When We Pray

Dr. Audrey Ann Moses, a Christian Life Coach, discusses the psychological effects and mechanics of prayer. Prayer has intrinsic and extrinsic dimensions, with intrinsic prayers focusing on internal needs and extrinsic prayers focusing on external needs. Prayer, when done with awareness and moderation, can be beneficial. Doubts about prayer often stem from Satan's whispers, but we must listen to the voice of the Holy Spirit. Prayer is important and can bring positive changes. Prayer should be done with faith, regardless of gender stereotypes. We need both intrinsic and extrinsic relationships with God in our prayers, ensuring our motives are pure. Prayers may be answered based on the appropriateness of the request and our actions. We should pray for all sons and daughters, not just our own, and help those in need. Praying collectively, regardless of gender, is powerful. Hello, my name is Dr. Audrey Ann Moses. I am a Christian Life Coach. My business is Never Say Can't, C-A-I-N-T, Christian Life Coaching Consultant. Today, I want to talk about prayer and I want to talk about the psychological effects of prayer and the mechanics of it. How often do we take time to realize the effect prayer has on not only ourselves, but others and the world? Tell me, what is prayer? I found a secular definition of prayer on the internet. It says that prayer is the practice of connecting to something deeper and more meaningful in life. It is rooted in a sense of spirituality. Prayer has two dimensions, one internal and one external. Those are intrinsic and extrinsic. What does that mean? What it basically means is our intrinsic prayers are prayers designed to bring attention to an internal need for communication with God and God responds to that internal need. And rewards are always intrinsic, meaning that our rewards are giving us a sense of belonging, a sense of peace, a sense of healing, closeness to God, personal. Intrinsic means that it's internal, personal. If we look at our prayers from an extrinsic point of view, then it's external. Prayer is designed to bring attention to a need for something or someone outside of ourselves. So we are praying for individuals, we are praying for our city or our country or we're praying, you know, because we need a house or whatever. But we're praying for something that's extrinsic with outside of ourselves. And our communication to God is intended for public observance, which also means when we are praying like in church out loud or in a gathering, that's considered to be extrinsic or external prayer. And our rewards are also extrinsic, meaning a car or a house or a job or, you know, a relationship, whatever we need that we're asking for outside of things that we need internally. Prayer, when done with the right awareness and intention and in moderation, can be beneficial in a number of ways. So, again, this definition that I found on the Internet also said that prayer should be done in moderation. Now, if we could see hands being raised, how many of you pray in moderation? Meaning that, you know, whenever, not, you know, we know that prayer does not have to be in moderation. And that only people that really don't know the power of prayer would call it moderation, would say, oh, we only have to pray once in a while. Prayer is the channel of communication between our souls and God. However, there are times when we doubt ourselves and our prayers. Why is that? Because we allow Satan to whisper into our ears saying that our prayers are not important. And so then we don't pray. So we have to remember to listen for the voice of the Holy Spirit, train ourselves to hear the voice of the Holy Spirit and recognize when it is not the voice of the Holy Spirit talking to us. Then we know that it's Satan talking, telling us that our prayers are not important. Many of us remember a time in our life when we have said, if it were not for the prayers of my mother, if it were not for the prayers of my father or my grandmother, my grandfather, you know, so we know that prayers are important and we know that prayer changes things. And I'm sure that our children have said the same thing about us, even if they didn't say it to us, they have said to someone that our prayers have helped them in one way or another. How do we feel about our prayers? Parents teach their children to pray because we know it works. We teach them to pray for their families, their schoolwork, their grades, their friends, the bullies, their love interests, pets, whatever. We teach them to pray about everything that is important to them and things that they have questions about. They can always pray to God about it. We also believe that prayer is a substance of things hoped for and that prayer changes things and that an earnest prayer will move mountains. Our major concern is faith. If our faith is strong, then its growth and its tidings brought forth through its development, meaning that the stronger our faith is, the more we are going to see the results of our prayers. A faith that holds on to the very things it asks for without doubt or fear. We need this type of faith in our prayers. What are some of the reasons people think one person's prayer is more or better than another person's prayer? Even when it comes to men and women, some people think that men's prayers are stronger than women's prayers or vice versa. Why would we think that? We know that when we're looking at men and women, that women are nurturers by birth for the most part, and their process of everything they do is based on intuition and feeling, sort of. We feel that women's prayers are all touchy feeling. No, they are not all touchy feeling. And because men are gatherers and protectors and priests of the home, we feel men's prayers have more substance, more facts, more logic. Neither of those statements are fact. Neither one of them are fact. Because men and women can do touchy feely prayers depending on what the situation is. And men and women can do facts and logic substance prayers depending on the situation. So don't let anybody tell you that because you are a man, that you can't be nurturing. And because you're a woman, that you can't be logical. That's ridiculous. And, again, that's Satan telling you that your prayers don't count. So, you know, don't even listen to that. What do we need from our prayers? We need both intrinsic and extrinsic relationship with God when it comes to our prayers. Because we have to be concerned that our prayers are real, that our prayers are righteous, that we are not praying for things that are not godly. You know, we just have to make sure what are our motives when we are praying. Are we earnestly praying for John or Mary or Josephine or whoever because we have their best interest at heart? Or are we trying to be vindictive on the sly? God understands our heart. So be careful when you are praying that your heart is clean and your heart is pure. Do we believe our prayers are only answered based on certain things that we ask for and not answered based on other things that we ask for? That could be true because if we ask for a car when we don't have a job, then what is God supposed to do with that? Now, if we have some money saved up because we did have a job or we, you know, we worked and we have some money saved up and we need a car so we can go look for a job, then God can work with that. If we are looking for a job, but we are praying that God help us get this job, but we are sitting at home watching TV, God can't work with that. So you have to understand what your motives are and what it is that you are doing. God doesn't need our help. God doesn't need our help. However, faith without works is dead. So if you are going to pray for a thing, whether it be something internally, you know, you want to change your attitude. I saw a scene on the internet just yesterday where this guy was saying that his buttons were just blasting and blinking and then somebody pushed his buttons, you know, meaning that somebody did something that made him angry. Well, he was advertising that he wanted somebody to make him angry. So if we do that, you know, God doesn't have time for that. What we have to think about is what are we praying for and why are we praying for it and are we being earnest about our prayer. If you want to pray to God to help me find a pair of shoes to go with this dress so that when I go to my friend's wedding, I look nice, that is a legitimate prayer. But if you are praying to find a pair of shoes so you look better than Jane or so that you look better than John, then that is not a legitimate prayer and God will not respond to that prayer. So we have to just be careful about how we pray and what we pray for and where our heart is, what our motives are. Who are our sons and daughters? You know, we always hear pray for our sons and daughters. But who are they? Now we all, you know, if you have biological children or you have children that you have raised in your home, yes, they are your sons and daughters. And you know what they need, so you're definitely going to pray for them. But what about all the other people in the world? All those other people in the world need prayer also. So pray for the unknown person that's, you know, in need of something. We don't know what they're in need of. A lot of times I see on the Internet where people are asking for prayer for whatever. And a lot of times, you know, I'll pray for them. I don't know them. I don't know what their situation is. I don't know if they're being earnest or not. But my prayer is earnest. So if my prayer is earnest, then God will do whatever God is going to do. But just be aware that all the children in the world belong to us because God put them on this earth for us to take care of. Can I afford to feed three million children? No, I can barely afford to feed three children. But the thing is when we see other children in need, when we see families in need, help them. You know, pray to God and ask God what can you do to help them. It may not mean you may not be able to pay their rent, but you may be able to go through your pantry and pull out a couple bags of food or something and take it to them. God will tell you, you know, what it is that you can do for those people. So, yes, everybody is your family on this earth. What happens when people pray collectively? Now, I do want to separate this between men and women because I have heard, I have been in groups of women praying and I have heard groups of men praying and both bring tears to my eyes. Don't be shy about praying collectively with a group of women or with a group of men. Men, when you are hanging out with your friends, fit it in there somehow, you know, to pray, you know, even if it's just like praying over your food or something, you know, so that you show them you believe that God is the most important thing in your life and that he is there for you at all times. And women, the same thing, you know, and pray for your church, pray for your city, pray for the service people in your town, in your groups, as well as everybody together. What is the psychological effect of prayer? We believe that the results of prayer is God's answer to our prayer, whether the answer is what we wanted or not. It is really difficult for me, and I'm sure every other human, to pray for something and never see the result of the prayer. Sometimes it's because maybe I prayed for something that I didn't need or that wasn't going to be good for me, and sometimes God answered the prayer, but it wasn't in the form that I asked. So I either ignored the answer or never even recognized the answer because it wasn't what I actually wanted. So, you know, we have to, first of all, ask God for exactly what we want. I remember years and years and years ago, a friend of mine was telling a story about a young lady that had been praying and praying and praying for her husband. Every time she went to sleep, she would dream about this one person at their church that was one of the most plain men at her church, but he was a good man. You know, he was one of the deacons, and he was good. And she kept saying, no, that's not him. That can't be him. Well, guess what? It was him. And they were married now, I'm sure, about 60 years they've been married. So God will give you what you need, and it may not be what you asked for, but it definitely is going to be what you need. We tend to believe that if our prayers are not answered favorably, it is because we did not do something right, and that is wrong. Again, it's because God works on his own time in our favor. God is not going to be displeased with us unless we are being dishonest. Then, you know, we have to take the consequences of that. Psychological research study on prayer revealed the following. Because of prayer, thoughts of someone that hurt you might lead you to feel more compassionate and less angry towards them. Prayer changes the way people view the world and the events that happen to them. Prayer helps us to understand how we internalize events around us. Prayer might help people regulate their emotions by promoting cognitive reappraisal, which means changing how we think about an event such that their feelings about it change as well. John 14, 13 through 14 says, and whatever we ask in my name, that I will do. For the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask anything in my name, I will do it. Now, he didn't say he was going to do it that moment. He just said he's going to do it. So trust him. Prayer brings optimum hope and a range of positive feelings. All of these positive emotions come from the inner realization that the life you live has a deeper and broader meaning than what your superficial mind can grasp. On top of that, you will get a sense of security from being connected to a depth in your life. Being connected with God is going to help you to realize that your life is much better than you think it is. What would happen if we didn't pray? And I know you're saying, boy, that's a dumb question, you know, because the world is already horrible and we are praying. Can you imagine what it would be like if we didn't pray? Prayer is heaven's plan for success against sin. Humans are connected to this earth because God made us from the dirt. We are connected to God because he breathed his breath into us to give us life. When we pray, it connects us, the earth, and God with no way for Satan to merge in between us and God. And that's our whole point. Push Satan out so that he cannot interrupt your relationship with Christ. When praying for national or worldwide issues, as well as serious local community, church, or government issues, we should pray the same way that we would pray if we were praying for ourselves or our family. Pray that God will intercede with whatever is going on and make it better. Here where I live in Greenwood, South Carolina, we pray for our children because it's just so much violence going on for us to be in such a small town. It's a lot of violence, and we pray that the Holy Spirit will help these children to realize that the things they are doing are not necessary. And I'm sure we see that everywhere. People in the government are just doing crazy stuff, acting as if they don't know who God is at all. We have to pray for those people, intercede for them. When I pray, there are times when I feel like I don't pray as much as I should. There are times I feel like sometimes I neglect my responsibility to talk to God. So I'm not giving you this talk because I'm the perfect praying person, because I am not. Nobody is. I am giving you this talk because I want you to realize that every single person on this earth, whether they are a child or whether they are a mass murderer, has the same opportunity to pray to God and to ask God to help them to move from one point to the next. We are all privileged to have a God that is willing to listen to us and is willing to be with us. And we have a Savior, Jesus Christ, that is willing to intercede for us on every angle. So please don't neglect yourself the privilege of prayer. Please don't neglect yourself the privilege of having a conversation with God. And prayer doesn't mean that you have to lay prosperity on the floor every time you want to pray. It doesn't mean that you have to be inside a church building. You could be in your house. You could be in your car. You could be on your walk, walking your dog, and you can be praying for whatever you see while you're walking. You know, it's a lot of times we see ourselves doing something and we often say, thank you, Jesus. We don't know why we're saying it, but we're just saying thank you, Jesus. And that's okay. So please pray for something. Keep yourself a log. Get a prayer journal. I have a really good friend, Leticia Perry. She has an awesome prayer journal. Try and find it. I know you can. It's on Amazon. So get it and use it so that you can keep a log of your prayers and then watch God bless you. I thank you for listening to me for these few minutes, and I hope that I have said something that will help you along your day and along your journey with Christ. And just remember, prayer changes things. Father in Heaven, we thank you so much for your grace and your mercy. Father, I thank you for the listeners, for you giving me this privilege to be able to talk to them about how we can talk to you about anything at any time. So, Father, I ask that you be with them, touch their souls and their spirits and their bodies, give them mental and physical and spiritual strength as they go throughout their day. And, Father, I just thank you for this radio station that has given us the opportunity to be able to connect with people we may never meet. And I just pray, God, that as our lives come to an end, that we will all be able to meet you in Heaven on that glorious day. And we thank you, Father, and we praise you for all things. In the name of your Son, Jesus, amen. Again, my name is Dr. Audreyann Moses. I am the owner of Never Say Can't Christian Life Coaching Consulting. You can reach me at www.transitionlifecoach4u. It's the number four, letteru.com. I am on social media, Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn. My email address is neversaycan't, N-E-V-E-R-C-A-I-N-T at yahoo.com. Have a wonderful day and God bless you.