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Are your emotional scars self-sabotaging you or helping you revalue your self-worth and grow your “mythic beauty”?
Details
Are your emotional scars self-sabotaging you or helping you revalue your self-worth and grow your “mythic beauty”?
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Are your emotional scars self-sabotaging you or helping you revalue your self-worth and grow your “mythic beauty”?
The speaker shares a personal experience of being mugged and how it left both physical and emotional scars. They discuss how emotional scars can affect one's self-worth and offer three ideas to neutralize negative comments and grow stronger. They emphasize understanding the motivations behind hurtful words, holding onto values and principles, and engaging constructively with critics. The speaker also mentions a situation where they defused a conflict and felt stronger as a result. They conclude by suggesting that emotional scars can bring strength and mythic beauty. Hello, Joe Megita and welcome to the Insight Post of the 28th of January 2024, How Emotional Scars Can Lead to Mythic Beauty. In 1988, returning to my flat in London late one night, I was mugged. In defence of the usual advice to submit and hand over the goods in these cases, I got angry and fought back. My attacker did not get my wallet but I needed 13 stitches for my face. I still carry the physical scars. I also carry mental scars. I react badly to people running up behind me on the pavement. However, I suspect the emotional scars would have been worse had my wallet been taken. As it is, my scars have, in some ways, left me feeling stronger. Do your emotional scars damage or devote your self-worth? We all get attacked occasionally with words and opinions rather than knives. Words thrown at us can cause severe emotional damage, often disproportionate to the comment. But verbal assault can also leave you feeling stronger if, like my mugging, you can parry them from a place of principle and integrity. As a parent, you have probably comforted and reassured your children when they have suffered unwarranted attacks. However, now that the kids are gone, your focus reverts to you. You likely feel vulnerable and those slings and arrows can hurt. So how can you neutralise those bad comments and put-downs, and more to the point, how can you use them to grow stronger? Well, here are three ideas. 1. Put yourself in the other person's shoes and determine why they say hurtful things. You will often discover that their attack on you is a defence mechanism triggered by their insecurity and vulnerability. 2. Be clear on your values and principles. These are more than armour, they are your core. Compare someone's spite to your integrity to gain perspective and reinforce your self-worth. 3. Engage constructively with your tormentor. Responding with understanding is difficult, but it's your opportunity to grow. Hence the expression, my worst enemy is my best friend. One morning, I got into a tussle with a local shopkeeper when I parked briefly in his space. As I drove off, I realised his insecurity. Made him feel I threatened his territory. I always parked considerably on a matter of principle, parking spaces being hard to come by in our town, so I understood his criticisms were unfounded. On returning late that day, I sought out my critic and made peace with him. In so doing, I defused the situation, confirmed my principles, and came out of the incident feeling vindicated and stronger. Emotional scars can develop mythic beauty. A condition called imagined ugliness makes some physical ordinary people think they are unattractive to other human beings. Sadly, a similar emotional condition exists in many who have taken heart to the unwarranted criticisms of others. Instead, let your emotional scars give you strength and mythic beauty.