Brandon Held - Life Is Crazy - Episode 7

In this episode of "Life is Crazy," Brandon Held discusses his experiences and wild events during his time in the Air Force. He emphasizes the strong camaraderie among military personnel and shares stories of friendships, betrayals, and unexpected challenges. One incident involves his friend's wife stealing checks and causing financial trouble, while another reveals a shocking revelation about a friend's wife cheating and lying about their daughter's paternity. Brandon also recounts awkward encounters with a roommate having sex and an inappropriate advance from another woman. He mentions the unsettling occurrence of multiple suicides in the security police barracks. Despite the challenges, Brandon reflects on how he navigated these situations and moved forward. Welcome back to Brandon Held's Life is Crazy, Episode 7. Last episode, I took you through my Air Force career very briefly and quickly, focusing on the career itself. Now, I'm just going to talk about some wild things and just my life during my Air Force career. So, let me start off by saying the camaraderie you feel with people in the military is stronger than, you know, any other job you do in life, in my opinion, based off of, you know, my time in the military versus my time in the civilian world working. And I, you know, I made some at-the-time good friends, John Capato, who's still my friend to this day, Dan Malone was a good friend of mine during my Air Force time, Dave Everson, a good friend of mine, Jeff Malott, we were really good friends during that time. And, you know, I felt really close to all those guys during that time. But, you know, life happens, things happen, people move on. And, you know, there's also incidents that happened that affected some of those friendships. Like, for example, Dave Everson, who I was probably the closest with and spent the most time with on a regular basis between, you know, working on the same flight together and hanging out after work, outside of work, when I got divorced, he basically cut off our friendship. He was interested in her romantically or something, I'm not exactly sure what happened. And so I lost that friendship going through a divorce. So, you know, there was a life lesson, something I learned. My buddy Dan, he has one of the craziest stories that I could say. So, you know, in the military, when you live in base housing and you go on leave, you have to find someone to watch your home. And their duties when watching your home are to check your mail, make sure your mail doesn't build up. If it's wintertime and snowing, they have to shovel your sidewalk and driveway. If it's summertime, they have to keep your grass mowed. You know, just all of the things that you would have to do that you can get in trouble for if you didn't keep your home up to standards. Whoever watches your home for you while you're gone has to do that in your place. And so I asked Dan and his wife to do that while I was going on leave one time. And, you know, went on leave, came back, everything was cool. And then I got this bank statement in the mail, right, because everything wasn't electronic back then like it is now. No phone calls from the bank, no nothing. It was just a bank statement from the mail that showed my checking account was at like minus $1,100. And I was like, how the heck did that happen? So, you know, I called the bank and I asked them, you know, how could this have happened? And they told me about some checks that we had written. And they were signed in my ex-wife's name. And I told the bank, like, we didn't write those checks, you know. I'm not sure what's going on here, but that wasn't us. And so they looked into it further and then the Air Force's Office of Special Investigations, OSI, got involved. And, you know, they looked on video. They caught on video at one time one of the checks was written at a Walmart. And they showed me the video of this girl. And I was like, holy crap, that is Dan's wife, Teresa. So what had happened is while we were on leave, Dan's wife, Teresa, he had sent her over to check our house a couple of times. And she just came in and helped herself to checks and took our checks and went and wrote checks around town and purchased things from our checking account. And, you know, once it was all said and done and OSI realized who it was, they brought me in and interviewed me. And they asked me about it. And, you know, I said, yeah, that's Teresa on video. And they wanted to burn Dan because it was Dan's wife. And I said, you know, Dan's one of my good buddies. There's no way I could believe that he had anything to do with this. I said, I assure you, he didn't know this was happening, right? And so they kept grilling me a little bit and they didn't know if I was just sticking it out for my friend or what. And I was like, look, trust me, if I thought he was capable of doing it, if I thought he was involved, I would flat out say, but I believe with everything he had nothing to do with this. And so that's kind of the end of the story for me. I mean, yes, it actually, even though we found out we didn't write the checks and the bank found that out and refunded our money, you know, there was still a credit system, right? And there's a check writing system that just knows that checks with my name were bad checks and they got bounced. And so it did hurt my credit for a few years on writing checks more specifically. Excuse me. But the story gets much more crazy for Dan because this opens like a whole can of worms. So he confronts his wife, Teresa, and he asks her about this, you know, and she comes clean. And then she eventually comes clean with everything. And so come to find out, you know, Dan was just blindly letting his wife take control of the finances, paying the bills, take his money, do whatever. And she was taking the money and just spending it and not paying the bills, like the phone bill, the electric bill, the car payment, whatever, the bills that needed to be paid. She just wasn't paying them. And he was like trying to figure out how she was getting away with this. And he, you know, called some of these places. And she was using his military career to get out of, you know, making these payments and delaying it without anyone noticing. She was saying that, oh, Dan was deployed to Iraq, which wasn't true. She didn't have access to his accounts, which also wasn't true. And, you know, she would pay it first thing. As soon as she could get a hold of Dan in Iraq and get the money, she would pay it. Right? So Dan finds out, like, holy crap, I got all this debt, you know, six months worth of debt. You know, she did this to my buddy. And, you know, like, this isn't, you aren't the person that I thought you were. And he was like, I want a divorce. Oh, by the way, he wants to fight for custody for his two-year-old daughter in this divorce. And his wife says, all right, fine, you want to divorce me, fine, but you're not fighting custody for our daughter because it's not your daughter. What do you mean it's not my daughter? Oh, well, I cheated on you when you were in Air Force boot camp, and I got pregnant by someone else. It's not your daughter. It's so-and-so's daughter. And he didn't believe it, so he took the DNA test to see if that was his daughter. And sure enough, was not his daughter. So not only did he get all this debt, he's now lost his wife, and now he's lost a daughter. So they get divorced. His wife moves back to West Virginia, where they're from, and takes his daughter, who is now no longer his daughter because he had no rights to her. She lost any kind of ability to be in touch with her or be a father to her. She took all that away. And so, I mean, imagine how devastating this was for Dan. And, you know, he's still trying to take it all in stride and make life go on. And, you know, he actually did pretty well. I think he was stronger than a lot of people. And to just kind of wrap a bow on that story, you know, he had been divorced to Teresa for a couple years. And when his enlistment came up and he got out of the Air Force and he flew back home to West Virginia, where they were from, his ex-wife went out on the front yard of her parents' home and put a shotgun in her mouth and blew her face off the day he arrived from home. So that's just a wild and crazy story. But that's a story of my life and something that happened while I was in the Air Force. You know, and another thing that happened when I was in the Air Force, I walked into when I was still living in the barracks and with my roommate, I walked into the room one day and, you know, the door wasn't, there was nothing on the door indicating he's busy. So I get in there and he's having sex with this girl from, you know, downstairs, another security police woman. And, you know, I see him in the middle of doing it. She's sitting on top of him. And she just, like, he's like, get out of here, get out of here. And she just turned around and smiles and looks at me. And so I turn around and leave, you know, like embarrassed, embarrassed that I saw the whole thing, you know. And then, like, a few weeks later, the same person asked me, hey, can you give me a ride to the post office, right, which is like a block away, but it's freezing cold in North Dakota. It was wintertime. So I thought, okay, well, maybe she just legitimately doesn't want to walk to the post office because it's so damn cold. So I knock on her door and I come in the room. And, you know, she's like, come in. And I walk in and she's in just a towel. She's like, oh, I just got out of the shower. I need to get dressed. And she drops her towel right in front of me, like she's expecting me to make a move on her or something. And I just kind of stood there and then turned my head and said, oh, I'm sorry. I'll let you get dressed because I just saw this girl having sex with my roommate, like, a week or two ago, you know. And here she was trying to make some advancement towards me. And, you know, I was just like, I'll pass on that. And I tried to make it as cool as possible and not embarrass her. But, yeah, that wasn't going to happen. So that was kind of a crazy thing that happened to me. Also, while I was in the barracks, three people committed suicide within three months in the security police barracks. I think maybe all of them hung themselves, but I'm not completely sure. And that was when I pretty much was new, am I not? So I just remember thinking, like, oh, my God, where did the Air Force send me? You know, like, what is going on here? Everyone's killing themselves. And so that was pretty wild. And then I made friends with this couple that also lived in the barracks. And then they approached me one day, and they were like, hey, you know, we wanted to ask you a question. And I said, sure, what's up? And they were like, we want you to film us having sex. And I was like a really shy, reserved, 17-, 18-year-old kid. I think I was 18 at this time. And I was like, what? Why me? I can't do that. And they were like, oh, no, we think you'd be perfect, and we don't want anyone else to do it, but we trust you. We'd want you to do it. And I was just shocked that they asked me to do this. And to this day, like, I question what their intentions were. Like, were they hoping I was going to join in? Was the guy bisexual? Like, I really had no idea why they ever asked me to do that. But that's just wild that they did ask me to do that. And then I was out in the field for work one day, and this sergeant that I was working with, he was really dejected. And he comes up to me and he says, hey, Brandon, would you mind doing me a favor? I need your help. And I said, sure, man, what do you need? And he said, well, you know, I married a girl from Korea. She's Korean. And, you know, I'm hearing rumors that when I go out in the missile field, she cheats on me. And I think she's cheating on me. And I go, okay, like, what do you want me to do about that? And he's like, I want you to just call her and flirt with her and hit on her. And I go, she doesn't know who I am. That would never work. And he goes, just try it for me, please. Just try it. Just call her, tell her you got her number from a friend because you saw her in the club and you wanted to, you know, meet her and get to know her. And I said, all right, man, I think it's stupid. It's a waste of time. But, okay, I'll do that for you. And so I called her. And, you know, I told her my name and I followed that story. Yeah, I saw her in a club. I thought she was cute. I wanted to get to know her and meet up with her and hook up with her. And sure as crap, she was, like, totally into it. She was receiving it and she was flirting with me back. She didn't know anything about what I looked like. She didn't know anything about me. But she was like, yeah, definitely, I want to get to know you. I want to meet you. And she was all on board with it. And he's sitting there listening to the whole thing, right? He's listening to his wife say to this guy that she's never met, yeah, I want to meet you. I want to hook up with you. And so, you know, obviously he's pretty upset at this point, and so he calls the flight sergeant. We explain what happened and what's going on, and he asks if he can go back to base to confront his wife. And the flight sergeant agrees to let him do that. So he gets him in his gear and he takes him back to base, and then he eventually takes the sergeant to his house. And then he's like, well, I'll go in with you. I want to make sure, you know, nothing bad happens. There's not going to be any fighting. Nothing bad is going to happen. So they go and they unlock the door and they go in the house, and when they come in, his wife comes running out from the upstairs, butt-ass naked, like, what are you doing home? What are you doing home? And, you know, the flight sergeant is standing right there, and she's totally not even acknowledged the fact that she's just standing there naked in front of the flight sergeant. So the sergeant runs upstairs and he looks and there's a guy hiding in his closet. So he went home and caught her having sex with someone in the moment when he arrived. And, like, you know, obviously that led to a divorce and everything else, but it all kicked off because he asked me to call and flirt with his wife. And it's just crazy that there's another thing that happened while I was in the Air Force. All these stories I'm telling you, these things never really happened in my life ever again after that. This was just my time in the Air Force. And then a couple more things, you know, there was a neighbor that lived down the street from us, and she was married and she had a child, and she came over to my house one day while my wife wasn't home. And she, like, blatantly just told me she was into me, and she sat on my lap and kissed me, you know, and I pushed her away. Like, whoa, what are you doing? I can't do this. You're married. And she was like, I don't care, you know, I'm not happy with my husband. I think you're, you know, handsome. I want to get with you. And mind you, this girl was supposed to be friends with my wife. She didn't care. And, you know, she was totally willing to betray her, betray her husband, all that. She had no cares. She just was going to come after me, and it didn't matter. And then, finally, I went over to a friend's house one day, and I won't say the name to protect the innocent, but, you know, he wasn't there. And his wife answered the door in a T-shirt with her nipples perking through her shirt, like, you know, clearly not dressed, right, only wearing a T-shirt, nothing else. And I asked if he was there, and she said, no, but, you know, he'll be back soon. Come on in. And then she told me to sit down and have a seat. And I sat down, and I had, you know, a seat, and I started a conversation. I don't even remember what the conversation was. And so she sat on the couch, like, across from me, you know, at like a 45-degree angle, and she turned her body facing my direction, and then she picked her legs up, and she put them on the couch, like Indian style, where her feet are touching together, and she was showing me the full Mati, like everything, right. And it was like this open invitation to, hey, I'm here, I'm available, you know, if you're interested. And I was just blown away by this, like I was married, she was married to my friend, like this was just all crazy. And these are all things that happened to me while I was in the Air Force, you know, and there may have been more things, but these are the things that stick out to me, and these are the things that I remember. And, you know, for a long time, these things left my mind, some of them, some I'll never forget, you know, like they always kind of stayed in my mind, but some of them left my mind until memories jogged them back into my brain, and I just thought about how, man, that was a crazy four years of my life, you know, so many things happened to me in those four years at my time in Minot in the Air Force that just doesn't happen in life. It's not normal. And I will finish by saying this. After working different careers and different jobs, you know, my time in the Air Force overall was really great. I know I had a really bad incident that really stopped me from continuing my Air Force career. And, again, you know, that's something where if maybe I had a father figure or good role models in my life, they could have helped me walk through that. But I walked through it on my own, and I made the decision that was best for me at the time based on what I could do and what I could know at 20, 21 years old. But the people I worked with were great. You know, I didn't hate going to work. I didn't hate the people that I worked with. I liked them, actually. I enjoyed them. I had a good time working with the people that I worked with and got along with everyone. There was one guy that was kind of annoying because he was a Staff Sergeant that was kind of a one-upper. You know, like whatever story you told, he had to one-up you. He had a better story, right? It didn't really matter, right? Whatever you said, he had to one-up you with a better story. And, you know, that got on everyone else's nerves. But he wasn't a bad guy. He was a good guy overall, just annoying with his one-upper stories. But if I had to tell my sons to go into any military branch, it would definitely be the Air Force. You know, I did spend time in the Army, which you'll hear about later, and it doesn't even closely compare to my time in the Air Force and how good that was. And that's where I will end this episode of the podcast. And so I believe I just about covered everything that I wanted to cover during my four-year span in the Air Force and everything that I went through both on a personal level in relationships, a personal level with friendships, with coworkers, and my time in the military as a career itself. And then, you know, next episode, I will talk about the next part of life that I entered into when I left the Air Force. Thanks again for joining me, and I will talk to you in Episode 8.