Synthesis Project Podcast

The speakers discuss various readings they had in their class, including "Troublemakers" and James Baldwin's "A Talk to Teachers." They reflect on the importance of allowing students to think for themselves and not conforming to traditional molds. The conversation also touches on the negative impact of indigenous boarding schools and the challenges of being a female teacher. They express the desire for making meaningful change in education. Okay. I'm just going to roll, and I'll cut anything out that's not there. Okay. We can do the beginning part at the end unless you have this, if you want to start the same way. Do you want to start with that? I think it would be easier if we just, like, not as formal. If we just made it more of like a conversation. Yeah. Because now we're on roll. Like, and it's not that stressful having to start. Yeah. And if we don't like something, you just go, And then I can cut it. Okay. Would you like me to talk about Troublemakers first? Sure. Okay. I feel like, I don't know, I feel like if I'm eating something, it might... You really want to do a mukbang. No, but actually, I feel like when I'm eating, I'm like... They're going to hear every single crunch. Yeah. So, um, I didn't think that through. If you need to eat in between, take us, fine. We're doing a mukbang now, apparently. No. You can join me in. We are doing a podcast, though, so, I mean, you can be in here. Oh, are you doing it right now? Yeah, we're on record right now. I mean, if you're making noises or whatever. Yeah. Okay. That would fly in Minnesota. Okay. I wouldn't. Okay. Could you ask me a question, like, ask the first thing, like, a question. Okay. What are some things that we can reflect on upon our eating? So, we read a lot of different material this semester. What are some readings that really stick out to you? There are a few that stick out to me, and the first one is, I would say, Troublemakers. It was one of the ones we did for our first week of class, and it talked about a story of Zora, a student who didn't really fit in with her class, and the parents and teachers didn't really know how to accommodate for her in school. Those behavior problems resonate with me, with my experience in education, and also with the students that I've seen at Hidden River. I think, is that going to pick up? Oh, I forgot about that. We have this on, like, all the time. Is it fine to have that in the background? It could be some background music. It could be some background music. But then we can't control it, because it's not different tracks. Hmm? Because, like, having different tracks, that can lower the sound of music. If it's on the same track, you can't separate them, for editing purposes. All right, I'll just turn it off. Yeah, or turn it down. You want to ask the question again? Yeah. Yeah. So, we've read a lot of different... Mayanna's a little bit... Restart. I don't need to say, um, on this part. Yeah. Okay. So, we've read a lot of different material in this class. What was a specific reading that stood out to you? A specific reading that stood out to me was Troublemakers. It was one of those readings we did for our first week of class, and it just told the story of Zora. That was the first chapter. And Zora was a student who had behavior problems, was different from other students in her class. And teachers didn't really know how to interact with her. And that's been a big concern to me with my educational experience of being someone that's gone through behavior problems and not fitting in at school. And then, like, how can we as teachers help fix that? And I've seen a lot of those behavior problems also at Hidden River. And it's just thinking about what types of mindsets can we come in about, like, why these students are behaving in a certain way. Why did Zora behave in a certain way? And it was a really... I think it was a great start to the class because it allowed for that thinking back to maybe some personal experiences, but also what we might see in our schools. Yeah, for sure. I like this idea of, like, pivoting towards kids not having to fit a certain mold that... kids not having to fit a certain mold that's been created for them. Should I transition now? Yep. Okay. Do you want me to ask a question? No, I think this is pretty good. You just want to walk away? Yeah. Okay. That kind of goes along with the reading that I picked out. It's a reading that I was really drawn to, which was the James Baldwin, A Talk to Teachers. It really stood out to me. It was also... Okay. One quote in particular really stood out to me, and it's almost a more poetic version of what you just said. It says, The purpose of education is to create in a person the ability to look at the world for himself, to make his own decisions, to say to himself, this is black or this is white, to decide for himself whether there is a God in heaven or not, to ask questions of the universe and then learn to live with those questions. It is the way he achieves his own identity. This really stood out to me because I feel like that's the purpose of education is not to force people to think a certain way, but rather to encourage them to think in their own way. I read James Baldwin, A Talk to Teachers, in one of my other CI classes as well, The Issues of Urban Education. It was actually a reading we did on the first week of class. It was this almost forewarning that there are problems in education. This was a long time ago. This was in the 60s, right? His same words still resonate today. What aspiring teachers have to deal with and what teachers can keep fighting for change. So much has changed since the 60s. Some of it's been good, some of it's been bad, but there is change that is possible. Throughout all of this course, I've been looking for those ways of how to change things. Whether I'm just being over-optimistic or I'm reaching for things that might not be possible, I want to have that there. James Baldwin, I feel like, still gives some of that optimism that there is possibility. That means a lot to me. Talking about some of the readings that don't... Talking about some of the readings that shed some of the bad light about schooling, one of our... What we did for our base group, the indigenous boarding schools, that is definitely a sore thumb in what the education system has seen in the past hundred years, even longer, because these boarding schools and the assimilation of indigenous peoples have been happening for centuries. Boarding schools as a whole, it really... There was a detrimental impact on the families, especially people that were forced to attend school, that were taken from their families. How do you repair that harm? What can I do as a teacher to make a difference when the people that are the same skin color as me are the ones that cause that harm? Those have been difficult questions. They're not things I can find answers for. I can watch inspirational movies. I can watch the other things that are way out there, that are these stories of victory, but that's not always what happens. How can I still make my experience matter, even if it is just small things? That's difficult, because I want to make big change, not just small. Small change, in reality, is big. Changing one person, that means a lot. It's huge, but I set my expectations way too high, I guess. Yeah, you do. I'm sorry. Small change is change, though. That's how I always think about it. It's hard when there's so much history that has shaped how the education system is, and there's so much that we can't change. Especially with the indigenous boarding schools. Especially with the indigenous boarding schools, and also just teaching, too, has just had a rough history, like the role of teachers. The Feminization of Teaching article stood out to me for that reason. They said in the article, teaching is one of the highly feminized semi-professions, like nursing and library keeping. I don't like that quote. You don't like that? Okay. The Feminization of Teaching article says that feminization has contributed to teaching's low status, and that hit me personally. That hit me personally as well, as a female in teaching. I feel like there's almost a pressure to be less of a feminine person in teaching, because of all this history of feminine teaching being looked down upon, and women in those roles. There are so many factors that cause it to be looked down upon, but females being the primary gender that has been teaching for whatever, however long, a hundred years. I feel like there's pressure to be like yourself as a teacher, be gender neutral, when that's just not possible. Do you think there's a better way of you saying that? I feel like you've tried to get to something. Yeah, I'm struggling. But that's the point that I think you're trying, it's just not coming across. Yeah. I don't know where you're going with it. What do you mean? I don't know what you mean by, because you say feminization, women in a role are looked down upon, but I would say that, because it's a feminine role, because it's a feminine role, like being a nurse, like being a library keeper, you're supposed to be a woman to be in these roles, but I wouldn't say that being a woman makes you be looked down on in education, looked down on in education, because it's almost an expected role, so being feminine is almost associated with being teaching. Well... I could be wrong, but I feel like a lot of people, instead of having to be gender neutral, it's almost expected that you're going to have a female-esque teacher, and when you have women that play masculine roles in schools, it feels weird, like disciplinarian roles, at least in my experience as a man. I think what I'm trying to say is, feminine teachers are the norm, that's the norm, and kids seem to like the fact that male teachers aren't the norm, and it's like... I feel like students kind of think, like, if a male is a teacher, then it's like, oh, they could have done a more masculine job, but here they are, like, contributing to education, like, whoa. But then one of us was like, oh, yeah, there are women, so they're going to be a teacher, and that's where I feel like, you know? Okay. I think I see where you're going with this, and I think it's very tied in with race, with teachers of color, so for the people that you think are saying, like, oh, the men that are cool, like, it's usually boys. Am I wrong? Not necessarily. Or is it girls that are saying that too? I think it's everyone. Like, I think even myself as a kid, like, when I first had a male teacher, and, like, I think it was eighth grade that I had my first male teacher. And I was like, oh, he's chill. Like, he's not like the other teachers, you know? I wonder if that even goes farther into my point that, like, looking at how teachers of color can get involved in schools, they can enrich the entire environment. It's not that they're just there to be role models for students of color. Like, when you have a teacher of color, you get that different perspective. I'm not saying that, like, men as a whole, with everything of how men are in society and how they're expected to do more in quotes, they're expected to go in other jobs, and they're largely leaders and people that are making decisions instead of women, but there is that whole thing. But as a whole, for education, it's mostly white women. And when you have someone that's different, even if it is a male perspective, which is usually dominated through, like, showing power or showing force, being a politician or being a businessman, you see a man who's compassionate as a teacher. I think that's different. And for teachers of color, they provide a different experience, and some of the best classes that I've had are with teachers of color. And I didn't have a teacher of color until I got to college. I think I'm the same way. And getting a different experience has allowed me to see different things in a different way. And I feel like that might be where you're going with the feminization article of, like, your identity plane, and you're not sure, like, how to fit, are you supposed to be, maybe would it be better for you, for the children if you were more gender neutral? Like, would they maybe see you differently? Sorry, not to interrupt, but I think, yeah, I think, like, what you're getting at, like, I am the norm, which makes me, and the norm has historically been looked down upon. Like, and this article, like, also doesn't even really mention that much of, like, intersectionality, like, black female teachers. And that's a whole different, like, that's honestly, like, I can't even speak that much to that, because I haven't, like, you know, I haven't had that many, like, teachers of color, like you said. But, yeah, that's what I'm saying. Like, female teachers are the norm, and that norm has been looked down upon. And so I feel like a lot of female teachers might feel some pressure to not conform to that. If that makes, I don't know. No, I think it does make more sense. Yeah. But, I mean, maybe you can touch on it more as we get into the conversations, like, this is just about the readings. Yeah. So, let's get to that. Yeah. Do you want to start further reflections on service learning, or do you want to let me start? You can go. Okay. Do you want to ask me a question? I'm sure you'd like to. Yeah. I feel like we had a good ending there. Okay. I kind of said, like, maybe we can move into different sections. Yeah. I'll say this. Yeah. Let's transition into talking more about our real-life service learning experience. So... Okay. That was not... I said, uh, and uh. Yeah. Maybe you don't have to say transition. Just, like, let's move on to our service learning experience. Okay. But you want me to say it? I can say it. Okay. Um, let's move on to our service learning experience now. Some of the first things that I took away from the class that I... Okay. Let me reset that. Let's move on to our service learning experience. Mm-hmm. Some of the first takeaways I got from going to Hidden River were those critical conversations I had with students. And I can still remember one of the first conversations I had, and I wrote about it in my reflections for each of my classes. It's things that I've, like, talked to my friends about. I've asked them. And that first interaction was when I went into school and one of the students called me a racist. I just... Like, that was just not something I expected. Even though I'd been in a school that... Like, I was in Capitol Hill, which is also a school in St. Paul, and it was a very diverse student body. There weren't any students that called me racist there. Like, Hidden River as a school is very different culturally than Capitol Hill, because Capitol Hill is a magnet. Hidden River is a public school. And just... I remember my thought process and the relationship that I may be... could have or, like, what will it be with this student? Like, this is the first thing they say to me. It wasn't the first. This was, like, one of the first conversations I had. And... Wait. Stop. This is just because I'm curious. What made them say that? Just because you were there and you were a white person? Like... Like, did you say anything for that? Yes. Yes. And I probably shouldn't include that context. And it wasn't a mistake. It was a growing moment for me because I asked for respect. And this is a black girl. She has nothing to do... She has nothing that she should respect me for. For all she knows, I could just be another white man that's coming into her life and just trying to take things and not learn from her. But she called me out right away. And she was just testing the waters. She was seeing how I would respond. I think that was a lot of it. Yeah, I don't think she truly meant that. But, like... The funny thing... She didn't want to put you in her place, you know? The funny thing is that she's now in my after-school program for History Day. I don't know if she actually wants to be there. She might just want to talk with her friends. And she's a very challenging student in my after-school program. But I honestly love the interactions with her more because she is challenging me. She's making me have to make those growth moments. Instead of me going to a 95% white school where the kids don't have these challenges, I'm facing this now. And there's lots of things that I've tried to take away from other classes of not looking at this like it's a real-life experience. Because those are thinking about ways... There's lots of things that I've had to do about reflection on what am I actually doing in school. But the interactions I have with students are making me grow. And I wouldn't get them in other places. Yeah. It's crazy how different Hidden River is compared to... Even University of Minnesota. We are still majority white. And I thought this was exiting my bubble of comfortability in terms of diversity. But I'm like, whoa. I don't know anything about anything. Coming to this school was pretty eye-opening. Do you have any critical conversations that you can remember or just interactions with students that either made you feel good maybe things that you were like, oh, I should have said something else. Do you have anything like that? I mean... I'm lucky. My kids are pretty nice. If anything, they just kind of are more like pranksters than like, you know, just saying, you're racist. Like, you know, it's more like, okay, let's mess with this student-teacher kind of thing. I mean, I see right through it, but I think it's funny. But I don't know. I guess one thing I would think about is like, I think there was one... Recently, there's been a student in my class, and I haven't seen her since this happened, but she apparently got in a very terrible fight and my teacher, Mr. Gallagher, said it was the worst fight he's seen in six years. She got her artificial braids torn out of her head. And, yeah. And Mr. Gallagher was saying, some kids are just raised to fight back. And then he was like, well, we still had to spend both of them. It doesn't matter who started it. So many grades with that. Yeah. It's just like, how do you deal with stuff like that? Like, it's obviously wrong to physically fight people, but if you have to fight someone back, that's a whole different thing. If that's like... The girl's black. If that's a thing that her parents taught her, that might just be how she was taught. Like, I don't want to... Like, you've got to fight back against some things. It's not just you can take a punch. Yeah. Like, if someone says something to you, you might... And that's been a big cultural shift. Yeah, that's a huge cultural thing at this school. Like, fights or just like... I see so many people pushing each other, touching each other, which is crazy to me. A lot of it is play fighting, too. Yeah. And it's so hard for me to adjust. Like, because I want them to... Like, I get scared and get hit in the face walking down the hallway or something. Yeah, I wouldn't say I feel scared. I know the students haven't... I guess maybe that's because I'm a guy. I could have something... You're also tall, and you're not the same height as the middle school. Yeah, I haven't... I know that there are probably a few of the middle schools that could probably absolutely deck me. Yeah. But, like, they haven't felt threatening to me. And maybe that's because of the relationship I've tried to build with all of them. Yeah, no, I don't feel... I don't feel threatened by anyone. I'm just saying, like, I see... When I'm walking down the hall, they get to the class, and during passing period, I'm like... Yeah. Y'all are shoving people around. I really... Anyways, gosh. Yeah, get back to the critical conversations. There was one student I have in my classes. They were sitting down. It was during passing period. And I was like, what are you watching on their phone? And I looked down at their phone, and they were watching a fight. I don't know if it was from the school. It might have been from, like, on the Snapchat story or something. And I was like, why are you watching that? Why is that exciting? And they just straight up asked me, like, oh, you're not from the suburbs, are you? You're not from the city. Yeah. I'm like, no, I'm not. I'm like, okay. I had some kids be like, oh, have you seen this show? I forget what it was called. I was like, no. And they were like... I was like, what is it? And they were like, it's a show where, like, girls fight each other. And it was, like, apparently very popular with them. And I was like, what? Is this a generational thing? I don't... Yeah. Where is this coming from? Yeah, that same kid, right after that, they told me, just a quote that just kind of shook me to my corpses. This kid is in eighth grade. He said, at the end of the day, you're either going to fight with your fists or you're going to fight with guns. And I'm like... And he said he's going to pick guns. Because... I don't know if he's being serious. But... Yeah. Like, this kid... That's what... Is that what he genuinely thinks? It might be. And I'm just like... It makes me worried because, like, when I was here last year, there were kids that were in, like, one of the St. Paul high schools. They just, like, they just stab each other to death. And it's like... What if these kids decided to get more violent and just throwing punches? Mm-hmm. Like, there could be... One of these kids that I know could die. Or I might never see them again. Yeah. That's scary. Yeah. Like, on Monday, I was in a class, and I saw there was a student that was just feeling... I just knew that they were feeling down. They weren't responding. They weren't doing the activity. I tried to talk to them a little bit, and I was like, what's going on? But I just didn't get... I didn't have enough time. Mm-hmm. Like, there were other kids that wanted my attention. They weren't responding to me. I couldn't get through to them. I tried to ask. I tried to sit there for a little bit. I could have done... I feel like I could have done more. But after that class, the kid got in a fight. Overboy. Yeah. And it's like, what... If I would have stayed with them for a little bit longer, could I have changed something? Yeah, but you also... Well, I mean, you're not a fortune teller. Like, you can't know what's going to happen. So... I knew they were feeling down, though. If I would have just spent more time, I would have been like, does... Whatever's getting you, does it matter that much? Could I have prevented a fight, prevented them from being suspended so they can stay... Because this kid is smart. Yeah. Like, so... All of these kids are so smart. Right. But it's just... Well, first of all, it's not your fault. And you tried. Second of all... Like... Yeah, well... It's so tough. It's so tough to think... Like, those are the things I want to keep learning. Well, that's also a learning experience. And that's a point of like... Yeah, that might have been... That's a point of like, your failure is going to help you, ultimately. Like, next time... Especially if it's that same student, it'll be like, okay... Let me focus on... Like, you know... I don't know if I will see this student again, though. Because I... This student may have already been in other fights before. And I've heard that some students, if they have like a three fight rule strike, they're out of the school. Oh, goodness. So... Some students, where they've gotten so many fights, if they get any more, they're out of the school. That has to get expelled. And... These students, I want to stay in my classes. Like... Even the student that called me a racist, and the student that gives me challenges, even though they... are such a pain in my butt in the after-school program, I want them to stay there. I want them to be in that environment. Because... Like... Who knows why they're acting this way? Maybe I'm just over-analyzing it. Maybe there's nothing going on. It's just that they just... Maybe that's just who they are. But like... I want to give my assistance where I can. If they don't want my help, that's okay. They can say no. But I'm not... I don't want them to bring other people down. I don't want them to hurt other people. And when you're building that hostile environment, there's lines that can't be crossed. And maybe that's my own perceptions of what I think is good and bad. But like... I feel like there are just some lines that are like a humanitarian line. And maybe there are cultural differences. But like... I don't believe people should hit each other. I don't believe in violence. There are some people that do believe in violence and do believe about fighting back. And how do I adjust to a community, like specifically a black community that's gone through the murder of George Floyd in Minneapolis? That sometimes all they can do is fight back. Because that's the way that they can show their power. Right. And that's so difficult for me to grasp as a white person. Right. This is like a question I've been thinking about. What do you do when you really do not agree with a student's values? I don't know. Say someone is just totally homophobic or something. But they actually believe that gay people shouldn't be married. What do you do? Should you respect that opinion? Or should you try to change it? Because in your heart, that's wrong. Don't tell me. There's no way to be unbiased. Which is really frustrating. But also, we're the teachers. If our goal is to make the world how we think it should be, then I'm going to sprinkle a little bit of my ideology into there. How else do you do it? I'm just worried about changing the world to what I want it to be. What if my vision of the world has some parts of it that people don't necessarily... Well, that's also why we have multiple teachers. Yeah. That's a good point. Right. The fact that you can't make such a humongous impact is also kind of a good thing. Because what if you're biased? What if I could just flip and say all of these problems are gone anymore, but what if that just made other problems? Right. I guess it's good in a sense that... You only have so much power. We're in a revolution. I'm going through this like I don't... I'm not necessarily saying that I'm the one that wants power when I'm saying I want to make change. I'm saying I want to make change so that the power... But you do need power to make change. I do need power to make change. It's tough. That's something that we'll have to keep reflecting. There's not an answer to that right now. There's not an answer to that right now. Yeah. Okay, I want to just circle back to something real quick about wanting just... The more you get to know a kid who has a history of being a bit violent, it makes it so hard because you know the potential that they have. The one girl who got into the fight, she got suspended. And I was very disappointed because she wasn't here today. She was still suspended. And I was just very disappointed because I really wanted to talk to her. Well, first of all, she's a fun person. I like talking to her. She's awesome. And I also wanted to talk to her and be like, are you okay? Because I was concerned about her. And that was also a moment where I was like, whoa. These kids' lives are now impacting me. And that's how close I'm getting to them. And I'm like, I also know she's smart. And the more I work with her, the more she's uncomfortable asking me questions about her work. And other kids too lately have just been so happy with even them asking me one question. Like, can you help me with this? People who don't usually do their work. I'm like, whoa. Like, this is awesome. And then they're like, can I go outside or something? And you're like, but girl, now you're back to like. But they're not back. They're still there. They still made progress. But you're like, well. It's like. And now you're missing out on school. And you could be doing so well in school, right? Like, yeah. I wish there was a way for these kids to realize the power they have. Because so much of this feeling like you go back, that's what the kids feel. Like, so many of these kids think they're not smart. They call themselves dumb. Or they call each other stupid. And sometimes it's just play. Most of it is just play. But like, when multiple people say that, it creates that environment where saying those negative things is okay. Where people can say, oh, like, you're stupid. Or like, you're different. But like. Yeah. These kids have so much power. And there's so many of these kids where they can answer questions like that, that, that, that. Right. But they think that they're dumb. So they either act dumb or they don't answer questions. Just because it's cool. Or it's the way that they perceive themselves. And like, how do you change that? Yeah. How can we make a difference? I don't. That's something we need to keep figuring out. Unless you have an answer magically. Yeah. There's so much more to that. Yeah. I also think. And this kind of goes back to troublemakers a little bit. Because like, I think some kids think, oh, I get in trouble all the time. That means I'm stupid. Like, having some behavioral issues is different than not knowing things. Like, I think it's the troublemakers who are like, the smartest. Because they know how to like, get to other people. They are very smart at getting people's attention, for sure. So like, there's one kid in particular who just, he likes making a scene. He likes to be a center of attention. And he's a little bit, you know, like, get up and leave the class. Like, just out of nowhere. And the teacher will be like, yeah, you're getting a text home. But he is so smart. Like, we played each other in Connect 4. And I'm really good at Connect 4, just saying. And he beat me first try. And I was like, dang, I'm actually like, struggling right now. And he beat me. And I was like, that's also like, I help out in reading class. And like, reading is different than like, playing Connect 4. But I'm like, this kid just outsmarted me. And he's a sixth grader. And he's one of the kids who like, needs extra help. Yeah. In reading. And I'm just like, wow. There are so many like, instances where like, certain strengths are not recognized. Yeah. I feel like we could talk about kid experiences. Yeah, we could. Like, especially now in this point in the semester. Yeah. I think I should talk about, really quick, about my experience actually teaching this class. Yep. Yeah. We can talk about that. Which... Which... What I actually... It was actually surprising because they were more well behaved than usual. And that made me like, confused. Because I was like, are you guys just bored? Like, is that why you're quiet? Or are you actually listening to me? Or are you trying to judge me because this is my first time like, teaching? It was kind of like, nerve-wracking. I was like, why aren't you guys like, getting out of your seats and talking to each other like you usually do? I mean, they did do a little bit of that. But for the most part though, it was really good. And then afterwards, I felt like more kids were asking me to help them with the lesson rather than just chatting with me. Because they liked to chat with me. But they were like, oh, can you explain this thing that you said in the lesson? And I was like, whoa. This is teaching. So yeah, it was a really good experience. That's so cool you got that experience. Yeah. Are there... I feel like a lot of our great experiences have come from SITE specifically. There haven't been as many conversations we've actually connected with in class. But of the few that I can remember, I think the one that was almost the most impactful was the dream school one where we talked about just what school would we have if we wanted a perfect place? And setting those dreams high, where does our imagination take us? I think that exercise is interesting because it's like, we all want to think big, but also we know this is unattainable. And that's why I feel like you sometimes struggle with dreaming big, and it's not always possible. I dream way too big. You do. But yeah, let's talk about it. Because I felt like my group could have been dreaming even bigger. Because when you think about your big dreams, you do have to have smaller steps along the way, but there's always going to be that big goal that you're looking towards. I don't know. What stood out to you about the dream school conversation? The dream school is that we didn't have to worry about money. We didn't have to worry about funding. We had the best teachers. We had students who wanted to be in classes because we were creating environments that made their education sustainable. We supported families. We supported communities. We were able to develop curriculums that were culturally responsive, trauma-informed, involved different student experiences. We didn't have to read about a textbook anymore. We read about student experiences. We read about what the people in the community experienced. Everything that we have been learning about that schools have been trying to make changes, what if it was just there? What if we could just snap and it was there? It felt refreshing. My group was kind of talking about students learning each other's languages and having a very cultural exchange-type deal going on. Also, well, it was the English major, so, of course, we were thinking all about books. We were like, oh, we should have books in all different languages. Even books for fun can be like if you are learning Spanish, you can read a book for fun in Spanish, and that could be part of the lesson. For English, you read a book that's in Spanish for English class. The lines are less sharp between courses and experiences. Plants. Plants in school. Yes, the biology or whatever, science group made me think about that. We also were like, let's put books everywhere. I personally said, let's put slides everywhere. I don't think that would be that hard to do, to have slides in school. That might be a safety issue. Honestly, I think it might be something. Yeah, there's slides everywhere. Actually, or escalators. We should have escalators. Why don't we have escalators? That would be awesome. Water slide? Okay, now we're dreaming big. That would help a lot of disabled people, not going to lie. Anyways. I guess we have elevators. Anyways, we're getting off track. Continue. The other big conversation that I can remember, it was just from the panel today. I've known Jack Littlestole for a little while, so I know a little bit more. I probably have some bias into what he has to say, but I was hoping he would talk about the Minnesota Education Commissioner. I know I talked about it a little bit in the fourth discussion post, just about saving one student at a time, opposed to saving schools, what making change can be. The way that Jack answered the question now, because he's a teacher, I feel like it gave me some... It made that reflection happen, because how can I actually know what's happening in a school without seeing that firsthand? Jack was a grad student last year. Now he's in his first year, and he's realizing, maybe he still doesn't entirely agree with what the Education Commissioner says, like why we got to turn a ship around, blah, blah, blah. Why can't we send out lifeboats? The students that he is affecting, he's doing it 100 every day. Those are the students that he cares about, and he'll create his own curriculum. He'll spend extra time in schools, and he'll love his experience, even if he might not necessarily agree with what administration is doing, or what other things that are happening in the school are. He gives the students that he has all he's got, and that matters. I'm still not entirely convinced, because I still want to drink big. Yeah, not that you can't. But I don't want to swallow that pill and give up. I want that change to be there. Jack is proof that people can keep going. I don't want this to inflate my ego, but when he says we can make teachers that are like us, teachers that all want to aspire to make change, then maybe we can do it. That's how you make those changes in systems. And I'm not saying I'm perfect. I know I have a hell of a lot to learn, but if there were more teachers that were open-minded and willing to learn different perspectives, and willing to make those changes, that want to make changes, maybe we can do that one day. Yeah. Yeah. Sorry, there was a different thing I wanted to go off of, so now I'm forgetting. Yeah, because what you were saying is, when he was there last year, he was more like, why are we dreaming small, why can't we dream big? But now he's... Are you saying he kind of leans more into affecting people individually now, like from what you've seen? I think he's realized that affecting an individual doesn't mean you have to affect one person at a time. Yeah. Maybe you can affect individuals, plural, in the environment that you're in. And all the students that he is working with, he's changing their lives. Yeah. Well, it's like synergy. Like, you affect one person, but you also affect... You affect one person, like, individually, but if you affect 100 people individually, that's a whole, like, community of people that are going to, like, do things in the world. And that's, like, each individual's impact is actually a huge impact. And, like, that bigger impact is, like, bigger than the sum of its parts, you know? Yeah. So that's why it's okay to start small. And all the teachers today on the panel were like, oh, my favorite part of a day was, like, when this one student or when this one group of students, blah, blah, blah. They're not focusing on, like, oh, all my students today all did it. Like, they're all focusing on, like, small moments that were impactful. And if they have that every day, then that's a lot of good impactful moments. So even when it seems like you're taking, like, one step at a time, baby steps each day, like, they are evidence that, like, it grows into something more. And, like, if we think about our teachers that we've had in the past, like, we probably all, we still remember all our teachers. Like, they have such a huge impact. Those are the conversations that really meant a lot to me. I wish we had more of those types of conversations in class. But now that we've covered these three big areas, overall, we've talked a little bit about our reflections, a little bit about our growth. Like, why do we still continue to teach? Why, I guess, you're not going to be enrolled in CI 3902 next semester because you're going to Spain. But I'm going to CI 3902. I will be in 3902 next year. Next year, next year. But I, like, why am I still going? And it's for those hopeful stories of, like, while, yeah, I might not be able to enter a school and instantly say, bada bing, bada boom, problems are gone. Like, if I start making those individual connections, if I do what I'm doing at Hidden River, where I'm connecting with students, where I can talk to them one-on-one, maybe I won't change who they're going to be. But I can provide that source of just someone who cares, someone who listens. And maybe they'll think back down the line, like, there are people here that want me to succeed, that realize my potential. And even if it's just one student, like, they can have cascading impacts. Like, sure, a person might not be able to start a movement, but if it's people that are coming together, if it's people that you interact with, if those people, if all those people come together, that might be able to start it. If we get more teachers that want to make change, if we make more students that realize they can change, then those environments can sort of shift. And that's why I want to continue to teach. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, it's kind of what we've been saying. Like, the key word is impact. But, like, and also drawing what someone said today at the panel, like, I think it was the guy with the baseball cap, I forget. But Mitch, that was his name. He was saying, like, really at the end of the day, like, what the kids remember is, like, the connection. Like, he said there was a kid who he didn't talk to that much, but that kid was like, oh, you're my favorite. And that's just, like, a little moment can mean a lot. And even, like, today, there was a student who had been having a bad day. And I don't – never mind. I'm just going to teach it. But, yeah, I also feel like it's because a lot of kids are, like, starting out their day or starting out with maybe, like, some negativity in their life. So you might not be, like, completely changing them as a person, but you might be, like, counteracting those negative forces in their life to make sure that they're not constantly worrying about things outside school or even school. Like, good teachers are people who encourage their students and make their classrooms a comfortable space. And, yeah, connection is – I feel like connection is the key. Like, that's really – out of the whole semester, like, that's been the thing that stands out to me. Like, I don't remember everything the kids have learned. And I don't remember my past teachers for the lessons they – the individual lessons they taught. I remember them for the feelings that they brought me as educators. So it really is about, like, relationships. That's why it's also extra difficult, because you get so connected to these people, and they all have their own identities and struggles. And that's why, like, teachers are so strong, because they still want to help and make an impact despite all that. Well, I am going into CI 3902 next semester. That doesn't mean I'm going to be sticking with the social studies path. I have been considering special education, just because I love working with students one-on-one. And that's what I have realized this semester. While I have – Mr. Haugen has allowed me to be in front, be that teaching force, I can't be a lecturer to a class of 30. I like those small groups. I like those one-on-one conversations where I can get real with the students. I can be like, I don't know what we're learning. I don't really care, but what are you doing? What do you like? And, sure, they should probably be doing their work. But what matters more? Right. Like, there was – oh, my. Okay, I could go on forever and ever, but that's not – We just want to talk so much about the students. Like, it's all about the students. And the students that might need more support than more are the ones that I really connect with. The students that come up and say – like, the students that say hi to me every day, and they're like, oh, Mr. Haugen, and stuff like that. And they're just excited to see me just because I'm willing to give them more attention and more time than maybe any other teacher has before. And there have been challenges in special education. I've visited a few classes. But that's what I'm thinking about right now, and I'm glad that this class has put me in a space where I can still question which path I want to go down. Do you think you want to be a teacher? I know you've been talking to me about – It's definitely – it's definitely something that I am heavily considering. I'm just so, like, someone who weighs my options way too much. Like, it's like a choice overload, honestly. Because I know I can – there's a lot I could succeed at, and maybe that's why I'd be a good teacher, because I feel like I can kind of do well at – I know that sounds braggy, but I do kind of feel like I do well at anything that I try. But, I mean, I've always been like, ah, I could teach people. Like, it's always been in the back of my mind. And recently I was like, if that's always been in the back of my mind, then it's always been there. It's always been something that I've wanted, and it's always been something that I feel like I could do. So why should I just – why shouldn't I just do it? And being in the classroom has made me realize, oh, yeah, like, I like this. I think I'm good at it. Why not, you know? So, yeah, I'm definitely considering it more than I did before. But I also definitely want to try out more, like, age groups too. And I'm realizing I do really – I think young kids are really awesome. I mean, I need to work more with older kids, but I think young kids are really cool, and they just, like, bring such cool perspectives and, like, imaginations to things. So I think I'm kind of leaning more towards the younger crowd than I originally was, but, yeah. I don't want to make anything official because that scares me, but I'm closer to that point. That's what these reflections are for, and that's why I've had them. Yeah. That was our podcast. We've talked about our reflections from this class, service learning, and where we're at now. Any closing thoughts? Teachers are cool. So are students. Thanks, Jaehan. Please give us an A. Should we talk about it, or should we just put that in writing? Like, what are – what grade? We were supposed to do it in writing, actually. I was wrong. Oh, we are supposed to do it in writing? It's supposed to be a paper. Yeah. Like a one-page paper. That was what she was talking about at the beginning. We just talked about which grade you're going to get. So we just need to record the beginning real quick. Okay. Do you want to record the beginning? Reveal how long this is. Oh! What does it say? 54. That's not too bad. Hi, this is Allie Parker. And Logan Ara. And this is our final synthesis project podcast.