everything everywhere

In this episode, the hosts discuss their experiences with mental health. They mention how society has started to bring awareness to mental health and how it is now more accepted to talk about it. They also discuss the different experiences they had growing up in Hispanic households and how mental health was perceived differently. They talk about the importance of expressing emotions and seeking help when needed. They mention coping mechanisms such as journaling, working out, and being in nature. Overall, they emphasize the importance of taking care of one's mental health. Three two one in today's episode we talk about mental health love relationships and friendship Welcome back to everything everywhere. We are your host Brie Alejandro and less and we're going to begin talking about our experiences with mental health So before we start let's take a moment to be proud of ourselves and all of the progress that you have made Especially the progress that nobody else sees because that is worth celebrating for two So with that, how are you guys feeling with just you know, the way life has been in 2023 so as far as mental health, I do feel like it has Kind of stepped away from being a taboo topic I feel like society has kind of brought a light to it and brought awareness, which I'm so glad it's happened in our generation Yeah Totally understand that and I feel you due to the fact that myself, you know, a guy doesn't really show his emotions towards Situations that happen to him. He usually like keeps it up bottled up inside and you know, it's crazy But it's also understandable how nowadays it's all being now brought to the light, you know Everybody brings awareness to it. Everybody understands that people go through the different stuff, you know, it's it's all about that People are Coming together and making it something impactful. Yeah, I think that mental health overall has been something that everyone is kind of dealing with and It's kind of been like a normal to talk about it I think back then it was kind of like, you know A little weird to kind of bring it up and the fact that now, you know Someone's not feeling good or feeling. Okay, they could just be like, hey, I'm you know mentally I'm not Okay, and it kind of is more like, okay. What can we do to help you? I think back then if you said that it was kind of like Mmm, you know kind of deal with it. And now it's more like alright, let's help you. Let's help each other out Which has been such a great light to live in this generation and experience that I think if I Personally if I was born in the time, we're like talking about your feelings your mental health while you're struggling You know in your own mind and not be able to like reach out for help. I think you know, I I don't know. I think Personally, I probably would have been struggling. Yeah, I Think sometimes it can also be viewed as like not real like Oh anxiety is not real or depression Not real like you're just sad. You're just mad, right? Like you're going through a bad day Yeah, like are you or are you going through a bad like month a bad week or even a bad year like yeah I think honestly I'm really glad that like we all understand when it comes to You know that your mind. I think a lot of people are like, oh, you know, just ignore it and especially like being Latina I think like growing up in a household where like Thankfully my household was like, you know, if you're not having a good day talk about it Yeah, but I know other family members like You know didn't grow up like that. I don't know if you guys experienced that I think so Growing up in the Hispanic culture. I do agree with you. Luckily. I have a younger mom. So She's kind of more in touch with her emotions so we were always taught to like, you know speak about your feelings and if you're like you said if you're having a bad day kind of vocalize it Yeah, that's for myself. I'm kind of same a situation as Leslie, you know, like our parents My mom was there But my dad was in a sense like hey You know tough up, you know, like be stronger in yourself like let it let it go Don't let it get to you. So we really didn't pay attention to it So that's why I mentioned the beginning a lot of stuff just kept bottled in You know, I don't want to tell my mom my problems because it's different situations because she's a woman Like I'm a guy so it's not like she's gonna understand what I go through So it's just really a big difference a big difference than other households But you know, I'm glad that both of y'all were able to you know, express yourself and let yourself be You know free of letting those emotions out but in other cases it's kind of different sometimes Yeah, I think I've met a lot of people that are like I can't talk about it at home They just say like oh, you're you're sad go, you know, distract yourself. Go do something go clean Go read a book or something and I walk. Yeah, and you're just like, okay Like yeah, let me go for a walk. I'm all better now, right? Yeah, it helped but honestly, it's it's a battle and especially if you're a student if you work if you know you have a House that you have to maintain or an apartment or you know, just juggle juggling it all I know it's the biggest struggle right now and especially our age where we're kind of still trying to figure it out and Understand what our next step and it could be really mentally draining and that's when people start to fall in depression start to you know not eat as much and it comes with like all these battles that you're just trying to overcome where it all at the end just You get tired mentally physically Emotionally where you're just like, what do I do? Where do I go? Who do I talk to? Mm-hmm I have this theory that I was born with anxiety because I remember being little and feeling nervous and Not knowing what that feeling was like, why am I nervous to be going to school? so I Think now that I'm older one, I'm more understanding into it I've found like coping mechanisms and kind of trying to find things that Distract me I guess To not have to go like the medical route and like take antidepressants or anxiety medicine, which I have been through before and I think both sides I definitely prefer the non-prescription way. So yeah now I get you when I was little Although signs were there, but you just wouldn't notice them. Yeah, you're too young to understand What you go through? How do you feel? But once you start getting older you like hey me shaking my leg all the time What does that mean or like me clicking the pen? Continuously making the noise. What does that mean? So it's just very anxious at a young age It's kind of tough because you really don't understand but then like you mentioned when you go to medical route taking Medicine and prescriptions and stuff like that. It's just I Never did that. I never told my parents. Hey, can I go get checked out for this? Can I go get checked out for that? So I never took that route and I wonder how my life would have been if I did take that route So now when you're older, you're just still battling stuff by yourself But do like the I can't say normal way, but just not the medical way. Yeah Yeah, I think I mean, I think when I first had my experience of like, oh, I'm not okay, I Was able to tell my mom and that's when I you know had my first therapy session Which by the way for me personally, I hated it I thought why am I telling this stranger how I feel my emotions my experiences when like I Can just talk to my parents about this. Yeah, but in reality, I Learned that it helps to tell a stranger how you feel sometimes Because they don't know everything so they're just listening to how you feel and they'll kind of like, you know guide you They give you like the unbiased answer exactly Yeah, and I feel like if you were to tell your parents or your friends or siblings They would be like, well, I experienced that too and kind of put themselves first and With a therapist, they're just kind of like, okay. I hear you. This is what I recommend you now I never experienced the whole having to Take antidepressants and all that and I I personally think that I wouldn't have wanted to take that Just because I've heard so many stories of people being like I got even more depressed on them I couldn't get like stop taking them and all that. So I think I was more scared But I know there's other ways to Kind of help yourself if it's creating a new hobby. Yeah, oh or you know finding, you know Working out Or you know playing with pottery. I don't know I think a lot of people have learned to kind of find something to help them with that But I don't know Have you guys like done anything to kind of help you when you feel like depressed sad or need like some help? So a big thing that I started was journaling a few years ago Just writing whatever I felt and it helped out so much and I think I've always liked writing So it kind of came easy to me, but it was like therapy free therapy as a matter of fact Yeah, so that and also working out plays a big part just like if I'm having a bad day I'm gonna go cry and sweat it out at the gym For me it's always been sports. I've always looked into sports whenever that happens. I just go I Love soccer, so I go kick the ball around go play a soccer game stuff like that I also journal so I know how you feel. I kind of journal and scrapbook at the same time. So whatever Yeah that deeply book that has all my secrets in there now Yes, just it helps you because no one's judging you. No one's hearing you but you're speaking To yourself by writing. So it's just it helps out a lot. I also like Being outside in nature sometimes I live by Dallas, so I just go sit on the grass and look at the skyline at night Especially like right now that the weather is getting better So just sitting there, I don't know drinking something eating something just being there in the presence of yourself And sometimes I just talk to myself when I'm there. So it's just it's just therapeutic What about you Liz I think for me I used to hate working out let me tell you I used to hate it with a passion I I honestly dreaded when it was time to go work out and throughout time I realized that working out has helped my mental health so much that even now if I don't go work out I Feel strange. I feel like okay. I have all these thoughts. I have this energy Where do I put it in? So working out has been such a great you know kind of like Place to go and it has it has been honestly a village for me going there I've made so many friends that you know, we just kind of talk and and Work out at the same time and kind of help each other So I think working out has been a great place for me when it comes to my mental health And especially with depression I think Honestly, a lot of people don't talk about it mental health to be anything it could be anxiety it could be depression It could be a disorder. Yeah, like eating disorder anything and For me, it has helped my depression so much. We're like it does get get you endorphins It does make you a little bit happy to know like you're working and building yourself and you know Creating this better version of yourself physically, but mostly mentally I agree The sleep's also better like when I get workouts, I think oh my gosh those restless nights are the worst So when I'm working out, I sleep like a baby exactly you just like knock out So with mental health it also, you know brings like friendships in and it brings friendships out so I think we you know, we all have like experiences with friendships and especially with life and how Crazy it kind of goes from like doing good to doing bad and like having that time So, I don't know have you guys experienced anything with like your friendship. Do you still talk to your childhood? Friends or you know, you no longer and have like a friend a new friend Never know brief. Um, so I actually do still talk to my childhood best friend. It's just one though we've been friends best friends since kindergarten and Yeah, so now we're kind of hitting our like adult 20s and it's a lot of fun But we did have like that gap where we were in high school We didn't speak but it was because like both of our lives were kind of changing and going different different ways. So I've had a lot of people go in and out of my life for different many different reasons, but I like a pattern that I see a lot is just how busy everybody is and For instance, I I have a lot on my plate like I have my sister to take care of I have a husband I'm trying to graduate and then you have those friends that are like, oh, well, you don't have time for me You don't have time to like you don't you don't have time to to go out anymore, but it's it's not even that it's just that I can't It's a lot And I think true friends would understand that and you kind of realize that through the process of You know Life you realize who actually is there for you and who isn't How's your friendship life going it's crazy it's just a whole bunch of chaos Overall I've had people come out of my life, you know, they're there for a good season and then they leave Yeah, so I see that happening more now that you're older based on the fact that you do more stuff Back then I still talk to my friends from elementary school middle school high school Like we still keep up, you know, but I have one close friend He's been going through a lot of stuff so as myself I try being there for him, like you said just listening to him It's kind of hard and to be in his shoes based on the fact that he goes through a lot I don't really want to disclose it but he he goes through a lot So I'm just trying to be there for him and he's been there for me. It's been since elementary. We sometimes we love this Podcasting taking videos, you know stuff like that. So we hang out and we're like We're not judging but we're like criticizing our work seeing how we can better ourselves and In a sense, that was one of my guy friends. Um, I recently not that long ago like at the beginning of the year I was had a girl not a girlfriend but like a friend. That's a girl. Yeah, you gave me like a real close friend Yeah, you know so That situation changed my life you know, like I mentioned people are here for a season but it's just hard cuz It's somebody that you told everything to yeah everything to so now that you're like She like she flew away. She took everything with her. So you never know like is that safe? You know is everything that you told her secured, you know, like in a box or something So it's kind of hard now with friendships that it's just sometimes they're there and sometimes they're gonna leave. Yeah, I think honestly For me personally, I've Learned the hard way that they are not gonna be there forever And I think it all happened when I graduated high school. Yeah, and I was We like it was like we all graduated the day of graduation bang You realized who your friends were and who weren't like you either like we're still talking to them Or you were kind of like talking over the summer and then it kind of just went dry And I was a cheerleader in high school Let me tell you I was I was well known and I really thought that everyone was my friend I thought these people I'm gonna invite them to my to my wedding I'm gonna invite them to my my kids party like everything and I realized Wait, I don't even talk to these people. I don't even know anything about them other than What we had in high school, mm-hmm, and so it kind of made me sad and I think that's where like Everything kind of went downhill with like my friendships. I Don't even talk to really anyone from high school. Like yeah, I say like hello. Hey, like, how are you doing? Oh my gosh But like I don't I don't have a friendship with them and what's so crazy is like how Alejandro said like they they came for a season and I honestly think like I will forever like Cherish those friendships that I had in high school But they were just for a season in my life and now that I'm in college and I have these new friendships It honestly opens my eyes because I really do feel like My friends in college are gonna be the ones going to my wedding going to my kids party really being there for each other during these big events but personally, I do I do feel like I Also made friends through different events, mm-hmm, and I would have never guessed like Going to like a church event. I made my best friend Like I met her there and we literally like are the she's like my sister I met my my other sister at work like at work at my friends are the best They're like they're they like are my forever friends and I just I don't know I meet people and I and I could tell right Away, they're gonna be here for the rest of my life And I meet other people where I'm like, they're here for a season and that's okay And I'm gonna just cherish the time that I have During that season and not it like hoping not the end will come soon But if it does it does and it's okay, and I wish them. Well, I don't have a bad blood with anyone That's no longer in my life. I still cheer them on but I cheer them on from far away Yeah, like, you know and if they ever decide that they want to come back into my life or I decide that I want to Come back into their life You know, hey, like let's talk about it. I do honestly I do wish that I could talk to my old friends and catch up and be like, hey, like, you know What's going on? Like some of them have kids. I know it's so crazy. Yeah, like some of them are married Like you're like, where am I? You know, I don't have a husband or a man like how you do it I think honestly that that's where I stand with my friendships Like I cherish the time that I have with people and I hate when they leave I hate saying goodbyes I don't know about how y'all feel about saying goodbyes They're the worst but to kind of go back to what you guys were talking about I feel like I'm a really big believer on the people that are in your life are meant to be in your life Yeah, and whether it's temporary or permanently like I kind of have to just accept it if they they leave then okay fine I guess that's I mean, that's how it ends. But so Well, it's the last thing you said like, how do you feel about saying goodbyes like I I cry my eyes out Is this like literally or like like, okay, you know the friendship is just no longer there You're just like, you know what like it is what it is. Like do you try and battle it? You're like, hey, like let's hang out. Let's do this. Are you just kind of like, you know, let it go This sounds bad, but I think it depends on the friend Like if I know this friend is just no longer beneficial to my life. I Will probably tell them like hey, you know things aren't the same and I'm okay with it. I hope you're okay with it Stay in touch. That's really I keep it kind of short and sweet But then you have those friends that do really mean a lot and you're like, okay how did we get to where we are right now, how did this happen and when we did have when me and my best friend had a like break we kind of sat down and talked and just like Okay, I feel like you're doing this you're doing that and then vice versa and then like come up with solutions like, okay Let's do a monthly meetup or something. So you kind of just find ways to keep the people that you want in your life more than others to be honest, I Don't know I I don't like goodbyes I don't know why I got to that point But I always think hey, maybe Some part of my life again. I might end up seeing you, you know, cuz you never know and it's great. It's crazy Yeah, it's crazy. Yeah, it's just crazy. It's a small world Yeah, very small world so you you really can't say goodbye and like there's times where I got gotten out of jobs Schools like when you graduate I don't I've never said goodbye to anybody. It's just like the next day. You just don't show up So that's why I kind of got in a sense of if you leave that's cool, I'm not gonna say goodbye you know, I'm gonna just let it be let it sit let it marinate and just move on because Sometimes it's not meant for you to put so much effort into it Is it kind of like that? I'll be here when you get like I'll be here when you get back or I'll be here When what is that saying? I'll be here when you I'll be here when you get back No, I think it's something like that But you'll just be there chillin like if they want to come around and check up on you You'll be nice enough to be like, hey, what's up, especially because I've always been the person who checks up on people. Yes I don't know if you guys are like that, but like I've always been the one to check up on people So sometimes you're like, hey, I'm gonna just I'm just chill Then you get left on red So that's why I'm here like just sometimes people don't Deserve that, you know, sometimes you just you don't want it to come to you But sometimes it'll be nice of like hey how you're doing like them checking on you, you know So that's kind of like a big sense in that point. I think having closure is a big thing Yeah, you know that I don't know It's something like like I'm in a situation right now where like me and one of my best friends We put like I decided to put a pause in our friendship. Mm-hmm And they constantly are like reaching out which I have totally love and appreciate But I'm just not in a headspace or have time enough to go through that battle of like talking about what happened Yeah, we're talking about our feelings because I'm going through a lot right now. I have school I have personal things happening where I'm just like when am I gonna find time to sit down with them on a phone call? Or in person and talk about what happened and why we're mad or I'm mad at them or they're mad at me or what? You know what should have happened or didn't happen. So I don't know like closure for me right now Like I'm in a place that I'm like not yet, you know, not yet Yeah, almost like ghosting but not ghosting like kind of being like But I do I do understand the closure of like the friends that Just didn't work out. Mm-hmm and it sucks It sucks because you you create these bonds with them that you just like you really are hoping, you know You get to live that life where they come to the barbecues and they they do all the little fun things with your kids And their kids hang out with yours and go to the same school and God knows but I don't know I just I personally with my friendships. I realized some are not gonna go that way. Yeah So you have to accept it sometimes Which I mean right over here She's a married woman. So talk to us about you know, your love relationships and experiences before you met your husband Mm-hmm. Oh before I met my husband that It was it's a while back because we are going on nine years together And we met when We met when we were in high school I was a sophomore he was a junior so we were really young So I'm not gonna lie. I didn't really I mean I had like maybe one to two serious relationships before him But again, I was really young So I don't really know what it's like to be in the dating world as an adult right now in this generation and in this society I've heard it's very different. So But I'm really happy with where I'm at I'm glad that you know We got together when we were young again But we're now evolving into the to the young adult life into our 20s and we're experiencing You know buying house or getting your first apartment and just all that big big people stuff Yeah, so It's it's a lot of work. I'm not gonna lie. But if it's worth it, then you can do it I feel like anybody can do it I'm not saying. Oh everybody's gonna find their love like then and there but I To me it happened when I wasn't looking so And that's good that it happened to you before society started changing Yeah, I feel like it I mean, I don't I haven't been into the world like into that Category myself, but just kind of based off what I see from my friends and stuff The dating world is different and and especially with social media And the the whole like fast culture like nobody really kind of commits anymore everybody's just kind of trying to Just you know, yeah trying to find something but it could be right in front of their face They're just not taking the time to look for it Let's hear from the man in the room because you know, I don't know I feel like a lot of women in this generation are ready. Some of them want to be in a really Yeah, someone I want to let everyone. Okay, I said But I do feel like Sometimes it's the man Sometimes it's the man which like they are allowed to feel like that You know, like if you're not ready and you would just want to have fun go on dates experience people great Yeah, but I'm really I'm really about like tell me right away so that I know You're just here on a date and that's it and not to kind of engage In it and kind of like put my time in it So, I don't know how how has your like love relationships and experiences have been Since you've gone into the dating world You know, it's been a rollercoaster ride for me. Um, I guess that kind of started in middle school That's when you're like, oh, you know middle school you have your little boo and have your first like puppy love At the beginning where you're barely starting off, you know, and I've always I said this before sometimes I've never had somebody older than me my family that told me how to handle situations So when I arrived in middle school and I had my little boo thing and stuff like that it was crazy But you know, we got through it. Sometimes it would be that's when you really felt like the connection But if something happened, you'll be sad like that's the time when you would actually be sad Yeah, but once you move on to high school for me, that's when it all changed You start meeting new people. Everybody already comes with a different mentality of what they want to do Exactly stuff like that and I guess I was stuck to that. I got stuck to that towards the end I was able to find somebody, you know, we bonded together We spent so much time together and stuff like that, you know, so that part of my life It happened already, you know that experience of being with someone for so long yeah, it's it's kind of hard because you you are with them a hundred percent of the time and Maybe I always think about it. Was it too soon? Was it too soon? Were you not mature yet? I have a right person wrong time. I guess it was that I'm guessing it was that I'm thinking it was that yeah Because we haven't had lived anything, you know, you still just coming out of high school, you know You can't go out to clubs. Yeah, you can't meet other people. It's just you and the circle that you're around in, you know The age that you are because you still are in your early 20s. Yeah. Yeah, so I think like Early 20 men, you know go have fun Experience and like learn there are some that are like, I want my wife I want to find you know love but it also depends on like where you are in life So I think that's that's that's kind of what hit me. Yeah, you know, I was young I have never experienced that so from that period of time I didn't get to live it. So like now what am I 22? So now you're like, hey, I'm gonna go out I'm gonna go hang with my friends Exactly, but you know, it would have been I'm not saying it would have been great to have like be saying, you know Her what was it his sophomore year her junior year. They meet and look at them happily ever after Reversed it was my sophomore junior, but yeah, sorry But she also like she also wanted to state a point what is your point About the you know Like it's fun being married. Yes. Um, I was gonna say cuz I feel like I emphasized on. Oh, yeah, it's really hard It's not just hard. It's actually a lot of fun the experiences that we get to Experience together makes it just ten times better And I think being a lot of the times you hear. Oh, the first year is always hard We're about to hit our first year. It honestly was the same but it's not like that for everybody Yeah, so it just kind of depends on you and your partner and who you are as as people But yeah, it's a lot of fun. I'm not gonna lie. You just kind of feel like oh my gosh, it's official It's legally now like it's on paper So oh Yes the ring how could I forget yeah, so that was yeah, it's a lot of fun But to finish off Alejandro like so where are you right now like right now are you just like Having some fun, you know kind of like in between it like you're still trying to like figure it out No, I guess after after I finished that it kind of hit me hard So I've just been chilling with myself, you know I just try to you have to sometimes be alone You have to face that being alone, which I always stress it enough. I've been alone my whole life So, you know being alone again, it's kind of like boom you're like you don't if it hits you You know, you really can't be mad at anything it's out of your control, you know, you can't control other people You just have to sometimes now in society You have to hope that people are being truthful to you that people are lying that people are taking you serious And like you mentioned time that's something you can't get back time is something you can't get back So I guess that's the only thing that kind of haunts sometimes people and like man Like what could I have been doing during that period of time? Mm-hmm, you know instead of what I was doing, but you know, everything's cool, you know, I'm always keeping it respectful You know everybody that you meet isn't always gonna want to talk to you people are actually nice in this world There's actually girls that actually want to be your friend. So, you know, sometimes you can't Let that get to you, you know friendships with girls also make sense because you get the point of view I don't believe in the whole like girls can't be friends. No. Yeah, absolutely a hundred percent Yeah They're completely and you can find something different in them because it helps you learn to see what they go through what not to do Whenever you're trying to talk to a girl, so I've always taken that Yeah, I've hanged out with a lot of girls, but they've taught me so much about how now you're supposed to treat a woman Which I should have known right but it's like little simple things that some of women like and Appreciate, you know, so it's good to know that extra step about how I'm being the best possible way I know You can kind of see the do's and don'ts And that's I mean I've learned from both of y'all like before we started this podcast I've learned from both of y'all because I hang out with both of y'all most of the time in school It's just a learning experience like you I basically write all this down in my head, you know She's saying in the little journal, you're just like hey don't do this don't do that So like I really appreciate that from both of y'all being without y'all even knowing, you know That's the thing. Yeah, I really didn't know but I really helped out a guy out. Oh nice Nice to be the dr. Phil in your life Is there anything else we would like to add let's do you have anything else to add about love and relationship Let me let me start by saying your truth And that's something I've always been like adamant about speak your truth and I will I I don't remember the last time I was in love. I So you have been in love? I have yes, cuz I wasn't you know, I had a little high school sweetheart Yeah, it was it was so great. He was you know, my first love And I really like cherished him and you know, my parents accepted him and you know being a Latina That's like a huge deal. Yeah, like happy accepted by my father and my mother I I truly cherish that time that I had with him, but I also do think I was very immature When I was in that little relationship And that's something I will always say like I was immature and I needed to Learn from that relationship which being now 25 when I was dating him when I was 20 I've learned so much throughout my time of dating and experiencing different people and I realized that yeah I was really young in that relationship and it just it didn't work out, you know, and yeah, and that's okay And that is something I wish that I could go back in time and kind of figure it out and you know, maybe things could have been different but yeah, I've met different people throughout my years and Nothing has sticked, you know I'm I've been single so long and nothing has sticked and I just I think it's because I know what I want and I Know the do's and the don'ts that I I deserve and it took me a long time There was a time in my life where I was on dating apps and you know going on multiple days trying to find the one Yeah, and I realized now like okay. Yeah, like I can be on a dating app and go on a few dates But like if I see a red flag, I'm out what if you don't look for it, like what if you genuinely just close your eyes Yeah, I don't know Everyone says that it's gonna come but like I don't be going out like that So like let it come if I don't go out. I'm gonna be in my room and I'm gonna just you know You're gonna come knocking on your window Or like sometimes I'm like, maybe he'll see my Instagram and you know, oh, yeah, that could that could be a possibility But sometimes I do think that a dating app is necessary because you you get to experience from outside of the circle that you're in You know, I think a lot of people date within their circle because that's all they know yeah, and they're comfortable with yeah, and sometimes I do feel like people settle and like just kind of stay with what they have because They don't think there's someone else out there But I personally know like either I'm gonna find them here or I'm gonna find them somewhere else but like the one the one is somewhere and I I have been on a few days where like it's I like them and they don't like me and sometimes it's the other way around or like I You know, I like them and they you know, yeah But honestly, I think I love when I hear like the great stories of the marriage and coming out of high school or like Hearing a guy like Alejandro say, you know what? Like I'm just kind of chilling. I'm dating, you know, I'm trying to figure it out But I'm also chilling on my own. Yeah, you know and Like, you know, there's girls like me that's like they're looking but like, you know, they're not looking Like if it comes great on the date that I go great But I've met a lot of great guys and that are now friends from these days So like sometimes it just it works and sometimes they don't and like you mentioned those red flags As soon as you see them, you know run. Yeah Like you're just like Yeah, and like I just don't have time and especially just with how busy we are like we realize like You know, we don't have it. So like either I'm out or you're out But like don't waste my time and I've learned that the hard Way about wasting time like just from the start if you if they just are like, you know Why I just I'm here on a date trying to have fun great But don't just like drag it on because you know, you have nothing better to do with your life. Mm-hmm But that's that's the hardest lesson. I learned Like the wasting time and the thing about time is that? People who want to make time for you will make no matter the situation. It could be for five minutes ten minutes Eating the time like if I give you my time like Appreciate at least like buy me a coffee or something. Don't just Waste it. I don't know. That's just I mean, I I do feel like I do feel like my time is coming I do really oh, it's getting close to sensitive Manifesting. I'm like I'm like spider-man sensing some stuff But I don't know I hope that I'll one day get to invite you guys to like, you know Leslie's wedding, right? Look, you have instead of a double date a triple date I mean, hopefully one day I I do think it'll happen Yeah, that that's good though. At least one of us is manifesting it, you know Sometimes I for myself, you know, just gotta let it be and I got a lot of stuff on my plate I don't want to lose focus on you know, you can't lose focus Because of that this is this is not your priority as of right now because as a man for myself You know, I have to be a provider. I have to protect so I know that I have to make a good Lifestyle of myself to at least be able to be there, you know for them But I honestly I I loved the topics that we talked about. I truly yeah, can we do more of these? I love this like hearing like your side hearing like Alejandro side I like how we do have different angles and different perspective. Honestly. Yeah, we have like a marriage I have a man here and then we have a girl that's just trying to figure out life Mm-hmm, but I did want to say thank you so much for listening to our first episode of many Yes, thank you guys for listening to everything everywhere again. We are your host Brie Leslie and Alejandro. Well, we'll talk to you guys next time. Bye