Q6-19990324-Larry_Rosenberg-UNK-shining_the_light_of_death_on_life_part_7-43039 Leandra Tejedor

Talk: 19990324-Larry_Rosenberg-UNK-shining_the_light_of_death_on_life_part_7-43039 Leandra Tejedor.json Start_time: 01:22:47 Display_question: You talked about this practice, with mindfulness, of awareness of death, is not appropriate for everybody all the time and I thought it was a universal practice to enhance our life? Keyword_search: mindfulness, awareness of death, suffering, joy, metta, lovingkindness, generosity, depression, meditation, happiness, aging, sickness, death, energy, self-reliance, wisdom, PhD, Korea, Jewish intellectual, New York, books, freedom, Buddha Question_content: Questioner: I am curious, a couple minutes ago you talked about this practice, with mindfulness, of awareness of death, is not appropriate for everybody all the time. Larry: Right Questioner: I am wondering when it wasn't. What seems like sort of a universal thing to me, this awareness of death enhances your tradition of life, and the suffering, is just focused sometimes. Larry: I understand, but let's just get practical for the moment. The first time I taught this stuff, I gave a talk. I don't remember what I said, but it was on this subject, when the center first opened up. And a big bruiser, who's about six four, with shoulders like this, sweat pouring down, he ran out, in the middle of the talk. And I spoke to him later on in the week, and he didn't want to go near it, he wasn't ready for it. So that theoretically, you're correct, but he had a lot of depression in his life. We don't have to go into his biography. But at that point, in his life, that was not a skillful thing to do. Break_line: Now you might say, well, of course it shows that that's exactly what he does need to do. Because he's so frightened, and that's true. But you don't rub a person's face in things. So, what he needed, and we're still practicing together, to this day. This was almost 13 years ago. What he needed was more support. He needed to experience more joy, do a lot of metta, lovingkindness meditation, practice generosity, to do things for other people, to bring some happiness here. And then little by little, when the person's right, they want it on their own, or then it can be a useful practice. So timing is very important. Do you see what I'm getting at? Questioner: The individual that knows… Larry: Well, some people don't know enough to take… sometimes you have to intervene. Because you realize the person is being heroic, and you can see, that they're not able to handle it. And we're not trying to push anyone over the edge. Because we're playing with powerful energy here. It's not a joke to contemplate aging, sickness, and especially death. So, if there's a time in your life when there's been a lot of loss, and depression, and you're new it to meditation, you won't be able to do what I'm talking about, probably. It's useful to hear it, maybe. Some seeds are being planted, but the day may come when you then feel that you want to take it on. And I trust that more. So, and evenings like this. Break_line: Now, what I found, when I first…I didn't want to teach this. I was practicing it myself for years, and not teaching it, because I was concerned about, if you open it up, and just let everyone come, that you don't know who's there. And so, it's very hard to teach that practice group. Because I watch very, very carefully. But one of the things that I've learned, that I don't have to worry so much, is that there's a kind of natural, self-selection, and people who are not ready for it, don't come. By and large. I've only had to suggest, to one or two people, over the years, and one, or two people, on their own said, I don't think this is for me, right now. I said, you're right. There are so many other practices to do. You don't need to do this one. So, part of wisdom, is skillfully guiding your own path, so that you do what's created for you, and useful. And not do things, that are then, when the person is strong enough. Break_line: The Buddha’s teaching puts tremendous emphasis on self-reliance. But if a person's been very seriously wounded, they're not ready to be so self-reliant. And so, there's a lot of support that's important to give. But it's the support that a good parent would give you, help the person get stronger, so they can walk on their own, and then at a certain point, they can hear the full teaching, and do it. That's an overall attitude. It's not just about death. It's in general, as we get to know people. My teachers did it with me. I was a very intellectual type. They did different meditations with me, because they had never met anyone who did so much thinking. This is Korea. Many thinking. Everyone else were farm boys. Who were all these monks? They were typically 18 years old, 20 years old, and they had worked in the rice patties. And here comes this guy with a PhD. Who's questioning everything, who just wants to read books. And the first thing they did was take the books away. But they had never seen a mind like that. Oh, many thinking and they were right. Break_line: So, they had to give me a different medicine. I was not allowed to read a book, for the whole year, I was in Korea. It was excruciatingly painful at first, like a drug addict withdrawal. I didn't read a book for a year. For a Jewish intellectual from New York, that's like killing yourself. But it was tremendously helpful. Now I do, read again. It's like a wonderful thing. It's never been the same. It's not like I think that everything is in the book. I love books. I appreciate them. They're a lot more like a nice dessert. Sometimes more than that. But I have no illusion that I'm going to get free, by reading books, about freedom. It's just ridiculous. End_time: 01:28:14