Ray ENDING

The speaker had a conversation with Ray that made them reflect on their behavior. They realized they were becoming bitter and selfish, but a small incident made them reconsider their path. They decided to make positive changes and started working out to gain confidence. They became more assertive but also had a dangerous encounter. They were determined to continue their journey towards self-improvement. To say I thoroughly enjoyed that conversation with Ray would be an understatement. Commiseration is liberating, especially if it drives a person towards wholesome change. As I listened to Ray's stories, I found myself at the B or B crossroads, bitter or better. And the path I chose, I knew would most likely alter the trajectory of my life. Now, I'm not gonna say I hated myself, but I did despise my personality. And step by step, I was on the verge of becoming bitter. It didn't happen all at once, but I gradually noticed how I started to treat people. I became detached and suspicious, questioning everybody's motives. I was less inclined to help people, and selfishness started to take root in my heart. Now, the straw that broke the camel's back was when an old man and I approached the same door. The nice thing to do would be to allow him to go before me, but screw that, I was fresh out of niceness. So I ran to get in front of him, and I allowed the door to slam shut in his face. It didn't bother me then, but I thought about it later that night. What? Don't judge me. A few steps down that path was enough to nudge me in the opposite direction. I found myself on the pathway to better. There were only two paths. Well, three, if I were inclined to un-life myself, but that would never happen. So, out of frustration, I started lifting weights. The stronger I got, the more confidence I had. I became more aggressive. Not that I would start a fight, but I sure as hell would not run from one either. One unfortunate soul found himself on the wrong end of a thick rope being dragged several feet along a concrete parking lot behind my car before I came to my senses. But that's another story for another day. I had completely missed the stop at Good Guy Circle and was quickly trekking towards another destination. Armed with bulging biceps and cutting confidence, I was ready to kick ass and take names. As the proverbial train of insecurity pulled into the uncertain garage of change, I mentally checked my resolve. Next stop, Bad Boy Lane.