Jill BIO Episode 1

Jill Korkki's life is shaped by her memories, moments, and milestones. From her childhood in Minnesota to moving to Florida, she overcame bullying and found her core group of friends in high school. Her 40s were filled with challenges and successes, including the death of her father, buying a home, and navigating a pandemic. Jill's story is a testament to perseverance and the trials that everyone faces in life. Our lives begin to take shape and a foundation laid with every memory, moment, and milestone. Little decisions like turning right instead of left, saying hello or goodbye, or even being too shy. Being loved or loathed, cherished or teased, these are the things that come together in the homes that raise us and become the pillars of strength and love that enable us to move forward into our adult lives when more complicated, difficult things may come, as well as the ability to build new lives with our children and build their foundation with more memories, more moments, and more milestones. This week's episode is a two-part focuses on Jill. From her roots in Minnesota to relocating to Florida, where funny enough she thought she was relocating to Disneyland, through her young life friendships, the stalwart support of her parents, and then helping her overcoming bullying and being the quote chunky girl and then the rock girl. It is in high school that Jill finds her core group of people, the people that will usher her into adulthood, through young motherhood, and right into her terrible 40s. In her 40s is where Jill's life experiences take multiple hard and equally wonderful times, with the death of her father, buying her first home, moving during a pandemic, getting promoted, and so much more. Jill's 40s have been a tumultuous and epic journey filled with change and evolution, and events that are known often break people. To learn how her friends and our squad and even Jill and I's relationship with intestinal fortitude pulled her through the last eight years. Jill's story is one of picture-perfect perseverance and proof that every human being has a trial in their life, or as someone once told me, nobody leaves this world unscathed. Listeners, this is part one of Jill Corky, The Younger. Hey Kat! Hey Jill! Today is episode three. For those of you that have followed us on our first two Our Terrible 40s episodes, thank you so much. Thank you for your listenership, your feedback, your input, everything. It's been absolutely fantastic and we sincerely appreciate it. Special shout out to your sister and my mother for being brutally honest, because that's important to us as we continue to learn and get our stride. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Joining this earth in the summer of 1976, Jill Corky is brought alive. Some of the most popular things in 1976 included silly love songs by Wings, Don't Go Breaking My Heart by Elton John, Disco Lady by Jonny Tyler. Other popular artists include Fleetwood Mac, Boston, Thin Lizzy, Rose Royce, Chicago, KC of the Sunshine Band, Stevie Wonder, and Eagles. But in Jill's life, it was all about that 80s country. My dad was a country fan, so it would have been Patsy Cline, Juice Newton, Ronnie Millsap, Hank Williams Jr. Yeah, okay, very cool. The classic country, and it's funny because he hated country music. And now that's what's on my dials, so I kind of came full circle. Sometimes when I'm at home cleaning or I have Alexa play 80s country and it just brings me back to my childhood and what my dad had playing in the background. Jill, can you tell me a few of your most favorite moments and memories and milestones for your childhood? What was life like in Casa Corky? Minnesota, was it Minneapolis or in a town? A suburb of Minneapolis, Apple Valley. I actually was brought home from the hospital to Burnham Wood, but my childhood home was in Apple Valley. There until you were seven or eight years old? Yes, and it was a very quintessential Midwest Norman Rockwell upbringing. My dad worked, my mom stayed home. Come home from school, my mom would bake cookies. Winter would come along, my dad would make a bathing rink in our backyard for us to ice skate, and mom would make hot cocoa in the kitchen from scratch. We did toboggans and sledding the whole nine years. There was a hill that was so steep, it was a residential road and it was called Butte, but it was so steep that they would close it in the winter. The neighborhood would block off the ends of the roads and it would be a full-on block party, and dads would have big wheel races down the driveway. Everybody's driveways were on hills, so the men would be drinking all day. Party was like a full-on party, and the dads would get on our big wheels. Fast food and beer was always in a can. Yeah, exactly, probably the pull top. There was a babysitting group, like the parents with a treasurer or lawnkeeper or whatever, where we'd say, okay, this is so-and-so babysat the Corky girls for three hours, so now Barb Corky owes three hours of babysitting. It didn't necessarily have to be for- It was like carpool, but babysitting. It really wasn't, and it wasn't necessarily, okay, now Barb has to babysit for that person's child. No, we're talking height time for Tupperware parties. Tupperware parties. The area pay was huge. Our mothers went to the market every single day. They still dressed very daintily. They wore pants, but everything was still very frilly. You would get on an airplane. You dressed for the airplane. Yeah, you would dress up to go anywhere almost. When you went to the doctor, you'd wear a dress. Yeah, or you'd go to church. You don't show up in church in jeans or anything. No, it's blasphemous. Long hair and jeans, those are hippies. Yes, absolutely. My sister had the 80s bowl cut, and I had the bad perms. My mother did that crown to me. Oh, my God, I looked like a poodle. We would always dress for Easter. It's that new Easter dress with the lace gloves. Did you get the hat? They had the Easter bonnets, and my poor cousin Eric in his little suit, and me and my sister in our dainty little dresses. It's like my grandma, my mom's mom, my grandma Agnes, even when my daughter was born, dresses needed to come right above the knee. So if a dress hit the knee or below- It was a scandal. It was. If you're ever going to school, and you had to hold your hands down to your side, and your shorts had to go. I was like, this is not fair. I'm short-armed. You lived in Apple Valley, Minnesota until you were about seven or eight years old, and then you thought you were moving to Disneyland, to live in the tree houses where you'd vacation forever. Tell us all about that story. Great memories. My dad was the president of Paloochee Enterprises at the time. When did that come about? Gino's Pizza Rolls. Gino's Pizza. Eventually, they sold to Totino's years- Yes, I actually taste-tested pizza rolls. What a legacy. Yeah, it was pretty cool. He traveled a lot all over, but he always made sure to make the best of what he was home. You're the daddy's girl. Oh, absolutely a daddy's girl. My whole life. Gino decided he was going to relocate corporate offices to Florida. I'm moving to Disney. Sweet, let's do it. We would travel to Florida in the summers for vacation. We'd stay in the tree houses at Disney. Imagine being eight years old, and the only thing you know about Florida is Walt Disney World. Yeah. And you're moving to see Disney every day. Yes, that's what I thought. And then we roll up to this house in the suburbs, and I'm like, well, this is stupid. This is anticlimactic. If somebody just sold me a dream that was not true at all. This was not in kids' book magazine. This was, what do you mean we're living here? Where's Mickey? So I was kind of hornswoggled into that. Yeah, at seven, almost eight, I wasn't impressed. And then my dad's like, well, you can get a kitten. And that was your severance? Okay, you did get a kitten. Did you get a kitten? I did get a kitten. Actually, my neighbor's cat had a litter of kittens, so I got my neighbor's first kitten, Tico. Aw, what does it look like, boy or girl? A girl. She was gray and white. Tico was the rock. And of course, she, knowing me, still couldn't say, I'm like, I want this one. You know, I want the sad, dying, you know, kitty cat. And we did, and she lived a long, healthy life. So tell me what it was like starting. I was born and raised in the same town, and I went to school with the same people my entire life. So tell me what it was like to move and to start in a new elementary school. It was, you know, it's hard to remember back then. It's hard, you know, because I'm old. But, you know, I just remember being nervous because every, yeah, I mean, I just wasn't changing school because my whole family was still in Minnesota. And it just was. Aunts, uncles, grandparents, cousins. Yes, everybody. And it was just culture shock. But, and I know I mentioned her before, I met Leah, who lived in my neighborhood. And she was my first little friend. And we became really good friends. And I adjusted pretty well to the neighborhood. You're a very charismatic person. I would assume that the personality and the outgoing nature you have now has been with you most of your life. It has. In fact, I was looking at my Facebook memory this morning, and there was a post that said, if y'all ever wondered if I was always like this, I was, because one of the things that we did, that my parents did when we moved to Florida, is they bought a boat. So there's a photo of me just being wild and stupid on the boat, you know, when I was like, yep, see, it's, I've always been this way. So. Starting in the fifth grade, you were bullied. And this carried through on into junior high and even high school. But your parents gave you a solid piece of advice that has truly tracked and helped you through your entire life. Up until now, even. Share with me what that is. You, we talked about your neighborhood, we talked about your friends. So let's get into like middle school. Middle school. Middle school, really start trying to figure out who you are and your identity. And, you know, I was always a very chubby kid. So that's really when the bullying started. Yeah, it actually really started in the fifth grade. And it was three specific boys that just really made my life miserable. They were just terrible to me. Were there parents or other people around you, trying to sell you on that crap that boys were mean to you because they liked you? Yes, yes. What a bunch of nonsense. I mean, these three boys were horrible to me, just horrible to me. And, you know, I went to middle school and some of my friends went to a different middle school because of the zoning. But I always was very lucky that I found my friend group. And so in middle school was a very different variety of friend group. I met two friends that, you know, a brother and sister, and they were really good friends of mine. And this is where I met Stephanie. And Stephanie, I don't want to say she was a bad influence because she was a good friend. But this is in my life where I started finding out that naughty stuff is fun. You know, we were smoking cigarettes and type of situation. And middle school was OK. I, again, had a pretty solid friend group. And I remember I got to go one of the big, I don't know if they do it anymore, but one of the big field trips when you're in middle school is going down to the Keys to go to see him. Oh, wow. So that was a lot of fun. I got to do that. And so middle school was, for the most part, uneventful. It was, you know, I was still bullied, of course, but I went to the eighth grade dance and it was pretty good. I tried to be involved and I had my friends. And so they were avoiding you and it was sad, but it didn't derail or deter you. No, it didn't. Yeah, it's fully for my parents. You know, I remember having discussions with my parents about it. And, you know, I don't remember if it was my mom or my dad that said it to me. And it's something I've carried with me. And I've talked to my children. And when somebody's a bully, it's because there's something inside of them that's black. You know, a bully is a bully to somebody because it makes them feel better. It makes them feel that they're more. By trying to make somebody feel less. Yeah. They feel more. Which is so weird to me because I'm the exact opposite. And I know you are too. Yeah. You and I are both, we find a lot of our human worth, not self-worth, but our human worth and our human value in how we build other people up. Yeah. So I just remember them ingraining that into me. So I never let, I mean, it made me sad. And I didn't like being bullied, you know, or whatever. But I was like, because my parents were, you know, so supportive and really talked to me about it. It's like, you know, it's really their problem. You go into high school with some of these same struggles. And the other thing that you have going on is because of the zoning, people you had gone to grade school and junior high with are now at a completely different school. And you're like almost starting over again. Yeah. We were split between like Brantley and like Mary. And that is where Stephanie and I separated. Got it. Because she was zoned for like Mary and I was zoned for like Brantley. Got it. So I still did go to Brantley with some of, you know, my friends. That's a core group of guy friends. I remember. I did. And us girls, those of us preferred to hang out with the non-dramatic, non-judgy. Because yes. Although I've had girlfriends, you know, my whole life, I don't like catty bitches. So that really just cut out half of that. I had a really good core friend of guy friends, you know, that were just really, really good like brother type situation. And so I had them. High school was a bit of a struggle because the bullying got even worse. Yeah. Because you're going to high school, you've got 14 year olds mixed with 17 year olds. But again, I've always been very blessed. Back in that day, we were considered metalheads. That's what we were called. Yes. I remember. Hair and they all wore denim jackets and rock t-shirts. And I was the preppy where you had the button all the way up to the top. And that's funny. That's how Lori was until I met her. Let's talk about Lori because you end up meeting her in high school. You're a rock era. You're going to concerts. Scorpions and Death Leopard. You said you've seen Metallica a few hundred times. Yes. And Guns N' Roses. And you know, I was very much the 80s and 90s hair band. Yeah. If you hear my dog panting in the background, it's just who he is as a fur baby. We're not winning the battle. We're not winning the battle. He wants to be a part of the podcast. He loves his Auntie Jill, probably. This is Auntie Jill's furfew. Yes, he is my furfew. And he was crying at the door. So we had to let him in. Forgive the panting. So in high school, you're going to concerts, which I think is so cool. I think that's something our generation did a lot, too. We really invited music. We went to a lot. I mean, it was $25 to go to a concert. It sure was. It sure was. And back in the day, there used to be this place called Flea World. But so that's where I would go get all my concert shirts because they were, you know, buying them at the venue was just too expensive. So you'd go to. But anyway, I did all of those concerts, Guns N' Roses. And I was very much a metalhead. I had the Doc Martens. And at Flea World, I even went to the Harley store. And I bought this leather jacket. I still have it, like a biker jacket. And one of my proudest moments, and I have a photo of it, is when my daughter was in high school. And she's like, Mom, can I wear your leather jacket? And I've got a picture of her in a Metallica t-shirt with the leather jacket. I'm like, I'm raising this one right. Yes. So we're, you know, Duff McKagan was, or is, so I don't know, the bassist, the bass player for Guns N' Roses. And those who know, know he had bleached blonde hair, but underneath it was black. So I decided to do the opposite. So I dyed the top part of my hair jet black and bleached the bottom part of my hair blonde and went to the Guns N' Roses Use Your Illusions tour. Thank you very much. And you just felt like... I was, yeah, I was there to be seen. And high school is where I met Lori, which was a very big turning point in my life. And she... Lori has been friends for over 30 years. She was the preppy girl. I have a photo of her from back then. It goes on Facebook every year. It pops up on the memory. I'm like, everybody, here it is. And she's like, I hate you. And I was like, I don't care. You can tell me what. So Jill befriends Lori by cussing at her and saying, give me a cigarette. I was like, you got a cigarette? And she's like, yeah, give me a cigarette. Okay, so you're 2016, 2017. You're turning 40. I am. And this is, you know, I was raising my children. I was concentrating on my career, and I wasn't pursuing a relationship. And in this time, in 2013, I ended up with the VMIX, my best buddy from high school. The three musketeers, me, Lori, and him, that the relationship shouldn't have happened. And we broke up. But again, it was for a season. And I was telling my mom the other day, there's a lot of things that came out of that relationship, even though it was really not a good relationship. I was so just ingrained in my kids and work. My mom mentioned it to me then. She will always be grateful for him because he brought me back out of my shell. We started doing things. He was very active. He was a surfer. He was a beach bum. He was, you know, we started, I was living again. And we would go to what kind of falls on weekends. And we would, you know, he'd shake me awake at six in the morning. Let's go hit some waves. Well, by hitting waves, I sat on the beach and watched him surf. So he got out of the work. I did. And he had a son. Well, he still has a son. And they, my kids and his son got along really well. And so a lot of it was functioning. And he really got me back into having fun and living. That concludes this episode of Our Terrible 40s. Join us next week for part two of Jill's life and biography, where we are going to be diving into her terrible 40s. What we can only define as one of the most challenging, while also being one of the most exciting and celebratory times of her life so far to date. And where I think you're going to find parallels to your own life. I can't wait to share it all with you. Join us again next week. Make sure you give the podcast a like, a follow, and please share us with your friends. Feel free to invite people to join the Facebook group, on Patreon and Instagram as well. Ciao.