EP 3

and sausage woke up at one. Oh, that's my day we're talking about. Nope. Not any of those. Testicles. Testicles one, two. Testy one, two. Testy one, two. Seth, give a shout in that mic. Yeah, get in there. Oh, yoo-hoo! Yoo-hoo! Big summer blowout. No, I talk like this, so, let's see. Okay. Testicles one, two. Testicles one, two. Testicles one, two. Testicles one, two. Earphones are right there for you, Seth. Oh, okay. Can I have a pair of earphones? Yeah, I got fake ones. Yeah, remember Seth had the fake ones? Oh, okay. Not much changes around this side. Oh, boy, I'm tingly. What's the podcast called again? What? What's the podcast name again? The Doctor's Minute? Yes. Welcome back to the Texas News. All right. And it's motherfucking go time. Okay. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. You're good? Yeah. Well, welcome back to The Doctor's Opinion. We got Kyle, we got Robbie, and we look good. He just doesn't understand. Oh, yeah. I feel like I can't hear you. You feel like you can't hear me? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Can you hear me? Okay. Okay. Now we'll start all over. Testicles one, two. Testicles one, two. Are we ready? I'm now brown cow. I'm now brown cow. The arsonist is oddly shaped feet. Better get it, get it, get it. Better get it, get it, get it. Better get it, get it, get it. Unique New York. Unique New York. All right. All right, Seth. All right. We got Seth back today. Always a pleasure. Always a pleasure. We found him. Yeah, we found him. We found him, mister. I broke down. That's why you found me. All right. Ready? All right. All right. Coming back to Doctor's Opinion Season 1, Episode 3. Correct. This is Episode 3? Mm-hmm. And we got Seth back again. Yeah. All right. A round of applause for Seth. Welcome. You made it again. After a hard 18 holes out on the course today, it was tough to make it, but I did. You did? I did. How was work today? Oh, it didn't go. You know, I woke up at 7.30, and I said, I got to golf. Ay-yi-yi. So I made a call to my buddy. I said, hey, man, is it a pants day or a shorts day? And it was pretty ugly outside this morning. I said, it's a pants day, as you can see. He said, hey, man, do you think you can call into my work and call me off sick? I'm not feeling too well. And then after that, people went around to golf because I don't have a job anymore. He said, I can make it. I can swing that. You wouldn't believe this. I got fired. Later. I'm the boss. Not yet. Okay. All right. Yeah, after 18 holes of golf, man, getting a face painted. Oh. What was that? After getting a face painted after 18 holes. I don't know what he's talking about. I don't either. I'm talking about face painting. We got to act like this doesn't happen. It never happens. It never happens. Exactly. You're an idiot. You're an idiot. You're retarded. All right, on this episode of Doctor's Opinion, we'll be talking to you guys on how to pick up women. We'll have drunken story time with Uncle Chuck. We'll slip a little bit into the future for Halloween and best and worst candies. Perfect. And that's where we're at. So we'll go ahead and start. How to pick up mid-length women. Oh, slow the fuck down. Asshole. We get it, it's loud. Got that on audio, asshole. I tell ya. The funny thing, and I think we should really do it, is we should stand out there with a big-ass rod. What the heck, let's go get a tool. I'm rocking on the bus. Just hold it tight. We said that last time. I don't know if that made it into the video or not. I don't know. We should fake rope the road. That'd be so funny. I agree. If you're ever having speeding problems, hold the invisible rope. Get your kids out there. No bus stop right now. I need you on rope duty. Slow those fuckers down. Right now we go out there? He's already gone. The cars are like, what the fuck is this idiot doing? I'm out there. Is it a war in America? Why do they look like that? With the traffic nowadays. You never know. So Seth, how did you go about picking up Midwest women? I had to play a home court advantage card. Okay, home court advantage. What's that mean? I bring them somewhere I know very well. People that I'm around, people that I know. People that are going to up the ante of what I'm trying to go for. Okay. It's a bold strategy, man. What else are you going to do? You got to look good. And then how do you serenade them? If you walk up to a girl and she's like, get away, you fucking loser. They're ugly. Yeah, you're ugly and you stink like shit. I have a boyfriend. Now how do you get back into it? I call her. Say it. I, uh. Say it. Say it. I say, well, you suck, I'll beat you. I bet you drink that mouthful of water. But, anywho. Mouthful of water? I bet you drink a little water with it. Yeah. Yeah. And then I say, I bet she doesn't even have an electric toothbrush. And, anywho. Well, you got it. They're coming for something. Alright, well. Alright. Well, I'll tell you how I do get them. Not how they say no. Okay. Home court advantage. Always a good play in my book. Alright. You know, you bring them somewhere nice. Maybe Kelsey's, maybe a roadhouse. And if you really want to dazzle her, steak and shake. It sounds like you're taking her to prom when you say home court advantage. Yeah. Well, I'm just talking. That's a bar that I know the bartender at. You know, because she talks back. You ever go to a basketball game? No, we're saying like you meet them there. They don't know you. Oh, yeah. Yeah. It gets tricky now, doesn't it? Yeah, you're picking them up. Oh, did I just wing that shit? I don't know. Half the shit that squeezed out of my mouth. Shit. Yeah. Like what? Yeah. Slow down, Alpo. God damn it. Audio gotcha. We should have a radar gun. Start clocking them. So, if you didn't know, this podcast is cast from the Midwest. And we've got a lot of traffic issues. Okay. Recall. Alright. Alright. I got a good one. Alright. Alright. So, I'm going to paint the scene for you. Okay. Paint it. Alright. And granted, I'm pretty much married. So, I'm out of the game. But. But. But. But if there was. If there was one more giddy up, one more rodeo. I think you got it down. You got a nice plan going. Slap my ass and put me in. Oh. So, we're at a local bar. Okay. Okay. I'm taking. Is that your first choice of girls? That's where you want to be? No. Okay. But if I'm putting myself in the mind of the young American man. Okay. Bar. Okay. Alcohol. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. 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