jolee and mikayla p2

In this podcast episode, the hosts discuss the movies Legally Blonde and Booksmart and how they relate to self-worth, imposter syndrome, and comparison. They highlight the importance of recognizing one's own value and not letting others determine it. They also talk about the negative effects of comparing oneself to others and the need to embrace individuality. The hosts share their own experiences with imposter syndrome and offer advice on overcoming it. Overall, the message is to believe in oneself and embrace personal growth. Hi. Thank you for listening to our podcast. I'm Ikeala, and right next to me I have Jolie. Hi. This is our new series called Life Through a Screen. Essentially, we'll be discussing movie topics and themes of them and how they relate to us in real life. So, starting off first, we have Legally Blonde with Reese Witherspoon, which was in 2021. Essentially, the movie was about an overachieving empress who often transfers to Harvard Law School to win her selfish prick of an expectant. The way we see this movie is she has a hard time really trying to see her self-value because she just thinks it's the easiest thing to get into Harvard Law. It's completely like not self-aware of how hard that is. Everyone around her sees that, but she doesn't. So, the first thing we kind of want to talk about and the question I want to start with asking Ikeala is how do you identify your self-worth or value, especially in environments that can be uncomfortable for you? Oftentimes, like when I step into a space that I feel like I'm super uncomfortable in because it's really because of the different identities with people and I notice that they have similarities that I don't feel like I have. So, with that being said, it's just kind of like I start to think of myself like, am I really worth being in this position? Like, am I worth being in the same room as them? And I would think that I wasn't because I was nothing like them, but the thing about life is that everybody is different, even those who have similar beliefs, similar ideologies, might have similar personality traits. Whatever the case may be, they very much deserve to be in the room and so do you. You just have to recognize that maybe you're a little bit different and it's okay to stand out, maybe even far more than they do. However, how that makes you feel. And yeah, one thing that helps with feeling more comfortable, I think, is talking to them and, you know, having good conversation starters. Also recognizing that, like, with the opportunity being presented to me, it was for a reason. Somebody or maybe even just, like, the universe may have thought like, oh, like, this would be a good opportunity for you. We feel like you can do it, blah, blah, blah. And they just hand it to me. It's just like you have to have the confidence and have to understand that, like, you deserve to be in this room, even if it does make you uncomfortable. And another thing that I like to think of it as is when you're uncomfortable, that means that there's room for growth. There's room to become more comfortable with being in a space, if that makes sense. But yeah, I try to not be very negative because I know that in general, just like with anybody, oftentimes we can talk ourselves out of doing things because we're scared of how we'll be perceived or our work isn't good enough, whatever the case may be. And I would just like to remind myself and those out there who have the same problems, maybe you still haven't accomplished it or overcame it, you deserve to be in those spaces that a lot of people want you to show up in. Even if you have people who feel like you don't deserve to be in that space, someone thought that you deserve to be in that space. So give yourself props, give yourself the credit, give yourself grace, especially if it's a new adjustment. It's okay to not know right off the bat what you're doing in most things. But just recognize that in general, you're worthy of new opportunities. And to be able to walk into a space where you're challenged to elevate yourself. So yeah. Yeah, I totally agree. The way that I kind of think about it is like, if I'm feeling this way, there are definitely other people that are feeling this way. So the easiest way for me to become more comfortable in a space and know that I'm there for a reason is because I know there are definitely many other people in the room that are feeling that way. They're feeling just as awkward or just as nervous as I am to be there. So just like knowing that there are other people feeling the same way and I should just, if I can feel confident in like my bathroom at midnight, you know, I can feel confident wherever else I go. Yeah. So just like, I think like, harnessing that feeling and being able to use it in other spaces and like, acknowledge that feeling in other spaces definitely makes you more comfortable. Yeah. I also think that it's just a state of mind. Mm-hmm. That's really all that it is. And you have the power to decide what you're worthy of and what you're not worthy of. Not anybody else or not even something else that, whatever the case may be, it shouldn't be able to determine who you are and what you're capable of. You should be the one to be able to do that. And that's from just self-recognition as well as self-awareness. Knowing who you are really helps with imposter syndrome. It helps you to defeat it. Oftentimes the way I think of it. So I like to just remind myself as well, that it's just a state of mind that's meant to make me hesitant about walking into certain rooms that I deserve to be in. So yeah, I would just like to say that do not let imposter syndrome kick you down or make you feel like you're, you know, not even just imposter syndrome, but self-worth and your value. Don't let it be determined by others. Be the one to determine that for yourself because this is you at the end of the day and there's only one you. I know that's very clear stated here, but there really is only one you. So wow, the confidence looks like you got over that. So yeah, just realize who you are and realize that you're special and you bring something to the table. Another thing with self-worth and value, don't compare yourself to others. As many people would say, it's a thief of joy, which it is. I've had a hard time with, you know, when it came to looks, when it came to personality, when it came to just a lot of things in general. I would feel like, why is it so hard for me to do this if it's not hard for them to do it? And it's just like, you have to understand that you have a completely different personality. You have, there's like so many factors to who you are. There's so many layers of who you are. You're a complex person. Everybody are complex people in general. You can't just figure everybody out automatically. Like it takes time. So you have to understand that people have different things than you do. Y'all may have similar behaviors or maybe even similar humor, but they're more extroverted and you're more introverted, whatever the case may be. So yeah, just realize that like, comparison really does kill the vibe. It really does bring you down more than it brings the other person down because you're bringing yourself up. Yeah. And one thing I'm like thinking about while we're talking about this is like, you know, it can, it's a lot easier said than done to like, you know, value yourself and see yourself as like just as good as everyone else. But you know, you just have to think about it. And it is, it is a lot easier said than done. But once you get to that point where you can do it, you know, you don't doubt yourself anymore and you feel like completely comfortable in your own skin. That's just like the best feeling. Yeah. And the next film that kind of relates to Legally Blonde, it's not like exactly the same, but there are a lot of similarities when you dig a little deeper between them, is Booksmart from 2019. Essentially two nerdy and awkward best friends send themselves on a mission to have a wild and fun night with their graduating class in high school. And this movie kind of goes deeper into like finding yourself and, you know, it's more than just like surface level because the two girls in the movie were very focused on school, but that kind of led them to not really know a lot about their self and their identity. So they, both the films do have pretty similar like influences and meanings. So one thing kind of with this film is like imposter syndrome, because, you know, they can feel like accomplished with what they're doing in school, but seeing that everyone around them is also doing well in school, but they can also like have their own identities and be like super confident in themselves is something that the two weren't able to really like figure out in school. So something that we also want to talk about is like us, our experiences with imposter syndrome and how we overcame it and how we can overcome the obstacle of that. So Mykala, do you kind of want to talk about that? Yeah, like I mentioned before with imposter syndrome with Legally Blonde, I think it's more prevalent in this movie because they felt like they did belong in spaces of, you know, like a fun environment. And that's just because they were so academically focused to the point where they felt like, okay, well, we're pretty set because we're going to this college. And if I remember correctly, it was on, I think, a full scholarship for them, a full ride. So they felt pretty accomplished just by having that going for themselves. And, you know, they decided like, okay, well, why don't we just take a break and actually have fun for this one night. Both parents mutually agreed and felt like, well, you've worked so hard this semester, why don't you just take a break and go out and enjoy your last night in high school. Only for them to find out that like, like I said, with comparison being the Thief of Joy, they really compared themselves to their high school classmates who were more on the popular side of the school. They were more popular and they were more, I guess, badass. So a lot of people, well, they really just, you know, were kind of like talking down on them. They're like, oh, we have this or that going for ourselves and blah, blah, blah, only to find out that like those same classmates also had those things going for themselves while still having other commitments such as having fun, living life and not just solely focused on their studies. And I think the problem with that was they felt like, well, this can't be and that's part of imposter syndrome. And I think where I'm trying to get at is they felt like not only did they belong in those educational spaces where they could have full rides or, you know, get accepted into colleges, certain colleges, like they felt like they weren't good enough for it. I think they also felt like they weren't good enough for certain things themselves. So they kind of projected that onto them, if that makes sense. Yeah, yeah. And yeah, I've had that kind of experience once again. Covered it a little bit before, but the way that I overcame it was just mindset shifting. What else? Surrounding myself with people who were inclusive and, you know, saw the great in me as well. I also kind of went through like an ego death as well, where I stopped making myself, I don't know how to say it. I feel like one thing about my ego was that it was very, I'm at a loss for words right now. I feel like it was very, you know, driven by the fact that I did better than a lot of people, only to realize that they did just as great as me, maybe even a little bit better and still had the time to commit to having fun and being inclusive. And I think that better and still had the time to commit to having fun and playing sports and stuff like that. So it was kind of like a shock to my ego. It kind of hurt it a little bit as well. I've been through that. But, you know, you can't compare yourself to everybody. You can't make yourself feel like you're not good enough because this one person that you feel like you were better than, they got the same thing or maybe even better. Yeah. So kill some of those toxic habits and you'll be all right. Yeah, I definitely would have to agree with that. Because there were times where, like in school before, like in high school, I would be in like certain activities and certain classes. And, you know, I felt like I was doing the best that I could, which was not the best, for sure. But just seeing that there were other people doing like better than me while also juggling other things at the same time, I think that kind of hit me a little hard. I just didn't know how to take that because then I felt like I should be trying more and I could be doing a lot more even though I felt like I was doing the best I could. And just like, I think overcoming that was just taking a step back and thinking like, you know, people, every person has the way that they do things. So just because someone was doing the same things that I was, but also doing better, like better grades and stuff like that. I think taking a step back and just knowing that people are different really helped me to be more comfortable in the fact that, you know, I, not that I had bad grades, but you know, I just wasn't getting like all straight A's and everything like other people were. Just overcoming that, just taking a step back and looking at it in a different way and a different perspective. And I think like something with this movie too is that they really thought they were like at the top because they weren't popular, but they had like great scholarships to these like very notable schools. But you could be the smartest person ever and have like no personality or no self-identity and like that just, you know, it's hard to gauge your self-worth off of that. So having, you know, having your own sense of self and having like an identity that you're comfortable with in the end is, and to me is more important than, you know, if you're the smartest person ever or you're the richest person ever. If you don't really have any substance behind that, then it just doesn't, you don't, I don't know how to put it, like you just don't seem like, I don't know. Wait, hold on, repeat again? I don't know where I was going with that. Like you could be the richest person in the world, you could be the smartest person, but if you have like no substance behind that or no personality, then like what are you doing? Like I think that kind of, the movie touched on that, not as like in such a dramatic way, but it definitely like made the two characters realize like what are we if we, you know, haven't done everything that the other high schoolers have just because we're like, you know, smart and we're going to good schools. We haven't had the same experiences as other people, so like what does that make us? And they just haven't had the time to like explore themselves and explore their personalities and their identities. Yeah, so I just really feel like both movies were great. They both explored the themes of self-worth, stereotypes, and post-traumatic stress disorder more, but another thing that they did was also take us on a journey of the main characters rebranding themselves. And even though both movies had similar themes and similar takes on their identities, the main characters identities, they also focused on like different paths where like sexuality and, you know, different focuses of life where one is more so about having fun and living, right? The other one was dedication to getting an education, but also being in a relationship or attempting to get back in a relationship. So yeah. Yeah, definitely. Should we wrap it up? We can edit all this out. Yeah. Well, this is awkward. I don't know how to wrap this up. Well, thank you for coming to our podcast, our TED Talk. Yeah, we had a great time, you know, talking about these movies that we both really enjoy and relating them to our lives, hence the title, but relating them to us and how we experience specifically like self-worth and just like our identities. Yeah. It's been a joy talking to you all. You guys have a great day and we'll catch you later. Bye. Bye.