Emily Bruni | Girl, Missing

A person named Sarah Jane is alive, and the narrator is exploring her features. The narrator is upset because Sarah Jane moved away and liked living with someone named Dale. The narrator worked hard to provide for Sarah Jane but feels hurt by her actions. Sarah Jane reveals that she has been tormenting the narrator by sending items through the door. The narrator realizes that Sarah Jane has been following her progress for years and wonders if she was the reason for their financial struggles. The narrator believes Dale used their relationship as a distraction. The narrator is devastated and realizes that Sarah Jane has created a new home elsewhere. Sarah Jane apologizes for hurting the narrator and reveals that she now goes by the name Rosa. Sarah Jane is alive. The movement of my hand becomes feverish as it explores her features, all the nooks and crannies of her face. You should have come home, I whisper. I've said the wrong thing, because her eyes snap open and she moves away from me. I liked living with Dale. There's a stubborn edge to her voice that she's inherited from me. The horse-riding and going out on boats had good life in Italy, the whole outdoor lifestyle. Too much time had passed, life was so much easier. I'm furious. You don't get the right to talk to me like that. I did double shifts, mended bikes, any gutty thing I could get my hands on to make sure you had clothes on your back, a little loose change for pocket money. Everything I did was for you. I stare hard at her in bewilderment. Doesn't she understand? You were my whole life. Then it hits me. Rose is about the right height and build. It was you. You put Sarah Jane's glasses through my door, her socks, your socks, that angel. Why would you torment me like that? You didn't recognize me. Her voice rises slightly. You kept saying that you never forget me, so why didn't you know it was me when I was right in front of your eyes? I kept all the things I left England with in a small box, memories of my past life of Sarah Jane. Her mouth twists. You will never know how badly you hurt me. Every time you put something through the door, it made me mourn for you harder. She makes a derisive noise with the front of her teeth. Taunts me. You didn't mourn me for long. You were too busy making a successful life, businesswoman of the year. Now I see that the photos she cut out of me and stuck on the angel's faces were of me from different stages of my professional life. You have been following my progress for years. You soon had plenty of money, unlike when we lived together. Was I the problem all along? You didn't have money because of me? I hear the anguish in her. Never. We would have got there in the end, me and you. I got my business started with seed money from Dale. Blood money. He wasn't trying to help me. He was giving me a distraction to make me forget you. To stop wanting to find you. That shakes her up. I continue. Dale was a selfish man. Sure, I've no doubt he gave you the high and the good life rolled into one, but he only did that to cover himself. Letting you come home to me meant the truth would come out. The only person that was important to him was himself. I know that now. But I just want to go back to my life in Italy. I feel totally destroyed. I've spent years getting her room ready at home. I kept the flat on in case Sarah Jane came back to the only place she'd known as home. Home? All this time she'd created a new home somewhere else. I'm sorry. Her voice is so small. So tremulous. Putting those things through your door was a wicked thing to do. I didn't mean to hurt you, but... But it's the truth. I'm Rosa now.