Facebook Support

Hello? Hello? Yes, sir. Thanks for calling Facebook. Can I help you? Yes, yes. Aren't you trying to scam me on the other line? Sorry? Aren't you trying to scam me on the other line? No, sir. I'm calling from Facebook. Your Facebook's been hacked. That's why I called you. Oh, why did my Facebook get hacked? Yes, sir. Someone will hack your Facebook. Why is this shit happening? Sir, I can't see you in the system. Your Facebook's been logged into three different states. I didn't log into my Facebook, though. What are you talking about? I'm talking about your Facebook, sir. Do you fix your Facebook account by yourself? How do I fix a Facebook account? I ain't a techie. Sir, don't worry, sir. I will guide you how to fix your account by yourself. Just follow my instructions state by state. Oh, all right. I guess. Okay. Okay, sir. So can you tell me, sir, which cell phone are you using? It's an iPhone or an Android phone? I've got Windows 3.1 on my phone. Do you have an iPhone? Well, I call it my phone, but yeah, it's an iPhone. Okay, sir. So now open your app store in your phone. Okay. APP store. What do I do after that? Sir, now I'm connected with the server, Facebook security server, okay? What's a security server? Now I will give you the one app. It's called the Facebook security server. Are you using Skype? Are you using Skype? Yes. How did I find that? Because they have all information. That's why I call you another number, because they have all information about you. Yeah, but I hacked you. I hacked your phone. I hacked your phone. I was able to find out that your carrier's bandwidth and that they're going to shut you off in a few fucking minutes. How can I say that? How can I say that? Because you're a filtering pig. Sorry? You're a filtering pig. You don't want to fix your account? You don't want to fix your account? Listen, sir. You don't want to fix your account? Go fuck yourself. What are you doing up this late, motherfucker?