Good Girl Gone_Segment 1

The host, Mignonette, shares a personal story titled "Good Girl Gone Forever" on Raw Radio. She reflects on how she lost herself in relationships, responsibilities, and silence, leading to survival instead of love. Mignonette emphasizes the importance of facing truths, unmasking, and choosing to thrive rather than just survive. She questions if disappearing as a good girl is a permanent state or a necessary step towards self-preservation and self-realization. Hello. You're tuned into Peanut Butter Tequila and Chocolate Crown on Raw Radio at IamClassicHipHop.com. And I'm your host, Mignonette. I'm the shy girl from the shy. And tonight, this one, this one's personal. This one's called Good Girl Gone Forever. I had to get real so I could heal. Let's go there. And I need you to know this episode isn't just about a lesson that I picked up somewhere along the way. It's about how I changed the way I saw myself. It's a moment that made me stop pretending. A moment that made me stop shrinking. A moment that made me stop calling survival love. This is a soft introduction to what shaped me. It ain't the whole story. It's not every detail. It's not the whole case file. But it's enough truth to help you understand why the good girl had to get gone. So bear with me, gorgeous souls. This one's a little different. This one's a little reveal. So before we get into the full story, we're going to have to go to class for a minute. Now, I know what you're saying. I know what you're thinking. But this is not regular class. This is grown woman math. This is addition, subtraction, multiplication, and division. But not on paper. This is in real life. Because sometimes a good girl comes in whole, and somewhere along the way, she starts disappearing inside of somebody else's equation. So let's start there. So you come in whole. You're already one. Already somebody. Already worthy. Already named. Already enough. Then somebody comes into your life, and they're supposed to be addition. One plus one is supposed to equal two. They're supposed to add peace, protection, alignment, love, leadership, friendship. Add something priceless to your life. But sometimes the person that's supposed to be adding starts subtracting from you. They subtract your confidence. They subtract your voice. They subtract your softness, your sleep. And they subtract the way you see yourself. And before you know it, you're walking around feeling like a negative number in your own life. And then here's this part. Here comes the multiplication. Because sometimes before you can figure out how much you lost, life gets multiplied. Responsibilities multiply. Children multiply. Bills multiply. Fears multiply. Secrets multiply. And then the silence multiplies. And now you're trying to carry more while feeling like less. And then comes the division. Because you know that anything that's trying to control you has to divide you first. Divide you from your family. Divide you from your friends. Divide you from your faith, from your voice, from the version of you that knew better. And divide you from your own name. And when you take a whole woman and you subtract her peace, multiply her responsibility, and divide her from herself, baby, that's not love. That's survival math. And I had to sit with that because I came in whole. I came in loving. I came in soft. I came in believing. But somewhere along the way, I started disappearing in the equation. So I decided to get real and heal. Unmasking will lead me to that freedom. And part of getting real is admitting something to myself that I never wanted to say aloud. Sometimes a good girl does not go bad. Sometimes she'd get gone because she was a good girl. She was submissive. She was humble and meek. She was a freak in the sheets and a lady in the streets. She did not seek the attention of other men. However, she could not win the affection, the protection, or the possession of a safe place to call home. So what's a girl to do when she's trying to get free from it all? Disappear? But, no, she still cares. I mean, sometimes she gets quiet because she cared for too long without being cared for back. Sometimes she gets tired of explaining, tired of forgiving without repair, tired of being soft in places that keep cutting her, tired of protecting the same people who play with her peace, tired of being everybody else's safe place while wondering if anybody ever noticed that she needed safety, too. Because there comes a point where grace cannot keep standing in the place of accountability. Can we talk? There comes a point where we have to tell the truth and shame the devil. There comes a point where healing has to stop performing and the mask has to come off, where peace has to become our present, not just something we pray for and post about and tell people not to interrupt. And sometimes they mourn forever. Now they've got to live with the fact that it is wrong forever. Not because she stopped loving. Not because she stopped hoping. Not because she stopped praying for better. See, she's always been a hopeless romantic. She always believed that love alone is the heart's call. It wasn't because she fell out of love with love. It was because she finally realized that love should not require her to disappear. It was because after decades of trying to stay alive, it came down to one attorney's remarks. If he wants to kill you, he will. The ex parte wasn't willing, it wasn't ready, and it wasn't able to protect me from his ability to unalive me. In that moment, I decided to unhide. Isaiah 5417, no weapon formed against her shall prosper. That was the moment that she decided to no longer just survive, but to live a life that was built to thrive. So when a good girl gets gone, is she gone forever? No. She just goes where she's celebrated and not tolerated. But I know somebody's going to say she's a runner, she's a track star. And maybe. Maybe I did run. But not from love. Not from healing. Not from the hard part. Maybe because she smells smoke in the air and life has taught her where there's smoke, there's fire. And some people will huff and puff and burn the whole house down and be confused by the ashes. What's this stuff falling from the sky? Maybe she ran because one day you're here and the next you're gone. Maybe she ran because she finally took down the red fabric that she had been using for curtains and accepted the truth that these were red flags, not curtains. And sometimes gone is in punishment. Sometimes gone is protection. So here's the question we're sitting with tonight. When a good girl gets gone, is she gone forever? Or did she finally stop disappearing in somebody else's equation? You're listening to Peanut Butter Tequila and Chocolate Crown. I'm your host, Mignonette, the shy girl from the shy. Raw Radio, IamClassicHipHop.com. When we come back, we're going to get deeper into what happens when the image you're protecting was never protecting you back. Let me say that again. When the image you're protecting was never protecting you back. Stay with me.