Christmas Freestyle 2

The discussion revolves around popular Christmas classics and how they may not be as innocent as they seem. Frosty the Snowman is compared to Chucky, and it is suggested that he may be a sex offender. The Grinch is analyzed as a three-part series, with the first part being Horton Hears a Who. The Grinch's issues stem from feeling ostracized, and his stealing of Christmas is seen as a way to take away the noisy gifts that were the Who's defense mechanism against extinction. Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer is interpreted as a symbol of the civil rights movement or child labor laws, as his inclusion on Santa's team is seen as an act of convenience rather than genuine acceptance. The conversation also touches on people's desire for snow during Christmas, despite it being an inconvenience. Here we go. All right. And we're back right here on the unemployment line. Doc and Larry P discussing, I'm not quite sure what we're talking about. Yeah, so we just talked about Christmas. And we're about to kind of like, in this sense, we're about to ruin a couple of childhoods. We're going to talk about some of your favorite classics. And kind of just break those down and just let y'all know that y'all's classic ain't really what y'all thought it is. If you take Frosty the Snowman, for example, Frosty is an anatomic object that miraculously comes to life when you put a hat on his head. And they made horror stories kind of like around it, saying, oh, Frosty the Snowman is like a villain. And then they made a couple of child-friendly movies where Frosty the Snowman. They made horror stories where Frosty the Snowman is a villain. What's wrong with y'all? But they made another one where it was a dad that died. And then he came into the snowman. It was a more heartwarming. At the end of the day, what makes Frosty the Snowman any different than Chucky? So then that makes you think as well, is Frosty the Snowman really a magical snowman or the spirit of something? And if I think about it really deeply, Frosty the Snowman. I would prefer you not to think about it that deeply. Frosty the Snowman may be a sex offender. OK, Larry. I'm just saying, though. You need help. I'm just saying, though, he comes around. He plays with kids. He wants to see how he can play with the kids longer. He wants to go to the North Pole so he doesn't go away or he doesn't melt. Let me ask you this. I think we've done a Christmas movie draft. But I want to talk about the more traditional Christmas stories. Amongst the Rudolphs, the Frosties, et cetera, what is your go-to favorite holiday classic? None of them. Friday Afternoons, maybe. I'm not talking about film. So if Frosty or Rudolph. Honestly, it would be The Grinch until. The Grinch, OK. But if you really want me to do this, The Grinch ain't really what we thought it is. OK. I'm here for this. Go ahead. So The Grinch is technically a three-part series. And it's the third part of a story, right? And it's kind of like dark when you think about it, right? So The Grinch is where he's at, Whoville with the Who's. When do we finally get introduced to the Who's of Whoville? Well, according to your version, part three. No, part two. You get introduced to the Who's because Horton hears a Who. Oh, that's crazy. Right, right. But it's a three-part series because the first part of Horton, Horton in his first book was trying to protect the bird or something like that. But the first part just illustrates who Horton is as an elephant, as a person and whatnot. The second part, Horton hears a Who. And basically, the Who's are like microscopic people. And they're living on this, what the other thing is? The little pixie dust little flower thing? They're living on that. And basically, when you think about it, like the Who's of Whoville, Horton basically is like, hey, man, all my friends keep trying to kill y'all. And I'm trying to keep y'all alive because I'm the only person with big enough ears to hear y'all. So y'all got to make a whole bunch of noise to let them know that y'all around so everybody can hear y'all, right? Because the Who's of Whoville used to be quiet people. But now, they make a bunch of noise at the end of Horton hears a Who. And the other people, the other animals are like, oh, like Horton went crazy. Like, he really could hear. Like, it's people inside that thing. So they thought it was a joke to try to kill those people. But they start banging and clashing on everything. So you get to the Grinch and the Who's of Whoville. The Grinch hates the Who's of Whoville because all they do is bang and clash and make noise. Well, that's also not the complete story about what the Grinch's issues were. First of all, the Grinch, he's rude. And a lot of people thought he was not aesthetically pleasing as a human or as a Who. Because the Grinch is actually a Who. He's just a green Who. And, you know, he just didn't fit in with his community. He didn't fit in with his peer. He didn't fit in with the friendship group he was trying to establish. And it was kind of like, hey, bruh, like, skedaddle. And so when he started to feel ostracized, him and his dog went up to Living on Mountains and decided, hey, we're just going to be up here. We're going to do our thing. And we're not going to be acknowledging what they got going on down in Whoville. And the way that the story picks up is the Grinch decides, upon a whim, like, you know, I'm just trying to live in isolation. I'm trying to do my thing. And y'all trying to force this Christmas on me. And I ain't feeling it. You know, I am an orphan. And my family wasn't around. And I don't want to be a part of all of this Christmas stuff. And so then the Grinch decides, hey, you know what? If I ain't happy, ain't nobody going to be happy. And he decides to steal Christmas. What if I told you that the Grinch stealing the Christmas was the Grinch stealing the only bane of their existence? Because all they live for is Christmas? No. It wasn't even Christmas. The Christmas gifts they got were loud noises and everything. You got to think, and it's important to hear the Who. They were just seconds away from genocide and being destroyed as a people. So all they know, their only defense mechanism is to make as much noise as possible. So all day long, they make as much noise. All the gifts they get on Christmas, they making as much noise. So people say, like, hey, at the end of the Grinch, the Whos of Whoville gathered around the Christmas tree and started singing because they loved the holiday. The spirit wasn't the present. The spirit was the people and the family. They were actually singing because the Grinch took all these noisemakers. So they had to basically sing to be like, hey, y'all, we're trying to survive. This is a traumatized community at this point that has been on the brink of extinction. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, the hotline ring. But they have been on the brink of extinction multiple times. And the only way that they know how to survive is to make enough noise. Because you got to think, Horton passed the little pixie thing off to a kangaroo at the end of Horton Hears a Who. And the only way that the kangaroo knows that they're around is if they're making noise. So all they do is make noise all day long. And the Grinch was like, man, I'm taking all them noisemakers. I'm going to ask a very important question. What were the reindeer doing every other Christmas before Rudolph got there? Well, see, with Rudolph, man, I really think Rudolph is really, Rudolph got the short end of the stick when it comes to that whole debacle. Because he was getting bullied. He was getting mistreated, all this stuff. Nobody wanted him to play and join the reindeer games and stuff. One freaking winter, it's a blizzard. And Santa's like, hey, man, we could use that red-nosed reindeer right there to guide us through and show us the way to where we. And which, really, you think about it, Rudolph really ain't no, Rudolph really ain't. He ain't traveled these roads. He don't know where he going. He don't know where he going. So that's a GPS necessary. So all you did was just, you got a beacon that's flying, but he could be flying you right into a mountain. Big fact. And then, but then when you really think about it, it's the short end of the stick. Because they're like, oh, Rudolph saved Christmas. But really, all Santa did was hook him up. And Santa really knew where to go. He just couldn't see where he was going. Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer is really about the civil rights movement, when you think about it. Because what happened is, huh? I thought it was about child labor laws. Mm. Because you got to think about it, man. It's not a blizzard every winter. It's not a blizzard every Christmas. So at this point, you got, yeah, Rudolph, your beacon is bling, bling, bling. It's no good or inconvenient. Well, we don't get a lot of snow down here. But, uh. Well, that's why I'm asking. Because, you know, we're in the South. It's no good or inconvenient, right? I think it's inconvenient. I can't tell you the benefits of snow. I can tell you the benefits of rain. I can't really tell you the benefits. Well, I could tell you the benefits of rain, of where it cools down. Rain, like, cool it down and talk about, you know. Rain, like, it waters the plants. It cools down, like, if it's really hot, like, in the summertime, and it rains, like, you, yeah, we need something to, like, balance this, like, heat, like, cool it down. But, like, in the wintertime, when it snows, like, it's already cold, my dog. I understand a lot, but also, people get excited about the idea of winter weather. So, like, on one end, yeah, it's inconvenient. But at the same time, like, there's a level of family aspect that goes along with it. Nobody ever asks for snow. Nobody asks for snow. People do ask for snow. No, people want snow. It's like, people wanting snow is, like, it's going to sound bad. If it sounds bad, you probably shouldn't say it. People wanting snow is like women wanting a Hollywood relationship, like what they see on the TV. Like, it's something that you see, and you're like, oh, that would be real cool if I can get it. But it's not really what you think it is. Like, people want snow because they see it. Like, you watch Christmas movies, snow. You watch Santa Claus, snow. You watch winter movies, snow. So you think of the perfect Christmas would have snow. So people want snow just because they see it. And that's just the perfect reality. Nobody wants snow. Nobody in their life wants snow. People up north, when people actually get snow, they tired of it. They move south to get away from the snow. Nobody wants snow. Snow is the biggest inconvenience of life, especially, like, when you get it. You've got to rake it out the way. You've got to rake your yard, rake your driveway. You've got to get the snow plow to come in and clear the roads and stuff like that. And then even after you do all that, the road's all slippery and icy and stuff like that. So now you've got to think, oh, now I've got to put chains on my tires so I can drive through all this stuff like this. Nobody wants to deal with that. Here's my issue with home alone. My biggest gripe is, why are so many people staying in the same house but also traveling? My biggest issue with home alone is, you cannot tell me what's the difference between home alone and Die Hard. OK, explain yourself. Because these two grown men were trying to kill a kid. Shout out to Joe Pesci. What were they trying to do in Die Hard? I've never seen Die Hard. They were trying to kill Bruce Willis. And Bruce Willis was setting up booby traps and killing the Russians just as Macaulay Culkin was setting up booby traps and taking out the Bandit Brothers. OK, I'm going to give you a short list of movies that I'm familiar with that I have not actually watched. The Godfather. The Godfather. This is another conversation for another day. No, it's for today. The Godfather's over it. Ooh, talk that talk. I've never sat and watched it. So I think The Godfather at the time when it came out, I think The Godfather was. Maybe by Godfather. Godfather 2 is a better movie than Godfather 1. That's what I've heard. I've never watched either. But Godfather 2 itself still isn't really a good movie because a lot of like, they try to tell us the past. You would want to say by the time Godfather 3 came out, that Godfather 3 should have like. Godfather 3 was awful. Exactly. So Godfather 1 is pretty much like the original. But it's so many like pockets of like unnecessary, like you really don't know what's happening. Like at one point, like the brother gets in the car. He's like, how about that drive? And then he drives to like the little stop and gets shot up by the people. And then like you go back and like the mama cook the spaghetti. You don't really know what happened. Like what was the shooting part of it? Like it's not like, you've got to kind of like piece The Godfather movie into your head. But you've got to like, some, like today you watch a movie, all these connect, the dots connect. You're connecting the dots to yourself in Godfather 1. As like, you probably get to the end of the movie. He's still trying to figure out what just happened. But by the time Godfather 2 rolls around, they try to basically connect those dots and they go back to the past and say, this is where Don Corleone came from and all this other stuff. I think at this point, I think in Godfather 2, did this man go back to Sicily? I think he goes back to Sicily. The wife gets blown up in a car. The Godfather 2, Godfather 1, they both blend together. But the only reason Godfather 2 is a better movie than Godfather 1, is because Godfather 2 actually connected more dots for you. Why are we so obsessed with the mafia? Because the government tore them down. The government, the government hates... Organized crime? No, they just hate organized business. At the end of the day, they hate it. They hate the fact that all these people can figure out a way to make money, but the government can't figure out a way to make money. That's how organized crime is. The mob itself, there's a bunch of documentaries on the mafia about, what's Ruby Giuliani and all them boys that's out there. They was just determined to tear down the mafia because the mafia was learning how to... First of all, the government should have never made alcohol illegal, because that was really the entire lift of the mafia. That's how the Kennedy's came into power. You know? You know what? You know what? We're going to continue this next segment. It's the other part of life.