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David Jiang

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AI Mastering

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Simu's upbringing in a traditional Chinese education family is discussed, highlighting the high expectations and pressure placed on him. The impact of his parents' mindset and the importance of pursuing one's passion are also explored. The complications and misunderstandings in parent-child relationships are touched upon, along with the struggle against external influences and the lack of power in certain life-changing decisions. The importance of open communication and understanding in fostering a deeper sense of love is emphasized. Sure. In lots of contents explained, we can see that Simu is in the setting of growing up in a family that follows typical traditional Chinese education. His family jumps on the backbones of some cultural stereotypes and expectations, such as enrolling their son into Chinese school just because Amy, the daughter of their co-workers, had been put into Chinese school, right? Yeah, I can tell that traditional Chinese education is tough. We can see that Simu grows up in a classic traditional Chinese education family. Some Chinese elders have really high expectations for their kids. I remember he mentioned, okay, so he writes this part in his book, For me, this happened when I was in elementary school in China. My dad got mad at me because I only got 79% on Chinese test. He yelled at me, but the difference is he didn't hit me and didn't use any swear words, which I think means I grew up in a much better environment. Because my parents growing up with the traditional Chinese education, they knew how painful it was to grow up in a harsh and strict situation, so they didn't want to bring that trauma they experienced in their generation to me. How about you? So same here. I'm lucky my parents are not that strict in my grades and some of my decisions, but since everyone might have similar experiences, so sometimes you just might have those words from others, so I can still relate to his feelings. I remember when I was small, my grandma always compared me to one of my relatives' daughter, which is from China, because her level playing piano is more higher than me a lot, then she always only learned from that person's daughter. So I can still relate to his thoughts and his feelings. I can tell why. However, after hearing your experience and your story, I can tell this book that really gave readers a lot of impact. Which part did the book impact you the most? The part that impacted me the most is actually Simu's parents. I think they reviewed having a steady, well-paying job as the only path to a successful life. They narrowly defined success as entering a traditional career field, like being a doctor or scientist. But this is not what children really want. I don't think so. I believe we should try new things, such as Simu Liu tried the acting industry. Even though his parents didn't support him, he became a successful actor in the end. So I think it's not just high-paying, stable profession like doctor and scientist that represents success, but all careers are equal. People can try what they want, learn new things, and do what their passion is without pressure. That is the real success. Wow, what a powerful speech. I know, right? I like how you point out that is the real success. I know I'm smart. What do you think about the story? I would say the task most impactful to me is the message of becoming the master of your own extraordinary and third-person tense. After reading the book of Simu's journey, I can tell how big impact a fortune or a chance can bring into people's life. Because of chance and fortune, Simu found his love doing acting and got into an acting career. But who knows, like a kid growing up in Chinese traditional education family, never get anything related to acting or writing to found his thing while walking around for his job. I can truly understand how life can always get changes, unpredictable and variable. It can be affected by something we already own but also sometimes from our society or surrounding in the future. Oh yeah, that's interesting. I do agree with you. So actually, both of our points do have a resonance. Like not just seeing a kid but also us, there's just something that we can't change and control. Especially a kid, it's hard for them to argue with their parents or else. We can't expect anything in them. But also, like you said, Simu's parents' mindset, stereotypes and traditional culture, also future and fortune. And how about topics? Is there any specific thing brings you this fall? Of course, I think parents should not infer with their children's future career choices. This will only make the children more rebellious. For example, Simu said, What I'm trying to say is, I'm really happy I'm not a doctor. So take that, mom and dad. At that time, Simu's parents were very much against him wanting to become an actor. This didn't stop Simu from becoming an actor in the end, but it made it difficult for him to ask his parents for help. His parents said that they would support Simu in everything. In fact, they still hoped that Simu would have a more stable job, such as an accountant, a doctor, a scientist, etc. This reminded me of my grandma, who once said she will never intervene in my future career choices. But when I told her that I want to be a detective, she said, detective was a dangerous job. When I said I want to be an athlete, she said, athlete would be a lot of pain when they get old. Later, I told her that I want to become a therapist, psychological therapist. She said that this job will involve dealing with many depressed people and would negatively affect me. However, because my parents grew up in a different generation from my grandmother, except from not recommending me to become an athlete, they basically never stopped me from choosing careers. Then that's a good thing, actually. It's just, unfortunately, Simu's situation is kind of different from us, right? So, topics that I think I got differently about is kind of different, but mine is the hard truth about love. It's one of the topics that got me divorced, and I think it's complicated. And the quote that brings me that thought is when Simu raised his voice and yelled out the swear word and said, I don't want it anyway. Oh, I remember that. That's when Simu started acting out, taking back to his parents and refusing to do his homework. Simu's parents yelled at Simu and complained he's a loser because of how they invest everything in him, but Simu wasted time on useless things, spoiled and squandered all those efforts and money. Yes, you're right. To be honest, I feel heartache when I'm reading that part because I can imagine that scene look like and know the way they talk isn't something they really mean to. That incident makes me feel and think about the hard truth about love is. There can be conflict and misunderstanding between parents and children. That's why I said it's complicated. Say, like, not even parents, friends, or another half, or anyone. Like, everyone has a different definition in love and the way to express their love. We used to give love to somebody in the way we think, which is same as Simu's parents. Simu's parents always don't mind to cover all the costs and decide to immigrate with young Simu, get a good place to live, and want his son to have a good care. Oh, yeah, I remember. Once his parents heard someone's daughter are having these knowledge classes, so Simu has been put into Chinese school and piano class immediately. I know that Simu's parents are just keep trying to give the best to their children out of love. However, sometimes it may not be what their children truly need or want, which is sad because if we try to stand in Simu's perspective, he loves his parents. Like, he used seven chapters to explain how his parents go through all the tough time together. Yeah, he did spend a lot of time explaining how his parents grew up in a competitive society and traditional family. Like, Simu knows how hard it is for his parents to come through all of those and still try hard to give him the best in everything always. However, because of the education approach at home, it is hard to avoid getting overwhelmed or diminished by the intensity of love he receives from his parents. It reminds me of quotes I read online before, which say, my mom didn't deserve what she went through, but neither did I. I think kids often hope to get wonderment and admiration from their parents. And also, on another hand, Simu's parents have been living a hard life. They face harsh realities in their upbringing, but they do love Simu and don't want him to go through all that again. From what has molded them into incredibly hard-working individuals, they treat and educate Simu with strict or intensive education. However, I think to everyone, becoming parents for the first time is a completely new experience for most people, so it's understandable. Absolutely, it's understandable despite lacking previous experience. Many parents find their way by relying on their instincts. And the parenthood is a journey of growth for both of children and parents themselves. Instead of feeling hurt by misunderstanding, fostering open communication is beneficial for both sides. I believe by actively listening to how the other person feels and thinks can cultivate a deeper sense of love. Right. So now, let's switch topics. After ending with agreeing on how talking things out can be helpful in a parenthood and child's journey of growth, let's talk about how Simu's explore power and against others. In my opinion, there's mainly two aspects to consider. First, it's Simu's struggle against external pressure and influence. Secondly, it's the impact of others' external power over Simu. Oh yeah, it does make more sense now. Most of the time in his youth, he was still young and couldn't change things much either. He often didn't go along with what others said, but since adults were the ones in charge of most decisions, remember he had to say goodbye to his home country, no dating, and do school transfer, right? In the part Simu received the external influence, it would probably be the part he had no power over the life-changing decision of being brought to Canada from China at the age of 7. As an immigrant, I've come to understand that journey isn't easy. Simu's whole family had to face huge change. However, he had no choice but to come to Canada with his parents. He doesn't have the right to stay and go. He was never included in making this big decision and was taken away from the familiar environment and was helpless pushed into a new and unfamiliar environment. You're right. Simu's parents probably thought moving to Canada was the right choice for their whole family, focusing on jobs and their son's knowledge building in the future. Considering Simu was still young, he will need good education in the long term. It might feel they don't involve their child in making decisions because it's too young for the child to understand or make shape than for stress. As an adult, they know what's better than a child does. However, if making a decision without the child's role, it might overlook the child's feeling, revealing a communication gap within the family in the future incidents. I remember the day they had to leave China. Simu's parents comforted Simu with a white lie. They make a lie about ye ye, which is the meaning of grandpa, would come together with them or meet them at the station. They know it won't happen, but they just say that for comfort. And of course, it didn't happen at the end. They didn't have a chance to meet ye ye for one last time. Remember the first relationship that Simu had? His dad was mad and hit him because he knew the girl who studied in a different school and he saw Simu dating a random girl. At that moment, Simu could do nothing but suffer in silence. After finishing high school, he has more power to make his own choice and is no longer restricted by his parents. He can go to a university that's far away from home and his parents, so he's no longer in his parents' control. After hearing your opinions, there's a question suddenly pop up from my head. I wonder should children force themselves to reach the high standards and expectations from their parents because of how much sacrifice their parents make for them? Well, there's no doubt that Simu's parents loved him deeply. His actions were also driven by the desire of wanting their child's success. In many Asian cultures, parents will invest significant resources both financially and emotionally in their children. Chinese parents will spend an average of $90,000 on their child until the age of 18, plus additional costs of university education. They work hard all their life to make their children become successful people, but the more they pay, the more disappointment they will feel after their kid can't reach their high standard. That's true. Sometimes it's not children didn't try hard. It's often some of the children spend a lot of time in study or review, but in the reality, there's a limit of ability in everyone. Not everyone are good at study school stuff. Some of them got more talent in doing craft or music. It's hard for child to force or push themselves to any impossible expectation from parents. Also, when parents push them much, it will affect children to push them that much or even more over because they will think they are not good enough. But of course, I'm not saying giving stress to yourself or try to push your kid a bit is not good. It's just it should be in appropriate limit. It's like the harsh reaction from Sumu's dad when he received a B grade. For instance, I like the intense pressure and high standard that immigrant parents often place on their children. This approach will restrain Sumu like a cage. So in conclusion, my answer to this question is no, because while parental love and sacrifice are undeniable, the education method used by parents in Chinese culture can sometimes become the handle of their children. You are right. It seems to be the truth. What I think is not just because of how much sacrifice parents think they have made for their child, but also because the education system in Asia countries is often like a realistic competitive society for students. As myself having experience schooling in both Hong Kong and Canada, I can tell the system difference, for example, in choosing the elective subject. In here Canada, generally we just have to hand in the course planning sheet to the school, right? However, in Hong Kong, schools will compare your grades to all the other students in your grade. The higher grades you get will be the higher chance you can enroll in the elective subject you apply to. As long parents had previous experience while watching or monitoring their child, they will naturally feel the tension then gradually put a lot of pressure and expectation on their child. Can't deny there is still a big cultural difference between Asia and Western, right? I agree. When it comes to the cultural difference, Sumo also tells how his family expressed love in a unique way at the beginning of the storybook. Sumo said exchanging I love you was a unique Western custom. And he had long ago come to terms with the fact that his parents expressed their love in a very different way, like by telling him to put on a jacket as if he had eaten yet, or yelling at him when they feel like he wasn't studying enough. What he said, the actual words were not part of our family vocabulary at all. That's right. That actually also happened to me. The actual words are never a part of my family or any of my relatives. To me, my grandma will always ask if I had dinner yet, or how's the weather in Canada when I call her, but expect the actual words. This is a really good example of the cultural difference. Right? Like, as someone from an Asian cultural background, I can deeply relate to expressing love through the word I love you. It's not a common way in my family or any Asian family. I mean, we might say, oh, thank you so much for making me the dinner. Or like, do you need a ride? Or something like, don't come back too late or else we'll be worried. This is more common for us to use grateful or heartfelt words to express our love or appreciation, like showing how thankful we feel in the incident. Also, I think we often like to use words with care, like the person who received those words will often feel cared and valued. We don't often say the actual word I love you, but that doesn't mean we don't love each other. It's just that in our culture, the phrase I love you can feel really difficult and weird to say. The word I love you won't be used in a conversation, but not as usual everywhere. Yeah, we just don't use the actual word in general. It feels kind of awkward and embarrassing to say it out. Yes, you got my point. However, initially, I had assumed that all families in our culture do or think in the same way, until one time I heard a friend of Chinese Canadians say I love you to her mother at the end of their phone call. At first, it felt unfamiliar and even strange to me. However, upon reflection, I recognized the value of expressing your feelings to your family in this way. It's necessary to let people that you love know your feelings, and this is very important. Yeah, I agree. So, let's think back on the book overall. Overall, do you enjoy the book or if you would recommend anybody to have this book? Of course I do. I do enjoy this book a lot. I would recommend that new Chinese Canadian immigrants read this book specifically. I think some part of the book can help them understand Canadian culture, which might make it easier for them to integrate into the life here. He noted that there was a lot to learn about Canada as a country. He mentioned something significant about Canada, like Tim Hortons, pound hockey, a universal healthcare system, and of course, drinking water straight from the tap without having to boil it first. Although, until now, I still won't do that. Like, I mean my home and myself. In both, I still only drink water after boiled. How about you, Jason? Would you drink the tap water? Nah, no way I'm gonna drink tap water. It's probably someone else's bath water. I see, I see. But other than that, from the book, readers will be able to learn what Canada was like while they're containing the problem of racism against Asians. Also, the book will help us to understand more about the thoughts of the previous generation of the immigrants, by thinking deeply about the different world views and mindsets of Simon Panham himself. I love how some of the chapters give me the feeling of going back to childhood and memories. In addition, the writer adds some of the photos related to the passage to support a better explanation to readers. I love and got the deepest impression in chapter 7 while Simu, his parents, and relatives have dinner together, and of course, his grandpa. I got the same idea of new Chinese-Canadian immigrants should read this book because you might get resonate in it. I also will recommend people who like to read personal narratives to read this book, because writers use his realistic personal family background, childhood experience, mentally, and the reality. At the same time, sometimes too real to not hit the funny bone. People who love to think in multi-faith perspectives and thoughts will also like this book because it will stunning in different people's perspectives but also like to reading his thoughts or his mind.

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