Session 6 - Sam

Wyatt has muted his microphone, causing confusion for the listeners. The group discusses their inability to hear Wyatt and the need for sponsorship from G Fuel. Discord crashes briefly, but they are able to continue. They talk about a vision involving a fire sprite and a strange man who resembled Idaho's father. They discuss the upcoming danger and the role of the Druid. They question the safety of Hope and the authenticity of her vision. They debate the nature of a dagger and its connection to the Druid. They experience strange sensations and sparks while high-fiving. They search for a cell and examine a box and soup. They consider Mordred as their guide. Wow, Wyatt has muted his microphone so that none of us know what he's saying. Dear listener, Wyatt muted his microphone so we're all very confused. They're like, man, I'm killing right now. We can't, we can't hear him. We can't, we can't start mentioning G Fuel until they sponsor us. I feel like I lost you guys. I feel like I lost you guys. Can anybody hear me? Well, Christian, when you're reviewing this later, this is the portion where I had Discord crash on me. So just so you know. Almost back. We're going to make it work. Hey, buddy. He keeps our feed. I'm good. No, my computer's just doing its goddamn best. That's what it is. I feel like I feel like it's a combo of tizzy and tussle. Okay, we'll cut that part. Okay. Okay. So are you going to tell us about your vision? Okay. Hold on. What? He just gave it to you? Why did he give it to you? I mean, yeah, that sounds oddly specific. Hold on, hold on, hold on. All right. Here's the first Seraphinus question. Okay. Okay. Great question. Okay. But I just want to clarify. Situation so far. You arrive at a fancy inn, hotel, whatever you call it. Strange man gives you a fire sprite because he wants to help you stay warm. Am I fully understanding your story so far? For no reason. Uh-huh. That's another point. And also, he looked like your dad. This is weird, man. It's not, though. It's fundamentally not. Gosh. If only you guys had had time for a one-on-one before this. Okay. Okay. She wouldn't happen to be in a cage, would she? Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Dammit. You guys... You guys had such cool vision. My only vision was my own fucking corpse. Wait. Got you out of what? Wait, wait, wait, wait. Everybody? Like, like me too? Okay. True. Okay. Well, honestly, that's kind of comforting. Well, I mean, I don't mean it that way. I just honestly thought I was alone in this, so... Well, I thought it was just me. I mean, at least now we're in it together. I don't know. What do you care, anyway? Okay. What do you think? Okay. So not a vampire Dommie Mommie. But still a Dommie Mommie, just not a vampire. Sick. Okay. Check that. Okay. Three days. Because, look, all I've seen is I'm on the ground in the forest with a huge hole in my chest. That's all I know. And I know it happens three days from now. Why don't you ask Murder? He's the one who's so chummy chummy with that fucking druid. We've been in the forest for like three days. Do you have any idea how we're going to get out of the forest? Well, I'm dying for a way out of this forest, so if you find one, let me know. Well, here I'm not dying yet, am I? What the fuck are you guys talking about? No, no, no, Mordred, Mordred, no, no, no, sweetheart. You're fine, okay? Oh, my gosh. So, Idaho, do you have anything to say for yourself? Oh, my gosh. Yeah. I appreciate that, buddy. Well, we asked you what you were talking about. So, I mean, I guess whatever we tell you, we have to accept, right? Whatever you tell us. Okay. Oh. I don't know why you thought we'd be upset about you having a fire sprite that might help us kill a god. Hold the fuck on. Listen, you keep saying this guy is your dad. Was it your dad or not? But he looked exactly like your dad or he looked kind of like your dad? This is really important, okay? Idaho, buddy, I'm going to need you to just focus for a second. Did he look like your father or not? Thank you. I really appreciate that. That makes so much sense. Great question. Pop pop. Pop pop. Is that you, pop pop? The guy who gave you a fire sprite, obviously. No, I had exactly one, and you know it. To be honest, that's the most believable thing you've said all night, that you didn't know how to process something, so I appreciate you being honest. One second. 20. That's a dirty 20 for old Sambo. Uh, Mordred? Did you just change the weather? Can you do that? Well, look, dude, I don't know what druids do, but it's fucking cold all of a sudden. A simple no would have sufficed. Idaho, what are you doing? Why do you look weird? What are you doing with your fingers? Fair enough. That's a good point. But how... We know it insofar as we know it. Oh, yeah. Oh. Look. Look, listen, listen. I don't know why we're here, but I feel like that druid is responsible. Now, Mordred, you... You've always been good to all of us. You tell me that we're safe. I'll go with you. Quick question. Was that supposed to be comforting? Jesus Christ, Mordred. Oh, God. Oh, God. Idaho, listen, here's the thing, is the time druid, he was around when we were kids, right, doing time druid magic, right, when Hope was, what, six years old at the time? Okay, and so, I mean, it really... There's a little bit of a lag here between, like, can we just get back on the same page for a quick second? They're not the same person, bud. I am just shaking my head. I'm like, this is what we've got, Sera, I don't know what to tell you. Hope is not the time druid! Dude! I just asked you if we were safe. You said, uh, beckon, I don't know, and that was it. What, do you want me to promise now that I'm not, like, if he's cool, I'm cool, okay? No! Okay, well, I guess I'll just wait out here and freeze to death. I'm gonna go, Doran's gonna go and crawl into a nearby bush and just be like, see you guys later, have a good night. Please put me down. What, why, what? Since when? Yes, why did I ever take my clothes off? When did that happen? I have no memory of this. The fuck? Really? Okay. Oh my god, me too. Jesus Christ. Okay, Mordred, do you... Before we go in there, I need to ask you something. Did this druid come, or did this dagger come from that druid? Because I don't really want it if it's his. What do you mean it came... Wait, but what is it? Well, I mean, look, I'm never one to turn down a new dagger, I'll keep the dagger, but I'm just like... Alright. It's just a normal dagger? Right, so what, what does it do? Wow. I can tell you from experience, most daggers do not go through armor. Are they, like, fresh this morning, can I have one? Okay. Okay. I want to look around and see if there's any fires near me. Yeah? I'm gonna go to the biggest one and sit down next to it and ignore everyone else. Okay, howls moving castle, come on. We can't have a fire sprite named Calcifer, people will crucify us. Oh, fuck me. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. What was that? Weird. I'll huddle in, I'll huddle in to see what's going on. Great, no problem. Uh-huh. Okay. So... Doran just leans back to standing upright, but doesn't move. Well aware, thank you. What do you mean he sucks? I mean, I know why I think he sucks, but you've always liked him. What is your problem now? If you did that, you would explode. That's my point, if he became any more empathetic, I think he'd explode into a disaster of rainbows and sunshine. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Guys, I feel like, yeah, I feel like we should walk away from this creepy little Beverly. Bye. I like nosy at the least, right? Hmm. You would. I don't suppose there's a bearskin lying around I could wrap myself up in? I don't know if it's bearskin. Idaho, what are you talking about? Wow, that's very straight up of you. That's real house and style, that fucking bear. I high five Idaho with my F hand. Sorry, that's not what I was gonna do before, let's roll that back. I just wanted to see what happened, that was pure metagaming, let me roll that back. Let me roll that back, I never did that. I weakly give Mordred a high five. Limp, very limp. Let me have. Oh, it's about, it's difficult for her to receive the palmed note without knowing it's coming. I see what you're saying. It's gotta be dexterity, somehow. It's gotta be. Can I roll perception, can I roll perception to notice the link? Weak. 11. So, that's a plus one. I mean, Doran, like, so, the thing is, in my mind, Doran spent six years living as a thief in one of the biggest cities on the continent, so he's reading into every wink that there is. But that's just my thoughts. But he is a Dunderhead, and Doran does definitely underestimate his capabilities, I will say that for sure. That actually makes perfect sense, and I love it, yeah, that's perfect. No, I can't believe they haven't hired you yet, frankly. I think it makes perfect sense, because, like, you're feeling it in your hands, so you're perceiving it through your feelings. Yeah. Sorry, I'm trying to edit my... I'm trying to edit my... I'm not trying to click on anything. Don't mind me, just waving my dagger. Well, then, then I... I mean, I definitely high-fived Mordred with my right hand. Wow. It's officially happening, it's canon now. Hmm. Did I see a spark between their hands or anything, if it was fire damage? Is there anything for me to notice here? Guys, your hands just lit up. What was that? Why'd that happen? Are you okay? Are you, like... Hmm. Okay, guys, this is too weird. Somebody high-fived me. Right hand, of course. It's my high-fiving hand. I'm right-handed. Huh. Weird. Oh, quit being ridiculous and high-five me, Sera, come on. Okay, same. Oh, shit, that's a six. Noodle arms, Doran. Shit. Now, we did heal up at our last camp, right? Okay. All right, I'm gonna jerk... It's my right hand. It's the only hand I high-five with. But, yeah, so I'm gonna jerk back and look at my hand and look for damage, and I'm gonna see no damage. Guys, what exactly are these X's? Did we... Mordred, did we talk about this before? Oh, yeah. Do you know what this is? The lady, the lady, you keep saying the... Who is this lady? Too bad Idaho wasn't there. He would have recognized her. But it's all or nothing now. Okay. Where is my cell? Can we have a look around for my cell first, please? Can we make sure my cell's all right? What's in the box? Thank you. Oh, that's a six. Yay! Okay. Okay. What's in that soup? Okay. Okay. Oh, can we have Mordred as, like, trip guide? Can I, like, do a check to have felt this way before? Because I feel like these are de-skilled antics. Have I experienced it before? That's a different question. So can I, like, do a check to ride my trip a little better? Is there any room there? Okay. I'll roll with that. Okay. So that's a 15. Okay. But I'm riding a high. Buddy, buddy, buddy, look, we're all gonna die. Okay. Okay. I'm just gazing at him, head clasped. Dude, everything is here for you to see. No, man, like, that's the thing is, at the end of the day, none of us ever existed. No, man, give me some of that. Do it. And I lay back and push my chest up to tie it up. Okay. Sarah, it's okay. None of us were here to begin with. Okay. Now you're a spider dripping balls. We can just turn into a goat instead. Try some. And I'm gonna smear dirt on Sarah's face. None of us do. I never really know. I don't know. Do it. Done. That's a two. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Fair enough. Okay. Dear sir or madam, That's a very high spider. Okay. I'm gonna say Doran. I'm gonna say at this point, Doran has like a wet rag and he's kind of wiping Serafina's head as she shivers on the ground. Shut up. Yank, you're not very nice either, are you? Oh, shut up. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. That's what he's about. He's just pounding water. Like he's just guzzling water. That's what it's about right now. That's right. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. You bastard. Okay. Okay. Okay.