Dee and Najee PC

Welcome to our gender justice podcast. So what exactly comes to mind when we think of gender violence? We invite you to journey with us along with Reverend Dr. Najee Evans as we break the silence on this overlooked issue of gender violence within the faith community. Dr. Evans will also share some of the challenges he faced within his faith community and we hope that you will find this discussion informative and thought provoking. So what do you say to those who may not understand what this looks like, what gender violence looks like, what sexual assault looks like within the faith community? How do we educate? What are some of the things, because one of the things that I've been thinking about and, of course, we of the Baptist faith and, you know, in all faith communities, I don't think that many understand what gender violence or sexual violence look like. So how do we, what do you think that we can do to raise awareness and to educate people so that they can come to that point of apologizing and being aware and acknowledging, to be held accountable? I mean, how can we, you know, how can we change the dynamics of it and bring these conversations to the table? I would love to hear your opinion on that. So I would say for that is it makes me reflect about another part of my, you know, childhood, especially in high school where I had, there was a member of the church who made me feel very uncomfortable. And so, you know, he would tell me, you know, let's say, for example, if I was to, you know, go to the restroom, because the large-sized church, especially growing up, had over, you know, 500 members. And so, you know, me being, you know, under five, six, you know, I would, you know, go to the restroom. And no matter how, what was going on in church, it could be from a kid. I have a kid. I have all these adults who I go to and everyone saying, well, he's just, you know, always a little funny, yet he's following me in church. And I can't go to the restroom by myself. I can't do certain things. But I remember I, when I got licensed to be a minister, and everybody at the inner service took pictures with me, you know, family pastors, and he came and took a picture with me. A few months, I think, a few weeks later or something like that, he was like, oh, he, as I became, started to study to become a minister, I, now I was hanging around a lot of the men. And so, you know, as I remember growing up, before I became a minister, I would go to church with a lot of the men. And so, as I remember growing up, before I became a minister, I would go to church with like a button-up shirt, you know, khaki pants, and that's it. And so, I think, you know, even before when you talked about, you know, let me pause really quickly. When you talked about, you know, gender violence, like, you know, I looked that up to make sure that I had an understanding of that. And a lot of, you know, research or articles I found, it really, you know, focused on women within, you know, a male-privileged society. And so then I also talked about even as a man being in, you know, male-privileged society, there's also a certain, you know, stereotype of what a certain man should look like. And so, for me, the gender violence came in to play because I didn't look like or act like the typical, you know, stereotypical man, especially within the black church. And so, once I became a minister or, like, training to become a minister, I, you know, my pastor talked to me and said, you need to start wearing suits like this. You need to start, you know, you need to cut your hair. I remember in front of all the ministers, he quoted, I think, 1 Corinthians 11. It talked about how, you know, you're dishonoring God because you have long hair. And, you know, and he said, you know, we don't want you, he said, if you continue to, I remember this because I was in high school as a minister. He said, if you continue to grow your hair out, I'm going to, and this was around, and you probably remember this going to the church a little, a few years after how all the ministers would pray and, you know, anybody on programs. So, my previous pastor made this statement in front of a preacher, all the preachers, deacons, church administrators, everybody. Well, he was like, if you don't cut your hair, I'm going to think you're sweet and a sissy in front of everybody. And so, and, you know, another example back then where I didn't really advocate for myself. I just, you know, laughed and, you know, it hurt. Yet, my coping mechanism was just laugh and just keep it pushing. And so, he made certain statements like that. And other people, you know, members, you know, I'm 5'6". So, I was a, you know, and back then I was much smaller. Short, healthy teeth. Kids, you know, all these grown adults, older, you know, laughing. And so, in my head, I'm like, well, are they right? You know, and, you know, and they didn't validate my feelings at all. And so, you know, growing up, they would make certain comments like that, where especially as teenagers, a lot of the young boys were bringing their girlfriends to school or, you know, to see the church. And they're like, not even bringing their girlfriends. This is our unfortunate reality that gender violence exists even in our religious community, which is why being aware is so essential. And it's important to address this matter in all levels. We have to address these matters openly and acknowledge the problem. And we must commit to creating a safe and supportive environment for survivors and even those who are suffering in silence. We must educate our clergies and our community leaders on how to recognize and respond to signs of abuse, as well as holding the perpetrator accountable. This is not right, and it's not okay. So it's time to reexamine our teaching and interpretation of sacred texts to ensure that we're not perpetuating harmful gender dynamics. Well, beloved, that's all the time we have for today. And we thank you for tuning in, and we hope that this has been some form of knowledge and helpful to you. Until next time, take care and be well. To be able to support our... To be able to support our... To be able to support our... To be able to support our... To be able to support our... To be able to support our... To be able to support our... To be able to support our... To be able to support our... To be able to support our... To be able to support our... To be able to support our... To be able to support our... To be able to support our... To be able to support our... To be able to support our... 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