Trait #1: Anger

The speaker expresses gratitude for being in good health and discusses the importance of removing ruinous traits from the heart to be closer to Allah. Anger is identified as the first trait to be uprooted, distinguishing between permissible and impermissible anger. The negative effects of anger are described, including the loss of divine help and the damage caused to relationships. The speaker emphasizes the need for self-reflection and repentance to overcome anger, offering a dua for protection from anger. The importance of consciousness and connection with a spiritual guide is stressed, highlighting the need for proper connection beyond mere imagination. Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah, Thumma Alhamdulillah, Beloved muridin, muhibbin, Assalamualaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuhu Alhamdulillah, our gratitude to Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala for having able us to be here in this very blessed evening in the state of good health and iman. May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala increase our iman and our taqwa until our very last days. Amin Ya Rabbal Alameen. In our discussion, in our sharing of sohbah of ruinous traits, so the past few weeks we've been talking about what are the traits that a murid needs to get over to unweed or to cut down, to cut it off but cut down. Cut down in that sense, to unrood this so that we can achieve heart that is pure in order for us to raise, to be closer to Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. And last week we read from the hadith of Sayyidina Abdullah ibn Mas'ud who narrated how An-Nabi s.a.w. he was describing how the amal, the good worship, the worship that we've done did not reach to the presence of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala and in fact he was thrown back, he was cursed because when they were doing this good deed it was accompanied with backbiting, it was accompanied with ego, accompanied with all of these ruinous traits. So then what happens, the good deeds were not accepted. So in the path of Tariqah, in the path of Sufiyah, the goal is to unrood this from the heart. Then we can realize and we can understand that the heart is like a Ka'bah as we have mentioned the past few weeks as well. That it has the potential to praise Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala continuously. Something that the body cannot do but only the heart can. So if we take care of the heart and we understand the heart then we can praise Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala and that is the point of proximity, closeness to Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. That even when our mouth is not able to say its words, the heart is continuously saying the name of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. So the first of the ruinous traits according to ulama is anger, ghadabah. Rasulullah s.a.w. was once approached by a companion and he says, Ya Rasulullah, give me advice, s.a.w. and Rasulullah s.a.w. says, la taghdab, do not get angry. La taghdab, three times he said this. Ya Rasulullah, give me advice, la taghdab, give me advice, la taghdab, give me advice, la taghdab. So it is mentioned, anger is like intoxication. Once you take it, you will be intoxicated. It is just like drinking khamar, liquor. It is like drinking alcohol. So there are two types of anger. Anger which is good and wajib and anger which is haram. So we are discussing about anger which is haram here, not anger which is wajib. So anger which is wajib is defending the family, defending the self, protecting the dignity of the self, protecting the property of the self, protecting the shariah, upholding the sunnah, protecting your womanfolk, defending one Muslim from another, etc. Why? Because a Muslim is safe from another Muslim's words and action. So when anger creeps in, and Nabi s.a.w. said this to Sayyidina Abu Bakr as-Siddiq, that anger is almost like unbelief. Anger is almost like being in a state of unbelief. Wrong anger, not right anger. And that is why, if you remember, I was sharing with you the story of the Sufi Sheikh who had the wrestler who wanted to be his murid. So the Sheikh was training the murid to control his anger. So the uprising of anger comes because of ignorance. And detachment of the self from Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. So when the person is detached from Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala in the state of anger, then whatever we do, we are on our own. We are not going to receive the help. This is wrong anger, you must remember. You are not going to receive the help of the Prophet s.a.w. Khataf. But what happens is, this is when shaitan is going to come and he will take over. So when you look at people who are angry, their faces are for the wrong reasons. Their faces mimic something which is scary. Their face can transform into something which is very ugly. Yang menyeramkan, that scares you, that fears you. Their eyes become something which is demonic in that sense. And their actions become something which is violent. This is why there is no belief at that point of time. So there is no madad, no help. There is no help because Awliya Allah s.a.w. will not help until you overcome your anger. So this is where if we look at the journey of those who want to repent, they must make the first step, initiative. Remember I said the Sufi must have initiative. Initiative in taking care of ourselves, our belongings, our family, our children, how are they behaving, etc. All this initiative. And also our own self. How are we behaving? Are we taking care of ourselves? No initiative. No Awliya s.a.w. is going to spoon feed you. But we live in a world of privilege. Everything must be fed, everything must be given. But the Sufi is not like that. If everything must be like that, then by itself we inject a computer chip in you. That program you how to think and how to behave. Then it is just the mind, there is no ruh, dead already. It is just as dead. No difference. There is the story of this boy who was always angry. So his father said, each time you are angry, you need to go to the fence at the back. A wooden fence, what you call it, a picket rail. So go to the fence and put in, hammer in one nail. So the boy had no, of course the father said he had to do, so he did. So each time he was angry for that day, he nailed. Initially he had a lot of nails. A lot of nails. Until one day, for about a few weeks, he didn't put any nails. One day too, he knocked, he was angry, he had to go back to the backyard, knock. Knock in a nail, knock in a nail, knock in a nail. Then the father said, okay, for this many days you do not knock in any nails, right? No. Okay, good. Now I want you to take out all the nails that you have knocked. For the day that you are able to control your anger, you take out. This is a long process. Finally he took out, and then the father told him, look, even if you have taken out the nails, the holes are there. Which means the damage you have done with the anger will always be permanent. Even if you are able to control it, the damage you have done with your anger is what? Permanent, you have taken out the nail, right? That means you are no longer angry already. But the damage you have done, who is going to replace that hole now? That is why then comes the way of us knowing ourselves. That is why it becomes more difficult now. Because now you have to deal with the hearts of others that you have angered. A Muslim is saved from another Muslim's words and action. Now you have hurt that Muslim. How are you going to deal with that Muslim? You see the effects. That is why anger is the first one we need to uproot. Wrong anger. Wrong anger. Anger which is the anger that appeases the ego. You get what I am trying to say? Not the anger that displeases the ego. Anger that displeases the ego is what? You see the plates, dishes are not being done. You feel a bit annoyed. What do you do? You call your mate and do it. That is what people nowadays do. They get angry with the mate. But they are not angry with their ego for not being able to wash the dishes. You see a lot of laundry not being done. So what do you do? Leave it in the magic basket. That the TikTok people keep talking about. Right? No. You should go and wash the thing. Same thing if you look into the mirror. And if you see that there are things that need to be corrected. What do you do? The right anger. Which is the anger of Fitrah who will direct you to make yourself better. This is known as the Jihadul Akbar. But if you keep looking outside and find reasons to be angry. Then trust me there will be many nails to knock. There will be many nails to knock. And when you finally understand. You realize when you take out the nails it will be too late. Because why? Rasul s.a.w. is watching us and he says. He is handling this with his ego and nafs. Let him handle it on his own. That is the danger of anger which stems from the ego. And the anger that stems from the nafs. The sheikhs won't help. No one will help. Unless and until you have truly repented. And then you say Ya Allah. I want to seek remedy from the false ego. This ego. This illusion that it causes on me. You get what I am trying to say? What is the answer? Bashir wa Nazirah. Rasul s.a.w. was sent as Bashir wa Nazirah. And then he is sent in many other surahs as the one who witnesses. So Rasul s.a.w. is continuously witnessing. And when we do our anger with our own ego. Then there is no way around it. You get what I am trying to say? There are many duas for anger. There are many amal for anger. One of it is in the prayers for the anxious heart. The second dua after the... Remember the second dua? Remember? That one. Yes. That is the one. What was it? Can I borrow that? Thank you. Sometimes you have to read the whole thing and it comes up. Never mind. أعوذ بك من شر النفس ومن شر شيطان وشركه وأن أقتراف على نفس سوءا أو أجره إلى المسلمين This one. So Allah protect me from my nafs. Protect me from shaitan. Protect me from all of the other whisperings that causes this destruction. This is a dua that our Prophet s.a.w. has given for anger. So recite this many times. But no use reciting it if you are still going to work with your ego. So anger is something that can only be overcome with consciousness. Taqwa. So what we must do? We must constantly be connected with our Murshid. Sit down. Do your tasawwur. Do your tasawwur. Do your tasawwur. The reason today... I mean the reason in this day and age why tasawwur for tariqah teachings is not taking its effect because murids are not connecting properly. But they create this illusion that they are connected. I always say this. Why? They think by imagining the shaykh they are connected. But you need to connect with the hal of the shaykh, the spirit. You need the condition of the shaykh. How is he? What does he do? How does he overcome things? That you must connect. The spirit of how he does his work. Then you are connecting with your Murshid. If not, you are just imagining. And when you imagine, nafsu can come and create a thousand and one nonsense. This is the trick or the pitfall of the nafs. So for today, the first ruinous trait, the trait that ruins us, khusur, is anger. Anger for the wrong reasons. So what we must do is try to stay connected. Focus, be vigilant. If the anger is rising, ask for help. No need to call. If you need to call, means your connection is not strong. You get what I am trying to say? If you are angry and you call, means the connection is not strong. You are depending on physical connection. Anger is the work of shaytan as well. Wrong anger. Because shaytan works on the ego to infuriate you for no reason. Destroy things. That is what shaytan does. Destroy things. But good anger, what do they do? It destroys the evilness. There is a hadith that says, there are people who kill people for the wrong reasons. The one is killed and the one being killed, Rasulullah s.a.w. said both are wrong. They say why? Because both infuriate each other. They cause each other a lot of hatred. So the tafsir of this is that the ego infuriates the nafs and then they start to fight each other within themselves. So there is nafsu and then there is ego. Then these people cannot get ni'mah. They will never get ni'mah. They will never be happy. But if anger is used for the right reason, to fight for just, to fight for the weak, to fight for even that, if along the way you put in your ego, then you are cut off from spiritual health. That is why Sayyidina Ali s.a.w. Like he was in jihad. Then what happened? One of the person he was fighting spat at him. And he was already there about to win the battle. The enemy spat at his face. Then Sayyidina Ali walked away. This is in the heat of battle. Everybody is also spirited. Yet Sayyidina Ali is very what? Very conscious. Taqwa. So he walked away. When he walked away, the enemy says, I am here, now kill me. He says, no. If I kill you now, it is out of my anger. So which means what? While he was fighting, there was no wrong anger. But his fighting is for the reason to uphold justice. That is why the Muslims are very successful then. But Muslims today are easily angered because they are all befriending shaytan. They are not befriending Awliyaullah s.a.w. They are not sitting with Malaika. That is why they are very heavy, very dense. You see them, they are very what? Dense. There is no Nur. Because when you are angry, it takes away. And sometimes this anger can be very long. So it is like holding on to a fever. It does not cure. So if you are angry for 10 years, 10 years you fever. But the thing you are angry with, does the thing have fever? Does the thing have fever? No, the thing does not care. Or the person that you are angry with, he does not have the fever or she does not have the fever. You are the one who is holding on to the anger. You will die of that fever. Simple. Very simple. So the heart is the Kaabatullah. Can the Kaabatullah be angry for no reason? That means for that point of time, it becomes what? The palace of Iblis. We have said this in the retreat, remember? So it is not the Kaabah, but it becomes the palace of Iblis. When anger controls the heart, it becomes the palace of Iblis. Why? Because the blood is dirty there. They are not doing Zikir to cleanse their heart. Physically, spiritually, it becomes the palace of Iblis. May Allah protect us. So the cure is to be connected and to recite the Dua from Prayers for the Anxious Heart or Wirudus Salaam that I have mentioned just now. InshaAllah. Maybe one of you can share this onto the telegram group. And then others can benefit from this as well. And the points of this. So how do you finally understand which is good anger, what is bad anger? Seek knowledge, number one. And seek connection with your Sheikh properly. And then imagine if those... Already when you are angry for no reason, you are cut off from your Sheikh. What more if you are angry with your Sheikh? Oh, my Sheikh tests me. So I must show him I am KL gangster. You gangster KL je. You boleh tengok Sheikh, you may gangster kat mana. KL is dunia. But if he is the gangster of Malakut, what will happen? You get what I am trying to say. Sheikh, the gangster is gang... They are not gangsters la. But they don't retaliate, they don't have to. All they have to do is just take a step back and then let Allah handle. Simple. You get what I am trying to say. Anger is easy, forgiveness is difficult. You get what I am trying to say. When you misplace your anger on people who did not do anything wrong, right? The forgiveness from them is very difficult. And their duas, they are now being oppressed. Like what we see in Palestine. May Allah protect them. So people can enjoy their life, they think they are enjoying life. But they are only enjoying their physical life. But their ruh, their heart, because they are oppressing, they are pushing their anger on others. They want others to respect them. If others don't respect them, everybody must bow down to them. They are the one, they are leading the life of Iblis. Even if you pray, no difference. Because you are praying with your ego. Iblis also pray, correct or not? Iblis also had guidance. But Iblis was envious and angry with Adam and his descendants. So the descendants of Adam who chose anger, they have joined the camp of Iblis. Walaihauzabillah. Wrong anger. Must always remember this. Cannot be people come to your home and want to kidnap your wife. Please, I cannot be angry, please. That is wrong anger. That is cowardice. There is a fine line in defining this. So, wrong anger. People bump into you a bit. You go and shove the person. Do you know who I am or not? The fellow definitely say, I don't know. Who are you, who? I already say sorry, but you want to show your terrorness. Or you go and order mee rebus. Then the makcik forget to put the egg. Then you bring back the plate. Makcik say, what is this? Don't you know I want an egg? Makcik say, okay, I will give you egg. But now you are angry with me, I don't want to sell it to you. The makcik will take back the mee rebus and say, you go and eat. You go to the market, buy the mee kuning. You go and buy babas punya rencah. You go and buy a pot. You go and find a place to cook. You see. You are angry for the wrong people, the makcik cut off the risk from you. There are many examples for you to contemplate, to think. Why we are lacking of ni'mah in our lives. So the best way is to be connected. So come back to the way of Sayyidina Muhammad. Do your salawat. Ask for Rasulullah SAW to pray for you. Be sincere in it. Then Allah will open up ways for you to overcome this. Then bit by bit, the heart will understand, oh, this is wrong anger. This is good anger. Each time you feel anger is arising, quickly go and take wudu. These are all examples from the Prophet SAW. Then go and do your prayers. Go and sit down. Go and do your tasawwur. Connect with your murshid. So you are connected with the silsila. To receive the nur into the heart. So that the heart doesn't become the palace of iblis. But becomes the Kaabatullah. Where the heart is remembering Allah SWT. Because after this, it will go into the love of dunya. Once you are always entertained by your anger, then you will go easy into the love of the world. Once you enter the love of the world, very, very difficult. Insha'Allah. May Allah protect us. May Allah keep us people who are patient, insha'Allah. Whose hearts are expended with the presence of the nur of Sayyidina Muhammad. May our heart attract good people and good things into our life. And not be the heart that is darkened, that attract darkness into our lives. And may our thoughts and our knowledge, which is good, bring us to the light of the heart, insha'Allah. And goodness in understanding relationships and risky and blessings. So that we can appreciate our lives and all of the good things that Allah has given. And not be selfish and egoistic. And people who are short-sighted. And people who are, people who behave like shaytan. May Allah protect us from them, insha'Allah. Protect us from becoming them and protect us from them, insha'Allah. And make our children, people who are Awliya' Allah Sulihin. Protect all of us and make us all close to Him, insha'Allah. And bless our murshids and all of our teachers. Ameen. Ameen. Whatever is good is truly from the teachings of the Silsila. And I hope that we can benefit from them, insha'Allah.