selfish habits

The speaker introduces themselves as the host of the Star Girl Pod podcast and discusses the end of a retrograde period. They then share their experience taking a step class at a Pilates studio and the positive effects it had on their mental and physical well-being. The speaker expresses excitement for upcoming events, including a festival and a vacation, and mentions their love for music and planning outfits for the festival. They also mention their birthday, Christmas, and New Year's as future events. They then transition to the main topic of the episode, which is 10 selfish habits for a good life. The first habit discussed is avoiding answering calls or texts when busy, as it allows for better focus and productivity. What is up, you guys? Welcome back to Star Girl Pod, a podcast where I help you expand your mind, tap into your most authentic self, and heal your internal world in order to manifest a more abundant reality. Hello, everyone. I am your host, Diana. How are we doing today? How are we feeling? How are we looking? I hope that whatever time it is that you're listening to this, morning, day, night, you're doing good, and of course, that you're ready for today's episode. I am so fucking excited to be here today, okay? It's been a very long and profound retrograde, but we're finally out. We're done. We're done with the retrograde. We're done with the weird energy, and I'm ready. I'm literally ready to take on the world and just take all the lessons that I learned during this retrograde and start honestly applying them to my life and feeling just better. But yeah, no, I've definitely, honestly, I think the last day of the retrograde was Tuesday. I'm recording this on Thursday, and yesterday was the first day where I honestly felt very amazing. I took a step class at my Pilates studio. They sometimes add different types of classes, and I saw this on the schedule, and I was like, wait, I've never taken this. I wanna see what it's about. I went in, and let me not lie, that the first 10 minutes of class, I was like, what the fuck did I sign myself up to do? This is truly so hard, and I am about to collapse. But then once I started sweating, once it started just moving, my body got warmed up. It was so fun. It was so fun. I got this second wind of energy, and I was going so hard, and let me just tell you that my serotonin levels were through the roof after that class. It just felt so good to get through a super hard class, and to just like, I don't know, I just felt like I let go of so much energy that was stuck in my body, and I sweated it all out, and I remember even the instructor during the class, she was like, sweat it out, sweat it all out, and I was taking those words in, because I was like, she doesn't even know that I'm carrying around all this fucking pent up energy in my body right now, and her words are healing me, and so I was taking it literally. I was like, yes, take all this energy out, and so after that class, I felt just so good, and just so happy. I was like, oh, I'm so glad I took this class, and so now I'm super looking forward to the next one. They don't have this specific class every week. They have it every other week, so I'm really looking forward to going again in a couple weeks, but yeah, no, honestly, so good, and then today, I feel like, okay, I'm starting to feel like myself again. I'm starting to have hope in my eyes again, and I'm starting to just feel good. I'm honestly really hopeful for this new month that's coming up. We're closing out August here, and I'm just so excited for September. I have a freaking super fun festival lined up for September. I'm also going to one of my closest friends' birthday parties over the weekend, and then next weekend, I'm going out of town to go see a family member, and a lot of fun stuff planned out. We rented out this little house right next to the beach, and so we're gonna just chill and drink some wine and just unwind and reconnect with myself, and I'm just so excited. I'm so fucking excited, and then after that, in a few weeks after that, I have Portola Music Festival, which I am so fucking excited for. I've been looking forward to it all year, okay? Honestly, I will say, yeah. Honestly, that was probably my favorite festival last year that I went to, so I'm honestly really excited to go back. It's only the third year that they've done this festival, and last year, I didn't know anything about it, and I was talking to a guy last year, and he would always just rave about Portola and how he went and how it was so good, and he would always just tell me to go and everything, and I was like, oh, fuck it, and so I ended up going last year only to the second day, and I fucking fell in love with it, and every single year, it's only been three years, but every single lineup that they've dropped, it's been chef's kiss, honestly perfect, and this lineup this year is so perfect. It's right up my alley. There's so many niche DJs that are gonna be playing this festival that I feel like unless you actually know about music, you wouldn't actually be able to fully appreciate the lineup, and I consider myself a very big music lover and enthusiast, and I honestly like everything, and I'm super into a lot of niche artists, DJs, bands, all of that, so this is honestly so up my alley. I know so many of the artist names on the lineup, and I'm just really excited. I'm so fucking excited. I told myself I wouldn't plan my outfits until the month before because the more you think about it, I feel like the more you plan out an outfit months ahead, the more you stress out about it, and at the end of the day, it never comes out how you want it to, so I'm just like, I'm not even gonna stress out about it until the month of it, and then whatever I feel like wearing that month, it'll be, and so now we're finally hitting September, the month of the festival, so now I'm really excited to start planning out the outfits and stuff, and I already honestly have outfits planned in my head. I just need to go and actually buy the stuff. I've been eyeing things and having them in my cart, so I'm really excited to be able to press the fucking buy button now, but yeah, I'm so fucking excited. I'm doing pre-parties for it, and then they dropped a few different after-party lineups, but none of them honestly caught my attention, so we'll see what happens. I'm definitely planning on doing shit after the festival, but probably not gonna do any of the afters that are the shows that were sold by the festival as after-parties. Probably none of those. Probably gonna do some other stuff, but I am doing one pre-party, and I'm so fucking excited. I am just so hyped and so ready to dance and to really live up the rest of my summer, even though summer's literally ending right before the festival, so it's technically a fall festival, but to me, it's gonna be the last thing. That's gonna be what closes out my summer in my eyes, and I'm really excited for that because after that, we're gonna be in full fall vibes, and so I'm excited to just dance my heart away and then get ready for spooky season, and then spooky season. After that, my birthday. After that, Christmas. After that, New Year's, and then where the fuck did this year go? But anyway, let me not go that fucking far and stay in this moment. But yeah, aside from all that and from giving you guys the fucking rundown of my life, I wanna get into today's episode. I want to get right into it because it's a list, okay? I have a long list here of things that I wanna talk about. Well, it's one topic, and then within that topic, I have 10 points that I wanna talk about, so it's gonna be a little bit of a long episode, I think. So let's just get right into it. Today's episode is gonna be about 10 selfish habits that you need to start today to have a good life, okay? And when I say selfish habits, I don't actually mean you're selfish, but when people are so used to you being a people pleaser or you always being there for them, and then you finally start taking back your power and start focusing on your life, you'll look like you're being selfish to people. So that's why I said selfish habits, but they're not actually selfish. They're just literally you taking back your power, refocusing all that energy back to yourself, pouring back into yourself, protecting your energy, and making sure that you're on top of your fucking goals, which is the goal always, obviously. So yeah, with that being said, let's get right into 10 selfish habits that you need to start today to have a good life and live your best life. Okay, so tip number one, or selfish habit number one, avoid answering calls or texts when you're busy. And this one is honestly really important and honestly perfect to get the shit started because a lot of the times we are always on our fucking phone, okay? And we feel like we need to answer everyone's calls and we need to answer everyone's texts like right as they come through. And it's just like, you have a life, you have things to do. And sometimes we're like in the middle of doing something and then because we get the fucking text, we drop whatever we're doing and then we start texting back and then we forget what we were doing. And then without even realizing we already lost 30 minutes of it, 30 minutes of time because we were on our phone. Because let's not fucking kid ourselves, sometimes you go to answer a phone, you go to text someone back and then it's just like a fucking like natural instinct for us nowadays to just go on Instagram, start scrolling on TikTok and then we just literally lose track of time, you know? But when you avoid answering calls and texts when you're actually busy, putting your fucking phone on DND, turning it off or putting it in the other room when you know that you're gonna be busy so that you're not tempted to answer and text calls when you're busy, then it will honestly really help you be dedicated to what you're doing, focus and honestly probably get you further ahead in whatever you're doing and will honestly just help your mind. Because sometimes when we get distracted, we literally just forget what we were doing and then it's just like we lose track, we lose focus and it takes us a minute to get back into things. For me personally, I honestly think I have ADHD and I lose track of things, lose track of whatever I'm doing very easily. If I get distracted, it takes me a minute to get back into the groove of things. And sometimes like it'll take me a day or two. Like I literally forget that bad, that if I don't do it now, it's like I will forget and it sucks so bad but I've learned over time that that's just how my brain operates and in order for me to do what I have to do, then that means I have to have my phone on D&D constantly. All of my friends around me, everyone knows that my phone is always on D&D. Like I'm telling you all the time, my phone is perpetually on D&D. Like you're probably never gonna see my phone not be on D&D. And I'm so sorry, but I just can't. I can't deal with modifications popping up throughout the day. And we're not wired to like receive text messages all the time, honestly. Like think of our ancestors. Do you guys think that they were over there texting each other? Like, no, think about, or not even just like ancestors, not even like, let's not even take it that far back. Even like before cell phones were a thing, like people were not texting each other. They had to go write letters or actually show up to people's homes to say whatever the fuck they had to say. And sometimes it would be a day, sometimes it would be two days and you had to just wait to say what you had to say. And guess what? They were fine and they were able to communicate how they needed to communicate, even if it wasn't at that exact moment by shooting a text. So yeah, okay. That's number one. Number two, don't let people occupy your time or your mind if they don't have a plan for you, okay? So, and this goes for everything, friendships and relationships. And in this scenario, I think a lot about relationships specifically. It's like, if you're talking to a guy, right? And you guys have been texting for like two weeks, a month, and there hasn't been a fucking date set up, girl, what are you doing? What are you doing? Why are you letting him occupy your time, your mind, storage in your fucking phone? Like why? Why? They're not setting up a date. They're not doing anything. Like you don't need to occupy your mind. And same with like friends. Like if we're always just like, if we're always busy, we're friends and we know that we're busy, why aren't we just like setting things up? Yeah, we don't have to text every day, but we can have things set up in the future so that we can see each other, have an actual plan set in place so that we don't have to constantly be texting. And that constant texting is getting in the way of us getting shit done. You know what I mean? So if someone isn't actually being proactive and setting up plans with you and actually they look and they're like not actually putting in effort to see you, it's time to go. It's time to go, maybe not cut them off, but definitely just like stop responding as much as you do. Because it's just like, why are we constantly texting? Why are we constantly like on the phone where we can see each other in person? Like if you want a pen pal, say that, say that. I personally don't need a pen pal. I have a lot of things in my life that I need to be doing and I personally don't have time for a pen pal. So that's gonna be number two. Stop letting people, friends, men, girls, if you date girls, whoever occupy your time or your mind if they're not actually planning to see you or they're actually setting shit in place to see you. Okay, number three, prioritize gym and work time. So this one goes right hand in hand with number one, but definitely prioritizing the gym time and your work time. Okay, prioritizing the gym means you're prioritizing yourself which means you're prioritizing your health which means you're prioritizing your goals that maybe you have goals to get in shape, want to gain muscle, you wanna look a certain way, prioritizing that because if you feel good with how you look, then you'll inevitably just feel good all around. Not in a way of being cocky or anything like that, but if you physically look good, you think you look good, you're going to feel good. You're going to feel good. And so prioritizing that time that you have to yourself to get you closer to feeling good and looking good is key. Like you really need to make sure that that is super present in your life. You need to start prioritizing your gym time and your work time. When you're at work, when you're working on your passion project, when you're working on whatever it is that you're working on whether it be a passion project, whether it be you at actual, like your literal nine to five or whatever work that you do, prioritizing that will get you further ahead in life. Because if you're prioritizing that and you're not texting while you're at work, you're not texting while you're at the gym, you're not texting or calling while you're doing these things, it allows you to be super focused on you and it gets you further ahead in your goals. Like it all goes hand in hand. So, and if you need to put your phone again on D and D while you're at the gym or you're at work or let people know, yo, like from five to six, like I am not gonna answer your call. So honestly, if you want, don't call me between five and six because it's gonna go to fucking voicemail because I will have my phone on D and D. And if you think you're gonna get your feelings hurt because of that, then try not to call me like in those times but just to let you know, if you were to even send me a text message at that time, I'm probably not gonna answer to you until I'm done with that. Maybe even after that, because I still have to drive home, make some food, take a shower, like, you know what I mean? So like by setting that in place or even if you wanna let people know, which you honestly don't have to, okay? You don't have to explain what you're doing or how you're doing it to anyone, but just making sure that you're prioritizing that time. If it means even putting your phone on D and D or letting people know not to fucking interrupt you during that time, it'll get you further in life, okay? It'll get you further in life, it'll get you further closer to your goals and closer to feeling good and looking good, okay? And that's what we all want. We all want to look good because if we look good, we will feel good. We just do, we're humans. I'm so sorry. Anytime I look good, I feel good or I feel good, I look good. It all goes hand in hand, honestly, really and truly. So that's gonna be number three. Okay, number four is dedicating one day per week just for you to reset and recharge. So this means you have one day where you get to do whatever the fuck you want, okay? Whenever you want, whatever, however that looks. For me, usually that day is Sunday. I usually go grocery shopping on Sundays. That is the one non-negotiable for me. I always go grocery shopping on Sundays. I love grocery shopping, so I honestly look forward to it. But after that, after the grocery shopping is done, I do whatever the fuck I want. And sometimes I go grocery shopping earlier in the day. Sometimes I go later in the day. Sometimes I go during, like in the middle of the day. And that just because that day is for me. I get to do whatever I want whenever I want at whatever time I want. So usually whatever time it is, I go grocery shopping on Sundays. And then after that, I do whatever I want, whatever I feel like doing. Maybe that Sunday, I feel like going to the park and just laying there for two hours and reading a book. Or maybe another day, I feel like maybe going to a wine bar and reading for a couple hours. Or maybe I feel like going to the mall and like clothes shopping or window shopping for a little bit. Or maybe I wanna go thrifting. Or maybe I wanna go try out a new coffee shop. Or maybe I don't wanna do any of that and I actually just wanna stay home and watch fucking Netflix, which usually never happens because I am not that type of girl. I have to get the fuck out the house. But if you are like that, then that's gonna be what your Sunday's like. Or that's just gonna be whatever day it is that you're deciding on that day of the week for you to do what it is that you wanna do. Whatever day that is for you, maybe that's what you're gonna do, okay? But it's important to set one day where you are making sure that you're doing what you want for you. And listening to yourself and listening to what your body wants, listening to what you want, listening to whatever it is that you wanna do. A lot of the times, during the week, we're busy working. We're doing things that we honestly don't really wanna do. You know what I mean? We're working, we're doing things that really don't fill our cup as much. So it's really important for us to have one day a week at least to be able to fill our cups up in whatever way that we are feeling that day because it's gonna change. It's gonna change week by week. Maybe this week on the day that's set for you, you decide to go to a coffee shop and you're gonna sit there for a couple hours. But then next week, you feel like actually going out with a friend or you feel like rotting in bed or you feel like trying out a new restaurant or you feel like doing your makeup and that's what you wanna do that day. It all depends and life ebbs and flows how you feel ebbs and flows. And so that's why it's important to just set aside that one day for you to do whatever it is that you want and dedicate it for you, dedicate it for you, dedicate it to filling up your cup and dedicate it to feeling good about yourself, feeling good, looking good and all of that. So yeah, okay. And then number five is invest in yourself when it's worth it and if it really brings you joy. This one is a little bit tricky. Okay, this one's a little bit tricky because we can't go throughout life always buying shit that we don't need just with the excuse of treating ourselves and it's just like, okay, yes, treating yourself is important and yes, feeling good, looking good is important but sometimes we got to be a little bit more disciplined with ourselves, with our money, with our actions, with our decisions, okay? When I say invest in yourself when it's worth it and it really brings you joy, I mean things that you've been eyeing for years, okay? Something that you know that you're actually gonna be able to use over and over again or you know that's actually gonna, you're gonna have some sort of return on your investment. Like let's say you've been eyeing this super beautiful dress from Gucci or whatever the fuck, okay? And it's kind of out of your budget but you know that it's gonna be good quality, you know that it's a timeless piece, you know that you can wear it several times, you know that it's something that you actually would have an occasion to go to because sometimes we wanna buy things that are so cute but it's like, girl, do you really need it? Like are you really gonna go to a ball? Like all of these things that we're just like, well, this would be so cute whenever I go to a cocktail like ball and it's just like, when the fuck are you gonna go to that? Like you know that you're not going to, okay? Or maybe you are but it's not gonna be until like a few years from now or whatever. Like is the ball in the room with us? Like when exactly is that happening? So you need to find, if you're gonna invest in yourself, you need to make sure that whatever it is that you're buying there's gonna be some sort of return on your investment, okay? It's a clothing piece that you're gonna be able to re-wear that's gonna look good on you, that you know is gonna last a long time and that you're gonna feel good every single time that you put it on, okay? And some, maybe it could be a clothing piece or maybe it's some sort of course. You've been wanting to learn how, you've been wanting to be like, you're a super into Pilates and you've been wanting to maybe get certified to be a Pilates trainer. You know what I mean? And of course the certification is a cost money but it's an investment. It's an investment because now you're gonna be able to have this certification and if you decided to actually become a Pilates like instructor at an actual studio you can actually make money from it. So there would be some sort of return on your investment. And when I say Pilates, it's something that actually brings you joy. You've been doing it for a while and like you love it, you feel good, you feel your best, you feel beautiful. Then now you're just like, hold on, maybe it'd be cool for me to actually like be a Pilates instructor, you know? And so those are the types of investments that I say, if it feels good to you, then it's okay to invest in it. And specifically, if you're gonna see some sort of return in that investment, you should definitely go for it. So yeah, and honestly, that isn't very selfish of you. Well, maybe it is selfish of you because maybe for a little bit while you're investing in it, you know, you paid for whatever it is you're gonna have to like pull back a little bit on like buying your partner's stuff or like going out to like dinners with your friends and like all of that stuff. But, and so maybe people will be like, damn, like she doesn't want to go out with us anymore. Like she thinks that she's better than us. It's like, no, I just, I'm investing in myself and I know that I can't be spending all this money right now because I am currently investing on something big that I've always wanted and that I know is gonna make me feel good in the future, period, point blank. So yeah, anyways, number six is plan in advance so you're not overwhelmed. This is very important, okay? For someone like me who honestly prioritizes being alone, I love my alone time. I love doing things alone and I really do protect my peace. It's important for me to plan in advance. It's important for me to plan my hangouts. It's important for me to plan my appointments in advance and everything so that everything is laid out for me and so that I can honestly mentally prepare myself for going out with people. Sometimes I get kind of overwhelmed by being around people a lot so I need to make sure that I have it in my calendar where I am looking at my calendar every day and I know like, okay, this is coming up so I need to be prepared for this. Like if I have a weekend where like I'm seeing friends once a week, twice that week, three times that week, I want to make sure that I know that I'm doing that so that I can mentally be prepared for it, okay? And it's really important because that is also gonna set you up for more success when it comes to handling all of your projects and work and everything and making sure that you're getting things done in a timely manner, getting things done before you go out. If you're gonna go out drinking, if you're gonna go out and you know you're gonna be out till late and stuff, at least you were able to prepare and were able to finish whatever it was that you're working on before going out because tomorrow, the next day, after you go out and have drinks, you know you're not gonna feel the best and the most clear-minded to be able to tackle all of those things that you're supposed to, the things that you are working towards. So scheduling everything out is so fucking important. And yeah, and also honestly, scheduling things out and making sure that you're keeping yourself busy in a way so that like, let's say that you're dating or something, like I'm not gonna be able to go out with you whenever like on a whim. Like you need to give me a time, a place and a date. Like I, you know, cause I have shit scheduled, okay? I have things going on every single weekend. I can't just like pencil you in super last minute. I'm so sorry, but that doesn't work with me. That doesn't work with me. I have boundaries, I have my own life and I have a busy life at that. So, you know, a schedule is crucial to see me and that's just what it is. Okay, and number seven, stop being the go-to friend. And let me just say, this one is very important to me because a lot of my friends know that I am not that one. I am not the go-to friend. I am not the yes woman, the yes man. That's never gonna be me. That's never gonna be me because I am not afraid of saying no. Let me just say something right now and let me make that very clear. I'm not afraid of saying no if it's gonna inconvenience me. If it's gonna inconvenience me, if it's gonna make it so that I'm stressed out, if it's gonna make it so that I have to like stop what I'm doing to be able to accommodate for something that isn't even that important to you, then I'm going to say no, I'm so sorry. I am not the type of person, I'm not the type of friend that you're gonna call up Friday night at like 7 p.m. when you're just like, I feel like going out, let's go out. I'm so sorry, call me boring, call me a grandma, but I'm not the friend that's gonna be like, yeah, fuck it, let's go out. You know why? Because tomorrow morning I have Pilates. Yeah, I have Pilates class and I honestly am prioritizing going, working out, feeling my best, and I really don't feel like going out tonight. If you would have told me even a week in advance, I would have planned to not go to that Pilates class, but now I have, I'm literally in bed. My Pilates outfit is literally on the chair next to me. Like, I'm ready to go. I'm in the zone, girl. I'm so sorry. And I'm not about to mess up my sleep schedule just because you wanted to go out with me super last minute. It doesn't show that you actually care for my time or any of that, you know, or being respectful of my time, respectful of what I have going on with my life. And I'm just not gonna be that girl. I'm so fucking sorry. So don't be the go-to friend, okay? Because if you're the go-to friend, more than likely you are that go-to friend. People look at you as a go-to friend because you don't have any boundaries, okay? Because you don't actually care about what you have going on in your life and you have too much fucking time on your hands. And people know that, and they know that you're gonna be available and say yes to whatever. So don't be the go-to friend. Be the person that, honestly, people know you have boundaries, you have shit to do, and they don't even need to ask you, okay? I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I know that this might be, this might rub people the wrong way, but I really and truly feel like in order for you to be successful, have everything that you want to have reach your goals, you need to be dedicated, you need to be disciplined, and you need to have boundaries set in place. And you need to make sure that people know these boundaries, not just because you're saying them to them, but because you're showing them. You're not the type of girl that goes out on a whim on a Friday night or a Thursday night or a Sunday night. You're not that girl. You're not that girl. You're locked in, okay? So I honestly think that number seven is probably my favorite because you can ask any of my friends. They know I'm not the yes girl. I'm not the yes man. I'm not the go-to, and I'm not sorry. I'm not sorry. So with that being said, number eight, embrace softer and slower living. This one is one that I've honestly been really trying to tap into, especially this year, is really taking my time with things. I am someone who used to rush through everything, rush to do everything and anything. Anything I had to do, that shit was rushed, okay? If I was driving, I was rushing, and hence why I've been in so many fucking accidents in my life. Kind of embarrassing, but I've learned my lesson. I've learned my lesson, you guys. I've slowed down. I've slowed down. And I think that because I've been in so many accidents, that's really what really just made me want to slow down with my life because I'm just like, I can't keep rushing through everything and anything. It's not giving, it's not safe, and it's making me stress out for no fucking reason. No fucking reason. There is no reason. Where do I have to be? If you need to be somewhere, then give yourself time. Give yourself time, because the only reason why you're rushing so much is because you're not giving yourself time. It's because you don't know how to manage your time, okay? So being able to take your life slower and softer means that at the core, that you know how to manage your time, really and truly. That's what it comes down to. So learning how to manage your time is crucial, and being on time is important. This year, especially, I've been trying to be more on time with everything, and I honestly find it to be annoying when people are late to things. It's annoying. Once you start learning how to manage your time, you'll see how fucking easy it actually is, and how people who don't know how to manage their time are actually just being fucking stupid. Honestly, lazy. Really lazy. And once you start actually managing your time, and you see how much better life feels, how much softer life feels, you're never going to want to go back, really and truly. Not to mention that whenever you take your time doing things, and you slow down, it allows you to actually enjoy things a little bit better, and be more present in everything you're doing. And life feels so much better, honestly. Life feels easier. It feels softer. It feels lighter. You don't feel as stressed out all the time. You don't feel like you need to be at 100 places at once. You don't feel like you're running out of time, because a lot of the times we're rushing through things, and it's like internally we feel like we're running out of time because we're rushing, but you're not running out of anything. And the only reason why you feel like this is because you're doing it to yourself. You're the one creating all of this conundrum. You're the one creating all of this fucking chaos in your own mind. Slow down. Take a deep breath. Taking a deep breath, making sure that you're waking up a little bit earlier, giving yourself a little bit more time in the mornings to get ready, to be with yourself, to enjoy every single thing. It's going to really, really, really, really make you feel better about yourself, about life, about everything in general. So love number eight. Number nine, create a reward system for when you complete a hard or annoying task. This one is honestly, I love this one. I honestly really love this one because it gives me an excuse to treat myself. Okay, we're going to treat ourselves. This one gives me an excuse to buy myself a little treat, buy myself a little drink, buy myself whatever it is that I want, go get my nails done, go get a facial, go get my bangs trimmed, go get a fucking hair gloss, a hair treatment. And obviously the bigger the task, the bigger your little treat is going to be. But if let's say it's just like doing laundry, okay, tell yourself, if I finish my laundry, if I do my laundry today, I get to go buy myself a matcha. Or if I clean my room, I get to watch a movie. If I clean my room, I get to watch another episode of Love is Blind or whatever it is that you're watching. Creating these little rewarding treats or creating a reward system for yourself, it's going to incentivize you to actually get shit done and it's going to make it so that you're actually excited to get these things done because at the end of it, you know you're going to get something that is actually going to bring you so much joy and it's going to bring a smile to your face and it's going to make it feel like everything you just did was so much worth it. And if it's something big, like applying to a new job or maybe like you need to, you know, refresh your resume or something that really takes a long time that you know is something that you really need to sit down and be focused for, maybe for that, yeah, you're going to treat yourself a little bit more. Maybe for that, you're going to, after you're done doing that, you're going to get your nails done because that's going to cost a little bit more money than a matcha and it's going to obviously take more time and all of that. So the bigger the task, the more annoying the task is, the bigger your treat can be. Or if you don't want to do that, you can keep them at like matchas, whatever it is that you like, whatever brings you joy, that's going to be your reward system. I find that that's really, really helpful for me, especially because I am someone who, like I said, kind of struggle with ADHD a little bit. And so whenever I can remind myself that after I'm done doing this, if I focus and I laser in and I lock in after I'm done doing this one thing, I know that something super great is waiting for me after I'm done doing whatever the task is. So that kind of helps me a little bit. That might be my child infantile brain, but who cares? Okay, it works. Okay, and number 10, cultivating an exciting social bubble that fits you. This one is honestly a big one. This one is probably the biggest one out of all of them because it's the one that takes the most action and the one that takes the most boundaries and self-discipline and maybe even self-love, honestly. It takes you actually figuring out what it is that you want in your life, what it is that you don't want in your life, what boundaries you want to set up for your life and for your friendships and for whatever relationships you have in your life. And it's one that's really gonna seal the whole deal, okay? And it's gonna make your life feel so much better. This is gonna be the biggest key to this whole thing of having a good life and living your best life. Cultivating an exciting social bubble means finding people that actually work in your life, that actually have the same values as you, that actually like the same things as you, that actually respect your boundaries, respect your time, respect your goals, respect whatever it is that you have going on for you. I find that sometimes in order to be able to cultivate this life or cultivate the social bubble that you want, it takes breaking up with a few friends. It takes cutting some people off because maybe after you've done the work, you're realizing that, maybe these people aren't really the best fit for me. Maybe these people don't really have my best interest in their mind. Maybe these people actually don't care about me as much as I thought they did. And for that reason, I have to cut them out because I'm finding that every time I hang out with them, I actually feel more drained. I actually feel worse. I actually feel like I lost brain cells. I actually feel like I have to perform when I'm in front of them. I don't feel like I can actually be myself. And so maybe it is time to break up with them. Maybe it is time to put a little bit more space. Sometimes, honestly, you don't always have to cut people off but sometimes it put up some boundaries and it doesn't just go for friendships. It can also go with family members. Sometimes you need to put some space in between some family members and you. You see that they don't always have the best things to say. And every time you see them, they kind of bring you down a little bit. And maybe it's time to have a conversation with them or again, set some boundaries or again, create a little bit of space. And there's nothing wrong with creating a little bit of space with people that aren't bringing you joy, that aren't filling up your cup, that aren't helping you get closer to your goals, that aren't motivating, that aren't supportive. It's okay. So I say that this was probably the biggest one because, well, for one, it is, because we need community, we need friends, we need supporters, we need a tribe, we need team, we need community. And in order to have that, we also need to make sure that those people in the community are the right people. And we need to make sure that whenever we're with these people, they're actually helping us get closer to our goals. They're actually helping us get closer to everything that we want, everything that we want. We are, there's always the saying of, we are a reflection of like the three closest people to you, five closest people to you, whatever the thing is about how many people, but essentially you are the people around you. You are a reflection of your three closest friends, five closest friends. So whatever those people, however the personalities of those people, that's honestly who you are. Like you're around them because there's something in you, in them that make it so that you guys gravitate to each other, that you guys work well with each other. And so you wanna make sure that those people, those people that are being reflections of you are actually being accurate representations of you, of who you wanna become, of who you are. And so it's important to take some time to really see how you feel when you're around these people. If it's time to have some conversations, if it's time to set up some boundaries, if it's time to cut some people off, if it's time to get real with yourself, take some time to actually do all these things to be able to have that social level that actually helps you grow, that brings you joy, that brings you peace, that you actually have fun with, and that you can be your best, most authentic self with. That's, I think, at the core of everything. Being able, feeling safe enough to be your real self. That's all I strive to have in my life. I want to be 100% authentic to who I am and feel safe enough to do that and feel accepted for that 100, that raw, that real and raw version of me. That's all I want. So these were 10 selfish habits that you need to start having today to have a good life, to be able to live your best life, and to be able to just live a life that brings you joy, that brings you peace, that brings you love and fulfillment, and all of that. So I hope that you guys learned something today. I hope that you take some of these habits into consideration. Maybe not all of them. Maybe you've already been doing some of them and you learned a few new ones, so you're gonna start applying those, whatever you got out of it today. I hope that it was enjoyable, that you learned something, and that you can apply something to your life. If you liked what you listened, give me a like, rate. There's a little rate button up there. Give me five stars, leave a comment, a nice one. And yeah, follow us on Instagram as well, at stargirl.pod on Instagram. You can also follow me on there. You'll see my name in the bio. You can click on my Instagram, see who I am, and yeah, let's get this shit poppin', okay? 2024 is coming to a close, and I'm really excited. I'm really excited, because I feel like these next few months are gonna be so fucking good for us, for the podcast, and I have a lot of cool ideas coming up. So yeah, with all that being said, you guys, so much love, so much light, and I will talk to you guys next week. Bye.