Episode 13_Erin Alexander_v2

The podcast "Trailblazers and Coffee" features Dr. Christina Zaccora and Dr. Abby Brown discussing various topics related to elevating women in leadership. They interview Dr. Erin Alexander, a psychologist from Illinois, who discusses her advocacy work, including implementing diversity-related continuing education requirements for psychologists in Illinois. Erin also talks about her work in private practice, with the Illinois Department of Children and Family Services, and providing consultations and trainings. The conversation touches on allyship, with Erin highlighting the importance of sincerity and consistency in relationships and actions, distinguishing true allyship from performative gestures. The hosts and Erin also share their coffee choices, blazer moods, and engage in a discussion on effective allyship. Erin's ability to observe, actively listen, and speak up when needed is praised by the hosts. They reflect on their experiences working together in advocacy. Welcome to Trailblazers and Coffee, your podcast for elevating women in leadership, with your host, Dr. Christina Zaccora and Dr. Abby Brown. Welcome to Trailblazers and Coffee. My name is Abby Brown, and I have my co-host here, Christina Zaccora, coming at you. Hi. And we're so excited to be here today. Today we are thrilled that Dr. Erin Alexander is here to talk about all of her experiences. She is a psychologist in Illinois and friend of the podcast. She's a dear friend of Christina and myself, and it's an honor to have her here. Erin here in a moment is going to share some of her many, many titles and accolades and things of that nature, but what I'll just say is that we've worked with her for many years in the Illinois Psychological Association, doing a lot of advocacy work together. Basically Erin and I worked side-by-side in adapting the psychologist licensing requirements, basically adding a continuing education requirement that psychologists have to engage in diversity-related continuing education training every two years to renew their licenses, which was a big deal because historically ethics was the only requirement at that time, in addition to some other things and it was a very big deal for us to make that change here in Illinois. So that was an incredible experience for me in living out Erin's pursuit of advocacy work together. Let's welcome you, Erin. Please tell us a little bit about you. Where are you located? And then we'll get into some of our fun podcasty questions. Fantastic. Thank you. I'm very excited to be here and looking forward to this conversation. I am in Chicago, Illinois. So I have a private practice. I do a couple of different things professionally. As you stated, I'm a licensed clinical psychologist and I am in private practice, but my clients are all over the country because I have an inter-jurisdictional telehealth license. So I have primarily folks that I see here in Chicago, but also have folks in other states who really enjoy that work. The other thing that I do that sometimes takes me across the state of Illinois is I'm the chief psychologist and director of the psychology and psychiatry program for the Illinois Department of Children and Family Services. So that's a place where I get to do a lot of advocacy work and policy development and bringing in resources to help serve the children and families who are DCFS involved in Illinois. Really love that work. It's especially important at a time like this when safety nets are kind of evaporating and people need so much. Also, when I have the opportunity to provide consultation and training to group private practices, social leadership and group private practices, and also do trainings for clinicians in private practice, I do those things a couple of times a year. And, you know, other things come along and, you know, I'm flexible. The really cool thing about what we do is that, you know, we have lots of different opportunities to support people with mental health-related things. So I like administration and the clinical work and program development and consultation. So I do a little bit of that everywhere I go. It really is amazing what we can do with our training. And I would say you're an educator and a mentor and the list goes on and on and on. So why don't we move on to some fun podcasty questions? We always start with asking each other, what is in your cup today? So, Dr. Aaron, what's in your cup? In my cup currently is half-cast, half-decaf coffee. Had an early start today. I have to get up very early if I want to work out because I've accepted the fact that if I try to do it later in the day, it may or may not happen. So I was up at five. So about now I start to get a little sleepy. So a little boost of caffeine is helpful to get me through the rest of my day. Yeah, amen to that. I was up with my two-and-a-half-year-old very early. But I had a health care reimbursement committee meeting at 7.30 this morning. Oh, boy, okay. I made it. So for those reasons, I have a venti ice vanilla latte with skim milk. How about you, Christina? Coming in strong, Abby, with the venti. I love it. I love it. Oh, I'm about to run into getting my physical. My blood pressure will be through the roof. Today, I am powered by CorePower Elite Chocolate. I also had a very early morning with an intense workout. So I'm just trying to recover. And any sponsorships from CorePower, we would appreciate. As always, please sponsor us. And moving on, we also want to do a check-in on what is your blazer mood today? Christina, would you get us started? Absolutely. I am wearing a sweater. But my blazer mood is in line with this because it is a hint. It's a little bit chillier today in Chicago. But the last couple of days have been warmer, with the air feeling a little bit warmer. And so I'm in cotton. And I'm embracing a cotton blazer because I'm feeling a little bit lighter. And also, natural fibers are in this season. And I am all about it being warm at some point steadily in this season. How about you, Erin? This is a fun question. I'm not wearing a blazer. But if I thought about a blazer mood, I think the first thing that comes to mind is something red. Always a fun pop of color. I have a personal connection to the color red because of my sorority. This is a big week for my sorority, a big week for me personally, having been in my sorority for 28 years now. It's an anniversary date for me. Thank you. Thank you. So red is one of my favorite colors. And so my mood, my blazer mood is red. I love it. I love it. I, well, actually, I think one of what I was wearing a red blazer at a convention. That's actually, was it the red blazer that was part of the inspiration for this podcast, Christina? It might have been. I think you were in red and I was in hot pink. And that was all over from there. Yeah, I think we said we need to have a podcast about, you know, maybe it was bourbon and blazers. Somehow we made our way to, you know, trail blazers and coffee. And my blazer mood is leather, a leather. I have a black leather blazer that I, because I am short, I had altered. And now that the sleeves are perfect length and I'm going to see a concert tonight. So I feel like I was thinking of wearing my leather jacket. And that's what inspired my leather blazer mood. I like it. I had on a black leather blazer earlier this week. Okay, yeah, all right. I'll let you take this. Coming in strong. Love it, love it, love it, love it. Wearing leather. Okay. So, Erin, based on all the work that you do, I mean, you're a psychologist, you are involved in advocacy, you're a mentor. It's my understanding that you're a part of a women's organization within the American Psychological Association, which perhaps you can talk about. I might have misspoken there. But tell us from a psychological standpoint, what makes somebody an effective ally, in particular to women in leadership? So maybe we'll start there. Yeah, when I think about allyship, I think about a relationship. I think about a meaningful and sincere connection to another person. And so when I think about what makes someone effective, it's someone who's honest and earnest and consistent in their engagement. They walk the walk. They know when to step in and help out. They know when to be a listening ear. They're someone who can make another person feel safe to be vulnerable about the different things that feel hard about what they're trying to do. And I just think, again, at the core of it, it's someone who can establish a solid and consistent relationship with another person. Yeah, absolutely. We were curious, too, how do you kind of ascertain the difference between that and something that's a bit more performative? Because I think that the word allyship is out there a lot. And you mentioned the walking the walk. So could you talk a bit more about those differences? Yes, interesting, because my personality, I mean, I've been this way my whole life, is I like to kind of hang back and observe and take people in and kind of see how they engage and establish relationships with people over time. And I think when I go through that process, I'm able to see is this person consistent in their engagement? Have they been doing this work? And are their actions aligned with the things that they say? And when I see that consistency, that's a good indicator for me. Versus the more performative versions of it might be that a person, you know, they're on fire and they say the right things in a meeting, say the right things in a conversation, and there's no follow up. Or when things get uncomfortable or things get challenging, they kind of fall off, right? So you want the people who are going to stay with you in the fight and have those hard conversations and step in when they're needed, when that support is needed. But the folks who struggle with that, I think, are not necessarily the folks that I see as an ally, because I think there's a breach of trust. If I can't trust that someone's going to step up and have those hard conversations when they're needed, I can't be vulnerable and rely on that person to help me when I need it. That really resonates with me as I think about my observations of you, Erin. And we've been in the same leadership circles for many years now. And there have been a number of experiences where you do seem to actively listen and hold back and observe all the figures and characters and dynamics. And when you choose to chime in and speak up, it's very powerful and meaningful. And, you know, I think you're identifying who is there someone or a group that may need my voice right now. So I just wanted to offer you that observation that I have seen that. And it is an incredible skill. Thank you. Thank you. You know, and I think this conversation is really important to have with the two of you, because I've experienced both of you as allies in the space that we work in together in IPA. And I've watched both of you, you know, kind of stand in the gap and have hard conversations and use your voice, use your leadership position to advocate for other people who may not necessarily be in the same positions that you're in. And you guys are both, you're both consistent with it. And, you know, Christina helped me kind of get over the hump of saying yes to a thing in IPA. I don't know if we want to go into all those details, but one of the reasons I said yes to this potential new role in IPA is because I would be working with Christina and I'd be working with other people that I've, again, I've watched over the years, and I know how they work. And I know they're consistent and they care and, you know, they want to, you know, be a part of a group of people who are driving the kind of change that we need. That is so kind. And I know that this is a podcast, so listeners cannot see how great my face is getting. But, yeah, well, you have to know, and you probably don't know if I'm going to tell you, but, like, you are such an inspiration to so many people but to me because of the example that you have set of exactly what Abby has said, just kind of this calm and collected and very thoughtful way of participating in anything that you do, including sharing an office with me way back when, like, 13 years ago when I was just starting out. A full circle. Yeah. Full circle, full circle. And, you know, everything you do is just so thoughtful, but it does take that kind of constant mindfulness to lead in the way and to identify the allies around us. Mm-hmm. And I think what all of us do can be exhausting. And so it's important to have people around you where you can trust that if you say, hey, I need a break, I don't have the energy to drive this, you know those folks are going to step in and maybe get it over the finish line or step in and help out and support, you know, when you feel like you can't do it. That's huge. And I've definitely felt that with the two of you. And I want to offer that to other people. You know, I think if we want to be advocates for the people that we serve and be advocates for our colleagues, then it takes a whole team of us. And you need the right team of people, you know, who can, you know, collaborate and be consistent. And I think that's huge. And I really appreciate that when I find it. So we've talked about allyship. Now let's move on to coalitions. The thing about coalitions is that you often are bringing together groups with different motives or agendas, differences in individual differences, group differences, power dynamics. So how do you build coalitions? How do you do this? How do you help diverse coalitions stay resilient and kind of keep their eye on the prize and be effective over time? I might start to sound like a broken record, but I think about relationships again. And when I think about coalitions, I think what came up for me as you were asking that question is this notion of respect. Because to your point, you know, sometimes when you're forming coalitions, you might have groups that have kind of at their core a bit of a different and maybe more specific mission. But you're trying to figure out where you can join forces or where there's kind of similarity in goals and desires. But to be able to do that, you have to have a level of respect for the other group, their mission, kind of their vision, things that they find to be important, but figure out where that alignment can be. And then, you know, I think one thing that I see where coalitions kind of fall apart is when there's an imbalance where people want to show up and be a part of a coalition and receive support, but not give support. And so making sure that just as much as we're asking for people to support our mission, that we do our best to support the mission that other people have. Right. Yeah, we see that as psychologists, there's social workers and counselors and other mental health providers that we often have shared objectives and goals around insurance reimbursement and things of that nature. And it can be very easy to stay siloed and not work together. And luckily here in Illinois and, you know, across the country, there are different organizations and forums that bring those groups together. We're particularly interested in the work that you do with women. You are an exceptional leader and female leader, and we elevate and lift women leaders. So that's why we want to dig into this more. Talk to us a little bit about how, you know, many women leaders are expected to build these partnerships, but also kind of navigate bias and exclusion. What are your thoughts or strategies that might help women form strong partnerships without them having to compromise themselves, their authenticity and their well-being? It is very tricky. I think the woman in question has to start with kind of clarity around her own personal value system, her own kind of gold standard, you know, for who she is and her why in the work. You know, I think if we're grounded when we enter into spaces and enter into relationships, we're much less likely to kind of be tossed around by the stress and politics and emotion that can be in those places. And so I think when I'm supporting people around strategic engagement, again, it's about relationships, but also clear, what's your vision? What's your mission? Why are you here? Where are you aligned with the folks that you're trying to establish a relationship with? Who are your allies? Who are your, you know, supports? Who are the people you need to watch out for? Because that's a conversation we have to have. And how do you navigate difficult relationships? I think strategy and mindfulness and being intentional about entering into those spaces is very important. And I think if a person is living in this world and they have an identity that's been marginalized by our society, I think one of the ways that we can kind of take our power is to recognize the unique skills and tools that we have to cultivate to be effective and successful in certain spaces. And so as a woman and as a Black woman, you know, there are things that I've had to deal with, things I've had to navigate that because I had the right love and mentorship and support around me, people helped me turn those things into strengths. And I try to offer that to other women in leadership, you know, just kind of talk about how can you take the way you know this world, the way you've navigated relationships, the way you've navigated challenges, how can you bring that into the professional spaces that you're trying to inhabit? Yeah, that's fantastic. It can be hard when you have to, well, when you're challenged with do I, am I comfortable, even remotely comfortable playing by the rules of this community or this in the setting that don't necessarily align with my values and perhaps deciding what are my non-negotiables. Erin, do you have any stories about how you've either helped somebody realize their strength or you've realized your own in a place or in a group that maybe wasn't so welcoming to your experience? Oh, I do. I have to dig. I know, I'm the one who's coming in with all of the spontaneous. I can think of, I can think of things that I had to navigate early in my career that were really hard, caught me off guard, that were confusing, unexpected, but I had to, you know, mentorship and consultation and just having the right people around me helped me think through and understand what was going on. I can think of a time when I was transitioning out of my postdoc year and looking for employment at a particular institution and had a pretty successful track record there. And as you guys know, you know, once we, there are a lot of spaces that we inhabit and once we have our degree and our license, then now you can be a supervisor or you can be a lead this or, you know, chair of that. And so it was a moment where I was trying to position myself for the next opportunity, which would have been a leadership position. And I had been working all throughout grad school, so I had already been a supervisor and ran a program. And so I thought I had, you know, a CV that justified a certain title and a certain salary. And so I had a conversation with a colleague and prepared myself for this discussion to negotiate. And it was interesting because, and I'll never forget, the two people that I was having this conversation with and discussing my salary and discussing my title were very offended that I had the nerve to expect more than what they were offering. And they were visibly frustrated and they let me know that in the meeting. And it was a really hard professional moment because, you know, I'm, you know, fresh out of grad school, kind of entering into this professional, this kind of a professional moment for the first time. And I felt like I made it, I did something wrong. And I had to kind of go back to my support system and unpack what happened and think about what I did and could I have done things differently or should I have done things differently. But I also had people around me who helped me understand what might have been going on with the other people in the relationship and that there was something about power, there was something about place. And my request was kind of stepping outside of some of the rules of engagement that they had set up, stepped outside of a role that they had expected me to be in because I was moving away from postdoc and to potentially being a colleague of theirs. And so, you know, I in the moment was deflated and felt a little defeated. But, you know, through some of those conversations and just continuing to live and work and become more confident professionally, learn how to navigate some of those conversations. And also, that was a moment where I had to start just being aware of not allowing someone's reaction to me to make me question me, you know, in that moment. And so, yeah, I mean, I think we want to always be conscientious, but someone engaging you in a way that makes you feel like you've done something wrong doesn't necessarily mean that you've done something wrong. And that's why your trusted counsel, the mentors, the people you can consult with, the friends you can talk to, those folks come in handy because I had to run this by them because I was very confused. It was hard. It was hard. And so I take moments like that and try to help empower people to get through those difficult moments and to, you know, navigate a relationship or an interaction with someone who might be actively rejecting or trying to suppress or silence or make you shrink down. But that happened to me really early in my career. Yeah. I was going to say, like, those are the experiences that do help to shape us. But also, getting back to your point about exhaustion, it's exhausting to have to think about what could be coming at you and what is their stuff that you're not necessarily going to be able to overcome or even address in the moment. And then also protecting your peace afterwards, as well as, you know, continuing to, like, nurture that healthy self-esteem. Yeah. Okay. Oh, no, I was just going to say, I joked with a friend once that I was, like, one of her board of directors. Like, I think we all have our own boards of directors and having those people that perhaps if there was a grain of truth to the feedback that you had gotten, although, you know, I'm all about we need to be making as much money as and more, that they're the people that you're going to, you know, take it to heart, that feedback. Yeah. Another thing I took from that, and this happened to me at a few points in time in grad school and early in my career, is I said I would never make another person feel the way they made me feel in that conversation, you know, even if I'm interviewing with someone because I subsequently have had positions where I'm interviewing grad students and interviewing staff for certain positions. Even if I don't necessarily agree with what someone's asking for in a negotiation, there's no need to shame and be visibly angry with someone for asking or trying to negotiate, right? It's just not, it was just unnecessary. It felt bullying because there was a power differential in that relationship. Right. And I think you also miss out on, even if you're unable to meet that person's ask, there's something so brave in that and, you know, coming to the table and asking for what you need and could that have been a very different exchange and one that could have still, you know, empowered you to, you know, continue and grow and perhaps renegotiate it another time? Yeah, if we're going to support women, we really do need to support women, even when they mess up or fail or whatever. Yeah. Right. I was just curious, now I'm going off book here, Erin, you know, now you're at this point and it sounds like, you know, you're going to be entering yet another highly coveted leadership position and you are in many already and you have a lot of wisdom and years of experience. Is there anything that you would say to grad school, Erin, any guidance, any words of encouragement that you maybe wish you had known back then? I would say, you know, trust yourself, trust your gut. If something feels right, pay attention to that. You know, if something doesn't feel right, be curious about that. You won't always be as overwhelmed and stressed out as you are right now. You won't always feel broke. It will get better. I think I would tell grad school, you made the right choice because I was a child who for a long time wanted to be a physician. I don't know why I landed on being a medical doctor, but I'm going to be a doctor. And so the whole, oh, Erin's going to be a doctor and a major in biology, but I minored in psychology and I fell in love with psychology when I was an undergrad and decided that's what I wanted to pursue. And I had people around me question whether or not that was the right course of action. Are you going to be, you know, what does work look like as a psychologist? I kind of didn't know, but, you know, I knew I wanted to figure it out. You know, my very practical father, are you going to be, are you going to like financially, are you going to be okay? Are you going to be able to, I think I'll be okay, dad, you know, but they, they knew what doctor, engineer, lawyer, teacher, they knew what that was like. They didn't know what psychologists looked like. And so I was kind of venturing out on my own. And so I think talking to grad school me would just be a lot of just, just keep going. Just keep going. Keep going. You made the right decision. You're going to be happy. You're going to love what you do. Yeah. Yeah. I love that question. I love it. All right. So it's that just keep on going, trust, a lot of nurturing that's nice for you. Erin, we've talked about exhaustion and we've talked about, you know, working toward allyship and supporting other people and finding our supporters, but how do you personally protect your piece? Because you're involved in so much and I think, I think listeners would love to hear how you do it and maybe they can then take some tips and tricks from that. So I do lots of things to protect my piece. You know, that's one of the things that I learned about myself as I developed professionally. Like what are the things that help me feel grounded? What brings me back down when I've been feeling stressed and overwhelmed? Because that happens, you know, it happens, you know, when we say yes to a lot of things, we do our best to try to pace things out and be organized and not have it all collide. But sometimes it still collides and you have it all you have to deal with, you know, and I have multiple jobs. There's some days where I do something related to each one of my jobs and that can feel like a lot. But, you know, one of the things that I do for myself is that I'm really intentional about before I say yes to something, I look at my calendar. I look at what's supposed to be happening before and after that thing I'm being asked to do. Like I knew today would be a good day for me to do this because my Fridays tend to be lighter with meetings and I don't have a lot going on this weekend. And so this date was a good date and we talked about this months ago, but that's something that I'm really intentional about checking my calendar. Another way that I protect my piece is exercise. It sometimes is a struggle to get up early in the morning, but I love it when I can get up and go work out. And then I'm done with my workout by like 7, you know, maybe 7, 15, sometimes 8 o'clock and it's still really early. And I, you know, I'm driving around Chicago when people are still at home and it's quiet or, you know, I get home and I can start doing emails without a bunch of phone calls and interruptions. And so finding those like quiet pockets for myself is, that recharges me. So I make sure that I do that. Make sure I have fun with my friends and my family. I'm really intentional about finding time with them to just unplug and disconnect from my work and letting my no be a no and being okay and comfortable with that. Yeah, I think those are my main things. Perfect. Yeah, I agree. I think, you know, we asked you in November to be on this podcast and you said, yes, late spring, maybe April, May. And here we are. It is almost mid-April. So and I really and we really appreciated the honesty and openness about that. So I feel like we've gone through a lot of questions. You know, many therapists, when we do an intake with a client, we'll ask our clients, you know, after we've asked them a million questions. Is there anything today that you'd like to share with me that I didn't ask that you feel might be important for us to know in the spirit of us being therapists? We'd like to ask you the same thing, Erin. Anything just about you, any tidbits, words of wisdom that you might share to our listeners that we haven't asked you about yet? I think things that I would like to say and for us to say to women who are in leadership positions, it's important for you to be there. Your voice matters. Your lived experience matters. Developing, again, having the right allies and the right coalitions and support system is extremely important. And I do this just informally with colleagues. I've been a part of consultation groups, you know, supporting training and development that, you know, when women are in leadership, there are some unique challenges that we might face. And it's just really important to make sure you have a support system around you. So, like, getting the right people around you to help you stay the course, I think, is extremely important. Yes. Thank you so much for that. And this is really just an honor and another full circle moment. I just have enjoyed working with you so much over these years. And it seems as though we will be working together again in other ways here soon. Fantastic. Thank you so much. You're welcome. I enjoyed it. You guys have a great day. Thank you. Thank you, too. Bye. Christina, wow. Oh, my goodness. So, let's do some trailblazers and coffee debrief. Yes. Yes, we have been remiss in doing a debrief, which is very anti-psychology of us. Like, everybody, when they go through an experience, needs to debrief it, right? And so, we're going to get better at this. I really adore Erin, and I've been, you know, directly affected by her leadership. And I will even say, you know, she is someone that challenges you in such a, just a kind of a beautiful, delicate, powerful way. It's just this combination that I really haven't seen a lot in leaders. And it's inspirational and kind of like a lot of the other people we've interviewed, I think she also holds people's feet to the fire, you know, and believes in you and has expectations that, you know, we need to work. Absolutely. She has always been that person who challenges in a nurturing way. And I really feel like her grounding philosophy is, you know, everybody here, no matter what environment she is, like what room she's in, everybody here can do better. But let's figure out a way to do better. And that's kind of like how she leads. And it is very powerful and moving. And it can also be incredibly intimidating. And I think that, you know, people misread that all the time. Yeah. So, I'm so glad that we had her. I'm excited to, I'm excited to hear what's next for her. It sounds like there's some budding leadership opportunities ahead. So, we'll make sure to report back on that soon. For sure. Thank you so much for listening today. And we will see you all next month. Yeah. Thank you. Bye. Hey, listeners, it's Christina coming at you with your Coffee Break for the Brain. I want to talk about a phenomenon I've noticed recently that I call generalized anger disorder. I'm going to use myself as an example here. So, I've noticed lately that I'm quicker to anger. I'm having all these interactions that seem pretty hot. Other people are coming at me. I'm quick on the trigger for anger. And that I'm having conversations with myself, disputing what this person said or what that person meant. Or even talking through that catchy email gotcha that I'm going to fire back when I get a moment. Now, I never make the moment because I don't want to spend my time that way. But I find that I'm just sinking in anger a lot more. I'm coming in hot all the time and having these heated conversations with my husband about this stuff. And he is actually, admittedly, a natural hot-headed person himself. So, he recognizes these signs. If he's telling me to calm down, I know that I need to listen to him. But like I said, others are coming at me. Of course, I'm going to respond in kind, right? Well, the thing is, I know better. And after a few minutes or hours, I am able to slow my heart rate, cool off, respond with empathy if I need to respond, or just kind of let go of the interaction that I found so conflicted. But not everyone has put in the time and effort that it takes to counter others' irateness with the kind of patience that I'm having to employ. Because it takes a lot of effort. And pretty much everyone is on their last nerve at this point. It helps me to consider my reactions with a label. This should come as no surprise because I am a psychologist after all. We love labels. They help to give a problem an identity. And when used appropriately, they can help us put distance between ourselves and our identities. And that problem part of ourselves that gets labeled, we can kind of set it to the side. For example, you know, that's the angry part of me. I don't need to give that energy or time or space. Generalized anger disorder is a term I have coined, kind of sort of like a generalized anxiety disorder, which I treat a lot of. But generalized anger disorder, which I shorten to GANGSTED, which is, I will admit, ridiculous, but that's what makes it great. GANGSTED is unrelated to generalized anxiety disorder in any kind of way. It's not a real diagnosis, but it steals a name. Anyway, generalized anxiety disorder is an actual DSM diagnosis that means that someone has anxiety over just about anything. To illustrate that kind of anxiety, we call it free-floating anxiety. A person has a lot of anxiety just floating around their brain and their body, waiting to land on whatever anxiety-producing thing comes into view. Grocery bill a little high this week. Boom, money anxiety. Heart palpitations after climbing some stairs. Ta-da! Health anxiety. Notice your partner looking at another cute person walking by. Relationship anxiety. People with generalized anxiety disorder have a lot of anxiety because their general anxious feelings just cling to whatever issue presents itself to them. This can, of course, spiral into longer-term anxiety over a specific issue, but once that issue is solved or managed, something else will come along to be anxious about. And here's where we can help. And here's where we come to my gangsta generalized anger disorder. I noticed that I'm sitting at a general feeling of discontent, malcontent, or, you know, for whoever or whatever crosses my path. They get the rage or that issue gets the rage. Obviously, this is not a great way to live or to be in a relationship with others or to conduct oneself professionally or just to be in the presence of other people. If gangsta is a real problem, it needs to be dealt with. But how? So I've come up with a few suggestions if you're also noticing this pattern around you or even within you. First, maybe take up meditating in any way that you find tolerable. Breathe deeply and pay attention to your breath. Notice the nature around you. Go for long walks. Take a break from your phone, computer, or other people. Maybe exercise, cook, and eat well. Protect your peace via cutting down on commitments or creating solid boundaries for your yeses. Take a nap, take a vacation, talk openly and honestly with a friend. Stop responding right away to emails or texts and give yourself a minute or many minutes to calm down. Truthfully, it comes down to noticing what's going on, admitting that your anger is a problem, and giving yourself a break between action and reaction. That's the space where you get to change, where you get to practice empathy, patience with yourself, or just a general understanding that life can be pretty complicated and difficult right now. Give it a whirl, cope, and we'll see you back here next month. For more information on today's guest, check out the show notes for this episode. Thanks for joining us.