. I am one, I will tell you firsthand, if I have my hand in just one basket, my life is not fulfilling its purpose. My point of life, I know why I'm here, is to be that girl that, oh yeah, like she kind of does it all, but that doesn't mean that I do it all constantly, and that doesn't mean that I do it all without purpose, and there's a big difference, and so you can just learn from these lessons that I have learned and from other entrepreneurs that open up about this journey, that just because you're a workaholic and maybe assuming that someone else has success, that doesn't necessarily mean that it's true. If you think that maybe you are heading down this path, maybe some signs, maybe you have, you know, tried to work on a holiday, maybe you're obsessed with just working every evening, maybe you, you know, you push other things aside that you might really have fun doing, and there's a difference in being disciplined and being a workaholic for sure, 100 percent, because there is a tremendous amount of discipline that comes with being an entrepreneur and growing your business, but if you are just, if you're just working for the sake of saying, you know, I worked on my business for 10 hours today, yeah, but what happened with that? Did you get anywhere? Did you get anything done? Did you actually create something? Did you, you know, or did you just scroll on Instagram for 20 minutes and, you know, two hours, comparing yourself to a bunch of other businesses, because that was me often, all the time, because I would look at someone else and in their success that they were sharing, my assumption was that they were just working all the time and that's how they got success, but that's not true at all, and the advice that I really want to leave you with is if you see yourself getting into that workaholic mindset and that frame of the hamster wheel, where you are just running around in circles, adding more things, saying yes to more things, never getting anything done, being, you know, everything at once to everyone, my advice is one thing at a time, drop something, or set it for, you know, like every Tuesday is when you do X, Y, Z, or if your business allows, hire it out, because you are the brains and you are the brand behind your business. That does not mean that someone else can't do part of it for you. That's why it's called building a business. That is what building a business is. It's allowing other people to come into your business or maybe freelance style to do those things so that you have time for actual sustainable growth in your business instead of just trying to do everything at once and, you know, let's be honest, like doing it half-assed. You're not gonna, you're not gonna put your full self into this if you are doing it constantly, and at the end of the day, remember those values that make you a person that has great work ethic, and if you're not, and if you're trying to get to that point, like me, we're all trying to get to that point. We're all trying to come up with these systems that are enabling us to have a productive work day in our business so that we can do more of our lives. That is why I am an entrepreneur. If you want to know, you know, my cheesy why, that's it. I want to, I want to know that I am making an impact in the world, and I also am present in my life so that I can put this out there, whatever it may be, whatever is happening, whatever is coming up, I can put all that out there. I can touch the heart of someone that is going through it, someone that is lost, someone that is stuck, someone that is just questioning if they should even enter this world of entrepreneurship because it sounds really scary and crazy. All of those things, that's for you. That's for you, and that's what I am called to do. I feel it in my gut, and as much as I continue to talk about it, I am still in the sense that I want to live, I want to live my life and enjoy it, and I want that, you know, the freedom of time, and that's what, that's what happens when you create these businesses that you are able to live your life and also serve your purpose. So, real quick, we're going to get into the personal details of what I have done to change this lifestyle for myself, and how maybe you can move forward in that way, too. First up, what change have I made, and what am I continuing to do moving forward? I have carved out a specific time where I work, and I have, I have not taken my laptop to a coffee shop or a bar in a long time because I don't find success there. Sometimes I do, and sometimes I need, you know, to be somewhere else, but I am not going to have a successful working hour, two hours, or whatever, if I, one, run into someone I know, or if I just sit there and turn it into a social hour with myself, and I realize that I need those things separated from my work. Yes, I absolutely love going to, you know, grab a cocktail or a cup of coffee or anything with friends. That has to be separate from when I am working, and for the longest time, I kept those, like, yes, I can work and, you know, go get coffee with my friend at the same time. I can't. I am not that type of person. If you are, maybe it works for you, but if not, that is one I have changed immensely in the past couple of months that has helped my business actually make some solid footprints in the ground instead of just, like, grazing over the sand and it getting washed away. Hopefully that analogy helped. It worked in my head, and the second thing is rebuild those relationships that maybe your workaholism has or is taking a toll on, and then prioritize your family, and this is, it is honestly so simple because I think we overcomplicate it, and we all, you know, have a whole episode on how to marry your business to your family because it is, it is, it is a little bit like that and, like, the healthy way to do it and the unhealthy way to do it, but for today's, you know, all intents and purposes, I just want you to make sure that, yeah, like, prioritizing your family means just creating intentional time. It doesn't have to be, it doesn't have to be constant. It doesn't have to be all day. You make intentional time for your business. You make intentional time for your family. Maybe that means getting in a scenario where you can't work or you can't really think about your business, getting yourself out of your head. Maybe don't go to a place where you'll just want to network and find more people that maybe know or don't know who you are. That's talking to my heart right now because I always, always love to make new connections, and I just, I love to meet other business owners, and I love to, you know, widen my, widen my network. That's my, that's my jam. I want all of these people in this network, in this community because I think it's awesome, but if I am, you know, I was my family and my goal is to, oh, who can I meet? Who can I connect with? Then I'm not prioritizing my family. I'm prioritizing myself, and so that's just the simple, the simple switch. Do something that is going to prioritize your family. 100% of your attention some of the time is better than 60% of your attention all the time. I promise you. And then the final point is just to stay with that advice that I gave you earlier. Stay with those steps. Prioritize your day. Prioritize your business. Prioritize what's next, and don't get too caught up in the, in the fun things. Does it make sense? The fun things for me were, you know, like researching or comparing myself to other brands or finding other businesses or looking up their websites and how I could copy them. Like, it's fun to do that, but it takes so much time, and honestly, it blocks your creativity because then it's not yours. It's yours based on what you saw them do, and so when you are able to bring yourself out of that comparison game and you're not constantly um, you're not constantly blocked by that, then you can actually sit down and you can just create. You can just grow. You can just, you can line up your perfect client because they're going to be perfect for you, not perfect for the person that you saw that was doing this business that you thought you could do it too. You're very different from them. You're not the same person, and so when you keep going into these, um, these workaholic, you know, sets of your life, that's one of those things that's going to keep you there. It's going to keep you there because it's, it's work. It's taking away from your time, and it's causing you this, you know, back to the wheel. It's causing you this roundabout way of just never actually getting anything done. You can look to other people for, you know, some support and maybe a little bit of, uh, you know, if you're in a creative rut sometimes, but I really, really just highly suggest to pull out of that as much as you can and do it yourself because that's what you sell. You are going to sell, and you are going to serve the way that you are, not the way that you saw someone else do it because it's not going to work the same. Whether you suffer as a workaholic or you're afraid, maybe you might get into that a little bit deeper. Don't forget at the bottom of the show notes today, I do have a link to my free guide and questions that you can answer and maybe just a little bit of an outline of this episode that will help you move forward, and it's just something that you can keep with you. You can go back to it. You can go back to these notes. You can follow through. You can check up on yourself every couple of weeks, and if you need that, you know, I just highly suggest just go and grab it. It's free. It's for you. All these things I have created, I want this to just be something where we are fostering, and we are growing this community, and we are really just digging deep into why we're here, what we are doing, what our purpose is, and as entrepreneurs, how we can just better ourselves so that we have that freedom of time, and we have the freedom of our relationships and our family and all of these things that we love so dearly because of our passion for entrepreneurship, which is your purpose. I am Mallory. Thank you for listening along, and I'll see you next week.